37. Let It All Out
37
LET IT ALL OUT
A ngel waited in the car while Coy went in to get their dinner. She’d been dying for pizza and placed the order with cheesy breadsticks.
“It’s packed in there,” he said.
“Good night for takeout,” she said. “Smells good.”
“Got to feed the baby in the belly,” he said.
She forced a smile.
Her skin felt as if it was going to jump off her body and take off on a run down the street.
It was as if everything in her life had to be so complicated and it was never ending.
“He’s hungry,” she said. “Maybe hungrier than his mama.”
“I like the sound of that,” he said. “Mama.”
“I believe your mother is called that by her grandkids already,” she said.
“True,” he said. “Are you sure you’re okay? You’ve been quiet most of the day.”
“Just tired,” she said. “And hungry.”
“You feel fine?”
She wanted to growl. “Other than being pregnant, I feel fine. Are you going to ask me every day?”
“Sorry,” he said. “I’m just concerned.”
“Don’t be,” she said. “You know what I know. Nothing to be concerned about.”
He reached his hand over and laid it on hers in the SUV and squeezed her fingers.
They got home and before she could get her laptop out of the back, he was grabbing that with his and putting both over his shoulder. She had the food in her arms since he’d handed it over when he got in.
“I’ve got it,” he said.
“Oh my God, Coy. I can carry a pizza. Unlock the door before I dump it on your head.”
He laughed as if he thought she was joking. She wasn’t.
She started to eat when he went to shower and change. She’d do it next. She was too hungry to wait and wanted it hot.
When he came out, she’d already had one slice and a piece of cheesy bread.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“To shower and change.”
“Are you done eating?”
“No,” she said. “But if I eat too fast I feel ill. I’ll take a break and shower and if I’m still hungry when I’m done, I’ll have more.”
“Eat if you’re hungry.”
“Coy,” she said. “I know how to eat. Trust me.”
She walked to their room, undressed, and jumped in the shower. After cleaning up, she put on shorts and a T-shirt, then returned to the kitchen.
She picked up a second slice of pizza and started to eat it.
The silence didn’t bother her, but it seemed to annoy him.
And when Coy was fidgeting, it was annoying to her.
She got up to put her plate in the dishwasher, then grabbed the foil to start wrapping up their leftovers.
“I’ve got it,” he said.
Rather than argue with him, she said, “I’m going to call my mother.”
She picked up her phone and started to walk toward the stairs. “Where are you going?” he asked.
“To Spencer’s room for some privacy or do you need me to talk in front of you?”
“No,” he said. “I just didn’t know what you were doing. You never go upstairs to make a call.”
“I am now,” she said, smiling and climbed the steps.
She got to her brother’s room and shut the door, then sat on the bed. She almost went on the deck, but then Coy would be able to hear her and she needed to vent to someone.
“Hi, Angel. I didn’t think you’d be calling tonight.”
“Is this a bad time?” she asked. Please don’t be a bad time. She needed to talk to someone and had no one else.
“Of course not,” her mother said. “What’s going on? You sound like you want to scratch someone’s eyes out.”
She laughed. “See, you know that without even seeing me.”
“Is it Coy?”
“Right on the first try.”
“Let it all out,” her mother said. “You’ll feel better.”
“I doubt it,” she said. “But here goes. He’s babying me. I mean worse than Dad and Spencer ever did. He knows how much I hate it and he’s doing it.”
“He’s worried,” her mother said.
“Mom,” she said. “He doesn’t let me do anything . He pays for everything.”
“Don’t go there again, Angel. You know that isn’t going to change and you have to accept it. Most women would love that situation. That they can use their salary for whatever they want.”
“I know,” she said. “I’m not like most women. But fine, I won’t say that again. He cooks more than me and we had this conversation already. I get it, he likes things a certain way.”
“Did you tell him what I told you about showing you how he likes them?” her mother asked.
“I did. He did show me how he liked his scrubs folded and I do that now. I even picked on him that it wasn’t so hard to do and he agreed. But now I can’t carry a grocery bag in. Tonight, he grabbed my laptop before I could get it and then went to take our pizza out of my hands. I told him I was going to dump it on him if he did it again.”
“He’s trying to be helpful,” her mother said.
“Mom. I don’t need you defending him. He’s treating me like a doll. A porcelain one at that. If that isn’t bad enough, Abby found out I was pregnant and went around telling everyone in the office before even asking if it was true.”
She told her mother how it all went down this morning.
“You two kept it quiet longer than I thought you would.”
“That’s not the point,” she said. “As if it wasn’t bad enough that she did that, everyone could easily figure out the timing.”
“A moot point, Angel, let it go.”
“I’m trying to. But what I thought was going to happen did. I saw Coy listening to Abby talking to Emma and gossiping about how we had to get married and wondered whose idea it was. He wanted to march in and take care of it and I told him not to. That it would only fuel things more.”
“I agree with you,” her mother said. “But I also think he should have said something to her a long time ago.”
“Doesn’t matter,” she said. “Because after I told him not to do it, he did it anyway by the end of the day. He thinks I don’t know, but everything gets back to me.”
“It’s his practice,” her mother said.
“I know. I get that. But the least he could have done was wait a few days. Or maybe tell her when he caught her doing it about another person. But to tell her to keep her attention on her job and out of others’ lives on the day that I was the topic of her remarks makes it seem as if I can’t handle it on my own.”
“You’ve got a good point. Would you have said anything?”
“That’s the thing,” she said, throwing her arms around. She was pacing in the room now. “I was going to say something, but I wanted to work it out in my head. He didn’t even ask me or talk to me about it. Just decided he was going to be the man and deal with it.”
“Not the perfect man you thought he was going to be for years, is he?”
“No,” she said, sitting in a chair by the glass doors.
“But do you love him?”
“Of course I do,” she said. “I’m still allowed to be pissed off at him though.”
“You are,” her mother said. “This is only the beginning. You haven’t even had your son yet and can start to figure out discipline and schedules.”
“Urgh! I just can’t. I want to get through the rest of this pregnancy without feeling like he’s afraid I’m going to break. Mom, I’m already scared and he’s not making it any better.”
“What are you scared about?” her mother asked softly.
“What you went through with me,” she said. “They had no explanation as to why you went into labor so early, but it couldn’t be stopped. It’s like all those things that could go wrong, you don’t think about until you’re actually pregnant.”
“That is true,” her mother said. “But nothing is going to go wrong.”
“I say that, but I don’t think Coy believes me.”
“It’s what you believe,” her mother said. “Talk to him and you’ll work it out. Or go talk to Helena. Maybe she can give you a bit of insight too.”
“I’ll think about it. We don’t have a lot going on this weekend, but I do feel better now.”
“I’m glad,” her mother said. “Sometimes it does help to just vent.”
“You’ve always been an ear for me to do it,” she said and hung up.
Angel got up and went to the glass doors and looked out at the water in the distance. It was going to be a great place to raise a family and she had to tell herself that everything she was feeling and going through was normal.
She took a few steady breaths and opened the bedroom door only to see Coy turning the corner toward her.
All her calm went out the window.
“How much trouble am I in?” he asked.