Chapter 36
MATEO
The locker room was filled with noise, but I heard none of it.
On either side of me, Jake and Perry talked away, but it went in one ear and out the other.
I stared down at my phone in my hand. It buzzed with incoming messages from my family wishing me luck.
But the one message I truly wanted never came.
My thumb hovered over the keyboard inside of my text thread with Emmie. Over the last seven days, I typed and deleted countless messages, unable to bring myself to send any of them.
That day in Emmie’s apartment still played on repeat in my head. After watching her skate and seeing how off she was, my only thought was to see her. To make sure she was okay. To be there for whatever she needed.
What I didn’t expect was for her to reduce everything we had to a mistake. Like I meant nothing to her. That thought alone stopped me from hitting send.
Maybe she was right. Maybe being with me was too much. It wouldn’t be the first time someone walked away.
Every girl I was interested in during high school only wanted me for my last name. Like being with me lifted them higher on the food chain at school. They didn’t actually care about me.
Emily left when things got hard. Outside perspective's got in the way, and she let them change how she saw me. Instead of staying, she left without a fight.
Hell, even my own father left without a backward glance.
The moment I was born, he decided having three kids was too much.
He packed his bags and left my mom to raise my brothers and me.
He never once tried to reach out. And while I hated the man, there was still a part of me that felt betrayed that he didn’t stick around to see me grow up.
Everyone always left. So why wouldn’t Emmie?
“Hey, you good?” A hard slap on my shoulder jerked me out of my thoughts.
“Yeah, I’m good.” I turned my screen off and put my phone in my locker before turning to Jake.
The look on his face said he didn’t believe me. “You sure? You’ve been off this whole week.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” Perry interjected.
“No.” It was the same answer I told him the last four times he asked. The two of them meant well, but I didn’t want to talk about it. It was easier to not feel anything at all.
Team practice and needing to take Tucker out were the only reasons I left my apartment. If he hadn’t needed to go for walks, I would have just stayed in my bed until practice and today's game.
Ignoring the glance they shared, I stood to pull my shoulder pads on. I needed to focus on the game that was about to start in thirty minutes. Everything else would have to wait. I was heartbroken and miserable, but my team needed me.
We only had one more game after this before our bye week.
That meant in two weeks it was my mother’s wedding.
A wedding she texted and called about nonstop.
But I didn’t want to think about showing up without Emmie and having to answer all the questions as to why she wasn’t there.
Let alone the pitying looks I’d no doubt get when they learned we weren’t together anymore.
I tried my best to shove that all aside as I finished putting my gear on. I was in the middle of tying my cleats when Coach stepped into my side view clad in his usual black athlete pants, paired with a black sweatshirt with the team's name and logo on it.
“How are you feeling about today's game?” he asked as I straightened to give him my full attention. He was Emmie’s father, but he was also my coach, so it wasn’t like I could ignore him.
My jaw tightened. I knew what he was really asking.
“Good.”
Those green eyes so similar to Emmie’s looked me over. Like he knew how I was actually feeling. I wanted to ask if he saw and talked to Emmie, but I bit back the questions.
“Okay.” He gave me a nod. “Focus on the game. You’ll have time to make things right after.”
That was all he said before he turned on his heel and walked off, no doubt that last part pertaining to Emmie and me. It took everything I had not to follow after him and ask more questions.
I faced my cubby, gripping the metal edges so I wouldn’t reach out and grab my phone.
“Why don’t you just suck his dick while you’re at it?” a voice muttered from behind me.
I turned to find Duncan Jennings standing there, a sneer on his face. He was dressed in his uniform even though he wouldn’t step foot on the field for today’s game.
“Excuse me?”
I heard him. I just wanted to see if he’d repeat it. The fucker was supposed to have been traded, but two weeks ago, the trade fell through. Probably because they realized he couldn’t throw for shit, and his personality was that of a bowling ball.
“From the moment you showed up, you’ve been given special treatment.” Duncan took a step forward. His eyes were blazing, looking a bit wild and unhinged. Like something inside of him snapped. I knew he was trying to bate me for a reaction.
“Have you been fucking his daughter this whole time? Is that why you’re Coach’s favorite?”
The mention of Emmie made my hackles rise.
“What the fuck did you just say?” I took a step toward him, hands curled into fists at my sides. My voice was loud enough to echo through the locker room, causing heads to turn in our direction.
The tension that built between the two of us since the moment I became a part of this team was finally coming to a head. And fine by me. I had no problems breaking this fucker’s nose. Especially since he had the balls to talk about Emmie like that.
“Come on now, don’t be shy. Say that again.” We had the entire locker room’s attention on us.
If he knew what was smart, he wouldn’t say anything else, but Duncan was an idiot.
“Tell me…” Duncan took another step until he was right in my face. If I wasn’t seconds from exploding, I would have found it comical that a man four inches shorter than me was picking a fight. “The pussy must have been good for it to have helped secure your spot on this team.”
I saw red.
Blinding rage set me off as I lunged for Duncan. My fist hit him square in the nose, the crack of bone only adding fuel to my anger.
My hand fisted in the front of his jersey as I shoved him back. Chairs around us fell to their sides as I slammed him against the opposite wall. I hit him again, this time in the cheek, uncaring of the blood marring my knuckles.
Hands grabbed at me, trying to pull me back and to let go of Duncan, but I was far from done with him.
“Keep my girl’s name out of your fucking mouth!” I landed one more punch before the hands gripping me yanked me backward. I fought against their hold. “You don’t ever get to talk about her like that!”
Duncan slid to the floor, not a single teammate going in his direction to help. The sight of the pathetic man lying there bleeding made me stop fighting the men holding me back.
With eyes blazing, I shook off my teammates and whirled around, finding the entire staff, as well as Coach, standing in the middle of the room. I pointed to Duncan, fire in my veins. “You get him fucking gone or you lose your quarterback.”
The locker room was absolutely silent as I stormed out.
The noise from the crowd rang in my ears, giving me a splitting headache. Usually, it didn’t bother me, but today, it felt like nails on a chalkboard. It was the start of the second quarter, and the score was still zero to zero.
I was trying to focus on the game, but my head was still stuck in the locker room. At the things Jennings said about Emmie. My hand curled around the face guard of my helmet. He’s lucky he wasn’t in the locker room by the time I cooled down, or I would have done more to him.
I wasn’t lying when I said if Jennings wasn’t gone they’d lose their quarterback. I wasn’t staying with a team that let a player talk that way about a woman, let alone my woman.
“Boone!” My name being yelled brought my attention back to the game. Defense was making their way off the field, now our turn to try and score.
I jogged over, slipping my helmet on as my team got in position for the play we discussed moments ago. I rolled my shoulders and stood behind my center. Thankfully, out on the field, the noise of the crowd lessened, giving my ears a small respite.
I looked out at my team, trying my hardest to get my head to focus on the here and now. Everything else could wait. It didn’t belong out here, not when being distracted could have consequences.
Taking a steadying breath, I squatted down, hands held out in front of me as I called out the play cues. Get your head in the game, Mateo.
As soon as the ball landed in my hands, I took a step back…then paused.
All of the sudden, my body just froze. Like I wasn’t in command of it. I noticed the blur of movement to my right but did nothing to move. Then a crushing force slammed into me. The hit came fast and hard, straight into my side.
My lungs emptied on impact, breath gone before I could even try to hold onto it. Pain exploded through my ribs as my body buckled. The world tilted.
One second, I was upright, the next, I was on the ground.
I tried to suck in a breath but couldn’t. A tight, crushing pressure locked around my ribs. My mouth opened, gasping for air that wouldn’t come, lungs refusing to cooperate like they’d forgotten how.
Panic flared, making the pain even worse. A broken, strangled gasp finally forced its way out. A sharp, white pain shot along my side. I curled an arm around my middle, lying there while trying to get some sort of air into my lungs despite the pain.
Voices bled around me, multiple people talking all at once.
“Stay down.”
“Don’t move.”
“Mateo, can you hear me?”
I briefly registered them, but all I could focus on was dragging in breaths. All of them were shallow, and they hurt like hell.
My vision blurred as hands moved around my body, checking to see what was wrong.
“Ribs,” I wheezed, which sent another wave of pain through my side.