31. Elle
The conversation I had with my mother was still in the forefront of my mind even a week later.
Everything she said made sense to me, but at the same time, I was still confused about what to do and how to move forward. I was dragging my feet making an appointment to see a doctor, I knew I had to be at least four to five weeks along. Morning sickness was kicking my arse every day, and soon my secret was going to come out, as all secrets did in Blessings.
If the gossips didn’t notice my weight gain, then my emotional outbursts were bound to catch me out. Crying was for the birds, and I was the biggest bird of all. Just yesterday I cried in front of Mr Hanson because I dropped a jar of asparagus spears. No one eats asparagus from a jar, so it was not exactly a disaster but at the time it was the worst thing to happen to me. The deaf old coot left the shop in such a hurry he left his change on the bench which made me cry again. I ended up begging Claudia to take it to him so I couldn’t be accused of stealing.
What the hell was happening to me?
Not that long ago I would have swept up the broken glass without a single bit of remorse, then pocketed the change and blamed him for being forgetful.
Crying sucked donkey dick.
Thank goodness today was my day off. Today all I intended on doing after hugging the toilet bowl once my breakfast decided it was time to come up, clean the house, have some lunch then throw that up then go for my walk to pick Miracle up from school. I promised her that we will drop into the ambulance station to meet the new paramedic. According to dad he arrived three days ago but he had not officially started in his new job until today.
The new paramedic was the talk of Blessings. Every resident and their dog had walked past his house rubber necking to get a look at him. Everyone except me. I knew he rented a house from my dad; he had custody of his little brother who was years younger, and that was all I needed to know. My life was so topsy turvy thanks to my surprise oops the arrival of a new resident wasn’t exactly on the top of my priority list, but Miracle was eager to meet the kid and I couldn’t say no to my niece.
“Oh, please lord kill me now,” I begged the universe wiping my face with a wet face cloth. For the last half hour my arse has been planted on the cold tiles, while I brought up the entire contents of my stomach and then some.
I had no one to blame but myself, after my breakfast I waited for the nausea, but it didn’t come, so I got cocky. Lunch time came and I stupidly thought if cereal could stay in my belly, I figured go big with my next meal of daggy dogs and some fried kabana.
Huge mistake.
One bite of a battered covered hot dog and two small pieces of oil fried meat and I was running to the bathroom, barely making it to the bathroom sink let alone the toilet.
Pressing a hand to my belly testing that the gurgling and churning was over, cautiously climbing to my feet, which took a herculean effort on my part, I shuffled to the sink and nearly vomited again when I saw the mess in it.
“Why do women do to this to themselves intentionally ?” I wondered out loud, turning on the hot water to help the mess go down the drain hole. “Yuck!”
I washed my face, and brushed my teeth then grabbed the cleaning supplies from the sink cupboard and spent another fifteen minutes cleaning thoroughly, ridding the room of the smell of my upturned food, before leaving the room.
Casting an eye at the clock on my bedside table I shrieked when I saw the time.
“How is that possible?” I asked again out loud, I only had ten minutes before school let out for the day, forgetting that today was a half day for Miracle. One of her teachers was ill so all afternoon classes were cancelled giving the kids a semi long weekend.
“Damn it Elle, your pregnant not an imbecile. Get your shit together.”
Stop talking out loud to yourself woman, I berated myself thankfully this time in my head. Was I talking to the baby unconsciously, or was this yet another symptom of pregnancy to make my life hell?
Who knew, maybe a talk with Claudia might be an idea. I can’t remember her talking out loud to herself or to her unborn child. Perhaps it was just me losing my mind. Neither one appealed to me.
I tossed around the idea of calling my doctor for an appointment then decided it could wait until Monday. Friday afternoon was too late to see her anyway plus I needed more time with my thoughts before I was sent for tests and given official dates and such. Confirmation from a GP will make it really real. I wasn’t ready for that.
It took me less than five minutes to walk to the school, but I liked to be there before the bell and watch Miracle skip towards me, it was a highlight of my day, doubly so now that she was allowed to have Optimus with her at school. Although the permission to keep the pug with her was only until the education department finished an investigation on whether or not it was legally binding under the service dog act. I didn’t know there was one in existence, but it made sense on some level otherwise every Joe Blow could take a dog to school or work.
Claudia and mum downloaded all the information, filled in the applications and now all that was needed was to wait to see if Miracle had a viable case for a service dog, and if Optimus was an appropriate candidate. That I could not see happening, but my fingers and toes were crossed for her.
Lost in my head, I failed to notice the woman coming towards me until it was too late to hide.
Oh shit.
“Hello Elle Blessing,” Mrs Snodgrass called out primly, using my full name making it sound like an insult.
“Well hello to you Edwina Snodgrass,” I replied giving her my best fake but insulting smile. Since we were little, she refused to address me and my sisters by anything than our first and last names. A former teacher at Blessings Primary School she could put the fear of god in any kid in her classroom and she enjoyed it. A little too much.
Pursing her carnation red lipstick stained lips at me, her eyes narrowed with pure hatred. “I should have used the cane on you Elle Blessings.”
“Probably,” I laughed thinking back on the amount of times she threatened to during my six years under her tutelage.
“I hear Claudia Blessing is with child. Is that a good idea considering your family history?
My laughter instantly dried up, my mood souring with one intentional nasty comment. Generally, out of us three sisters, I was the level-headed one, the sensible sister, I was also the protective big sister, and hearing old bitch Snodgrass condemning my sister’s pregnancy hit more than a nerve. Such cruelness cemented my decision not to tell anyone about my pregnancy until I was damn good and ready, my thoughts about that now was the whole town can go and get stuffed.
Stepping in front of my former teacher, I nailed her with what I hoped was my best death glare, my temper firing.
“Listen to me you old busy body, you talk about my sister or anyone in my family in a derogatory way ever again I will make sure the whole town knows you had an affair with Principal Paul,” I threatened but I was not finished. “Don’t bother denying it, I saw you two in the store cupboard more than once,” I informed letting my anger towards to old bitch feed me. “Having sex with a man who was married and twice your age, won’t Father Donaldson love to hear that.” Madder than a cut snake, I willed myself not to call her every curse under the sun.
“How dare you speak to me that way,” the old lady spluttered, red faced.
“And how dare you speak of my sister’s painful loss like she deserved it,” I shouted at her, gaining attention from some of the mum’s gathering for school pick up. “Bitch.” I added then stormed off to wait for Miracle at my usual spot still fuming and pissed off and no longer in the mood to play nice with the new arrivals to town.
Maybe I can bribe Miracle with cupcakes and hot chocolate, I mused to myself, praising myself for not saying it out loud.
I blamed the hormones.