Chapter 9 #2
My chest squeezed at her admission. I felt the same way, but I couldn’t go there.
I couldn’t lie to her. I took a deep breath and tipped her chin up with my hand.
“I’m going to be honest with you, Addison.
The way you can’t do casual is the way I can’t do relationships.
This is all I can really offer you. You’re also a client, a big one at that, and I don’t want things to get complicated.
” She nodded and looked away, and it fucking killed me to let her down like this.
I turned her face back toward me. “You’re gorgeous and incredible. I love spending time with you, but I have to be honest about what I can give you.”
She forced a smile across her pretty face that didn’t reach her eyes. “Thanks for being honest with me. You’re a good guy, Dean. I know we’ve crossed a line already, but can we at least try to still be friends?”
I nodded as she climbed off my lap, which made my dick pitch a fit. “Of course. We’d better still be friends. You’re my only friend here,” I teased.
As I climbed out of her car so I could take a much-needed cold shower, the front door opened and out strutted Harper and Archer.
They both looked up and spotted me, stopping dead in their tracks.
Harper was wearing what I was pretty positive was my brother’s T-shirt with just-fucked hair, while Archer was wearing a smug-ass look on his face.
“Are you fucking kidding me, Arch?” I crossed my arms against my chest, rolling my eyes.
Addison popped out of the driver’s side of her car. “I see that the headache must have gone away, Harp.” Addison chuckled.
A wide grin spread across Harper’s face, and she flipped her long blonde hair over her shoulder.
“Yup, feeling much better now.” She turned back toward Archer and stood up on her toes, kissing him on the cheek and then walking toward Addison.
“Well, this worked out. Now you can take me home with you, Addi. Good timing.” Addison just shook her head, laughing as Harper opened the door to the SUV and got into the passenger seat.
“Catch ya later, Adler boys!” Harper waved and shut the door.
Addison waved and smiled back at us before disappearing into her car.
Archer and I stood there watching them make their way down the driveway and disappear into the night. I turned back toward him and punched him in the arm. “Couldn’t keep your dick in your pants just this once? You’ve been here for all of one day, asshole.”
He rubbed his arm, laughing.
“Calm your shit, brother. Don’t be jealous that you can’t close the deal.” He smirked as I shoved his ass through the front door back into the house.
I had my back turned, making some eggs, when I heard Archer pull out a barstool and sit down at the island counter.
“You ready to tell me what happened with you and Addison last night?” Archer asked while taking a sip of the coffee I pushed toward him.
I leaned back against the counter, sipping my coffee, crossing my legs at the ankle. “We hooked up at the bar, made out in the car, I asked her to come inside, she said she didn’t do casual, I said I didn’t do relationships, and my night ended with a cold shower.”
Archer barked out a laugh. “Wow, thanks for the thirty-second synopsis of your evening.”
“Yeah, well, there isn’t much more to tell. We decided just to remain friends.” I turned back to the stove, turned it off, and plated our breakfast. I pushed his plate in front of him and took the barstool next to him.
“Your night did not go as I expected. How the hell did that even happen?” I asked as I forked some scrambled eggs into my mouth.
“Harper is a cool chick and hot as hell. We got to talking when you and Addison abandoned us for your bathroom hookup, and we actually have a lot in common,” he said around a mouthful of food. “She clearly found me equally as hot, and one thing led to another.” He shrugged.
“So, what was with the she-had-a-headache bullshit? Why not just tell me that you left to go hook up at my house?” I laughed, taking a sip of coffee.
“She didn’t want Addison to know, and we thought I’d have her back to Addison’s place by the time you guys came home.” A smug smile spread across his face. “But let’s just say that things lasted a little longer than we expected.”
This guy.
I rolled my eyes. “Why didn’t she want Addison to know?”
“She said Addison really likes you, and Harper didn’t want to complicate things for her or add any unnecessary drama by her having knowledge of us hooking up.”
I nodded. I really liked Addison too, but I just couldn’t go there.
“Makes sense. Well, cat’s out of the bag now with that walk of shame.” I chuckled.
Archer nodded and smiled. “Sure is, and I hope I get to do it again.”
A week had passed since everything had gone down with Addison, and I hadn’t heard from her much, not that I should really be surprised, given how we left things. Sure, we agreed to be friends, but part of me thought Addison only agreed to that to appease me…and to get me the fuck out of her car.
Between work and having Archer in town, I kept busy. Probably checked my phone way too much, like the needy bastard that I was, just hoping she would reach out. But no such luck. When I got home from the office, I finally broke down and sent her a text.
Hey, James, are we okay?
A whole fucking twenty-five minutes passed—and honestly, it felt more like three hours—before she finally responded.
Addison:
Hey, yeah, of course. Sorry I haven’t texted in a while, been pretty busy with Harper in town.
Okay, just checking. Speaking of Harper, Archer suspiciously stole my truck a couple of times this past week, late at night. You wouldn’t happen to know if he went and got Harper, would you?
Addison:
Funny you should say that. I caught her a couple of times leaving my place late. Those two have spent quite a bit of time together.
Lol, they are terrible at sneaking around. Arch must like her. He’s usually a one-and-done type of guy.
Addison:
Yeah, I think they like each other. Guys don’t usually hold Harper’s attention for this long. I’ll keep you posted on what I know. She left today, so we’ll see if this continues now that she’s back in Boston.
Yes, please keep me in the loop because God knows if my brother will. He agreed to stay through Thanksgiving, so he’s here a little longer.
Addison:
That’s great. Enjoy your time together. Maybe now he won’t be as distracted with Harper gone, lol.
One can hope.
Addison didn’t further the conversation, and I didn’t know what else to say to her either.
I missed her. I missed our flirty banter back and forth.
I missed taking it too far and seeing her reaction, seeing how easily I got under her skin.
I missed spending time with her, but clearly we couldn’t go there after everything that had gone down between us.
Frustrated, I changed into a pair of joggers, a T-shirt, and my running shoes. I needed to do something to work through all of this shit in my head. Coal jumped to his feet when he saw me grab his leash. I threw on my hat backwards and headed out the door with him.
Coal and I found a nice rhythm as we hit our second mile.
He loved going on runs, and I forgot how much running helped clear my head.
Addison had me fucked up. When we got back from our four-mile run, Coal ran inside and beelined to his water bowl, thirsty and exhausted.
I headed to the gym that I’d created in one of my spare rooms and threw myself into a grueling weight circuit to keep my mind focused on anything other than her.
I worked out until every muscle in my body was burning, but my mind kept drifting to Addison.
No matter what I did, I couldn’t focus on anything but her, and I didn’t know what the fuck to do about that.
After I got out of the shower, I made my way to the kitchen to start prepping dinner. Archer was already there, grabbing himself a beer when he saw me walk in.
“Hey, where’d you come from?” He reached back into the fridge to grab another beer and handed it to me. I popped the top off and clinked my bottle against his before taking a long swig.
“Took Coal on a run and then worked out in my gym for a while. You good with burgers for dinner tonight?” I walked toward the pantry to grab some chips.
“Yeah, sounds good. What’s going on? You seem sad or pissed off, I can’t tell which.” He cocked his head to the side, assessing me.
I sighed heavily. “Probably a bit of both at this point. All this shit with Addison is fucking with my head.” I moved toward the fridge to grab everything to make the burgers and then laid it all out on the counter.
“What’s going on there? Anything change?” Archer asked while popping a chip into his mouth.
“Nah, I friend zoned her because I’m a dumbass that can’t get over my own bullshit.” I walked out to the back patio to turn the grill on. Archer followed behind me.
“I’ve gotta ask. Why did you friend zone her? You seem to really like her. Does any of this have to do with the Margot bullshit?”
“Of course it does. I can’t go through that shit again,” I snapped.
Archer held his hands up. “I got it. Chill. But Addison isn’t Margot, not even remotely close.
You shouldn’t let something that happened years ago dictate your entire future, brother.
I see the way you look at the girl. Are you seriously going to just let her go?
Can you handle some other dude coming in and dating her?
It’s a small town. You will see it soon enough, and right in front of your face, if you don’t do something about it. ”
I stood there for a moment, taking it all in. “No, I’d probably fuck up any guy that goes near her.” I scrubbed a hand down my face with a sigh. “But I just don’t know that I can do a relationship again, Arch. It nearly killed me once.”
Archer nodded in understanding. “I get it. Trust me, I do. I’ve never been about getting close to a woman, and I understand that trusting other people’s intentions is difficult, given our family.
But I think we both know that you trust Addison and don’t believe she’s into you for your name or money, so what else is stopping you from dating her? ”
I sighed, feeling uncomfortable with what I was about to admit.
“This town loves Addison and her family. What if we end in a bad breakup? It could mess up my entire reputation and hurt my practice. If I’m not successful here, I have no choice but to start over somewhere else or go back home.
I don’t want to risk that, and I especially don’t want to hurt Addison. ”
Archer took a pull from his beer before responding.
“I know growing up how we did has created some trust issues for you. But, Dean, when are you going to realize you’re enough on your own?
Not because of your money, or your name, or who you’re dating.
You need to trust that your work ethic, knowledge, and skill set are what will keep your patients coming back, not your relationship with Addison.
You are a damn good doctor.” He placed his hand on my shoulder and squeezed.
“And sometimes you change everything, your plan, what you thought you knew, when a game changer comes along.”
I studied him for a moment. “Are we talking about Addison or Harper?” I smirked.
Archer smiled and took another pull from his beer, ignoring my question. “I’m just saying, I think Addison could be a game changer for you.” And with that, he grabbed the spatula out of my hand and started flipping the burgers.
In true Archer fashion, instead of providing clarity, he just stirred up more questions, more doubts, and more reasons to wonder if walking away from Addison would be the biggest mistake of my life.