19
The exquisite and irresistible flaw in the plan
So, it turned out Aleixandre was having a secret fling with a guy.
Everything about whoever was helping me look into the Cash family was starting to get even weirder.
They were guiding me, but it was icky; I had no idea how they knew what I was plotting.
It made me really nervous, and I was afraid they’d say something, but it was also kind of obvious that this mysterious person really hated the Cash family.
And so, before shit hit the fan, I should probably make the most of their help.
But, first things first, I had a problem I needed to deal with. Driki.
He knocked on the door at 4:00 p.m. on the dot.
He was standing there, backpack on his shoulders, a book in hand, and that unfriendly expression all over his face.
I let him in. He looked around the apartment, frowning.
I knew why. It was a disaster. There were books, sheets, and cans of Coke scattered everywhere.
“Sorry,” I said, apologizing for the mess. “It’s been a tough week.”
Adrik left his backpack on the ground, so maybe he was just as messy.
We’d be on our own because Artie had gone to get a new phone.
“I brought my copy of Jonathan Strange I couldn’t help it. I was so calm that, suddenly, the world seemed more fun. I was howling with laughter until my eyes teared up, and I wiped them, realizing Adrik was watching me, looking kind of serious.
“Sorry to interrupt your sporatic laughing fit, but it’s my turn,” he said, without judging my moment of madness.
I handed him the book, and he started flicking through the pages. I kept wanting to laugh for no reason, but I did my best to hold it in.
“Okay, now shhh.” Adrik cleared his throat and started reading.
I really tried, honestly, but something really strange came over me.
One minute, Adrik was reading normally, and the next, his mouth seemed to be moving in slow motion.
I was puzzled. I could hear him reading but I wasn’t really taking it in.
Was he reading slowly or quickly? Why was he moving his mouth like that?
And why, all of a sudden, was this making me want to laugh?
I pressed my lips together, since he’d asked me to be quiet and let him focus.
I couldn’t mess things up . . . I couldn’t interrupt him . . . I couldn’t . . .
I couldn’t stop myself from laughing uncontrollably, like a sneeze you can’t hold back.
Adrik stopped reading and looked at me, serious.
I immediately covered my mouth with my hand to hold back the laughter and looked at him with my eyes wide open.
He was looking at me too, unemotional.
“Can I read or what?” he complained, although he was starting to seem rather chilled too.
“Sorry,” I apologized, still with my hands over my mouth. “Go on, ignore me.”
Adrik looked down at the book and kept reading.
His voice was normal: low, clear, captivating.
But his mouth, his eyes . . . everything just kept getting stranger and stranger.
I started seeing colors more vividly, and his movements looked like something out of a cartoon.
I was experiencing the world in a wildly psychedelic way.
Was it real? I wanted to check to be certain; I needed to check . . .
“Jude, what the hell are you doing?” Adrik said, frowning.
When his words popped my thought balloon (seriously, I even heard the sound of a balloon deflating), it dawned on me that I’d moved without realizing. I was on all fours, close to him, my index finger about to touch the tip of his nose.
I froze, my hand hovering in front of his face.
“What?” I said, sounding stupid.
“What’s wrong with you?” he asked, looking me up and down like I was out of my mind.
“What’s wrong with you?” I shot back like I had to defend myself. “Why do you do stuff like this?”
Adrik was confused. I could see it on his face, and it almost made me burst out laughing again, but I held it back.
“What things?”
“These things!” I was waving my finger all over the place while he was following it, probably thinking I was going to poke his eye out. “You’re moving your mouth, face, and eyelids, and the colors . . .”
Adrik looked me over, frowning, then looked over at the desk where the incense stick was still releasing smoke. The room was filled with that delicate yet delicious aroma.
“Who gave you this?” he asked me, sounding rather suspicious.
“A friend,” I replied sharply, trying to hold back laughter as I saw his ears flapping around like Dumbo’s. “He got them off some guy who bought them to help him relax, but—”
“Jude,” Adrik cut me off with a big exhale. “That incense has weed, and who knows what else, in it.”
I made an “O” shape with my mouth. Marijuana.
And who knew what else. OMG.
OMG.
OH MY GOD.
All I could do was burst out laughing. Uncontrollable laughter. Adrik raised an eyebrow. Now everything made sense. I felt really strange and really good at the same time, like being weightless and suddenly having a great lust for life.
Why wasn’t Adrik enjoying it?
Why didn’t Adrik enjoy anything?
“Don’t look at me like that. How was I supposed to know?” I said, trying not to laugh. I straightened up and knelt in front of him, lost in thought. “So that’s why rainbows are coming out of your mouth . . .”
“How did you not know?” he replied, looking less than pleased.
“Ah, come on, laugh a little!” I said.
“I don’t know what I should be laughing at,” he replied, serious.
“At anythingggg,” I insisted repeating the g sound in a way that cracked me up big-time. “Is it not having the same effect to you?”
Adrik sighed and shook his head.
“A little, but I’ve got self-control,” he admitted, before continuing, “You should go wash your face, drink some water, and lie down. We’ll put this incense out, and then you can listen to music or something to help you come down from the high.”
He reached out to help me up, but I dodged him, leaned forward slightly, and tapped the tip of his silly nose. Yes, this was real, Oh. My. God.
“I don’t want to lie down,” I said, pushing his hands out of the way.
A thousand thoughts rushed through my mind, everything from jumping off something high to trying new foods. I even wondered what it would feel like to run around naked.
“You have to, you’re high,” Adrik reminded me.
He grabbed my wrist, but I refused to get up. I was having so much fun, and he was being a spoilsport. Boo.
“Why are you always like this?” I complained, exaggerating my movements. Something popped into my head. “Ooh, I’m Adrik, I hate everybody and I’m going to show everyone by walking around all serious, all the time,” I said, imitating his deep voice.
“Yeah, ha, ha, very funny,” he said, pissed off. “Now get up.”