Chapter Thirteen #2
“Hey!” Ro protests. “My ideas are never questionable. Ambitious, maybe. Slightly illegal on occasion—”
“Frequently illegal,” the other woman corrects with a laugh. She’s petite with strawberry blonde hair pulled into a messy bun, freckles dusting her nose. “I’m Jessa. Fair warning, this crew will have you spilling all your secrets within the hour.”
“That’s the plan,” Victoria says, settling in beside me. Her eyes sparkle with mischief as she leans forward. “So… how long have you and Nitro actually been together?”
My stomach drops. “We are… we’re not really together. We’re just fake dating.”
The women exchange looks that make my skin prickle with awareness.
“Oh, honey,” Gia says, barely suppressing a smile. “That’s adorable.”
“What?” I ask defensively.
“Nothing,” Jessa says, clearly trying not to laugh. “It’s just… fake dating. Sure. That’s definitely what’s happening here.”
“It is!” I insist. “It’s an arrangement. A business transaction.”
Ro snorts so hard she nearly chokes on her drink. “Business transaction. Girl, the way that man looks at you should be rated R.”
“Or X,” Gia adds helpfully.
My face flushes hot. “You’re all wrong. This is temporary. We have an agreement.”
“Honey,” Victoria says, her tone gentle now, leaning forward. “I went undercover in this club, thinking they were all criminals. I was literally a cop trying to take them down. And even I couldn’t deny what was happening between me and Sin.”
“But that’s different,” I protest weakly. “You two had this whole intense situation—”
“And you don’t?” Millie challenges, raising an eyebrow. “Girl, Nitro offered you his apartment. His space. Do you have any idea how big that is for these guys?”
“Especially Nitro,” Jessa adds. “That man guards his personal space as if it’s Fort Knox. The fact that he invited you in? That’s huge.”
“It’s just practical,” I say, but the words sound hollow even to me. “I needed a place to stay.”
“There are a dozen places he could’ve helped you find,” Ro points out. “Hell, we have emergency funds for situations like yours. He could’ve set you up in a hotel, a rental, anywhere. But he brought you home, Marley.”
“Because…” I trail off, not sure how to finish that sentence.
“Because he wanted you there,” Victoria finishes softly. “Because the idea of you being anywhere else probably made him crazy.”
“What you’re saying is crazy,” I rebuke.
“Is it, though?” Ro challenges, fixing me with a knowing look. “Because from where we’re sitting, the way Nitro looks at you is exactly how Sin looks at Victoria. Like you’re the only thing in the room that matters.”
“We have an understanding,” I insist, but the words sound weak, even as they come out of my mouth.
Gia leans back, studying me with those perceptive eyes. “Understandings don’t make a man’s jaw clench when another brother stands too close to you. That’s not business, sugar. That’s jealousy.”
“Has he done the thing yet?” Jessa asks suddenly.
I stare at her blankly. “What thing?”
“The bike thing,” she clarifies. “When they take you on the back of their bike and ride out to some scenic overlook or empty desert road at sunset?”
My silence speaks volumes.
“Oh, she’s had the bike thing,” Ro crows. “Look at her face!”
“It wasn’t like that,” I try to defend, but I’m smiling despite myself. “He just… we went for a ride. That’s all. And it wasn’t at sunset… it was at night, anyway.”
“Mm-hmm,” Millie hums knowingly. “And did your heart do that stupid flutter thing when you wrapped your arms around him?”
“Did you feel safe?” Victoria adds. “Like nothing could touch you as long as you were with him?”
I open my mouth. Close it. Open it again.
“Thought so,” Gia says with satisfaction. “Girl, you are in so deep you can’t even see daylight anymore.”
“I barely know him,” I protest. “We’ve known each other for what, a few weeks?”
“Time’s got nothing to do with it,” Jessa says, her voice going soft. “When it’s right, it’s right. You just know.”
“But what if I’m wrong?” The vulnerability in my voice surprises even me. “What if this is just, I don’t know, proximity? Or gratitude because he helped me?”
Victoria reaches over and squeezes my hand. “Honey, I asked myself the same questions every single day. Loving a biker isn’t easy. It’s messy and complicated and sometimes scary as hell.”
“There’s the club politics,” Ro adds. “The danger that comes with ‘the life.’ ”
“The walls they build up,” Millie continues. “Because most of these guys have been hurt before.”
“The way they show love is different,” Jessa says. “It’s not flowers and poetry. It’s fixing your car without being asked. Standing guard outside your house all night to make sure you’re safe.”
My heart lurches. “How did you—”
“Sugar, nothing stays secret in this clubhouse,” Gia says gently. “We all know Nitro parked outside your house all night. That man was protecting you before this was even ‘fake dating.’ ”
“He’s a gentle giant, you know,” Jessa adds suddenly.
I widen my eyes at the change in direction. “What?”
“Nitro. He puts on this tough-guy act, but the guy plays the flute. He spends most of his time with Queenie, his grandma, and her friends at her retirement village, because he wants to make her happy. He thrives on making others happy. It’s his way of dealing with emotions.
” Jessa smiles. “My point is, these guys might look all tough and rough around the edges, but they feel things deeply. They just show it differently.”
“And when they fall…” Ro says, her voice uncharacteristically serious. “They fall hard. All in. No half measures.”
“So, the question isn’t whether this is real,” Victoria says, her eyes kind. “The question is whether you’re ready to admit it’s real. Because trust me, Marley… Nitro already knows.”
I swallow hard, feeling the weight of their words settle over me.
“I’m scared,” I admit quietly, the confession feeling as though I’m letting go of something I’ve been gripping too tightly.
“That’s how you know it’s real,” Victoria says, squeezing my hand again.
“When it terrifies you,” Millie adds. “When the thought of losing them makes your chest ache.”
“When you start rearranging your whole life without even realizing it,” Gia continues.
“When ‘fake’ starts feeling more ‘real’ than anything else,” Jessa finishes.
“This stopped being fake the moment he stayed outside our house in his car all night,” I say, the realization hitting me like a freight train. “The moment he offered me his apartment. The moment he kissed me in that parking lot and made me feel beautiful for the first time in years.”
“There it is,” Ro says softly, a rare gentleness in her usually brash tone.
“Welcome to the club,” Victoria says with a warm smile. “Literally and figuratively.”
“So… what do I do now?” I ask, feeling lost and found all at once.
Gia grins. “Now? You stop running from it. You let yourself feel it. And when that gorgeous man finally pulls his head out of his ass and tells you what you mean to him?” She leans forward conspiratorially.
“You hold on tight and enjoy the ride. Because loving a biker? It’s the adventure of a lifetime. ”
“Even when they’re being stubborn idiots?” I ask.
“Especially then,” all five women chorus together, and despite everything, the fear, the uncertainty, the sheer impossibility of it all, I find myself laughing.
And for the first time since this whole thing started, I let myself imagine what it might be like to stop pretending this is fake.
To just let it be ‘real.’
The door to the Chapel opens again, and the men start filing out. Nitro’s eyes find mine immediately, and the way his entire expression softens when he sees me makes my breath catch.
Jesus, that meeting was quick.
He crosses the room in long strides, and when he reaches me, his hand finds the back of my neck in a gesture that feels possessive, protective, and perfect.
“Ready to head out?” he asks.
“Yeah,” I say, standing. “I think I am.”
As we walk toward the door, I catch Victoria’s eye. She winks at me, and I can’t help but smile.
Maybe she’s right.
Maybe this is real.
Maybe I’m not as scared as I thought.
Or maybe I am, and that’s precisely why I need to hold on tighter.
Because for the first time since Derek destroyed me, I feel like I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be…
With Nitro.
With his family.
With his brotherhood.
With people who see me and don’t look away.
And as we step out into the Nevada sunshine, Nitro’s hand is warm against my back, and I let myself believe that maybe, just maybe, this could be something real after all.