Chapter 3
CHAPTER 3
Last Sail Before the Veil—What a Trip!
H ello, Trixie!
I’m in the middle of planning my wedding, and guess what? I’m getting married on a cruise ship, just like you! But I have no idea where to start—every detail feels so important, and I’m overwhelmed. What was the first thing on your wedding planning checklist? Maybe I can take some inspiration from there.
Sincerely, Bridal Blues Beth
Dear Bridal Blues Beth,
Oh, Beth, that’s amazing! A cruise ship wedding is as magical as it gets. I completely understand that overwhelmed feeling. Planning a wedding, especially one at sea, can feel like trying to steer the ship without a captain. But let me give you some quick tips.
Create a checklist! Finding that perfect dress should be top priority—like maybe a dress that would flow beautifully in the ocean breeze and look just as stunning on a moving ship as it would under the stars. Imagine yourself walking down the aisle with the waves as your backdrop and everything else will start to fall into place.
Once you cross the dress off the list, it will set the course for the rest of your journey. Without it, it’s like choosing your dream destination before picking all the excursions. So, start with that one detail that speaks to you the most. Maybe it’s the dress, maybe it’s the perfect spot on the ship for the ceremony (hello, top deck!), or maybe it’s deciding between coconut cocktails for the reception. Let that one choice steer the way.
Enjoy this incredible adventure, Beth. Smooth sailing ahead!
XOXO Trixie
There is nothing like the thrill of the first day of a cruise. Nothing beats the excitement—the scent of a thoroughly cleaned ship, the promise of adventure ahead, and, of course, the lure of endless dining options with the goal of conquering every last one.
Have I mentioned the dozens of inviting swimming pools, hot tubs, and plethora of onboard attractions—zip-lining, rock climbing, even bumper cars to name a few?
This ship has it all. It’s essentially a floating city filled with sunsets, shopping, and the thrill of escape. And you can bet that every last inch of it carries a heady sense of intoxication.
But, as it turns out, one slimy ex has the power to erase every ounce of that thrill.
My ex to be exact.
Ransom pulls me close and wraps his strong arms around my waist. “Let me handle this.” His voice is smooth, confident, and exactly what I need. He steps forward and glares at the offending party. “Stanton, what do you think you’re doing here?”
Stanton straightens and that smug smile on his face simply grows wider. Stanton is tall but not particularly fit. He’s stocky with a paunch belly that he’s trying unsuccessfully to hide under an expensive blazer. His hair—or what’s left of it—is combed over in a valiant attempt to disguise his ever-growing bald spot, which is vast .
Stanton is basically your average troll who lives under a bridge compared to Ransom.
“What does it look like?” Stanton dares to bark. “I’m taking a cruise with my shiny new fiancée. What do you think I’m doing?” He nods over at Tinsley. “This guy’s not so bright, is he? All looks and no brains.”
Elodie leans my way. “I’m guessing it’s a catching condition,” she murmurs, nodding in the direction of the lithe young blonde draped over Stanton’s arm like an overpriced accessory.
The woman is outrageously gorgeous—young, severely underage for Stanton—and perhaps far too orange as well. Someone has been hitting the spray tan a little too hard. And she just so happens to have a massive diamond ring on her finger that can threaten to sink the ship.
Have I mentioned young? Perhaps too young. Not that there is such a thing in Stanton’s world.
Stanton’s fiancée beams, stepping my way with her hand extended with glee.
“Cornelia Florence Holiday, but everyone calls me Neelie,” she says, picking up my hand and giving it an aggressive shake. That grin of hers takes over her entire face. “I can’t believe I’m actually meeting the Trixie Troublefield. You’re practically famous in Brambleberry Bay!”
“You mean infamous ,” Stanton corrects, but Neelie is relentless in her awe of me.
“Everyone knows about you,” she goes on with marked enthusiasm. “How you dumped your cheating ex and left to live on the high seas! Honestly, your life is like the pinnacle of glamour.”
“ Hey ,” Stanton balks. “I’m the cheating ex in that equation.”
“Duh.” Neelie flicks her diamond-laden wrist his way. “How else would I be scoring all these handbags now? And don’t get me started on the shoes.”
Stanton opens his mouth to say something before glancing over his shoulder and doing a double take. “Never mind. It looks like my wedding gift just arrived and right on time.” He nods my way. “Enjoy.”
Ransom lets out a low growl as I give Stanton one last glare before he whisks Neelie away, muttering something about the lido deck.
Good riddance.
“Here’s hoping he stays out of my line of sight,” I mutter, causing Elodie to snort beside me.
“Oh, come on, Trix,” she teases. “You’ve handled worse than a smarmy ex and his handbag-hunting sidekick. You’ve taken on cold-blooded killers. Speaking of which, if you want to commit a homicide or two, and you need someone to help toss the bodies overboard, I’m your girl.”
Before I can accept her offer, the crowd in front of us erupts into excited whispers. I glance over and feel my stomach drop as I spot a figure approaching the ship’s entrance—a glamorous woman with perfectly coiffed long, dark hair, wearing a navy designer trench coat and oversized sunglasses that do little to hide her identity.
Merritt Garrett.
Of course, that’s Stanton’s twisted gift to me. What would bring me more displeasure on this seven-night cruise than my old high school nemesis?
Merritt just so happens to be flanked by two other women—an older brunette and a bubbly blonde who looks as if she just walked off a photoshoot. Both women look a little off-put as if neither wants to be here, or at least not with Merritt. And knowing Merritt the way I do, they’re probably on her payroll.
But my focus stays on Merritt, her sharp smile cutting through the chatter as she waves at the crew members gathered.
“Oh my gosh, it’s Merritt Garrett!” Tinsley’s voice pitches up several notches as she practically bounces on her toes.
Even Captain Crawford looks starstruck, and he’s met everyone from movie stars to actual royalty. I suppose Merritt just so happens to be nestled somewhere between that range. She’s turned out to be a famous author who writes books that everyone is obsessed with, especially the kind of readers who book luxury cruises. And judging by the mob quickly amassing around her, she’s clearly the celebrity of the hour.
Ransom leans my way. “Did she say Merritt Garrett? As in M.J. Garrett, the thriller writer? ”
“Psychological thrillers,” I say, lackluster.
More than anyone else, I should know that Merritt shines when it comes to head games.
“I’ll admit, I’m impressed with her work,” he says with a touch too much enthusiasm.
I shoot him a look without meaning to. Okay, fine, I so meant to. I don’t see why not. Everything else has gone sideways in the last ten minutes, why not Ransom and me?
Merritt spots us—more to the point, me —and her smile widens as she sashays over with her heels clicking on the polished floor like an approaching predator. “Well, well, well,” she says, dripping with honeyed sarcasm. “Trixie Troublefield. I didn’t realize they were letting just anyone onto this cruise.”
I force a tight smile. “Merritt. I guess I could say the same.”
A high-pitched cackle emits from her, and I swear the chandeliers above are rattling because of it.
“Charming as ever,” she purrs, her gaze flicking over my shoulder to where Ransom stands and she looks far too amused by him for my liking. “Oh wow. What in the name of all things beefcake do we have here?”
“My fiancé,” I’m quick to intervene. “Ransom Courtland Baxter. He’s in charge of vessel security. We’re getting married in a week.” I take a moment to glare at the woman. “Ransom, this is an old fr— acquaintance of mine. We went to high school together, but Merritt has happily haunted my existence far beyond that.”
She takes up his hand and pulls it to her chest. Scratch that, I think she just made sure he rounded second base. Some things never change.
Wes steps over and offers his hand as well. “Captain Weston Crawford. So nice to meet you. I’m a big fan.” He shakes her hand and pauses to look at me. “Did I hear you say you were acquaintances?”
“Oh, come on.” Merritt is quick to wink my way. “We’re much closer than that. Why, we’re practically sisters.”
And apparently, one of us is a liar. too.
“I’m throwing a little bon voyage party in my cabin tonight,” she purrs once again as she looks my way. “I insist you come. In fact,” she waves an arm to the crowd, “I insist everyone come to the party. There will be food and drinks and most of all, me . It’ll be”—she pauses to glare my way before licking her lips at Ransom— “delicious.”
Wes nods her way. “Unfortunately, I’ll have to pass since I’m needed on the bridge at that time. But I’ll make sure the food and beverages are top-notch.”
Tinsley nods, looking more than a little starstruck by the woman. “And I’ll provide the staff. And, of course, I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” She practically leaps onto the woman as she takes up her hand. “I was so obsessed with your latest book, The Boyfriend Rings Twice, that I highlighted no less than half the book. And that plot twist at the end? I never saw it coming.” She gasps. “We should do an impromptu book signing right here on the ship!”
“Of course, we will.” Merritt looks irritated by Tinsley’s enthusiasm. “I’m here, aren’t I? We’ll make it happen. I’ve brought along my agent and a publicist.” She nods to the brunette and blonde respectively.
I knew they were on her payroll.
She lifts her chin as she looks my way before flitting her devilishly deceitful eyes toward Ransom. “We’re going to make a lot of things happen. Get ready to make some waves, big boy.” She sneers my way. “You’ll come, too.”
“Wouldn’t miss it,” I say through gritted teeth.
I am most certainly going to miss it. And so will Ransom if I have anything to say about it.
“Fabulous.” She gives a little wave and strolls off with her entourage trailing behind, leaving me with my mouth slightly agape.
“This”—I say, turning to Elodie—“is one bon voyage party where I wouldn’t mind finding a body.”
Ransom lifts a brow. “Let’s not tempt fate.” He lands a kiss to my lips. “Hey, would you mind if I brought a copy of one of her books to the party with me? That would be amazing to have it signed by the author.”
I guess we’re going after all. Drats.
“That would be something.” I can’t help but frown at the thought. “Of course. Sounds like we’ve just solidified our plans for the night.”
“And we’ve got plans for the rest of this cruise, remember?” he says. “Meeting the kids in Maine, tying the knot once we get back to New York. We’re going to have the time of our lives—for the rest of our lives.”
A smile curls on my lips. “You bet.”
He comes in for another kiss and stops shy. “You don’t see any disembodied beings floating around, do you?”
I give a quick once-over to every last inch my eyes can see and breathe a sigh of relief.
“No,” I say, more than happy to report. “I guess we’ve got that going for us. No ghosts equal no fatalities. And if there’s one thing worse than my ex and my nemesis combined, it’s a corpse showing up just in time for the wedding.”
“That’s not going to happen,” he whispers right over my lips. “You just confirmed it yourself. I’ve got to run down to the office and have a quick briefing with my team. How about I meet you at the party?”
“Sounds good.”
We indulge in a kiss that lingers and holds the promise of all the delicious things to come, especially those waiting for us at the end of this week. Ransom takes off and I glance around once again and shudder as I take in the crowd.
Not a ghost in sight.
Just when I was rooting for the Grim Reaper.
Yet something tells me this is one cruise I’ll never forget—and not for obvious matrimonial reasons.
I’m still rooting for a body and I’ve got two for the Grim Reaper and his minions to choose from.