18. Berlin #2
“I can’t believe you and Greta never met each other that year,” Bettina said. “I used to ask her to go out with us, but she was already married to Otto and no fun anymore.” She absently patted her dog, focusing on the wall above Lucy’s head. “She must have gotten pregnant sometime around then.”
Adam brought her a refill and she sat up, turning back to Lucy. “Remind me, who was that guy you were dating? We met him on that epic trip we took to Italy.”
“Spain,” said Lucy. So Bettina remembered after all.
“Right, Spain. We met up with some friends, and he was with them…. Wasn’t he on his way home to Norway?”
“Denmark,” said Lucy.
“Yeah, S?ren? Or J?rgen?”
Lucy took a big sip of her drink. “Bj?rn,” she said.
“Bj?rn,” Bettina all but shouted, “right!” She clapped her hands together, making Til lift his big head and look around the room.
Lucy almost shushed her, sensing Jack’s presence in the apartment directly above them.
“He was hot ,” Bettina said, turning to Adam. “Lucy bagged the best-looking guy in Europe. I was so jealous. Whatever became of him anyway?”
“Wellll,” Lucy said. She could have told them Bj?rn’s entire biography and curriculum vitae, that he’d gotten a PhD at the University of Copenhagen, married a brilliant cardiologist named Astrid, and had two daughters with her.
The first pregnancy had been complicated, and they almost lost the baby.
His mother died of cancer when he was in his twenties.
He was a professor of philosophy now, affiliated with the University of Copenhagen’s Kierkegaard Research Centre, and they lived in a suburb called Charlottenlund and had a view of the ocean.
He commuted to work by train and recently climbed the Matterhorn.
“I really have no idea,” Lucy said. “We didn’t stay in touch. ”
“Classic college fling,” said Bettina.
Bettina seemed to be studying her, and Lucy shifted to find a more comfortable position.
“I had one of those too,” said Adam, offering the bowl of nuts. “Believe me, it’s better when they don’t get serious.”
“It’s better when no relationship gets serious,” said Bettina.
“I’ve found that I’ve never needed to saddle myself with a partner , you know?
” She held her arms out wide when she said “partner,” as if the expectation was to make room for something absurdly unwieldy, like a rhinoceros or an RV. “Did you?”
“Saddle myself?” Lucy said. “Yes, I did. My husband’s away on an extended work trip.”
“So to speak,” said Adam.
“Not ‘so to speak,’?” Lucy said, turning to him in surprise. “Have you been googling Mason?”
“I was curious,” he said with a shrug. He refilled Lucy’s glass then too. Lucy was not a whiskey drinker, and it was hitting her pretty hard.
“Well, now I’m curious,” said Bettina. “Is ‘work trip’ a euphemism for… rehab?”
“?‘Work trip’ is a euphemism for Mars,” said Lucy, proud to talk about Mason, “which is a euphemism for a biosphere in New Mexico.”
“Wait, I’ve heard about this,” said Bettina. “In fact…” She reached for her phone and started scrolling. “I listened to this podcast yesterday— Is he part of that international team, the one that’s all women, except for him?”
“Yes,” said Lucy. “ARC Six. Or no, ARC Five now.”
“ARC Four,” Bettina said. “An Israeli engineer just left.”
“Are you serious?” Lucy said, sitting up. She got her phone out too and did a quick Google search; Aviva had left the biosphere for unspecified reasons. “My God,” she said. “I don’t even know what this is going to mean. Maybe he’ll come home early.”
“Sean Carroll did a whole episode on them,” Bettina said, “and apparently the goal is to keep the thing going with almost no communication. They’re testing psychological resilience for these upcoming long-haul missions. But hang on,” she said, holding up a finger, “getting back to Bj?rn for a sec.”
Lucy did not want to get back to Bj?rn.
“It’s all coming back to me,” Bettina said, narrowing her eyes at Lucy. “He was super smart. And he had to go home for some reason. Exams or something.”
“He was trying to get into a PhD program,” Lucy said. The accuracy of Bettina’s memory was getting very uncomfortable, and she couldn’t figure out how to get her off the topic.
“And did he,” Bettina said, “get in?”
“He did,” said Lucy. “And he was very happy about it.”
“And that was it? It was over between you?”
“Yup,” said Lucy, holding up her hands to show there was nothing more to it. “That was pretty much it, more or less.”
“Huh,” said Bettina. “I kind of figured… I mean we were only kids, but I remember thinking you two had a real connection. I was sure you would find a way to make it work.”
“Yeah, no,” said Lucy, feeling queasy. “We didn’t. Puppy love, that’s all it was.” But in truth it was so much more. Or it was for Lucy anyway. She’d been so happy during those bright, intoxicating days, getting to know him, falling in love.
“And now you’ve got three kids,” Bettina said. “How old are they?”
Lucy’s phone rang, and Greta’s name appeared on the screen. Lucy had never been more grateful for an interruption. “Look,” she said, “it’s your sister!” She answered the call and put Greta on speaker, hoping this would put an end to Bettina’s interrogation.
“Hello!” said Lucy, getting to her feet. “You’ll never believe who I’m with.”
“Hi, Greta,” Bettina said.
“Hey, you,” Adam called out. “Wish you were here.”
“We’re having a late-night, impromptu party,” Lucy said, holding her phone out. “I think I’ve had too much to drink already.”
“But don’t worry,” said Bettina, winking at Lucy, “I walked through your apartment, and it looks totally perfect.”
“How’s Texas?” Adam said eagerly.
They all waited through a moment of quiet, and then Greta said, “I thought I might be calling too late, but apparently I’m interrupting the fun .”
Lucy wished she could start over what was their very first conversation, regretting how flip she’d sounded, how irresponsible. She took Greta off speaker and left the room, leaving Bettina and Adam with the jazz music, the dog, and the whiskey.
“Greta? Can you hear me?” Lucy said, closing the office door and sitting back at the desk where she spent her evenings. It was covered with her pens and notebooks, pads and papers.
“Perfectly,” said Greta. Her voice was clipped and tense, with only the faintest accent.
“Is everything going okay?” said Lucy.
“Everything’s fine,” Greta said, “but there’s cat hair on all the furniture, and I’m having a hard time understanding how to use the vacuum cleaner. Your mother says it’s a whole house system, but I don’t understand what that means.”
“I wasn’t expecting you to have to vacuum,” Lucy said, organizing the mess on her desk. “I have a cleaning lady who comes on Fridays, so I figured she would do it.”
“A cleaning lady?”
“Yeah,” said Lucy. “A Putzfrau ?”
“No, I know what a cleaning lady is,” Greta said, sounding miffed, “but there is no cleaning lady.”
“That’s because Otto wrote to me,” Lucy said carefully, “and he said to tell her not to come.” There was a pregnant pause. “Hello?”
“Can you tell me specifically what Otto said,” Greta asked. “I’d like his exact words.”
Lucy put Greta on speaker again and searched her email.
“To be honest,” she said, “I was pretty surprised because I said I already paid for her for the whole summer, and it’s a lot of house, you know?
— Okay, here it is: he said—and I quote—‘We do not need the services of your housekeeper, as my wife will do all the cleaning.’ I mean…
,” Lucy said, and laughed. “Personally, I’d divorce my husband for less.
No, I’m only kidding,” Lucy added. “Sort of. But anyway, I figured you two were on the same page.”
“Lucy,” Greta said formally, “may I rehire your housekeeper, please?”
“Sorry,” said Lucy. “When I called to tell her y’all didn’t want her to come, she said she was going to spend Fridays with her grandkids.”
“I see,” Greta said, and exhaled heavily. “Well, this is ‘a lot of house,’ as you say, and the pets shed hair all over the place, and my husband is going through two or sometimes three towels a day, and I would have appreciated the help.”
“ Husbands , don’t get me started,” Lucy joked.
“It’s not like mine’s any use these days.
” She heard Tank barking in the background, and it made her heart hurt.
She wondered what room Greta was in, the kitchen?
her bedroom? “I sure miss the dogs,” she said.
“But at least I get to hang out with Adam’s fish. ”
She heard Greta clear her throat. “Adam has a fish?”
“Yeah, poor guy,” said Lucy. “Adam, I mean. I think his trip to New York is making the whole thing feel very final, especially since his wife is getting custody of the dog.”
“His wife ?”
“I mean, soon-to-be ex-wife,” Lucy said, “you know, and hence the fish, if you ask me.”
She expected Greta to say something kind or supportive, but there was silence.
“He’ll be okay,” Lucy said. “He just needs time to process.”
“Right,” said Greta. “How nice he has you to confide in. Sorry, Lucy. I have to go.” And the line went abruptly dead. Lucy looked at her phone, wondering whether the call had dropped or Greta had hung up on her. She had no idea what she could have said to offend her.
She went back into the living room to find Adam and Bettina putting on their jackets, and Til walking in circles with his leash dragging on the floor.
“How’s Greta?” Adam said.
“A little tense,” she said. “She’s annoyed with Otto.”
“She actually said that?” Bettina said, her eyebrows raised.
“Not exactly,” said Lucy. “But it was kind of obvious. Anyone would be, in her situation.” Lucy was prepared to explain what had happened with the cleaning lady, but Bettina was slamming down the rest of her drink while Adam was going around the room, turning off lights.
“You’re coming with us, right?” he said.
“Where?” Lucy said.
“We’re dropping Til at my place,” Bettina said, “and then we’re checking out a band in Neukolln.”
“No, no, no,” said Lucy. She could not wait to climb into Greta’s bed, stiff as it was, and pass out. “Absolutely not. But you guys have fun.”
“Please,” said Bettina, “you have to come.”
“Impossible,” said Lucy, and she hugged her. “But let’s do this again soon.”
Lucy said goodbye to them in the stairwell and walked the one flight up, feeling unsettled.
She couldn’t put her finger on which thing was troubling her most, whether it was the shrinking number of biosphere participants or the whiskey or Greta’s abrupt hang-up or the idea that Bettina had made all her distant memories of Bj?rn feel less like figments of her imagination and more like actual events in her past. Bettina had seen them together. She was a witness.
She opened the door of the apartment to find Jack making himself a sandwich.
“Hey, how was the evening?” she said.
“Really fun. We went to the Legoland Discovery Centre.”
“Your sisters are lucky to have you,” she said. “How much do I owe you?”
“The tickets were twenty euros each.”
Lucy got her wallet and gave him a hundred euros. “And you are officially off duty, sir, until Monday afternoon.” She saluted him.
“Cool,” he said. He looked at her and nodded, trying hard to smile.
Lucy’s breath caught as she took in the earnestness of his expression, the angle of his jaw, the clear blue of his eyes, knowing that a single glimpse of this young man, who was only a few years younger than Bj?rn had been at the time, had surely been enough to make Bettina know everything.