Chapter 10 Damn Magnetic Pull
Damn Magnetic Pull
Noah
Did I know what a hornet’s nest I had just inadvertently stepped into?
I absolutely did. It couldn’t be helped, however.
I’d seen Lou and Verdell talking to Jules and went up to say hello and, as I overheard Lou wanting to get Jules’s breakfast, I’d stepped around to do that instead.
Why? Excellent question that I had no answer for.
Something in my gut had said I needed to.
I was no caveman and strongly believed in women’s rights.
Ivy would kick my ass if I didn’t. So why did it matter who paid?
A tiny voice that I was working to ignore told me that in buying Jules’s breakfast, this was in fact the date I was trying to tell myself it wasn’t.
So everything was going along swimmingly.
My brain was a mess. Maybe I could convince Jules I’d like to start dating in twelve years when Addie was an adult?
I’m sure that’s a completely normal request that women everywhere want to hear.
To make matters worse, I went ahead and put out there in front of Lou that I’d been at Jules’s place last night and had dinner with her.
I’ve lived in this town for over a year and wasn’t oblivious.
I knew exactly who I was talking to and what she was capable of.
Still didn’t stop me as I laid it all out there for public consumption.
I wouldn’t blame Jules if she wanted to ditch our breakfast date—no part of the woman I’d started to get to know said please make me the focus of town gossip.
However, as Lou talked about her steamy-romance club, one I knew all about because Ivy was a member, I could see Jules was quickly looking as uncomfortable as she had last night when I’d found her book, but this time I didn’t think it had anything to do with me. A quick exit was in order.
I nodded at our audience and placed a hand on Jules’s back to move her toward my chair.
“Sorry to break up this party, but I need to borrow Jules for a bit. Have a great Saturday, all.” With that, I passed Jules her coffee from an amused-looking Allyson and took a decisive step toward where I’d been sitting. Jules, thankfully, moved with me.
“We’ll talk more later, Jules.” Lou’s voice followed our rapid retreat and indicated that none of this would be forgotten.
“And I’ll bring your breakfast in a bit,” Allyson called.
“Ughhhhhh.” The noise coming from Jules was a combination of a moan and a gurgle. I looked at her in amusement as I led her to the comfortable armchair and away from prying eyes.
“Sorry?” I murmured as we both sank into our respective chairs. I mean, I might as well have pissed in a circle around her. One didn’t “claim” their friends, but I figured I could just continue on my path of denial. It was working so well and all.
“Are you?” Jules’s voice was laced with a combination of amusement and what sounded like nerves. “Are you aware of what you have set in motion?”
“This isn’t my first day in Highland Falls.” I lifted my coffee and raised it in her direction. “Let them talk.” I sounded far more confident than my thudding heart felt.
She shook her head and mumbled something that sounded like he doesn’t know what he’s in for. Time would tell.
I settled back to get comfortable in my deep leather chair. It was perfectly worn and ridiculously comfortable. I had a brief thought of wishing I could convince Allyson to sell it to me.
“So, shall we pick up where we left off last night?” A flush worked its way up Jules’s neck to her cheeks as she bit the corner of her lower lip. I worked to keep myself from prying it free as I thought of how I could possibly set her at ease. “Sorry, if you don’t want to share, that’s fine too.”
Jules held back on replying as she moved to find the perfect spot in her chair, drawing her legs up to sit cross-legged with her back resting on the far arm before looking over to me.
I took the moment she needed to situate herself to soak the woman in without being obvious.
Her hair was up in a messy bun with strands escaping all over.
She had on some loose jeans, rolled up at the bottom, and a too-big long-sleeved T-shirt.
While none of her clothes were fitted, they were somehow even more alluring than if they had been.
Like I desperately wanted to see her without them.
Jesus, man. Get yourself together.
Whatever Jules wanted to say had to wait during a momentary reprieve from Allyson as she dropped off Jules’s breakfast sandwich and an almond croissant for me.
“Enjoy,” she said as she gave me a knowing look. Yep, I’d be hearing from Ivy later.
“Okay.” Jules’s voice pulled me back to the present, thankfully. “So I mentioned last night that the only other person who knows I write is my friend Kylie.” She looked over her shoulder as she spoke those words, as if to ensure herself no one was eavesdropping.
I gave her my full attention. I could tell this was a big deal. “Why haven’t you told anyone?”
She stared at her coffee, running a finger over the rim of the cup repeatedly.
“Honestly, I don’t know if I can fully verbalize why.
When I first started writing several years ago, I wrote for stress relief and to do something just for me.
I never thought anything I wrote would see the light of day.
” She took a sip of coffee, still not meeting my eyes.
“Then, once I decided to try to publish it, I still thought it was for me to be able to say I did it—even just to myself. I figured no one would ever read it.”
I nodded, not wanting to interrupt her. Seemed like this was something she might be processing as she spoke.
“Once my books started selling and I got over the shock of it, I realized I needed to share with my family, but I didn’t want to.
My friend, Kylie, found out because she stopped by my apartment one day when I was writing and saw my computer before I could stop her.
She tried reassuring me, built up my confidence, but it was hard to even have her read my books.
The idea of my mom or Lou—” She shuddered with obvious discomfort before shaking it off.
“I tried to make rules for myself, like I’d tell them once I reached a certain level.
” She looked abashed. “But then I kept moving the level.”
“So you wouldn’t have to say anything.” I nodded, attempting to offer her support even from my seat.
I didn’t know what it was about Jules, but there was a part of me that wanted to protect her, to offer her comfort.
I felt that on some level with my long friendship with Ivy, with being a dad to Ivy, but this was different and something I reminded myself I couldn’t have, not yet.
“Exactly,” she whispered.
“And now?” I prodded.
She grimaced. “And now I just learned that my aunt has potentially already read my first book.”
I had to laugh at her horrified look. “And this is terrible because…”
Jules leaned toward my chair. “Noah, my books are steamy.”
Interesting. “By steamy, I’m taking it that there are descriptions of characters having sex?”
There went her lower lip again as she worried it between her teeth before giving me a slow nod. Mental note, add reading Jules’s books to my immediate to-do list.
“Are you embarrassed or ashamed of that?”
Her head tilted as she thought for a moment.
“No, not ashamed. But as a culture, people are weird about it, you know? Like I’ve had people ask me on my writing accounts on social media if those scenes are based on my own life.
One, that’s strange. And two, the answer is no, of course not.
” She paused, looking lost in thought for a moment.
“I don’t know if that’s why I get so freaked out by my family reading them—maybe I’m scared they’ll assume the same?
Or…” She looked out the window as she mulled it over.
“Maybe I’m afraid they’ll think the book is just bad overall. ”
I thought about that. “Well, I don’t know many people who write books, only Elle who lives in town.
She’s a historical fiction author. But Jules”—I made sure she met my gaze—“I think that it’s incredible that you are able to take something that exists in your imagination and put it in a form for others to enjoy.
I have a feeling that anyone you share this news with will think similarly.
Especially people who are related to you. ”
Jules looked down again as she mumbled a reply.
“Yeah, confidence in myself isn’t something I have in droves.
Heck”—she rubbed her thumb over the handle on her mug—“the struggle to even write my current book is real. Just the knowledge that people were reading it made writing harder. The idea of being open with everyone…” She shuddered.
I reached over and tapped her knee to get her to look up.
“Jules, it’s not for me to decide if or when you share your writing life with others, so I am not judging what you’ve done so far.
And I don’t know your parents, but trust me when I say that Lou would likely be your biggest cheerleader if she knew. ”
Her eyes welled up, which made my heart clench, and I wished I could scoop her into my lap and hold her.
“Thanks, Noah. It’s nice to talk to someone about this even if it’s not easy.”
I kept my seat and tried for reassurance. “You’ve got this, Jules. Maybe you need to work on imagining what it would feel like no longer carrying it around as a secret.”
At that comment, she nodded and picked up her sandwich and began to eat while gazing out the window, clearly processing my words. I took a moment and sat back, sipped my coffee, took a bite of my croissant, and gave her some space to think.