Chapter 11
Kelsie
I’m at war with every instinct in my body.
My brain tells me to leave, to walk away and not touch him.
But every cell. Every molecule. Every part of my being wants to hate fuck him right now. To let him fuck me against this wall so hard it will shake him free from my memories and get him out of my system once and for all.
I close my eyes tightly, trying to shut out the arousal that churns and twists through my bloodstream like a goddamn hurricane.
I remind myself why fucking him would be a bad idea.
Even though it would feel so, so good.
Every moment I’ve spent in Hayes’s company today has increased the level of desire that lives in me like an electric live wire, super-charged and amped, ready to spark with one touch from him.
As Hayes presses in closer, his arms crooked at my sides to block me in, my nipples harden and poke against my tank and my chest heaves against his bare torso.
Jesus H. Christ. How am I supposed to resist him when he’s this close to me in this state of undress?
I keep my fingers locked in position at the waistband of his sweats, but they itch to roam over the heat of his body. He’s still shirtless and his broad shoulders and tempting muscular chest are too strong for me to resist. I lift my hand and flatten my palm against his pecs, the connection producing a sizzling sensation that shoots straight south and floods my panties.
I let out an aggravated grunt. I’m so turned on and angry, and I don’t know what to do with all these emotions. All I know is I have a raging need to crash my mouth against his and fucking kiss the hell out of him.
I shove my fingers through his tousled hair, lock my grip, and pull his mouth toward mine. Our lips crash together in a brutal collision of need, angst, and desire.
Hayes groans against my lips and I fist the ends of his hair tighter in my grasp. I’m not sure if it’s meant to prod him to kiss me harder, or it’s lashing out against this attraction.
All I know for certain is I might die if he doesn’t get naked and fuck me right this instant.
I throw a leg around his waist and his hands curl underneath my ass, lifting my feet off the floor and pinning me against the wall. I wrap my other leg around his backside and dig my ankles into his lower back. When his hard erection wedges in place between my legs, we each let out a sigh of relief.
Our bodies now aligned, Hayes begins to thrust against me, grunting with every wild grind of his cock over my leggings. My panties are damp and the friction over my clit has me bearing down as he moves against me.
Yes, yes, yes. This is what I need.
“Fuck me, Hayes,” I murmur between choppy breaths. Hayes pulls back and stares at me with a desire so strong I just might collapse from its impact.
Somewhere in the quiet of the house I hear footsteps coming down the stairs. One of our other roommates is on their way down to the kitchen. Although we are relatively hidden against the wall and are out of view from anyone, it’s not absolutely private either.
Hayes spins us around and walks down the hall to my bedroom, kicking my door closed with his heel before dropping me on the bed.
“Take off your pants,” he orders and my eyes flare at his command. I love this naughty side of Hayes. He unties his sweatpants and shoves them down his legs. My mouth dries as I gape at his hard cock springing free.
God, how I’ve missed that bad boy.
“Commando?” I say, raising a brow as I lift my ass and wiggle my leggings down to my feet before kicking them off.
Hayes quirks a smile and then drops to the floor in front of me, pressing his fingers into my inner thighs and spreading my legs wide.
His mouth is on me in a flash. With one swipe of his tongue, he licks a strip of my skin so close to where I want him, I tremor in response. He wastes no time with teasing kisses or touches.
This isn’t about love or sweet flirtation.
This is down and dirty, get you out of my system, straight up hate fucking.
Pinching the seam of my panties, he shoves the cotton panel over to expose my core, and then zeroes in on my clit.
I cry out and squirm underneath the warmth of his mouth. He nips, sucks, and licks at my pussy, tonguing at my entrance as I hold on to my sheets for dear life.
“Fuck, Kels. I need to be inside you.”
He says this as he thrusts two fingers inside my pussy and I spasm and cry out.
“Yes!”
The orgasm crashes through me without warning, hitting me with the intensity of an earthquake, shaking me to the core.
My breaths come out in labored pants as I flop back against the mattress. Closing my eyes, I hear a condom wrapper being ripped open. I’m not sure where it came from, but I don’t care.
When I lift my head, I watch Hayes as he sheathes his cock, pulling it tight at the base before stroking it in his grip. When our eyes connect again, he smirks.
“You still hate me?”
“More than ever,” I sputter out, trying to keep the smile off my face, and then gasp when he draws a thumb through my seam, using the wetness gathered there to lubricate his cock. Then he slams inside me and literally takes my breath away.
Memories come flashing back in a speedy torrent as Hayes sets a punishing rhythm, rocking his hips forward and back. I remember the first time we fucked inside my Paris flat, knowing instantly that the connection we shared was too big for just a one-night stand. I worked so hard to guard my heart, but somehow Hayes knew the code. He had the key all along.
I’d hoped he lost it after he left me in Paris.
Emotions swirl like tide pools inside my head as I valiantly try to block them out. I focus on the sensations that build between my legs. With each thrust of his pelvis, Hayes brings me closer and closer to the edge again.
“Fuck, Kels,” he murmurs, grinding and tilting his hips to drive harder and faster. “You going to be a good girl and come again?”
“Fuck you, Hayes. I’m not your girl.”
He chuckles and leans down to bite my shoulder.
That motherfucker. I’ll show him.
I snag my hands behind him and dig my fingernails into his skin, dragging them sharply down his back. The growl it produces from his chest has me trembling in pleasure so I do it again.
“You filthy little brat,” he sneers before he crushes his mouth over mine for a possessively dirty kiss. I suck on his tongue and he bites at my lower lip.
I come in a rush of climatic sparks, shooting into the cosmos like a runaway star. My heels dig into his calves and he grunts in either pleasure or pain, I’m not sure which.
“So. Fucking. Good,” Hayes mutters out before dropping his head into my neck and, with three more pumps of his hips, he releases inside me. I can feel his dick pulsing against my inner walls and I clench in response.
Finally, Hayes lets out a long breath and pulls out, rolling to his side next to me.
We lay there for a few moments, silence descending upon us, bringing us back to reality.
If that wasn’t enough, my phone rings from somewhere down the hallway where I dropped it during our heated kiss.
“Oh, shit,” I sputter, remembering I’m supposed to be meeting Ben at the bar. I jump out of bed to search for my panties. When I locate them, I bend over to slip them on just as Hayes encircles my wrist with his fingers. I snap my head to stare at him.
“Don’t go, Kels. Stay with me.”
He’s propped himself up on an elbow, his dark hair hanging loosely at his shoulders. When we were back in Paris, he’d told me he was going to have it cut before he started school again. But he didn’t. It’s longer now than when we first met at the sidewalk café. His dark hair and long eyelashes are what drew me to him in the first place.
But now…they only remind me of the hurt he caused me and I don’t want to feel that way.
I shake his hand free and continue to get dressed, ignoring his request for me not to leave.
Maybe a part of me wants to stay here. But the other part—the one that still wants to exact my revenge and get even with him—wants to show him I don’t need him anymore. I have another guy who is interested and won’t hurt me because I won’t ever let another guy that close to my heart again.
“I’m late. This was a mistake.” I adjust my shirt, tugging it over my breasts and then fluffing my hair with a slide of my fingers through the strands. “It’s a one and done, Hayes. Nothing’s changed.”
He springs up and sits on the edge of my bed. I avoid his eyes because I don’t want to see what’s there.
A sigh leaves his lips. “Yes, it has and you know it.”
Spinning on my heels, I point a finger at him. “Don’t tell me what I do or don’t know, Hayes. The only thing I know right now is that I’m late for my date with Ben.”
He scoffs. “So you’re just gonna fuck me and then run off and fuck him too, Kels? Is this all a game to you?”
His eyes flash with pain and for a second I feel a wave of guilt wash over me.
But then the moment is gone. Hayes stands up, rips off the used condom, and throws it in my trash with an angry bark of laughter. He bends down to slide on his discarded sweats and stalks off toward the door.
When he turns back to face me, his expression has changed. It’s morphed into something like resigned anguish.
“You are the most aggravating woman I’ve ever known, you know that?”
I cross my arms over my chest. “And you’re the worst. I guess we’re even.”
In two strides, he’s backed me into a wall again, slapping one hand above my head to hover over me.
“You say that, Kels, but I know the truth. You’re using that guy because he’s safe.”
I scoff and roll my eyes. “Safe? He’s a 200-pound hockey player. How is that safe?”
Hayes bends down and pins me with his eyes. “He’s safe because he’s not me.”
“Thank God for that.”
The words come rushing from my mouth and I push him away, turning around to stomp out of my room. I snatch up the phone from the hallway floor, grab my jacket, and walk out the front door.
How the hell did things get so screwed up?
And how much longer can I last before I admit that he’s right?