Chapter 14 Carter
FOURTEEN
CARTER
I swear, I started this game of cat and mouse to gather information, to use it against these boys once the war starts, but slowly, my resolve is breaking when it comes to them.
I’ve been in their house every single day for the last week, and the thought of sneaking around to dig up dirt hasn’t even crossed my mind.
I’m genuinely enjoying my time with them, our dynamic changing each and every day we spend together.
Once the initial shock wore off that I slept with them both – let them fuck me at the same time, as well as in the same night – I realized that running away from something that makes me feel alive wouldn’t serve to please any of us.
Unfortunately, I had to lie to gain their trust, but I have it now, as well as their protection because they barely let me out of their sight, and although I resisted at first, it’s actually nice having people around who care about me for me.
Not because I’m my father’s daughter, or the heiress to the Cassini family, but because they really do see me as my own person, someone worth protecting.
It’s all so new, but they’ve promised to let me work through this at my own pace, and I feel myself becoming more open and comfortable with them as the days pass.
Of course my real identity – and true purpose for being here – is still a secret I intend to keep, but I’ve given them more half-truths of myself than anyone has ever had, and that speaks volumes to the depth of our connection.
I say our connection because I can’t have one without the other.
I’ve developed a deep, emotionally-based relationship with Tyson, our dynamic consisting of trust and acts of service – something else I’m still working on accepting with little to no resistance.
With Jasper, it’s more physical, but equally as strong, even when we’re bickering or threatening each other’s lives, and I’m beginning to see softer sides of him, whether he’s intending to let me that close or not.
One thing’s for certain, I’m finally making choices that benefit me, not the Cassini family as a whole, and it feels good to own the skin I’m living in.
“Carter! There you are. Where the hell have you been?” Ellie asks, darting through the crowd to catch up to me, all heads turning in our direction.
“Sorry, El. I’ve been … busy,” I say, feeling Jasper’s eyes piercing holes through my skin while he waits perched on the hood of his car for me.
“Busy with that?” She nods her head towards Jasper, and I can’t help the girlish smile that cascades across my face.
“And Tyson, his best friend,” I whisper, and her eyes nearly pop out of her head at my confession, a look of pure innocence on her face.
“How does that even … you know what, I don’t want to know. Well, I’m glad you’re happy, but I miss you, roomie,” she laughs, pulling me in for a hug before we get close enough to Jasper, the fear radiating off her as he stares at her with the heat of a thousand suns.
“I’ll come home tomorrow night, I promise!” I call out after her, but just as the words leave my lips, Jasper snakes his arms around me, dragging me back toward his car.
“You will be doing no such thing, my perfect little cuddle bunny. I couldn’t possibly sleep without you,” he groans, kissing my neck as he drops me into the passenger seat.
“I’m not your live-in sex doll, Jasper. I have my own life,” I argue, but he only shakes his head, shutting my door in response.
He’s so stubborn, and loves to bicker with me, but on this, I don’t plan on budging.
Finally having freedom is important to me, and something I’m not giving up, even if it’s minuscule, like spending one or two nights at my own apartment.
“You’re right, Principessina,” he starts, my jaw nearly dropping to the floor as he agrees with me, his hand reaching for mine across the middle console, lacing our fingers together.
“Wait, you’re not going to fight me on this?”
“Nah, I get it. Don’t be surprised if you find me in your bed, though,” he smiles from ear to ear, something I’ve come to learn he only does when he’s being genuine.
“It’d be more likely that I catch you sniffing around my panty drawer, Stalker Boy,” I tease, calling back to when he broke into my apartment, something I don’t plan on letting go of.
Before he can fire back at me, his phone rings, the name flashing across the CarPlay screen indicating that it’s his father, and I hold my breath, realizing that this is the first time he’s gotten a call from the Don while I’m present.
Before I can even wonder if he’s going to answer, or overanalyze if he’s comfortable enough to speak freely around me, he presses the green button, the sound of his father’s voice echoing around the car.
It’s our first test of trust, and to my complete surprise, he sees no issue in unloading the dirty laundry in my presence, but even so, I hold my breath, afraid that any reaction on my face will clue him into the web of lies I’ve intricately woven to hide my interest in his Family.
“Dad,” Jasper sighs, squeezing my hand a little tighter as we park outside the house, a vein popping out of his temple.
Clearly, his dad is a stress trigger for him, and I instinctively climb over the console, sliding into his lap to offer comfort – something I never anticipated being a priority when I first marked him as my target.
He immediately wraps his arms around mid section, my head resting perfectly against his chest, his heart thrashing wildly as his father begins to speak.
“Son, we have new intel, where’s Tyson?” He asks, his voice gruff and short, like talking to his child is a chore, something I know all too well.
It’s not easy being the kid of a mafia Don, their requests always being demands, and the job we’re trained for isn’t easy in the slightest.
Our parents don’t love us, not in the ways average kids experience, only raising us to be cold-blooded killers, assassins, and eventual leaders to command the start of a new cycle.
“I’ll be with him soon. What’s going on?” He tenses, a deep sigh coming from his chest, and I feel so much empathy for him at this moment, all I want to do is help.
Wrapping one hand around his throat, I tilt his head to the side, trailing my tongue along the column of his neck, sucking on his pulse point while his hands grip my hips.
“A new player has teamed up with the Ricci’s, and they’re growing in numbers as the days pass.
Two more men turned up dead this morning, over by the loading docks.
If they get into our shipment routes, we’re done for,” Jasper’s father says, and I feel his breathing intensify, but he doesn’t push me off as I continue to leave love bites on his skin.
“I know, Dad. We won’t let that happen. We still have majority control over all our interests, and nobody has come on my side of town. Tyson did patrols and check-ins all morning with no reports,” he offers, and his dad pauses, likely absorbing his information.
“I don’t like this alliance, not one bit. You and Ty need to pay a few visits to the lower level members of this new crew, remind them who the Masseria’s are.”
“When?”
“Tonight.” With that command, Jasper sits all the way up, kissing me on the cheek as he lifts me off his lap, placing me gently back into the passenger's seat.
“That’s short notice. We don’t even have recon yet,” Jasper argues, but his father cuts him off.
“Then it’s going to be a long night. I expect you to get this done, Son. It’s our family legacy on the line,” he asserts, and I practically wince, having been on the receiving end of that specific line too many times to count.
“Anything else, Dad?”
“No, that’ll be all. Loop Ty in and get a move on,” he says, ending the phone call without even saying goodbye.
The energy in this car has been completely sucked out, the tension at an all time high, but I can’t think of anything to say to help him work through this.
“Fuck!” Jasper shouts, punching the steering wheel as I nearly jump out of my skin, his outburst the last thing I expected.
“Are you okay?” I whisper, reaching out to touch his arm, attempting to ground him back into reality.
“I’m sorry, Carter. My dad brings out the worst in me,” he answers, dragging a hand down his face, the most stressed I’ve ever seen him.
“I thought that was me,” I joke, and a slight smile breaks across his face as he reaches over the middle console, pulling me back into his arms.
“No, not even close. I think … I think you’re forcing the best out of me, like some little witch that cast a spell. You’re good for me, or we’re good for each other,” he confesses, staring down into my eyes, and I know he believes every word he’s saying.
“You’re good for me, too, Jasper. Good in bed. Good at driving me crazy. Good at stalking young college girls,” I tease, and he tilts my chin, placing a quick kiss on my lips before pressing our foreheads together.
“All I heard was good in bed, my perfect little cock slut,” he whispers, lightly biting the tip of my nose as I tangle my hands in his hair, tugging hard at the roots.
“But you’re leaving tonight? For … work, I assume?” I change the subject, not squandering the fact that I just heard some seriously damaging inside information.
“Work, sure, you could call it that. I’m probably going to spend a few hours staking out some men, scare the fuck out of a few more, and then to top it all off, I’ll end up killing them, delivering their heads on a silver platter to ruin some fucking boss’ morning,” he tells me, the irritation growing in his voice as he continues to describe the gory details.
“I thought you liked slicing people open?” I giggle, masking my curiosity with a seemingly innocent question.
Over the last few weeks, Tyson and Jasper haven’t tried to hide what they really do from me, answering my questions with ease, and even though I learned a lot about them from the files I studied, Jasper tends to tell stories, clueing me into just how sick in the head he really is.
Thankfully, I match the darkness that lives inside of him, and can stomach the tall tales of gore and torture.
Although, I’ve found that the most difficult task has been to bite my tongue so as to not to share my own horror stories, like a twisted version of what normal people call bonding.
“I do, but … it’s complicated, Carter. I don’t want to work for my father, or further my family legacy.
I just want … to live a normal life. I’d be content if I never watched the light drain out of someone’s eyes again.
I’ve taken enough bodies off this Earth,” he says, the pain in his voice ever-present, and I press my lips to his, tears threatening to fall down my cheeks at his words.
Before I got to know this big, macho mafia prince, I never would’ve imagined that I’d relate to him so deeply, but we’ve lived the same life, walked in the same pair of shoes, and in this moment, all I want is to confess that I feel the same fucking way.
Sometimes, I want to run and hide from my own legacy, to let it all burn to the ground while I watch from somewhere far enough away from the carnage, but I can’t.
Similarly, I can’t say what would bring Jasper and I closer together, what could link us in ways nobody else understands, because I’m lying to him.
Admittedly, I haven’t felt an ounce of guilt about that fact until this very second, and it hits in a way I never imagined because it actually bothers me.
It hurts all the way down to my bones to lie to him, to feel guilty about my deception, and my head is fucking spinning.
“What’s the matter, Carter?” Jasper asks, concern painted on his face as he strips me from the inner workings of my mind.
“Nothing. Nothing, I just wish that dream could come true for you.” I stammer, hoping to distract him from my emotional moment – another lie I had to tell – and for now, it works.
“One day. Ty and I have thought about it since we were kids, and one day, we’ll make it a reality. With you by our side now, anything’s possible.” He kisses me once more, with a little extra passion this time, replacing the guilt with lust, my belly fluttering as he parts my lips with his tongue.
“Not in the car, Jasper,” I say softly, looking up at him through my lashes, and a sinister smile breaks out on his face, one that lets me know exactly what I’m in for.
Sex – that’s all this is.
It’s the worst lie I’ve ever told, but for now, I need to force myself to believe it in order to stay with them, to stay in their circle of trust, and most importantly, to stay alive.