Chapter 24 #2
“I’ll work for Lev’s parents until I can enroll back into college. I’ll be a freshman again next semester. In the meantime,” he murmurs, squeezing me closer into his side. “I want to spend every second we aren’t studying or working wherever you are.”
Ares
The drive back home is quiet but peaceful.
I only let go of Zara’s hand when I have to change gears, and I swear to God it’s the only time I regret not buying a car with an automatic transmission.
The inaugural race is only a few days away, but I don’t want to think about it right now.
All I want is to enjoy having my girl by my side. Zara has a calming effect on me. When I’m with her, the noise of the outside world fades away and everything feels right.
The only thing that will never feel right again is that Atlas isn’t here to see how happy Zara makes me.
But my twin brother is a part of me, and I like to think that as long as I’m living and breathing, he’s never going to be truly gone.
Every time I think about the race, and the possibility that the dirt bike will be back, my thoughts go to Atlas. If he’s watching us from above, I hope he can protect us. Especially Zara.
“Babe, did you hear what I just said?” She smiles as I park in front of the house. In the year I’ve been living in my own apartment, I started considering this Dad’s house as opposed to my house. But now, as I look at the house I grew up in, it feels like home. And it’s all because Zara is here.
“No, sorry, princess. I was a little distracted. What did you say?”
“I was thinking about getting some pizza.”
I exit the car and jog around the front of it to open Zara’s door for her. “Pizza sounds good.” I don’t let go of her hand after helping her out of my Jeep.
“You still look a little distracted.” She enquires, looking into my eyes. “What’s on your mind?”
A slow smile spreads onto my lips, and I advance, pushing Zara against the side of my car. “I was thinking about all the things I want to do with you after dinner.” I whisper in her ear.
Her arms surround my neck. “Really? I like the sound of that. Can you give me a hint?” She pulls me closer; our lips aren’t touching, but I can feel the warmth of her breath on my mouth.
“Let’s just say that after I carb up, you’re gonna be my dessert. I want to eat you out until you scream my name so loud that the neighbors will make a noise complaint.”
Zara giggles. “That would have to be really loud. These mansions have such extensive gardens and big driveways that they’re very spaced out.”
“Yup.” I chuckle darkly. “I’m going to fuck you with my tongue and then lick and suck on your clit over and over.”
She squirms, tensing up in my arms.
I know she’s rubbing her thighs together in search of relief.
“God, I love when you do that to me, Ares. You’re so good with your mouth.”
“I love you.” I murmur, closing the negligible distance between our lips and kissing her as hard and deep as I’ll be doing to her pussy later.
“Oh. My. God.”
I break the kiss with Zara, turning to look at the owner of the shocked voice that comes from behind my back.
Fuck.
Heather is standing behind me with Dave Fox in tow.
“Zara,” her voice breaks, as if she were trying to hold back tears. “What are you doing?”
“Heather, I was going to tell you. Things have just been busy, and I didn’t get the chance.”
Heather shakes her head. “Yeah. Busy sounds like the appropriate word here.”
I don’t like her tone, and I have no problem letting her know that. “Hey. This is none of your business. So whatever you’re going to say next, I would watch it.”
Heather’s eyes narrow into two furious slits as she immediately bites back.
“Oh, don’t worry. I wasn’t going to be mad at Zara.
Even though I’m disappointed that our friendship is obviously a one-way street since she doesn’t seem to confide in me no matter what.
You, on the other hand, are the worst asshole in the world. ”
This woman, I swear to God.
I don’t know how my brother could put up with Heather. But I know better than to say that.
“Takes one to know one.” I sneer instead. “Whatever you think is going on here, you’re wrong. And even if you were right, it still wouldn’t be your concern.”
Heather crosses her arms over her chest. “So are you telling me that you fucking your brother and your best friend’s girlfriend behind their backs isn’t something I should worry about?
Chance and Lev are my friends, and I don’t want to see them getting hurt.
And you are one hell of a hypocrite, Ares.
You made me feel like the worst piece of shit on earth after Atlas’s funeral for wanting your comfort.
You said you felt like you would be cheating on Atlas if you had been with me, but you have no problem fucking Chance’s girl? ”
Zara intervenes, stopping the onslaught of Heather’s verbal attack. “Heather, we aren’t cheating.”
“I don’t believe you. Are you going to tell me again that Chance and Lev know? Like you did with Chance?”
“I know it might be hard to believe. But that’s exactly what I’m going to tell you.
Look, I owe you an apology. I should have told you everything the last time we talked about this.
It’s just that our parents didn’t know yet.
And there was so much strain in Ares and Scott’s relationship…
Hold on a second. Did you just say to Ares something about being together? ”
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
I don’t know what Heather was thinking, but I don’t want Zara to get the wrong idea.
“It was nothing.” The words come out of my mouth in a rush.
“It was just one kiss. One drunken kiss the night of Atlas’s funeral.
We were both devastated and missing my brother, and I don’t even know why the fuck we kissed.
Maybe we were trying to feel less lonely, but it felt so fucking wrong.
We stopped immediately, and nothing else happened. ”
Zara’s expression is hard to read. “Right.” She bites out.
“Princess, I’m sorry. Maybe I should have told you, but it didn’t mean anything.
I didn’t kiss Heather because I wanted her.
I was just missing my brother; I was so fucking broken.
She was feeling the same way, and for a really fucked up second, I thought that being close to her would help me feel better.
But the second our lips touched, I knew it was actually the opposite.
Being with Heather felt like taking something that wasn’t mine.
Atlas would have maybe understood if I had feelings for her, but I didn’t.
I never have. To me, Heather has always been like an annoying little sister.
And sleeping with her would have been something I could have never come back from. ”
My words hit the intended target. Some of the tension in Zara’s shoulders eases.
“Ok.” She squeezes my hand. “I think I get it.”
I hang my head, exhaling a relieved breath that she isn’t mad at me. “I’m sorry; maybe I should have told you sooner. To be honest, I try not to think about that time. It’s just too hard. And that kiss didn’t help. It just made me feel icky.”
What I just said appeased Zara, but it had the opposite effect on Heather.
“Icky? Is that how I make you feel?” She screams. “You were hard after we kissed. You didn’t look that grossed out to me. And we couldn’t have cheated on someone who was gone.”
Like I did almost two years ago, I’m honest with her.
“It wasn’t you who grossed me out, Heather.
It was the whole situation. You were my twin brother’s girlfriend.
He adored you. Can’t you see how fucked up it would have been to be together that way?
Atlas and I looked identical. You didn’t want me.
You wanted him, and your grief was making you see him instead of me.
You’re right that you can’t cheat on someone who’s no longer alive.
But sleeping with me, telling yourself it was him, would have been like cheating.
On yourself, on his memory and on me. And I’m sorry if that offends you, but there was never any attraction between me and you.
I would have just slept with you trying to hold on to a piece of Atlas. It would have been wrong.”