Chapter 12
Connor
A soft snore against my ear pulls a giddy smile onto my face.
Sunlight filters through the window, gently coaxing me into consciousness and urging me to start the day.
Tai’s face is tucked into the curve of my neck, one leg thrown possessively over my hip.
It’s tempting to stay right here forever, wrapped up in him like this.
I’ve always been an early riser. The stillness of morning gives me quiet moments of reflection before the chaos of the day takes over, and today I need that more than usual.
I nuzzle my nose into Tai’s hair, breathing in that intoxicating sweetness that makes me pull him even tighter against my chest. He hums contentedly and cuddles closer, making my chest tighten at how right it feels.
Last night was incredible. I’ve never experienced such a strong physical response to another person—never imagined I could feel like I might die if they stopped touching me, or that I would splinter apart without their arms to hold me together.
It’s as terrifying as it is thrilling.
Tai made it clear from the beginning that we only had this week. He set those boundaries loud and clear, but my brain keeps betraying me, spinning endless what-ifs and trying to convince me I could change his mind.
What if we could make it work?
What if this was more?
We both have our own lives waiting for us, and it wouldn’t be fair to ask either of us to make sacrifices. But after a lifetime of putting aside my own desires and always prioritizing everyone else’s needs, my selfish heart is insisting that this time I take what I want.
And it wants him.
Is he wondering the same thing? Wondering if we could at least try?
My thoughts are too loud to rest, so I slide my arms free and slip out of bed. Right now, I need my routine to clear my head. Today will be busy, and I need my head straight or I’ll wear this heartbreak on my sleeve all week.
I spent an hour and a half in the gym, until my clothes are soaked through and my muscles are quivering with exhaustion.
For the first time I can remember, it doesn’t help, only twists my thoughts into tighter knots.
By the time I finish and head back up to our room, I’m more confused than I was when I left.
The idea of falling for someone I’ve only known for a handful of days feels ludicrous. It’s illogical—utterly ridiculous—and until five days ago, I would have turned my nose up at the very notion.
Now, I’m not so sure.
Tai realizes something is wrong the moment I walk in, sweaty and carrying his coffee and breakfast. I can see it in the careful way his eyes track me. He stands without a word, takes the food from my hands, and sets it on the table before sliding his arms around my waist and pulling me into a hug.
“Was last night too much?” he asks softly.
I want to tell him that no, it wasn’t enough, and that’s the whole problem. Instead, I break the one promise we made to each other. I tell him I’m fine, that I’m just hungry from the workout, and that everything is great.
I lie, then seal it with a deep kiss.
He doesn’t believe me, but he lets me pretend, and he pretends right along with me.
We eat breakfast and spend the morning relaxing by the water, though the silent moments feel heavier than yesterday.
After lunch, we get pulled into the wedding to-dos for the day, and I simultaneously love and hate the distraction it provides.
Cho, Andrew, and the rest of the wedding party wait for us in a large ballroom.
Hours drag by as we review where everyone has to stand, which music cues to listen for, and a dozen other tiny details that seem endless.
My only real task is to escort a bridesmaid down the aisle and then stand at the front with a smile until it’s over.
Why we need three full hours—one hundred and eighty fucking minutes—to practice something so simple is beyond me.
By the time the bride and groom are finally satisfied, my legs ache from standing all day and my mood has soured considerably.
“Okay everyone!” Cho calls out, still as chipper as she was when we started. “The restaurant is delivering dinner shortly, so just hang around while we get a table ready.”
“Do we have to?” a quiet voice whispers from behind me.
I turn to find Tai watching me with a guarded smile. Despite everything churning inside me, calm washes over me the moment he’s near. His presence soothes every tense muscle, easing the strain from my shoulders.
“I think we’d get in trouble if we snuck away,” I murmur.
He pushes his bottom lip out in an exaggerated pout that makes me groan under my breath. “Just for a few minutes? I’ll make it worth your while.” He turns and heads toward the door leading to a small patio, not even bothering to check if I’m following.
Of course I am.
The sun blinds me as I step outside. Before I can even blink against the brightness, a hand latches onto my wrist and tugs me around the corner. Tai pushes me against the wall and locks his hands behind my neck.
“I’ve wanted to do this all day,” he whispers, pausing inches away. “Is this okay?”
His uncertainty shatters the last of my resolve. “Shut up and kiss me,” I breathe, closing the final bit of distance between us.
Something inside me settles every time we kiss, like my body finally exhales. “I missed you,” I admit against his mouth, the words slipping out without thought to consequence.
“We’ve been in the same room all day.”
I pull back, staring into his eyes with far too much honesty. “That’s the thing, isn’t it? I fucking miss you even when you’re right here with me. How are we going to—”
“Stop,” he growls, and his mouth crashes into mine. The sharp pressure of his teeth stings my bottom lip, and I open for him instantly, letting our tongues meet in a heated, desperate dance. My hands glide down his spine until my palms find the firm curve of his ass.
With a nudge of my knee, I spread his legs and slot my thigh between them, drawing him even closer. Soft whimpers spill from his lips, mingling with the shared air between us as he pulls back just enough to pepper my swollen bottom lip with tender kisses.
“You’re going to get me worked up,” he breathes, “and it’ll make things very uncomfortable when we have to go back in.”
“Let’s just run away,” I whisper.
He lets out a pitiful little noise. “Don’t.”
“But—”
“Just don’t,” he begs, silencing me once more with his lips.
Our kiss softens, his hands cradling my cheeks while mine settle around his waist. He gasps when I spin us around and press his back against the wall, my palm resting beside his head as I lean in and claim his mouth again.
“I like it when you’re under me,” I murmur, kissing a slow path along his jaw until I reach his ear. “Do you like being under me?”
“Maybe I want you under me,” he retorts, nipping playfully at my earlobe. “What if I want to be on top of you?”
“That could be arranged.”
“You going to back up those bold words with action?” he taunts. He slides his hand under my shirt and rakes his fingernails through the hair on my stomach.
“Now who’s making who unfit for public eyes?” I ask with a quiet huff.
He drags me back to him, and we lose ourselves in each other until the hinges of the door squeal and Cho calls his name from inside.
“Got that handled?” I tease.
His laugh ghosts across my mouth. I lean in and plant one last, lingering soft kiss on him before pushing his hair back from his face and tucking it gently behind his ear.
Everything inside me aches as he leans into my touch, and it feels like severing my own limb as I finally pull away from him.
We say nothing else as we walk around the corner.
If Cho is surprised to see us together, she doesn’t show it. “Dinner’s here!” she calls out, her sweet smile still firmly in place.
My eyes drift to Tai, who looks cool and composed as they chat. Is this not affecting him the same way it’s affecting me? My entire world has been flipped upside down, and when I think about leaving him…
It fucking hurts.
I watch him walk ahead of me, his long hair flowing over his shoulders as he laughs at something Cho says. It makes no sense to be this tied up in someone I just met.
Someone who isn’t meant to be mine for more than this fleeting moment.
Maybe it would be wiser to create some space between us now, before we reach a point of no return. Or maybe I’m already there.
I shake my head. Creating some distance is the only way I’ll leave with my heart in one piece.