Chapter Twenty-Eight Lor Present Day
Nadir and I eventually cave to sleep, and I awake to the warmth of sunlight filtering into the room. We didn’t get around to closing the curtains last night, and I cover my eyes from the assault of brightness, shifting under the blanket, snuggling deeper into our cozy cocoon. It’s so comfortable with his arm wrapped around me, his mouth gently parted with soft, sleepy breaths.
My eyes take in the regal lines of his face as the ominous words I recalled in the haze of near unconsciousness spin into the front of my thoughts.
Heartbreak and ruin.
Another recollection jogs my memory. Something that Rhiannon said.
Sometimes I think it was their love that burned down the world, which in a way is almost romantic, I think?
While it seems farfetched, I can’t help but see these pieces arrange themselves in the jumble of my mind’s scope. What if that’s what caused the breaking?
The Mirror alluded to it, too, when I stood before it.
This can never happen again.
I hadn’t understood what those words meant at the time, but I wonder if I do now.
I shake my head, attempting to dislodge the stones piling up in my thoughts. Whatever happens, we’re going to find a way around or through anything fate can throw in our path. If there’s some catch to sealing our bond, then we’ll find someone who can help us. I don’t care what I must do to make that happen.
My singular goal for so long was to exact my revenge on the Aurora King, but my desires and wants have broadened, spreading like water over cracked, parched earth, nourishing the dead ground under my feet. I want more than just the cold hard need to make him pay for everything. Despite the rage that fueled me for years, I want more than that, and I think I’m slowly learning to accept that I deserve it.
When you’ve been treated like nothing for most of your life, it’s easy to forget that you’re something.
I continue studying Nadir’s face, tracing the lines of his nose and his cheeks. I once said he isn’t attractive in the traditional sense—he’s far too extraordinary for that. But he’s so achingly beautiful that I could lie here all day memorizing every fascinating detail.
The plan is to return to Aphelion today, but we’re no closer to figuring out how Atlas or Rion knew about my origins. This ever-present unknown congeals in my stomach, burning like acid. I feel vulnerable and exposed and wary of everyone. Whom can I really trust?
My gaze falls on Nadir, and in spite of everything, I smile to myself, because, in him, I finally trust.
“How long do you plan to stare at me, Lightning Bug?” Nadir says with his eyes still closed, making me jump. “I understand how devastatingly good-looking I am, but this is getting a little awkward.”
I shove his shoulder, and his eyes snap open before he grins.
“How long have you been awake?” I demand as he pulls me closer while I attempt to shove him away.
“Long enough to know that you were swooning over me.”
“I was not,” I say, but it’s so obvious I’m lying that I can’t even pretend to be serious.
He nuzzles into my neck, his hand sliding down my back to where he finds my ass and squeezes it firmly. “You can’t fool me. I know how much you want me, even when you were working so damn hard to pretend otherwise.”
I snort, but he’s already kissing me as he rolls me over, pinning me to the mattress.
“Are you sore?” he asks, his hand sliding down my stomach and across my hip, his touches like tender kisses.
“A little,” I admit.
“Hmm,” he says, his fingers dipping into the space between my thighs. “And yet, you’re dripping for me.”
“I can be both things. They aren’t mutually exclusive occurrences,” I say, and he grins as he gently massages my clit. He leans down and sucks on my neck, carefully and lovingly bringing me to the edge until I shatter underneath him again. I wonder if you can go blind from orgasming this often?
When he’s finished, he rolls away and then scoops me up, carrying me to the bathroom, where we spend another solid hour in the shower “cleaning up.”
Once we finally emerge from the haze of steam and a heady rainbow of orgasms, I find a note under the door inviting us for breakfast with Cedar and Elswyth before we depart.
Nadir comes up behind me, wrapping his arms around me and kissing my shoulder. “I was hoping we could stay in this room, just the two of us, until the end of time,” he says, reading the note. “But I suppose we have shit to get accomplished.”
I look over my shoulder and arch an eyebrow. “And here I thought vengeance was the foundation of your personality and not just a side hobby you’d abandon at the first opportunity for a roll in the sheets.”
He lets out a low growl and spins me around, backing me towards the bed, and tipping me over as he lands on top. “My need for vengeance is fully intact. Never doubt that.”
Then he peppers me with kisses as his fingers find all of my ticklish spots, and I dissolve into a fit of giggles.
This feels really… nice.
When he’s done torturing me, he pulls up and catches something in my expression.
“What is it?” he asks.
“Nothing. I just… I like this.” My hand settles against his cheek, my thumb pressing his bottom lip, as his mouth crooks up at the corner. He nips my finger with his teeth, and I snatch it away with a laugh.
“This is everything,” he says.
Finally, we manage to dress and head to the dining room with our fingers laced together. We’ve walked like this before. We spent most of our time in the Keep holding hands, but its significance has shifted. This isn’t for show anymore, and now that we’ve declared ourselves to each other, it means something else. It’s such a small, innocuous action, but it strikes me as momentous.
We round the corner to find Tristan, Mael, and Etienne already seated with the Woodlands King and Queen.
“Finally,” Mael says. “I thought we were going to have to send out a search party for you. What happened last n—”
His eyes drop to our clasped hands and then flick back up as a beaming grin crosses his face. He slaps the table with enough force to rattle the glasses and cutlery.
“You finally fucked,” he declares, and I feel my face turn beet red. Especially when Tristan sits up, glowering at Mael and then at me and Nadir like he’s not sure what he’s supposed to do but knows he definitely wants to do something about this.
“Good gods, Mael,” I say, covering my eyes. “Can you ever behave like a normal person?”
He smiles and shrugs. “For me, this is normal.”
“That would be the problem,” Nadir says as he leads me into the room and then pulls out a chair next to Mael for me. As I sit, I nail him with a withering glare, but he couldn’t care less, grinning at me and then at his friend.
“Maybe now you won’t be so fucking moody all the time,” Mael says, and Nadir smiles.
“You can certainly hope.”
Cedar and Elswyth are now watching all of us with bemused looks on their faces.
“I’m sorry,” I say, not entirely sure what I’m apologizing for, but this is the height of embarrassment. “He’s not fully housebroken yet.”
“I suppose,” Elswyth says, tipping her head with a coy tilt to her mouth, “congratulations are in order?”
My face scorches as Nadir’s hand lands on my thigh and squeezes it.
“Thank you,” he replies as I drop my face into my hands in mortification. Did he just accept a congratulations… for sex?
Nadir chuckles softly, leaning against me before he drops a kiss on my shoulder. I look up, planning to tell him to stop, but he’s staring at me with such adorable reverence that I don’t have the heart.
“Can we talk about something else, please?” I ask instead.
“You have a mark on your neck,” Tristan says, zeroing in on me, his eyes narrowing. “Like someone was sucking on you.”
I slap my hand over my skin, sure the tips of my ears are about to incinerate. Oh gods, we should have just stayed in my room. Mael snorts out a laugh, and even Etienne cracks a rare smile.
“Tris!” I hiss. “Stop it.” My eyes dart around the table, and I sit up straight, trying to pretend I have some control over what’s happening right now. “A gentleman wouldn’t draw attention to it.”
He rolls his eyes. “Then don’t let random dickheads suck on your neck, little sister.”
He raises a hand and bumps his fist with Mael’s as they both laugh.
“Seriously, though,” Tristan says, turning to Nadir, the smile dropping from his face. “Hurt her, and I’ll kill you. Just… absolutely destroy you, Aurora Prince.”
Nadir raises an eyebrow, and I expect him to say something cocky and irreverent, but instead, he dips his chin. “I wouldn’t expect anything less. You have my word that I will never, ever do anything to hurt her. I love her more than you can possibly understand.”
Their gazes meet, and some kind of testosterone-induced understanding passes between them. It would be nice if they got along better, though I’m not really caring for this overt display of male aggression.
“If you two are done acting like I’m a piece of furniture to be discussed, can we please talk about something else?”
I turn to Cedar, who’s studying me curiously.
“You two,” he says, his finger flicking between us. “The Aurora Prince and the Primary of Heart?”
Gods. Is this the only topic of conversation we can come up with this morning? Surely we have more important things to discuss?
“We’re…” I say, not sure how to continue that thought, when I’m temporarily rescued by a low rumble that shakes the table and the ground beneath us. We all reach out to steady our glasses as we wait for the quake to subside.
“Has that been happening a lot?” Nadir asks, and Cedar answers with a grim nod.
“More and more.”
“The trees,” I ask. “We saw them on our way in. How long have they been that way?”
“A few months,” the king replies.
“And you have no idea what’s causing this?” Nadir asks.
“None at all,” Cedar says. “Do you?”
“No,” Nadir replies. “At first, I’d hoped it was just the natural ebb and flow of the environment…”
He trails off, and it’s becoming obvious it’s more than that.
“Anyway,” Nadir says, picking up the thread of our previous conversation. “We’re mates.”
Etienne drops his fork with a clatter on his plate before it bounces off and then lands on the floor with another clatter.
Elswyth leans forward, her eyes wide. “Is it true?”
I shrug, suddenly feeling incredibly self-conscious.
“Mates?” Tristan asks. “What does that mean?”
“It means she’s stuck with me,” Nadir says, his usual expression reserved for Tristan back in place. “Which I guess means you are, too.”
“I don’t know what that means.” My brother is understandably confused.
“It’s a thing that happens sometimes,” I say, waving a hand.
“Not sometimes,” Cedar says. “It’s incredibly rare. Your grandparents…”
“I know,” I say. “Someone told me that they were. You knew?”
He nods. “Wolf told me before they left for Heart when they…”
“Blew everything up,” I say.
“This is remarkable,” Elswyth says. “So all this time, you were right under each other’s noses.” She clasps her hands together. “How romantic.”
I exchange a look with Nadir. I wish we had more time to talk about this and explore its many layers.
“I’m very glad you came here,” Cedar says. “It seems that destiny has something very big in store for both of you and fate meant for our paths to cross after all these years. I meant what I said about offering my allegiance, Lor. I’ve always felt that the loss of Heart was a detriment to Ouranos. Your queendom’s healing magic was an invaluable asset, and we will never be as safe without it.”
“Thank you,” I say. “You don’t know how much that means to me.”
“I’m sorry for everything,” Cedar says. “I should have tried harder to find you. The guilt has sat with me ever since that day.”
I shake my head. “None of it was your fault,” I say, meaning it. He had no obligation to protect us, and I’ve spent enough time blaming myself. There is no one responsible for anything that happened other than Rion himself.
After all the years of yearning, we have a sort of family again. I wonder at the sincerity in Cedar’s heart, but I want to give him the benefit of the doubt. I’ve spent so long mistrusting everyone that I also want to break down those walls for my own sake. This anger I’ve clutched in my heart will consume me if I don’t find some way to release it.
“Still. I should have tried,” Cedar says as he looks at Tristan, perhaps seeking his absolution. My brother is less inclined to trust or forgive right now, and I don’t blame him. He needs more time, and he’s entitled to as much as he wants.
“Thank you for welcoming us,” Tristan says, leaving the rest unspoken, but it’s clear from Cedar’s expression that he understands there are bridges yet to mend.
“It was truly the least we could do,” Elswyth says, laying a hand on the king’s arm. “You have a home here any time you need it.”
“Thank you,” I add.
“I never thought I’d see the day The Woodlands would be working with The Aurora,” Cedar says to Nadir, leaning forward. “This is quite a turn of history.”
“Well, I’m not officially The Aurora yet,” Nadir replies, and Cedar nods.
“I’ve never liked your father. Just so you know.”
My eyes widen as I look between them, but Nadir grins. “You are far from the only one, Your Majesty.”
Cedar belts out a warm laugh before he turns to me. “Before you leave, is there anything else I can do? Just say the word.”
“Actually,” I reply, because there is something.
Nadir and I discussed it this morning in our sex-drunk daydream and agreed this made sense in our quest for answers. “I wonder if you’d let me see the Woodlands Staff?”