CHAPTER FIVE
Reese
The team room door closes behind me with a click that sounds like a prison lock. My head spins from Coach's warning, from the weight of tomorrow's inspection, from the knowledge that I might have destroyed eight futures with my selfishness.
The hallway is empty, fluorescent lights humming overhead. Everyone else is still inside, probably strategizing how to salvage tomorrow's practice. How to hide what we've become. What I've made them become.
I need air. Need space. Need to get my suppressants from my bag and double the dose like I promised, even though Tyler warned me about the side effects of exceeding the recommended amount. Dizziness, nausea, possible suppression failure if my body rejects the overload.
Worth it if it keeps my scent under control for tomorrow.
"Reese."
I turn to find Eli standing in the hallway behind me. He must have slipped out while I was lost in my spiral of self-recrimination. His sandy brown hair is still damp from the shower, and there's something in his brown eyes I haven't seen before. Something that makes my pulse skip.
"I need to go," I say, but my feet don't move.
"No," he says quietly. "You don't."
He steps closer, and I catch his scent - paper and lightning, like the moment before a storm hits. I've always thought of Eli as the most controlled of them all, the one who observes and calculates but never acts on impulse.
The way he's looking at me now suggests I've been very wrong about that.
"Eli—"
"Stop." Another step closer. "Stop thinking. Stop planning. Stop running."
"I'm not running."
"You've been running since you got here." His voice is still quiet, but there's an edge to it now. "From us. From yourself. From what this could be."
"What what could be?" My back hits the wall. I hadn't realized I was backing up.
"This."
He moves faster than I expect, hands bracing on either side of my head, caging me in. His body doesn't touch mine, but I can feel the heat radiating off him, can smell the way his scent sharpens with want.
"Eli, we can't—"
"Why?" His head dips lower, breath ghosting across my neck. "Because of tomorrow? Because of policies? Because you think keeping distance will somehow fix this?"
"Because it's complicated—"
"Everything about this is complicated." His nose traces the line of my throat, not quite touching, and I have to bite back a whimper. "That doesn't mean it's wrong."
"The team—"
"The team is falling apart because we're all fighting this. Fighting you. Fighting ourselves." He pulls back enough to meet my eyes, and the intensity there makes my knees weak. "I've run probability scenarios, Reese. Calculated outcomes. Do you know what the math says?"
I shake my head, not trusting my voice.
"We're stronger with you. Every metric, every measurement, every possible calculation shows the same result. You make us better."
"I'm destroying you—"
"No." The word comes out sharp, almost angry. "You're saving us. We just haven't figured out how to let you."
His hand moves to cup my jaw, thumb tracing my lower lip with unexpected gentleness. "Stop fighting so hard, Reese. Stop pretending you don't feel this too."
"I..." My voice breaks. "I don't know what this is."
"Liar."
Before I can respond, his mouth crashes into mine.
The kiss is nothing like I expected from quiet, analytical Eli.
It's demanding, consuming, his tongue sliding against mine with a dominance that makes my head spin.
His hand tangles in my hair, tilting my head to the angle he wants, taking control with an easy authority that sends heat spiraling through my core.
I gasp against his mouth, and he swallows the sound, pressing closer until I'm pinned between his body and the wall. He's all lean muscle and controlled strength, and when he nips at my lower lip, I can't stop the whimper that escapes.
This is Eli - careful, calculating Eli - kissing me like he wants to devour me, like he's been starving for this, like all his control was just a dam waiting to break.
My hands come up to his chest, whether to push him away or pull him closer I don't know. The muscles under my palms flex, and he makes a sound low in his throat that's pure Alpha satisfaction.
Then another scent hits me. Leather and rain.
Jackson.
I jerk back, breaking the kiss. "Stop."
Eli freezes instantly, but doesn't move away. His breathing is ragged, eyes dark with want, but there's something else there too. Understanding. Like he knew this moment would come.
"Jackson," I whisper. "You and Jackson. I can smell him on you."
Something flickers across his face - not guilt, exactly, but acknowledgment. "Yes."
"I won't come between you. I won't be the reason—"
"Reese." He says my name like it means everything. "You won't come between us. You'll be the glue that keeps us from falling apart."
I stare at him, trying to process. "What?"
He steps back slightly, giving me room to breathe but not to run.
"Jackson and I... we fuck. Have been for two years. Started as convenience, stress relief. Two Alphas who understood each other without the complications of designation dynamics. He needed the release and the knowledge that it wouldn’t fuck everything up in the process. "
"But it's more than that now."
A small smile touches his lips, but there's something raw in it. "Yes."
"And you, Eli? You need...?"
"Him." Simple. Direct. The word carries weight that makes my chest tight.
"But also more," he continues. "Neither of us wants to admit what this became because...
" He runs a hand through his hair, the first sign of uncertainty I've seen from him.
"Because we both want you, too. And that's not supposed to be possible.
Not rational. Not something we can calculate or control. "
"Eli—"
"He's been pulling away since you arrived. Not because he doesn't want you, or me, but because he does. And wanting both of us? Wanting something that complicated? After what Meredith did to him?" His jaw tightens. "It's easier for him to shut down than risk that kind of vulnerability again."
My mind races, pieces clicking into place. Jackson's careful distance. The way he and Eli orbit each other without ever quite touching in public. The tension that's more than just friendship, less than what they're both clearly capable of feeling.
"You love him," I say quietly.
"I'm in love with him." The correction is important. "There's a difference between loving someone and being in love with them. I'm both. Have been for a while."
"And he doesn't know?"
"He knows. He just can't say it back. Can't risk it. Not after..." Eli's hands clench. "Meredith broke something in him. Made him believe that feelings make you weak, that wanting makes you vulnerable to manipulation."
"But you stayed."
"Of course I stayed." He looks at me like I'm missing something obvious. "You don't abandon someone just because they can't love you the way you need them to. You wait. You be patient. You show them through actions what words can't fix."
"That's..." I search for the right word. "That's heartbreaking."
"It was." He steps closer again, not touching but close enough that I can feel his warmth. "Until you."
"I don't understand."
"I've watched him watch you. The way he tracks your movements, catalogues your scents. He knew you were an Omega from day one - his sensitivity to pheromones is off the charts. But instead of running, he stayed. Instead of transferring to another team, he keeps showing up."
"That doesn't mean—"
"He told me about Riverside. About telling you his history. Jackson doesn't talk about Meredith with anyone. Ever. But he told you."
"We were all emotionally compromised—"
"No." Eli's hand comes up to cup my face again, thumb tracing my cheekbone. "He chose to trust you. And when I kissed you just now? When you responded like that? It just proved something."
"What?"
"We don't have to choose. Neither does he. Maybe the three of us together make more sense than any two of us apart."
"That's not how relationships work—"
"Says who? The same people who say Omegas can't cox Alpha crews?
The same ones who say mixed designation teams are disasters waiting to happen?
" His fingers tug at my hair before relaxing and running through to the ends.
"Maybe it's time to stop letting other people's rules dictate what we're capable of. "
I look up at him, this Alpha who just kissed me senseless, who loves a man who can't say it back, who sees patterns everyone else misses.
"Finding strength in surrender," I say. "Stop fighting the bonds and start using them."
"Yes." He leans in again, but this time it's just to rest his forehead against mine. "Exactly that."
"I don't know how to be what you both need."
"You don't have to know. You just have to stop running long enough to find out."
"The inspection—"
"Will go better if we stop pretending. If we row like what we are instead of what we're supposed to be."
"A pack."
"A family." He corrects. "Chosen, not forced. Bound by more than designation or biology. Bound by choice."
Footsteps echo from the team room, voices approaching. Eli steps back, but his eyes hold mine.
"Think about it," he says. "Jackson's not the only one who's been pulling away. You have too. Maybe it's time to stop."
Gray appears around the corner, stopping short when he sees us. His eyes narrow slightly, taking in our positions, probably scenting the arousal we're both throwing off.
"Tank practice," he says carefully. "Five minutes."
Eli nods and walks past him without another word, but his fingers brush mine as he goes. A promise. A question. An invitation.
Gray watches him go, then turns to me. "You okay?"
"I don't know," I answer honestly.
"Fair." He pauses. "Whatever just happened, did it help or make things worse?"
I think about Eli's kiss, his revelation, his certainty that I'm not the problem but the solution.
"Maybe both?"
"Also fair." He runs a hand through his dark hair. "Look, Reese, I know this is complicated—"
"That's the word of the day, apparently."
"—but we need to figure it out. Tomorrow—"
"Tomorrow we show them what we really are," I interrupt. "A team that works better together than apart. Even if together is... unconventional."
Something shifts in his expression. "You think we should stop hiding it?"
"I think we should stop fighting it. There's a difference."
Before he can respond, the rest of the team emerges from the room. Jackson's eyes find mine immediately, and I see the moment he recognizes what happened. His jaw tightens, but there's something else there too. Not anger.
Hope.
Eli moves to Jackson's side, their shoulders brushing. Jackson doesn't pull away. If anything, he leans in slightly, and Eli's hand brushes his lower back in a gesture so intimate it makes my chest tight.
"Tanks," Gray announces. "Let's see if we can remember how to row."
As we head toward the indoor training facility, I catch Jackson watching me. When our eyes meet, he doesn't look away this time.
Maybe Eli's right. Maybe I'm not what breaks them apart.
Maybe I'm what holds them together.