Chapter Twenty-Eight Hunter
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Hunter
This was getting out of control. One second we were laughing and flinging ingredients at each other and the next Lucky was in my arms, looking up at me with those beautiful eyes of hers, her chest heaving against mine, and I was overwhelmed.
I honestly couldn’t remember the last time I had wanted someone this much. And it wasn’t just because she was unbelievably sexy, which she was, but because of how intensely I liked her as a person. Spending time with her was the best part of my day.
Scratch that. Sleeping next to her was the best part.
When she’d woken up, the bed had felt too empty without her. I needed her next to me.
I didn’t know what that meant.
What I did know was that if I didn’t kiss her soon, I might spontaneously combust from all this thwarted lust. Sugar sparkled on her neck and the desire to lick it and taste how sweet she was solidified the air in my lungs.
Blood rushed away from my head, pooling in my gut, and I was breathless and desperate and bent my face down toward hers.
I needed to tell her what I wanted. I had actually started to but couldn’t finish.
This wasn’t okay. I couldn’t do this. Especially not with Rodney on board. He was making me self-conscious. I wasn’t ready for her to find out. Not yet.
The oven timer beeped, and the sound broke through the haze. “You should get that. We don’t want them to burn.”
She only stared up at me, apparently as unable to move as I was to let her go. My throat felt too tight, my pulse throbbed. Everything said to hold on.
I had to let go, though. I made myself release her and took several steps back. There was a major internal battle happening inside me right now, and I was afraid that I might lose. I had a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. My frustrated libido was not happy with me and I physically felt the pain of stepping away.
The only thing left to do was joke. “If there’s one thing I remember from training, it’s that fires on boats are very bad.”
She had a deer-in-the-headlights expression on her face. If I’d been more insecure, I would have worried that she didn’t feel the same. But I knew that she did. I had proof of it now.
My guess was that she had decided not to act on it. It was the smarter decision.
The one I should have been making.
But when it came to her ... all she had to do was ask. I would have burned down this boat for her if that was what she wanted.
It took her a few moments to spring into action. I tried to make my breathing go back to normal while she took the cookies out of the oven and turned off the timer.
I had never been in a situation like this before, and so I had no idea how to navigate it. I wanted to sweep her up into my arms and go back to our cabin and show her how much I liked her.
“I’ll clean this up,” I said, looking everywhere but at her.
“Right,” she said, folding her arms over her chest. “I’ll help.”
That was the last thing I needed. She had to go away or else I was going to start kissing her and never stop.
Lucky was special and it was killing me to stay away from her.
“No, take Rodney his cookies. I’ll get this cleaned up and then I’ll go relieve Pieter.” I couldn’t have her climbing into bed with me at four in the morning and pretend like things were the way they had been before. I got a broom and dustpan and started sweeping.
“I can clean, too,” she said. “Let me just—”
“Lucky.” I ground her name out in warning, my entire body tensing.
She swayed toward me.
“Just go,” I said, feeling very defeated.
She grabbed the tray and had to walk past me. I shoved my body against the cabinets so that she wouldn’t accidentally brush against me. I was so weak for her right now that I didn’t think I could take even something that small.
Then I felt bad when I saw the expression on her face. She was disappointed, confused, and relieved all at the same time.
As soon as she left, I missed her again. Now I was worried that I’d hurt her feelings, and that was the last thing I wanted.
So I bounded up the stairs after her, intending to make sure that she was okay.
She had already entered the main salon, and I heard Rodney sheepishly say, “I’m sorry to have woken you up.”
“That’s literally what I’m here for,” she said in an upbeat voice. She worked so hard for her guests. I wondered if they even knew.
Or appreciated her.
“You probably think this was a strange request,” he said.
Lucky laughed and my gut clenched at the sound. I loved her laugh. Then she listed off a bunch of requests she’d gotten from other charter guests that included illegal drugs, zoo animals, and an insane amount of toilet paper. “So no, cookies aren’t too strange a request.”
He made an appreciative sound. “This is delicious. Did the chef make this?”
“No, I did.”
“You’re a wonderful baker,” he said, and I had a strange swell of pride in my chest. Rodney was extremely picky.
That’s my girl.
She thanked him and then asked him why he had requested cookies.
“Because of my wife.” Rodney and his wife had been friends with my parents, but I’d never really known him that well. I knew his wife dying had utterly destroyed him and that’s why my parents had offered him the boat. “On our first date, two of the tires on my car had gone flat, so I was an hour late picking her up. I grabbed some packaged chocolate chip cookies from a gas station as an apology. She didn’t give me a hard time about it but said that she would make me her world-famous chocolate chip cookies to let me know what I’d been missing out on.”
I’d heard that story a bunch of times. He had told it at the funeral.
“That’s sweet,” Lucky said.
“And every year since then, she made me those chocolate chip cookies for our anniversary. Today would have been our fortieth wedding anniversary. She died last year.”
Lucky said how sorry she was.
“Thank you. My wife loved the ocean. That’s one of the reasons why I came here. Hank offered it to me last minute and I agreed because she would have loved this. I like to think she’s still here in spirit, enjoying it with me.”
It was obvious how sad he still was. I could hear it in his voice.
“I’m sure she is,” she said.
“You know, I hate to say this, but I think your cookies might be almost as good as hers. Her dream was to open a bakery in Paris when we retired. Now it’s time for me to retire and ...” I could hear him clearing his throat a couple of times. “I’m sorry, I’m not usually this much of a watering pot.”
“It’s okay,” she said. “Would you tell me about her?”
He sounded surprised. “Really?”
“Yes, really. My dream is to open a bakery, too, so she sounds like someone I would love to hear more about.”
And Lucky just sat there with him. Letting him talk about his wife, pour out his heart to her. I glanced around the corner so that I could see her sweet face. This wasn’t trying to placate him for a bigger tip. She was someone who had experienced a lot of loss, and it had made her more compassionate. Kinder.
Definitely too good for me.
I went back down to the galley to clean it, like I’d told her I would. As I started sweeping I thought about Rodney and his wife. Growing up, it had always been evident how much they had loved each other.
My heart painfully constricted in my chest as I realized that I wanted what he’d had. I wanted Lucky. But this thing with her was about so much more than just sex.
She and I could laugh and play and talk and chill. She was funny, adorable, loyal, sweet, and a million other good things. We were friends and she was retina-burning hot. I’d never really had something like that before with anyone.
These warm feelings that flooded into my chest every time I thought about her ... I suddenly realized what they meant, and it was like a semitruck had slammed into me going a hundred miles an hour.
My heart raced so quickly that I couldn’t catch my breath.
I was in love with Lucky.
I let out a groan because I had no idea what to do next.
Drop-off day arrived and I was glad to see Rodney go. He asked for Lucky’s cell number and promised to send her some of his wife’s recipes. He shot me a conspiratorial wink before he left, and I was grateful that he’d kept my secret. I had to figure things out before I spoke to Lucky. Part of me wanted to tell her everything and confess that I had fallen for her, but my brain convinced me to keep quiet and try to go back to how we’d been before.
She needed me to go slow and I was willing to do that for her.
Rodney left each of us ten thousand dollars, and the crew acted like it was burning a hole in their pockets. They made plans to go out, and Lucky reluctantly agreed, probably because the captain had told her to unify the crew and she’d decided that drinking with them was the best way since they’d refused to show up for her planned activities.
We were in an upscale restaurant in Nice. I was nursing my beer because alcohol would loosen my tongue and I would tell her everything.
“Why hasn’t anyone passed that bread basket down here?” she demanded.
I asked Kai for it and then handed it to her. “There you go, my little carbivore.”
Whoops. I shouldn’t be calling her pet names. Instead I started telling her a story about the night me and my fraternity brothers had stolen a cow from a farm in upstate New York and had brought it to the second floor of our frat house. It had been a problem because apparently cows could go upstairs but not downstairs.
She nearly choked because she was laughing so hard, and all I could think about was how much I loved her.
I probably had a goofy grin on my face.
“Let’s go back to the ship and get in the hot tub!” Georgia yelled out, interrupting us.
Lucky in a swimsuit? Yes, please.
“Do you want to?” I asked.
“Sure!” she agreed enthusiastically, and my heart rate doubled.
I wanted to get back to the ship as quickly as possible.
“Is everyone ready to go?” Thomas asked the table, and we all started standing up.
Because I had to control so many of my urges, sometimes they would slip out. Like now, when I leaned over to her and said, “It is getting late. You should probably take me home with you.”
She shook her head but I saw her cheeks flush, her pupils dilate. Heard how she caught her breath.
I was playing with fire and didn’t much care if I got burned. I knew that I should worry.
But I just didn’t.
We poured out from the restaurant onto the sidewalk. Georgia had her arm looped through Pieter’s. Relationships could happen on the yacht, no matter what the captain or my dad said.
“See? I told you. Puns work,” I said.
Because despite her relationship issues and fear of loss and love of rules, things could work out between us.
I just needed her to give me a chance.