Chapter 10
I glance at the entrance to the building, then back down at my phone, checking for the dozenth time to see if I somehow missed a message or call.
But there are no messages, and there’s no sign of Ambrose or Jackson waiting out front for me.
I’ve been in the cafe across the street for the past half hour, watching out the front window so I didn’t miss them arriving.
I’ve triple-checked I’m in the right place, even going so far as to confirm with Lauren, who seemed less than pleased for me to be bothering her during her launch party instead of figuring things out on my own.
They’re not here, and I’m freaking out. How long do I wait? Did they change the plans and decide not to include me? Did I misunderstand and they’re waiting for me back at the house?
I sip the latte that I’ve been nursing, the aroma a sad facsimile of the omega I’m here to win back.
Then pointedly ignore the frustrated huff of a customer that’s been lurking nearby waiting for my seat to free up.
I’m not getting up until I know what’s happening.
The last thing I want is for Camille to come outside and see me loitering there like a stalker.
Another minute passes, and my nerves continue to ratchet up so high that when my phone vibrates with an incoming call, I startle so hard I almost drop it.
“Hey! I’m across the street from the venue, and I haven’t seen you guys. Is everything okay? Did I make a mistake?” I blurt out the stream of my anxious thoughts before Ambrose can get a word in, even though he’s the one that called me.
“Breathe, love,” he murmurs, his voice and the corresponding soothing energy through the bond an instant balm to my nerves. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m so glad you made it there.”
“Of course I’m here. I promised I’d come.” Given my terrible track record, I’m not hurt that he’d think I might not come. I’m guilty about behaving in a way that would give him any doubt. But I meant it when I said I’m all in. I’m terrified I’m going to screw things up anyway, but I’m going to try.
“Jackson owes me five bucks,” Ambrose says, teasing evident in his tone.
“Only five? I would’ve thought it’d warrant at least a twenty,” I joke back, savoring the warm rumble of my mate’s laugh.
“Eh, he didn’t really doubt you, so he knew it wasn’t a good bet.”
“Sure he didn’t.” I could feel Jackson’s stress through the bond over the past few days, and I’m confident no small part of that was worry about me following through. “So, are you guys almost here? I haven’t gone inside because I didn’t think it’d be good if Camille saw me on my own.”
Despite my best efforts to keep my link with her closed, knowing that Camille is across the street made it impossible for me to keep everything out.
I’ve felt multiple strong spikes of stress from her in the time I’ve been sitting here, and each one had me ready to spring out of my chair and race across the street to get rid of whatever was causing her to feel that way.
I thought it was torture not letting myself feel her through the bond, the strain of keeping the barricade up almost unbearable at times with how much my alpha demanded I check and make sure she’s okay.
But feeling her again is a thousand times worse.
If tonight goes south and she doesn’t give me a chance, I’m not sure how I’ll survive putting the barrier back in place.
Don’t catastrophize. I can practically hear Dr. Mike’s voice echoing in my head. Easy for him to say when I doubt he’s had to fight every instinct inside him to ignore the call of a bond.
Ambrose sighs. “I’m stuck in traffic. There was an accident a few blocks from the house, and I’ve been sitting at the same light for the past fifteen minutes with no sign of movement.
At this rate, I’d probably get there sooner if I were to get out and walk there, but there’s nowhere for me to park my car. ”
“Shit. Okay. What about Jackson? Could one of you walk here? I know it’s not ideal, but—”
“Jackson had to take Dahlia to the emergency vet.”
Alarm surges inside me. “Is she okay? What happened?” I want to ask why someone didn’t call to tell me, because I love Dolly, but I don’t have the right to be upset when I abandoned her along with everyone else.
“She threw up a bunch right before we were about to leave. I don’t think it’s anything drastic since there was no sign she got into something in the house that would make her sick. He took her to make sure she’s okay.” Ambrose lets out a weak groan. “Just our luck, right?”
“So what should I do?” I pinch between my brows and push a little into my connection to Camille.
There’s a base level of stress that hasn’t gone away, and she seems miserable.
“I’m not sure how long Camille is going to stay at the party, but if you get here in the next half hour or so, it might still be okay. ”
“I’ll do my best, but I don’t have high hopes.” Ambrose pauses, and I can feel through the bond what he’s about to say before he speaks. “You’re going to need to go in there on your own.”
“No way. That’s a terrible idea!” My loud protest earns me a side-eye from the beta working on a laptop beside me.
I suck in a deep breath and lower my voice.
“Jackson is the one who was invited to the party. I’m only allowed to be there as his guest. Camille will freak out if I’m there on my own.
She won’t talk to me. Besides, Lauren will—”
“Lauren wants us to help Camille,” Ambrose interrupts. “She’ll be more upset with you if she thinks you didn’t show up. I doubt they’ll help us again if none of us come after they badgered Camille into attending.”
“But…”
Ambrose’s energy through the bond turns adamant and stern. “You said you’d do whatever it takes to make our pack whole.”
He doesn’t need to say anything else. My stomach churns, and the familiar urge to run away from conflict rises, but I swallow it down.
“Okay. You’re right. I’ll go talk to her and try to keep her there until you get here. I can’t promise it won’t be a disaster. In fact, I can almost guarantee it will be.”
Ambrose lets out a small laugh. “Can’t be worse than bonding her and then getting her fired.”
“I didn’t get her fired!” I hiss, and the laptop guy gives a disgruntled huff, shutting his computer like he can’t work under these conditions.
“I know, I know. Just talk to her. Try not to get defensive. She’s going to be angry, but she needs to see that you won’t give up the second things get uncomfortable. Honestly, maybe it’s better it’s only you right now.”
“I doubt that,” I groan, standing up from my post by the cafe window and forcing myself to toss my coffee in the trash and head across the street while I still have the nerve. “Wish me luck. I’m heading in.”
“Good luck.” There’s a pause, and flickers of Ambrose’s worry and tentative hope seep through the bond. “No matter what happens, I’m proud of you.”
His voice is so tender that tears well in my eyes. I struggle against the urge to dismiss his words. To tell myself I’m undeserving of them. Undeserving of the love of such an incredible alpha. Undeserving of the pack we’ve formed. Undeserving of the omega I’m about to try to win back.
Those thoughts led to where we are now. I refuse to let them control me.
It’s not a matter of deserving something or worth.
These people are my pack, and a true pack, one formed with love and respect, means giving and accepting support.
Showing up when you’re needed and being vulnerable when you’re struggling.
It may take me a lifetime for my first instinct not to be avoidance and self-sabotage.
Maybe I’ll never stop feeling that way. But I’m trying to be better, and as terrifying as it is, it also feels right.
“I love you.” I don’t mean to say the words aloud because I don’t want to pressure him to say them back. “Shit, sorry.”
Ambrose snorts. “You should be.” There’s a brief pause. “I love you, too. Now get off the phone and go get our omega.”
God, no wonder Camille is stressed. The party is packed, ballroom full to bursting with people. I don’t usually have a problem with crowds, but even my alpha is agitated by it.
I’m not surprised by the success of the event given how talented Lauren is and the network she’s built over the years.
She should’ve been on the board of Pulse instead of working as a mid-level agent, and I’m sure they’re shitting themselves now.
They didn’t ever bother to make her sign a non-compete clause, so certain that her role at the firm was the best an omega could hope to achieve.
Serves them right to lose half their clients as a reward.
When I found out she’d hired Camille, that was a cherry on top of the fuck you to those assholes.
I regret not having quit sooner. If I could go back in time, I’d quit the moment Camille met Ambrose and Jackson and never look back. Then I wouldn’t be here sweating through my dress shirt as I wade into the crowd.
“River, good to see you!” A hand clamps onto my arm, pulling me away from my search for Camille. Turning in place, I find a smiling beta who has a familiar face, but I can’t for the life of me remember who he is or how he knows me.
“Good to see you,” I reply, hoping he doesn’t notice my lack of recognition.
“Here spying for Pulse?” the beta asks with a lopsided grin. He must’ve been a client. Maybe something to do with one of the tech firms? It eludes me, but I can’t find it in me to care. I’m too on edge to focus, knowing at any moment I could see Camille.
“Hah, no, I left Pulse a few months ago. Just here for support.” I try to smile, but it comes off more as a grimace. “My packmate was invited,” I add, even though this man didn’t ask, and bringing it up without said packmate around makes it seem weirder.
The beta replies with a joke I barely process as a flash of red hair catches my eye. All of my focus snaps toward it, and my breath punches out of me as I see her.
Fuck me, she’s stunning. Hair in soft waves cascading down over one shoulder, tight black dress molded to her full, heart-shaped ass in a way that has my alpha standing at attention and my pants growing uncomfortably tight.
Once again, I kick myself for trying to resist her. How in any universe did I convince myself that was possible? Camille is a shining star, and I’m in an inescapable orbit around her. Not that I’d ever want to escape. Not when the mere sight of her has my heart swelling despite the surge of nerves.
I have only a moment to drink in the sight of her back before she turns, as if she senses my eyes on hers. Her gaze sweeps across the room, and even from a distance I can see the discomfort on her face.
Something is wrong.
The remaining barrier I erected for my bond with her crumbles at the sight, needing to know how to help her. I swallow down my alpha’s growl as her pain and panic lance through me. I’m moving on instinct, leaving behind the beta mid-sentence as I weave my way towards her.
The crowd shifts, and suddenly there’s no one to obscure me from her line of sight.
The flash of shock in her expression and the accompanying distress through the bond when she sees me are almost unbearable.
My omega is meant to smile and relax in my presence, and my alpha bristles when her reaction to my presence is dismay.
She turns on her heels, moving away from me as fast as she can short of breaking out into a run.
“Camille, wait,” I call feebly, not wanting to shout and draw attention to her. I follow, only stopping when an angry Astrid steps out into my path.
The petite beta crosses her arms, glaring at me. “What are you doing? Where’s Jackson and Ambrose?”
“I didn’t do anything,” I snap, my alpha angry that she’s keeping me from going to Camille. “I was walking over to try to talk, but when she noticed me, she bolted.”
“Well, maybe you should’ve sent one of the other guys that didn’t bond her and run away to talk first.”
“They’re not here yet.” It’s hard to keep the growl of frustration out of my voice. There’s a surge of pain again through the bond, and I rake my fingers through my hair, looking in the direction Camille went. “Fuck, I need to help her. Something is wrong.”
Astrid shakes her head. “What’s wrong is you’re—”
I hold a hand up. “Listen, I know I fucked things up, and she hates me, but she’s in pain and she needs help. So please move out of my way before my alpha has me make a scene.”
Her dark red lips fall open at my words, and she steps out of the way, eyes wide.
I don’t bother apologizing. There’s no time.
My omega needs me, and I won’t let anything keep me from being there for her like I should’ve been all along.