13. Evelyn
13
Evelyn
I wasn’t sure why I was awake, but my stomach had clear priorities.
Hugging my blanket around my shoulders, I padded into the kitchen, flinching when the cold tile met my bare feet. The fridge bathed the room in a dim glow as I rummaged through it, hoping for something vaguely snack-worthy.
“Busted.”
I yelped, spinning around to find Chad perched on the counter, feet swinging lazily. His smirk was pure trouble, but his eyes—warm and steady—locked onto mine.
“What the hell, Puppy?” I clutched my chest. “Are you just lurking in dark kitchens for fun now?”
“Obviously,” he replied. “It’s part of my charm. Also, you talk to yourself when you dig through the fridge. It’s adorable.”
I narrowed my eyes. “I do not.”
“Mm-hmm.” He jumped down, stealing the jar of peanut butter I had just grabbed. “Also, you missed the real jackpot.”
I blinked as he reached into the cabinet above the fridge, pulling down a stash of contraband snacks—chips, cookies, doughnuts, and a suspicious-looking bag of something that looked like marshmallow cotton candy.
My jaw dropped. “You’ve been holding out on me?”
Chad gasped dramatically. “Would I do that to you, little witch?”
“Yes.”
“Okay, fair,” he said, handing me a doughnut. “But in my defense, I was saving it for a special occasion.”
“And now qualifies?”
He shrugged. “You’re here. Feels special enough to me.”
The lightness in his tone didn’t match the way he was watching me like he was memorizing every second of this moment.
I softened, taking a bite of my doughnut. “So, what’s the real reason you’re awake?”
He hesitated, then nudged me toward the counter, hopping up next to me. “Just thinking.”
I nudged him back. “Dangerous.”
He grinned, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.
I waited, letting the silence stretch before asking softly, “Thinking about what?”
Chad exhaled, running a hand through his hair. “Just. Everything.”
His usual smirk was gone, replaced by something quieter, more thoughtful.
I waited a beat, watching him. When he didn’t say more, I softened my voice. “You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”
He exhaled, rubbing a hand over the back of his neck. “Yeah, I know. There’s just a lot happening right now.”
I nodded, “Yeah, it’s been overwhelming.” I said, then asked, “But what about you?”
His brow furrowed. “What about me?”
I turned to face him fully. “You’re always looking out for everyone, making sure we laugh even when things are awful. But what do you need, Chad? What can I give you?”
His lips parted slightly. Then, he laughed—a quiet, breathless sound. “Damn, little witch. Way to ruin my whole strategy of never dealing with my feelings.”
I didn’t laugh this time. I reached for his hand, squeezing it lightly. “I mean it.”
He swallowed, his fingers tightening around mine. “I don’t know,” he admitted, voice quieter than I’d ever heard. “I guess…I just want to know I matter. That if I wasn’t cracking jokes, if I wasn’t the guy who made you laugh—you’d still want me around.”
I felt my heart crack a little.
“Chad,” I murmured, shifting closer. “You’re not just the funny one. You’re the one who makes things feel okay when they aren’t. I mean it. You’ve always been there for me, Chad, from the very beginning. You were the first person I truly felt safe with.”
His breath hitched slightly.
I pressed on. “I wouldn’t have made it through without you. You didn’t judge me—you saw me. You knew I wasn’t okay, even when I tried to hide it. You made me feel safe before I knew what safety felt like.”
His fingers curled around mine, his grip firm like he needed to hold onto something.
“And I’m sorry,” I whispered. “If I ever made you feel like I don’t see you the way you see me. But I do. I always have. I continued, “ Chad, I need you. Not just for your jokes, not just for the light you bring to everyone else. I need you.”
For a long moment, he didn’t speak. Then he exhaled, resting his forehead lightly against mine.
“You have me,” he murmured, cupping my head and kissing my forehead. “Always.”
I smiled at him. “Even if you never told another joke, I’d still love you, Chad. With all my heart.”
“I love you too, little witch, more than you’ll ever know.”
I smiled and squeezed his hand before nudging him. “Come on, let’s go to bed and cuddle.”
Chad perked up instantly, mischief flickering back into his eyes. “Can I be the small spoon?”
I laughed, shaking my head. “Of course you can.”