Chapter 20
Katem
I give my back to Piper, but it does not stop me from picturing what she will look like without her coverings.
The memory of Remi’s body is vague, but even if I could clearly recall every detail, none of them will be able to compare to my keeshla.
She is beyond pleasing to my eyes with coverings on. She will only be more so without them.
My mind is curious to know what these underclothes are that she says she will swim in.
Why do humans need to wear two layers of coverings?
I can understand why they would do so during the cold season, but during the warm one?
What purpose do they serve? None of the mated males have mentioned their mates wearing coverings beneath their coverings.
Perhaps this is knowledge only mates are supposed to have.
It is meant to be private between them. I will ask Piper once she has stepped into the water.
The sound of her footsteps in the river reaches me, as does the hiss she makes, and I resist the urge to turn until she gives me permission. The humans’ need for privacy while naked still confuses me, but we have all come to accept it.
“Okay, you can turn around.”
I do so and find Piper standing with her arms crossed so the crests of her chest mounds are visible over the water’s surface. She shivers slightly.
“You are cold.” I move to guide her out of the water, but she stops it.
“I’ll be fine once my body gets used to the temperature.” She does not sound certain.
Trusting that my mate knows of what she speaks, I do not push. Already she is worried I will treat her differently because she is…no, I will not think of it. There will time later to do so. Now, we swim.
“All right. Show me what you know.”
Piper nibbles her bottom lip. “I don’t know anything.
In fact, I’m about two seconds from a complete panic attack, because I’ve never been in water this deep before and I’m kind of freaking out that I’m standing here because I can feel the water rising up and over my head even though I know it’s not, but that’s what it—shit, shit, shit. ”
She clings to me as my arms wrap around her and I lift her a small amount out of the water. “Breathe, keeshla. I have you.”
The heat of her cunt sears into me and the hard centers of her chest mounds poke into my flesh through the thin material of her second chest covering.
“Fuck, I didn’t think it would be this hard,” Piper says, her breath a soft caress against my neck. “I mean, we haven’t even done anything but stand here and already, I freaked out.”
“It is common to be nervous when attempting a task you have never done before. There is no shame in that.”
She lifts her head slightly. “What have you ever been nervous about that you hadn’t done before?”
“Mouth touching my mate.”
Her cheeks darken. “Oh.”
“I have seen nearly all the mated couples do this thing and yet, when it came time for me to mouth touch with my own keeshla, my hands trembled. I knew I would be so terrible, she would hate it.”
Piper grins. “She doesn’t hate it.”
I match her grin. “I am glad for this. Hopefully she will feel the same when the time comes for her to share my furs. That is another thing I am nervous about.” My smile fades. “What if I do it wrong? What if I do not please her? Worse, what if I hurt her?”
“You’re not going to do it wrong and if you…make love the same way you kiss, I will be much more than pleased. I’ve also heard it always hurts the first time, but only a little and only that once,” she says.
“Our mating will hurt you?” There is horror in my voice.
“Well, I don’t really know.” Piper shrugs. “It’s just what I’ve heard. Maybe they were wrong and it doesn’t hurt everyone. It will be fine, though. I promise, so you don’t have to be worried.”
After hearing this, I will do nothing but worry, but I do not share this concern with her, because in this time and place, she needs me to be confident and show her that it is all right to be nervous. She will conquer her fears, because my mate is strong.
“Let us both push our worries aside then. I will not worry about hurting you and you will not worry about swimming. There is nothing to fear while I am holding you.” I stare into Piper’s eyes. “Do you trust me?”
“Of course.” Her answer is immediate and without hesitation.
“Then trust me to keep you safe here in the water.”
She swallows, but finally nods.
“I will hold you, but I want us to go beneath the water’s surface for a single beat. Are you able to do that?”
“I th…think so,” Piper says.
“Take a breath right before and hold it while we are under. I promise it will only be for one beat of our hearts. Ready? Breathe.”
Together we inhale and I lower us until we are completely submerged and in an instant, I straighten and we are above the surface.
My mate sputters and swipes her hair back off her face with a single hand while still holding tightly to me with the other.
Her eyes open and droplets cling to the tiny hairs that surround them.
Her mouth curls broadly and she shows me her teeth. “I did it.”
“Yes, you did. Well done, keeshla. Again?”
Piper nods.
I lose track of how many times we go under the water, each time staying a little longer. She has grown far more confident in my arms.
“Once more and then we will stop for this turn. Already I can scent the midday meal and your skin is shriveling in an unhealthy way. Is this natural for humans?” I am angry with myself for not noticing it before.
She laughs. “It’s perfectly normal when we stay in water for any long length of time.”
I do not understand humans and the things their bodies do. “I will trust you in this. All right, hold your breath.”
We breathe in at the same time and back under we go.
Not two beats of my heart pass when Piper coughs, which forces her to suck in air.
Only it is water she brings in. Quickly I rush us up to the surface and out of the river onto the bank.
She coughs and chokes while the fear inside me explodes into terror unlike anything I have ever felt.
All the prior training I have had for when this happens to any of the kits goes straight out of my head.
Focus, Katem. I pause and make my mind work.
At last, what I need to do comes. I clap Piper on the back between the bones that bracket her spine many times, trying to be gentle, but also needing to help her expel the water.
She coughs out much liquid. Her skin has turned a shade I have never seen before, and she clings to me as if I am her lifeline.
Piper coughs a few more times, bringing up small amounts of water still with it and spitting it out until she has expelled it all and her breaths are raspy.
She shivers in my arms, and I quickly grab her chest covering from the pile next to where we sit and help her place it over her head.
I continue to hold her, hoping that my body heat will help warm her, all while I speak softly and reassure her that she is well.
Perhaps before long my heart will slow its frantic pace.
“That didn’t go as planned,” Piper croaks out.
“No, it did not.” If it is up to me, we will never do this again.
“Maybe we can try again in a few days.”
Because there is nothing I can deny her, I nod. “If that is what you wish.”
She lifts her head. “You’re not going to attempt to talk me out of it?”
“Could I?”
Piper hesitates. “Maybe.”
I push the wet strands of hair off her face. “Why do you wish to know how to swim?”
She blows out a breath. “It’s silly.”
“There are no silly reasons for wanting to increase your knowledge or learn a new skill. I think many of us could benefit from not being afraid to try a thing we have never done before. I am proud of you for having the courage to do these things on your list.”
Piper leans in and kisses me. “Thank you for being you.”
“You are most welcome.” I grin. “Now, tell me why you wish to learn swimming.”
“Because it makes me feel like I’m not part of the bottom tier,” she finally says.
“The people who live in the upper tier have stupid amounts of credits. More than they could ever need. With them, they buy the most beautiful—if, ridiculous—items, including these things called infinity pools I once saw a picture of. If I could learn how to swim, then I could imagine I was one of those rich people. And if I was rich, then maybe I could afford fancy doctors and maybe I wouldn’t be dying. ”
My heart aches fiercely for Piper. “Whether you are from the upper or bottom tier, it is a skill every person should have. No matter the reason you put it on your list, it will be a task I help you accomplish if that is your wish.”
She nods. “When Maeve and I were here earlier, Graham nearly fell in and the first thing that crossed my mind was that I would have been helpless in the situation. Having cancer makes me feel helpless enough. I don’t need anything else to make it worse.”
“When you are ready to try again, you need only tell me.”
The wind blows stronger and Piper shivers.
“Come, let us put our coverings back on and return to our tent. I will get a fire going and then bring us something to eat while we warm ourselves.”
“That sounds good.”
I assist my mate to her feet and while we both step into our leg coverings, I keep a close watch on her, because I do not like her coloring or the way her teeth make noise.
We pause at the nenuphar bush so that Piper can retrieve her cloth foot covering.
As we walk toward the village center and in the direction of our tent, her breath sounds change.
At long last, we arrive at our tent. I guide her inside and toward our furs.
“I will start the fire while you change into dry coverings.”
“Okay.”
From right outside the entrance, I pick up several pieces of wood and place them in the shallow pit in the center of the tent, along with a few twigs.
Using the rocks kept nearby, I strike them together to create the spark needed to light.
It takes several tries, but eventually, the wood smokes and a tiny flame catches.
I fan it to encourage its growth until at last, the flame builds as does the heat it produces.
I glance over at Piper and find that she is wearing her new coverings and has also wrapped herself in a fur.
Still, she shivers. I lift her in my arms and move closer to the pit.
With her safely in my embrace, I lower us so we sit a safe distance from the fire, but close enough to feel its warmth.
She remains seated on my lap with her head tucked under my chin.
“This is nice,” she says.
“Are you getting warm?”
She nods. “Uh huh.”
“Good.”
We remain like that until Piper’s body stops trembling, and yet I do not release her.
I have told her that this is the path Deeka has laid out for us, and yet, I grow angry.
Whether it is at our goddess or whichever deity the humans worship, I do not know.
I am angry for my mate. For the fear she feels.
The helplessness. The worries she carries, because there are many.
I glance down at the top of her head and make a vow that from this turn forth, I will be the one to carry them for her.