40. Not In My Control
NOT IN MY CONTROL
“ I t’s great to see you back on the field,” Gus said ten days later. “Even if it’s only warming up throwing some. Heard you can’t do much other than that for a solid week.”
“Yeah,” Warren said. He was still getting headaches and told the team doctors that. They’d seemed surprised, or maybe they were surprised that he admitted it.
He was told to take it slow and they’d talk again in a few days. He wouldn’t be able to get released until the league’s doctor saw him anyway. They’d said he wasn’t ready for that yet.
Shit, he didn’t think he was even ready for this and had to focus his feet to get on the field today.
All he’d be doing was some light work in the gym and throwing the ball on the field. He wouldn’t be running plays, more like watching on the sidelines and helping the backup with things.
“You’ll be back before you know it,” Gus said. “I’m sure it’s hard.”
“It is,” he said. They didn’t need to know what was so hard on him.
The worry about his head or his relationship.
He hadn’t seen Emma since Thanksgiving, having gone to the game on Sunday to support his team on the sidelines. There was no reason for her to come to it and she hadn’t offered.
They’d had a few calls on video this week but not much more.
She was lost in one of her worlds, and she wasn’t surfacing for air. Not even enough for him to say how much he’d gotten done on the homework she’d given him that she didn’t even know he was working on.
So much so that he tried to draft a scene. It was crap to him, but it felt good to get it out.
Maybe it was therapy in a way. That was how he was thinking of it.
“You’ve got to be sick of everyone asking when you’ll be back,” Gus said. “Or the comments on the team tanking. We are holding it together.”
Which was worse because they were still in the hunt for the playoffs. Two more wins and they should cinch it. The next two weeks were going to be hard though and if they could win one of them it’d be a confidence booster for everyone.
Everyone but him.
Did he need the pressure on his shoulders to get out there and perform when he was skittish of getting hit again?
He’d never let anyone in his life know he was afraid of anything.
“You guys are doing a great job,” he said.
“Cody isn’t you,” Gus said. “He’s still really green.”
“He’s young,” he said of the rookie that had been drafted. Their other backup got hurt last week too but should be back this week, hopefully.
“He doesn’t have the raw talent that you do,” Gus said. “Not many do. You’re going to be missed when your time comes. I heard that you want to extend your stay here after your contract is up.”
Warren frowned. “Where did you hear that?”
“Me,” DeMarcus said, moving over. “I heard it too. Mike said that your agent is already making demands for an extension.”
That better not be happening without him knowing, but he wouldn’t throw anyone under the bus.
“I’m more focused on this year,” he said.
“That’s what I say all the time too,” DeMarcus said. “But then Tiff tells me it’s not all about me.”
He laughed when his star wide receiver walked away.
“Don’t listen to him. He’s still pissed at the size of your contract. I think he’s fishing for information for his agent to negotiate or start looking. Making the playoffs will increase his value.”
“That’s not in my control right now,” he said.
He was trying to figure out how fast he could call his agent to find out what the fuck was going on.
“I’m glad you’re here with us this week,” Mike said, walking over. “The same as last week. I thought for sure you were going to spend your last week with Emma.”
“No,” he said. “She’s busy, and I understand my obligations,” he said.
“That’s right,” Mike said, slapping him on the back. “Got to get our money’s worth out of you.”
Warren bit back the growl. It wouldn’t look good if anyone saw him blowing up on the field. It was bound to make it into the news and he didn’t need that.
But damn, it was tiring having to watch everything that came out of his mouth and his actions at all times.
“Don’t worry about me,” Warren said. He picked up the tablet and looked at the plays and moved closer to Cody to go over things. Until he was released, he was going to be a coach and found he didn’t care for it all that much.
At the end of the day, he got in his car and hit the button to call his agent.
“Warren, how are you doing?” Kyle said. “I haven’t talked to you much lately.”
“I’m doing well,” he said. “Getting better each day. Mike told me you’re already in talks about an extension for me. What’s going on?”
“Mike called me the other day and said that they wanted to extend you. I figured I’d wait to hear from you. You know how it goes,” Kyle said. “Maybe you don’t have any part of it and it’s on them.”
He ground his teeth. “So he’s playing games?”
“It’s how it goes,” Kyle said. “I told him there was still another year to go after this. No reason to rush anything. Of course, he takes that as being hard to get.”
“Thanks,” he said. “You know my stance after next year.”
“I know,” Kyle said. “I hate that, but I understand. Even more now too. Seriously, how are you feeling about things?”
“What is to be expected,” he said.
He wasn’t going into detail with anyone and worry that it might get turned around on him. Kyle worked for him; he trusted him as much as he could trust anyone who wasn’t family.
“I’m sure it’s hard,” Kyle said. “I’ve had a few players question their careers at this point. You’ve had three head injuries in about a year. You know there is some talk about that.”
He knew. He’d tried to push those talks off.
He didn’t need anything else in his head.
“There always is,” he said. “Someone has to run their mouth.”
“Between that and you dating Emma and not needing to worry about anything with her family backing, people are spilling more tea in Boston than in 1773.”
“What are you talking about now?” he asked.
“I know you don’t follow talk, but Mike was concerned about it. I’ll send you the link. Just rambling from people, but you know how it is.”
“Yes,” he said. “Do that.”
“Warren, watch out for Mike.”
It wasn’t the first time he’d heard this. Or with any publicist.
“Why?” he asked.
“He’ll do whatever he has to do to get his way and save his job. Remember, it’s his job to turn shit into gold. If someone is talking one way, he’ll do what it takes to drive the narrative the way he wants.”
“I know,” he said.
“I heard he called Tiff and told her to cut the shit with DeMarcus. That she should know better than to drop news before a game and that loss could have fallen on her fiancé’s shoulders, costing him future contract money.”
“Where did you hear that?” he asked.
“From his agent. We got a good laugh out of it. Don’t get me wrong, people’s personal lives always cause issues and you have to compartmentalize.”
“I do that,” he said.
“No one is saying you don’t,” Kyle said.
“Except Mike?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” Kyle said after a pause. “I’m just saying, don’t trust him.”
“Thanks,” he said.
He disconnected and called Mike next. “Warren,” Mike said. “What’s going on?”
“Did you call Emma?” he asked.
“What?” Mike asked. “When?”
“Since I’ve been out, have you called Emma?”
“I don’t remember,” Mike said. “I talk to a lot of people.”
Which told him what he needed to know.
The right answer would have been no. That he’d have no reason to talk to Warren’s girlfriend.
“Don’t mess with me, Mike,” he said and disconnected the call. He looked at the clock. “Fuck!” he shouted and hit the steering wheel with his fist.
Tomorrow would be soon enough to do what had to be done.