Chapter 4
The good thing about ripping out drywall was that it was a mindless task and I could let myself think. The chunks gave way easily, and the crash as they hit the pavement fifteen feet below was extremely satisfying. It was physical and monotonous, and I appreciated the time to puzzle through all that was Leith. Rip, toss, thunk, over and over, as my mind spun out.
Years ago, my first real relationship ended in disaster but really opened my eyes. Todd wasn’t local and we’d met online. Almost from the start, he’d introduced me to BDSM, insisting he was a Dom and I was submissive. I always traveled to him, which was a good two hours away, and he controlled much of my life over the few months we were together. Nick had seen it for the toxic relationship it was and had gently given me advice and support. It was enough to make me think, and when I attempted to talk to Todd about it and he’d tried to hit me, in the name of Dominance, I’d gotten out. I was forever thankful I’d been in a position to do so when so many couldn’t.
But deep in my soul, I’d known what Todd had said and did was not what the lifestyle was about. After I was free of him, I started doing research. I’d watched videos and read blogs, joined forums and asked questions, and most of all, learned. It quickly became obvious that just about everything Todd said had been a lie, or at least a twisted version of the truth. And as I explored BDSM and my own desires, it became just as clear that I wasn’t the masochistic submissive that Todd had claimed I was. Sure, I was a little masochistic because I enjoyed sensual pain. But I definitely wasn’t submissive. Dominance was in my core, the need to control my consensual partners and give them what they needed, both in a scene and outside of it.
Leith called to that part of me in a way few ever had. It was clear to me that he was a naturally submissive person, but was he actually a sub? I didn’t know. I wasn’t sure it mattered, at least not right now. We weren’t together and I wasn’t going to make a move. I would have to talk to him, though, because we needed to discuss what happened earlier. I needed to make sure he was okay.
Turning back to the wall, I realized that while I’d been lost in thought, I’d finished this part of the task. The wall was now nothing but ruined insulation and bare studs. Fortunately the insulation was the paper sheet kind, so it was easy enough to tear out and toss. But I would need gloves and a respirator before I tackled that. It didn’t look like it was all bad, just the parts right around the window. The rest probably could stay, but I’d need to double check it.
I put on the necessary safety gear and got to work, glad I’d thought to grab it from my truck. Last year I’d upsized from my beat-up Colorado to a much newer Ram 1500. Since I also used it for work, Nick paid for mileage and reimbursed for gas when I took it on a job. And he didn’t care if I used the tools and supplies he provided on my own time, as long as I took responsibility if something happened to them. It was a mutually beneficial situation.
Once that was all finished, I was sweaty and gross, and contemplating raiding Leith’s fridge for something cold to drink. At the very least, I knew he wouldn’t fault me for a cold glass of water from the tap. Glancing at my watch, I noticed I’d been working for more than an hour, and Leith was due home in less than forty minutes. I bit back a curse. The overachiever in me wanted to have the wall completely replaced and ready for spackle by the time Leith got home, and there was no way that was happening now. But at least I could get the insulation in and part of the drywall up if I hustled.
* * * *
I was in the zone, so focused on my task that I totally missed Leith getting home. I wouldn’t have even noticed until I was finished and made my way downstairs, had he not come up to see what I was doing.
“Wow. You’ve gotten so much done!”
His voice startled me and I whipped around, glad I’d already put in enough screws that the drywall was attached and didn’t fall. I blew out a breath when I saw him standing there, one crutch under his left arm, the other one nowhere to be seen. He grinned, a little sheepish.
“I apologize. I didn’t mean to startle you.”
I waved that off. “You didn’t need to come up. You should be avoiding stairs.”
Something passed over his face, but it was gone before I could figure it out. “I wanted to see what you’d done.”
I motioned like Vanna White, which made him chuckle. I’d managed to repair the casement and replace the insulation, as well as hang the drywall for the top part of the wall. A few more screws and I could move onto the lower half, which was a lot easier to do on my own.
“Just need to fit in these last two pieces. And then I can tape the seams and spackle. It’s the quick dry stuff, so in a couple of hours I should be able to sand and add a second layer if necessary. It’ll be ready to paint by tomorrow.”
Leith’s gaze flitted around the room. “You make it look so easy.”
I shrugged, not wanting to take undue credit. “I’ve been doing this kind of thing for ten years. I’ve had a lot of practice.”
“I suppose you’re right.” Leith’s lips quirked up. Not quite a smile, but close. I tried to figure out where his mind was, and when I couldn’t, I opened my mouth to ask. But he beat me to it, speaking first and changing the topic. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
If he’d been able bodied, I would have jumped at the chance, if for no other reason than he could hold things in place. But I wanted him to heal, not set his recovery back, so I weighed my words before I gave him a wink. “Nah. I got this.”
It wasn’t my imagination that Leith’s nostrils flared, and something lit in his amazing eyes. But it only lasted a second, and then was gone again before I figured it out. He cleared his throat.
“I expect you’re famished, after all this hard work. I can get started on dinner, if you wish, as early as it is. Or prepare and deliver a snack to tide you over?”
I scratched the side of my head where a trickle of sweat was making me itch. I was hungry but it was too early to eat a full meal. I also didn’t want him to try to navigate the stairs carrying food, as with his knee, that was a potentially disastrous situation. He could injure himself further. I couldn’t have that.
“How about I come down for a snack in about twenty minutes?” I said, carefully watching his face. “I just need to get this drywall up, and it’d be nice to take a break.”
“Oh. Yes, all right.” He took a careful step backward, disappointment making his shoulders sag. “I’ll have refreshments on the kitchen table when you’re ready.”
Dammit. “Leith…”
But he was gone. Unconsciously, I took several steps toward the door, ready to go after him and fix it, but I stopped myself before I made it to the hall. Maybe it was better to give him a few minutes, while I finished the wall, and then we could talk about all of it. I blew out a breath and finished the task as quickly as possible. Then I washed up in the cracked bathroom sink and headed downstairs.
I half expected him to have disappeared again, leaving the so-called refreshments on the table. But he was still fussing with a plate of freshly cut fruit. I’d been quick, maybe even faster than twenty minutes, and I caught him off guard.
“This looks great,” I said, keeping my voice soft so as not to startle him again. Once in a day was enough. Leith glanced over his shoulder and the sheer pleasure in his expression from the praise warmed my insides.
“Have a seat. Would you like lemonade?”
I would have told him that I would get it, just so he didn’t have to move around as much, but then I saw the pitcher on the table. I smiled as I sat. “Sounds perfect.”
He poured the glass and set it in front of me, next to the small plate he’d already put down. The cloth napkin and fork were a nice touch. He’d really set the scene, taking care, and it struck me that we were veering into domestic servitude territory. Unless, of course, he just liked being a good host.
There was a chance I was projecting my own desires onto this man.
“You’re joining me, right?” I asked as I reached for the platter of fruit, serving myself several choice pieces.
Leith shook his head. “After the cupcake this afternoon, and then dinner in a bit, if I’m not careful, I’ll find myself in a crapulent state.”
I squinted at him. “You made that word up.”
He let out a bright peel of laughter. “I assure you, I did not.”
“Hmm. You assure me, huh?” I made a show of pulling out my phone, loving that the ice was broken and his shoulders had relaxed. I did a quick search, and then let out a low whistle. “Would you look at that. It is a real word.”
“I did tell you.”
That sounded much nicer than I told you so. I chuckled. “You did. You mentioned you liked interesting words. Is it because you’re a librarian?”
Leith hummed thoughtfully, and it gave me the opportunity to nudge him toward the chair next to me. He seemed not to notice but did sit. I didn’t miss the way he let out a relieved sigh once he’d taken a load off. I knew he’d had to have built up new muscles from being on crutches all this time, but that didn’t mean it was easy.
“I suppose it’s more accurate to say I became a librarian because of my love of words. I’ve always loved to read, ever since I was very young, and the library always seemed like a magical place. By the time I entered college, I was dedicated to a degree in library sciences.”
It wasn’t lost on me how we were complete opposites in that department. I was a TV and movie sort of guy, and I’d barely made it through high school. I wasn’t going to point that out though. And the turn in conversation gave me an opportunity to change the subject.
“Speaking of the library…” I ate a strawberry that was perfectly ripe, the flavor nearly making me moan. “We need to talk about what happened earlier.”
Leith’s brows scrunched together. “Whatever do you mean?”
I wiped my fingers on my napkin and took a drink before I answered. “I mean, my tone and words. You know, I was a bit, uh, forward or whatever. I stepped over a line and—”
“Because you went all dommish on me?”
My brain stuttered out for a good six seconds before I managed to bring it back online. Then all I could do was shake my head, a small chuckle escaping. “The man who uses words like wamble and crapulent now pulls out dommish?”
The mischief in his gaze would be my undoing. I was sure of it.
“I never said all words that I like to use are real. Just most of them.” Leith’s expression sobered and he took a breath. “As I said before, there’s no need to apologize. In fact, perhaps I’m the one who should. It’s incredibly possible that it’s been an extended period of time since I’ve been able to play. And that may have affected my response to you. If two men, who naturally fall into particular roles happen to interact, it’s entirely plausible that they bring out certain attributes in each other.”
It took me an embarrassingly long minute to actually work out what he was saying. “You’re a submissive?”
“And you’re a Dominant. Is that what we just said?” He blinked innocently. But there was no mistaking the twinkle in his eye that belied said innocence.
I coughed out a laugh. “And apparently you’re a brat.”
“Heavens no. I’m a good boy.”
My world stuttered to a halt, right then and there. Brain function, gone. Heart, refusing to beat. Lungs, not working. Because he meant that. This man didn’t mouth off or act up for attention. He didn’t like to break the rules just for the funishment. He very much liked following rules and behaving himself.
I leaned into his space. “You want to be a good boy for Daddy?”
Leith’s sharp inhalation was all I needed.