Chapter 21
Forgive Us Father
CHANCE
And here it is.
I lower myself right back onto the spot I was occupying a minute ago on the couch with Ares right by my side.
Once our stepmother returns to the room, Dad’s hard stare is back on us. It’s funny how everyone says that I’m Dad’s carbon copy; when he has this scowl on his face, he looks much more like Ares.
I fully expect him to start yelling at us about the illegal races, but he doesn’t.
“I thought I had been clear about what Kelly and I expected from the two of you once we became a family. I told you what kind of conduct you two needed to have when it comes to your sister. What part of being siblings you didn’t get?”
Oh, fuck.
“What are you talking about, sweetie?” Kelly looks confused. “Isn’t Zara with Lev?”
Dad’s scowl darkens. “That’s what makes it even worse. If putting our family and your brotherly bond in jeopardy weren’t enough, you don’t care about hurting your best friend. I thought I raised you better than that. Which one of you is sleeping with Zara behind Lev’s back?”
What the fuck? I’m offended that Dad would think Ares and I would stoop that low.
“Neither of us is sleeping with Zara behind Lev’s back.” I bite out.
He rolls his eyes. “Come on, Chance. I guess I deserve that you’d think I’m deaf and blind after you’ve all been racing in my town for weeks and I have been none the wiser.
But I have eyes and ears, and it would behoove you to stop lying to me.
Work has been intense lately, and it has taken me away from the house more than I expected, but it took one hour with all of you to see it as clear as day.
The way you look and speak to her would have been enough to tip me off all on its own.
Baby? Princess? That isn’t how you speak to a sibling.
But it’s the way you touch her that shows you up without a doubt.
So stop lying to us. Which one of you is she sleeping with? ”
Ares speaks before I can.
“We’re both sleeping with Zara.”
“But we aren’t doing it behind Lev’s back.” I add.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen my father this shocked. Not even earlier when he was blindsided by our petition first, and by finding out about the races later.
Even then he wasn’t rendered speechless, but I think we might just have broken him. He is staring at me and Ares with his mouth gaping open.
Kelly, on the other hand, gasps. “What… how… I think you owe me and your father an explanation.”
I brace myself for the possible fallout that could result from the truth.
And I’d be lying if I said that I’m not relieved that the truth is finally coming out.
I’ve been wanting to come clean with Dad about my feelings for Zara for a while now.
Life has just been too crazy to find the right time. I guess that time is now.
“Look, Dad.” I look him right in the eye.
“When you told us what you expected our relationship with Zara to look like on the night of the wedding, I didn’t like it.
But I love you, and I’ve always wanted you to be proud of me.
God knows that after we lost Mom and Atlas, you fucking deserved to be happy.
So I tried. That night I told Zara that we could only be friends.
But no matter how hard we tried, we still love each other.
She’s my person, and I’m hers. I’m sorry about lying to you; it wasn’t our intention.
We just wanted to figure things out between us and talk to you once we were sure our feelings for each other were the real thing.
I swear I was gonna talk to you. Then the whole racing thing happened, and things got really crazy.
But I love Zara with all my heart, and she loves me.
I hope you aren’t going to ask me to choose between my love for you and my love for her. I can’t live without her, Dad.”
Ares
Dad shakes his head.
“I don’t know what to say, Chance. Even if Kelly and I could wrap our heads around how you feel about Zara, what about your best friend and your brother?
If my ears aren’t failing me, Ares just said that he’s sleeping with her too.
And she just left holding Lev’s hand. You say that if I forced you to choose, you’d choose Zara.
But would she choose you? That’s exactly why I said what I said the night of the wedding. ”
Kelly intervenes. “This is what your dad, and I were afraid of. That you would both fall for her and that those feelings would damage your relationship with each other. That also puts us in an impossible position. You’re all our kids, and we can’t take sides.”
“We would never expect you to take sides.” Chance reassures them.
“What are you going to do if Zara chooses your brother instead of you?” Dad insists.
“Are you and your brother going to be at odds with each other? Or if she ends up choosing Lev, will the two of you bear a grudge against your stepsister? Can’t you see why we warned you?
This is a recipe for disaster. And Kelly and I refuse to let it affect our relationship. ”
It’s time to set the record straight.
“We understand where you’re coming from, Dad.
I promise. And maybe your worries weren’t completely unfounded.
But Zara isn’t going to choose between me and Chance.
And we would never betray Lev. We might not be brothers by blood, but our bond with him couldn’t be stronger if we were.
He loves Zara just as much as Chance and I do.
She makes us happy, and we make her happy.
After losing Atlas, I didn’t think I would ever feel whole again.
But Zara helped me heal some of my worst wounds.
I’ll always miss an important part of me, but with her and with my brothers I finally feel like I can breathe again. ”
Shock is written all over our parents’ faces as they look at me and Chance.
“What the heck are you saying?” Dad pulls at his tie with a shaky hand, as if the collar of his shirt was suddenly too tight.
“I’m saying that we’re all going to be with Zara.
This isn’t a whim or a phase. Each of us is deeply in love with her, and she’s in love with each of us.
We know it’s messy. Believe me, it took me a second to make peace with the fact that I was the one for her but not the only one.
But Zara makes Chance and Lev as happy as she makes me, so I finally accepted it. ”
Neither of them looks happy, but Kelly is the one who voices her skepticism first. “So what are you saying? You guys are in some kind of an open relationship with my daughter?”
“Oh, fuck, no.” Chance reacts. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to cuss. But to answer your question, no. There’s nothing open about our relationship. We’re just with Zara, and she’s just with the three of us. The relationship is airtight.”
Our stepmother considers his words. “So you’re all one hundred percent committed to Zara, and she’s committed to the three of you, and you’re all on board with that?”
“Yes, ma’am.” We both nod.
“I never thought I would say this, but… I think I’m ok with it.”
Chance, Dad and I have similar reactions to her statement.
“You are?” We ask in unison, unable to hide our surprise.
“I am. I have been very worried about Zara. I like Lev, but I couldn’t help but notice the way you and Chance looked at her.”
Dad takes his wife’s hand in his. “You did?”
“Sweetie,” Kelly sounds amused. “Women are a lot more perceptive about these kinds of things. But yeah, I had noticed that something was going on. I’m glad it wasn’t what I thought it was.”
I can’t help but ask her what she means.
“It’s no secret why I left Zara’s father.
He was unfaithful to me pretty much constantly from the beginning of our relationship.
He broke my heart so badly that I didn’t think I could ever trust another man again.
He messed with my self-esteem. Because of his cheating, I thought that I wasn’t deserving of being loved, that I would never be enough for someone else not to step out on me.
When I met your father, I almost didn’t give him a shot because I was afraid that history would repeat itself. ”
Dad brings her hand to his lips, brushing a kiss over her knuckles. “I’m glad I wore you down, Kelly. I hope I say it enough, but I love you.”
Shit.
I never thought I would say this, but the way our parents are looking at each other pulls at my heartstrings. They’re cute.
“I love you too, Scott. And I love your wonderful sons, and I think my daughter is lucky to have them, and Lev, and they’re lucky to have her.
I’m proud of you all for doing this without cheating and lying to each other.
This is why I’m ok with it. Your relationship might not be conventional, but it’s honest, and it’s real. ”
Our father clears his throat, his expression stern and serious. “Jesus, what a day! Is there anything else you are lying to us about? Any more secrets?”
“No.” We both promise. “This is everything.”
I don’t know if Dad is going to be as accepting as Kelly about our relationship, but it feels good not to have to lie to him anymore. I’ve never liked that we did.
“There’s one thing I find difficult to understand,” Dad says to me and my brother. “Aren’t any of you three jealous? How do you guys deal with it?”
“Jealousy is unavoidable.” I admit. “But we talk about it.”
Chance lets out a low chuckle. “Sometimes we fight about it. But we know that Zara doesn’t really have a favorite. She loves each of us with all her heart. And we love each other too. So we talk and fight until we get over it.”
He’s right. “I’m gonna be honest, Dad. I was the one who struggled the most with not asking Zara to choose.
But with everything that happened with Fox and Morelli, I realized that I couldn’t have kept Zara safe without Chance and Lev.
That they would have given everything for Zara just like I would. That was what sealed the deal for me.”
There’s a long moment of silence between us.
It seems today’s theme; telling each other the truth and taking everything in.
“I’m not going to promise anything.” Dad finally says. “This is really unconventional. But I’m not against it if there’s no lying and cheating. It’s up to you to prove to me that this is real. But unless you show me otherwise, you have my support.”
This is huge. It’s more than we could have expected from our father.
“Thanks, Dad.”
His smile is hesitant, but it’s there. “I have one last question. Are you going to keep up the ruse that Zara is dating just Lev? If that’s the case, you should be careful with PDAs.
I don’t want people to get the wrong idea if they see her with one of you.
People would judge, and even though I hate double standards, Zara would be the one judged more harshly. ”
Kelly agrees. “It’s sad, but true. Besides, you two grew up in Star Cove, but Zara is new in town.”
“We haven’t really talked about what we would do once we talked to you,” Chance says. “I’m not ashamed of our relationship.”
I clasp my brother’s shoulder. “Me neither, and I know Zara and Lev are on the same page on that. How about we just start breaking the news to people who matter to us gradually?”
“That sounds like the best way to handle this,” Kelly says.
Dad sighs. “Well, this has been a strange and eventful day. Let’s go out to dinner now, or Zara and Lev will think we ditched them.”
As I follow my family out of the house, I look at the evening sky. Things are starting to slowly fall into place in my life. I just wish we could be sure that Zara is safe. There’s no guarantee that the person who wants to hurt her won’t try to get to her outside the racetrack.
Chance, Lev and I need to keep our guard up. We have too much to lose.