Chapter Eighteen
A BALL OF ice formed in Rayne’s stomach at those words. Every person involved in a relationship hated to hear them. Feeling as though her world would soon go dark, she gave a slight nod and followed him onto the balcony in silence.
Grant closed the door and led her to the outdoor sofa. He wrapped his hand around hers and squeezed gently. Despite the request to talk, he remained silent for a long moment.
Waiting him out was her only choice. Pushing him would make the discussion more difficult. And the topic was a difficult one. Hopefully, Grant wasn’t thinking of a way to let her down easy. Although she wouldn’t blame him, Rayne wanted a chance at a life with him.
She frowned. Did he know? Was that what prompted this request for a conversation?
Rayne thought back through the past few days, and though she couldn’t pinpoint a time when she’d slipped, Grant was an intelligent man.
He might have figured out she loved him.
Perhaps he wasn’t ready for that much of a commitment.
He cleared his throat. “I need to tell you something before I introduce you to my family.”
She blinked. Those weren’t the words she’d expected. Rayne turned her hand over and threaded her fingers through his. “When you’re ready,” she whispered, then turned her gaze toward the wooded area behind the hotel. Staring at him wouldn’t make the news easier to share.
More minutes passed. Finally, Grant said, “I don’t have a good relationship with my family.”
The ball of ice sitting at the bottom of her stomach melted.
Was this what he wanted to share? She’d already suspected that something was amiss in the relationship with his family.
Just the way he talked about them had tipped her off.
Oh, he was careful not to be disrespectful, but if she had to guess, Rayne would say the courtesy wasn’t returned to him.
“People are in two camps about Special Forces operators and cops. Either they respect you and the job you do or they feel you’re an overpaid thug with a license to abuse and kill.”
“Your family is in the second camp?”
He nodded. “I’m the family black sheep.”
“Join the club,” she murmured. “So am I. So are Elias and Teagan, and the rest of our team. We’re in black ops. People think we’re killers for hire when the opposite is true. We’re sent in to rescue innocents or stop killers and terrorists.”
Grant finally turned to face her. “I didn’t think about my family’s reaction to you when we agreed to date.”
She stilled. “Are you afraid they’ll find out about my father and turn on me, too?”
“Baby, my family will turn on you simply because you’re involved with me.”
“At least you have one. My mother washed her hands of me. In her eyes and the eyes of those in my hometown, I’ll always be the sixteen-year-old teen who killed her father. So, I’ll ask you again. Does it bother you?”
Grant scowled. “I won’t cry any tears over his death.
I’m grateful you could defend yourself against a full-grown and abusive drunk and thank God every day for the rest of my life that you are still alive and hopefully in my arms to share my life.
So, no, his death doesn’t bother me. What would have been a tragedy is if you hadn’t defended yourself and your old man had gone too far and killed you. ”
“My mother says that never would have happened.”
“She’s wrong,” he said flatly. “Dead wrong. From your description, your father was out of control. We were both cops for a long time, Rayne. We’ve walked into domestic violence scenarios just like the one you survived.
If you hadn’t fought back, you and your mother would have been occupying a steel slab in the morgue by the end of that night. I’m glad you killed him.”
The rest of the ball of ice in her stomach melted. She nodded. “Now it’s your turn to listen.”
He motioned for her to go on.
“I don’t care if your family hates my guts. As long as you know and like the real me, nothing else matters.”
Grant chuckled. “Oh, sweetheart, the word like is a pale shadow of what I feel for you.”
Her heart skipped a beat. What did that mean? “Explain. Please.” She tacked on the last, hoping he wouldn’t see how desperately she wanted his feelings to be as deep as hers.
“It’s too soon,” he murmured. “I know it is, but I can’t help how I feel.”
“How do you feel?”
“Can’t you tell, Rayne? I love you down to the depths of my soul.
You are the woman I want to be with the rest of my life, the woman I want to raise a family with, the one I want to grow old with until all we can do is rock on the porch and watch the world go by as we hold hands.
You are the only one for me. The question is, can you live with that? ”
Joy exploded inside Rayne. Live with it?
She wanted to dance in the street and shout the news to the entire world.
“Can you live with the fact that I love you? You’re the man I want to build a life with, the one who’s filled my dreams since the moment I met you.
You’re the man I want to share my life with and build a family with.
Oh, I also want a dog. That’s nonnegotiable. ”
He laughed. “I love dogs.”
“Excellent. Sounds like we’re a perfect match.” Rayne wrapped her arms around his neck. “So, when are we getting married?”
He stared at her for a moment, then a blinding smile curved his mouth. “Say the word, and we’ll go for it.”
“Does it matter if we have a big wedding or a small one?”
“As long as you’re my wife at the end of the ceremony, I don’t care how much pomp and circumstance you want.”
Rayne wrinkled her nose. “How about none? I want a tiny, private wedding with our teammates and a few friends from Fortress. That’s all.”
“Deal. Church or courthouse?”
“Courthouse. We’ll have a party afterward in our backyard.”
“Perfect. Whenever you want, we’ll do it. As soon as we finish this mission, we’ll nail down a date.”
“You really don’t mind having a courthouse wedding with a party afterward?”
He tugged her against his chest. “As long as you’re mine, I don’t care how we get there. Since I’m not a fan of tuxes, I am more than okay with this plan.”
She stood on her tiptoes to kiss him, then eased back. “What’s next?”
“Back to the agenda, knocking down the names on our list so we don’t look like slackers when Riley and Andre report on their names.” Grant sobered. “After that, we’ll face the wrath and disdain of the Bowen clan.”
“Your family may be surprised at our response to their attitudes.”
“Won’t help,” he murmured as he nudged her toward the French door. “Their minds are made up.”
“At least they’ll know we value you and your skills, Grant. We have your back.” If the Bowens thought they could disrespect Grant and not get called on it, they were dead wrong.
She twisted the knob and stepped into the suite with Grant on her heels.
Andre and Riley paused in their work. “Everything all right?” Andre asked, his gaze locked on Grant’s face.
The answer was a brief nod. Once Grant and Rayne returned to their seats on the couch, the operatives resumed their work.
Near the time for them to leave, Riley and Rayne returned to their room to change clothes while Andre and Grant finished the summary documents for their list of names.
Riley tossed her brush back into her bag and turned to face Rayne. “Spill.”
She froze. “About what?”
“Something is up between you and Grant. I can see it all over your face. Since Violet isn’t here to dog you, it’s my job to find out what’s going on and help if I can.”
“You’re so sure something is wrong?”
The computer whiz frowned slightly. “Maybe not, but I know something has changed. Please don’t keep me in suspense.”
“If I tell you, keep it to yourself. No sharing yet.”
Riley’s eyes sparkled. “I promise. Now, spill the news.”
“Grant and I are getting married.”
Her friend squealed, then clamped a hand over her mouth to keep her excitement quiet.
Rayne laughed. “Shh. I want to wait to share the news until Violet and Noah are back from their honeymoon.”
“Sorry. I’m so happy for you and Grant.” Riley hugged her. “This is the best news I’ve had in ages.”
“Really? What about that sweet kiss from Andre earlier in the day? That looked like good news to me, my friend.”
A shrug despite the flush on Riley’s cheeks. “Maybe. We’ll see.”
She sobered. “You’re afraid to trust him.”
“You know my history. Trust doesn’t come easy for me.”
“Give him a chance, Riley. Take it as slow as you need for your comfort.”
A knock sounded on the door. Andre called out, “Everything all right, Riley?”
“Come on. We’d better go before Andre decides he needs to kick down the door to rescue you.” Rayne motioned for her friend to walk out ahead of her. No matter how much Riley claimed she didn’t trust Andre, her face lit up when he walked into a room, and she was attuned to him.
When Riley opened the door, Andre studied her face for a moment, then relaxed his stance. “You’re happy about something.”
“Definitely.”
“Care to share?”
“Nope. The team will hear the good news later.”
“As long as you’re okay, I’ll wait.” He held out his hand for hers. When Riley placed her hand in his, Andre gently tugged her into the living room and toward the door.
Grant watched their friends leave, amusement glittering in the depths of his eyes. “What was that about?”
“I might have told Riley about us.”
“Really? I thought we agreed to wait until Noah and Violet were back.”
“I couldn’t resist. You can trust Riley. She won’t tell a soul.”
He pressed a quick kiss to her mouth, then nudged her toward the hallway. They followed Andre and Riley to the underground garage where the rest of their team waited. Grant slid behind the wheel of the SUV and led the way to his parents’ home.
He parked on the sweeping driveway near the front door. Seth pulled in behind him.
Rayne squeezed his forearm. “We have your back, Grant.”
“Let’s do this,” Andre murmured. He opened the door and reached back to assist Riley from the vehicle.