Chapter 22
Two years ago
There will never be a summer like the one you have at sixteen. At least, that’s what my art teacher told me on my way out of my last exam.
We had nine long, languid weeks in the sun that year, when we didn’t have a single thing to worry about between June and September.
We were on the cusp of being grown up. Sixteen feels like you have the world on offer and all you have to do is reach out and take it, and yet, you’re still kid enough to have Mum and Dad to fall back on, still na?ve enough to enjoy it all without consequence.
I could’ve stayed home in London if I’d wanted to, picnicking in Hyde Park, going to music festivals, or catching the train to Brighton and staying out on the pier until it’s dark and we’d have to sprint to catch the last train home.
But my summers had always been in the country.
And though the last time I saw Jacob, when he’d come to visit me in the city, something wasn’t right, I knew that everything would be okay once we were back to our familiar habitat.
‘Are you sure you can trust him to drive?’ I said to Jacob as we waited for Will to pick us up in his new car.
He’d passed his driving test two months earlier, and had decided that we’re to go in convoy to the beach.
And though that sounds like a delicious idea because the temperature hadn’t stopped climbing all week and I was desperate to wade in the coolness of the sea, I couldn’t help but imagine all that could go wrong with Will in the driver’s seat.
The Thorogoods had a tradition that every summer they’d spend at least a weekend at the coast, come rain or shine.
Sian always said that if the sea air was good enough for sickly Victorians, it was good enough for them.
And they were never too far away if they needed to be called back to the farm.
This year, however, Sian and Dave had been so swamped on the farm that they hadn’t found the time – it had been a tough spring that was shaping up into a hot summer, and they couldn’t afford missing even a day.
I had always been so jealous when they’d disappear for the weekend.
All my fun would stop, and I would sit alone in the treehouse wondering what they were getting up to.
So, when Jacob mentioned heading out for the afternoon, just the boys and a few friends, I couldn’t say no, despite my reservations about who was driving.
This was my chance to get a little taster of the famous Thorogood beach weekend.
‘You know he’s driven a tractor on the farm since we were twelve, right?
’ Jacob had yet to mention anything about London, and neither had I.
In all honesty, I was grateful. Perhaps he had just gotten up on the wrong side of the bed, or he was just a little overwhelmed with the travel and the city, but back home, everything continued as if his visit never happened at all.
‘Yes, but I’ve also seen him try and jump a moped over a pig sty and end up with a face full of shit.’ I chewed on my lip and clung a bit tighter to my towel.
Lizzie and Callum stood beside us, neither of them talking, just watching Lizzie’s phone together whilst each of them let out a loud exhale from their nose at something funny, both of them completely unbothered at the prospect of climbing into Will’s death trap.
‘Okay, yeah, maybe he’s not always been the most responsible, or the smartest. But one: he’s got a black box so he can’t go above about fifty miles an hour even if he wants to, and two: he’s growing up a bit.
The whole mardy thing he’s got going on right now, it’s because dad mentioned about him working full time on the farm, and now he thinks he’s the man of the house.
’ Jacob rolled his eyes. ‘Either way, I’ll be right next to you, and if you get scared at any point, we will both get out and walk home if we have to. ’
Just managing a smile, I thanked him silently for his reassurance, and it didn’t come a moment too soon. Will whipped around the corner in his Vauxhall Corsa and manually wound down his window to call out, ‘Come on, plebs! The beach does await.’
I had always thought of the beach town as donkey rides, arcades that smell of old pennies, and eating fish and chips on the beach while you try to ignore the fact that your paper is full of sand and the seagulls are circling.
And it is all of those things, in the best possible way.
But Will, in his surprisingly tame driving, took a little detour just up the coast to a quiet spot away from the screams from the sea-front rides, to a section of beach that seemed like no one else knew existed.
Okay, maybe after five too many pot holes hit at full speed, I did end up clutching Jacob’s hand in my own sweaty palm, and then had to awkwardly peel myself off of him, but he didn’t seem to mind.
Another two cars, packed full of faces I vaguely recognised from Halloween parties past, and Alfie, were already there when we arrived.
Will, after Jacob reminded him to put his handbrake on, was the first to leap out of the car, greeting his friends and fussing about how many disposable barbecues to take down to the sand, and who was the strongest friend to carry the cool box that was apparently stuffed with meat.
‘Right, his driving was enough, but he’s going to be cooking too? I’ve seen enough of his barbecuing at Halloween parties to know that’s a hard pass from me’. I pulled a face at Jacob and he broke out into a laugh.
‘You really have no faith in him, do you?’ He chuckled. ‘Don’t worry, I don’t either. I packed us some sandwiches.’
‘Cheese and pickle?’ I grinned.
‘And a prawn cocktail crisp garnish, of course.’
‘I could kiss you!’ I patted him excitedly on the thigh and he blushed through his laughter. Before we could fall into an awkward silence, my door swung open, the sunlight flooded the car, and I had to squint to see the person behind it.
‘Adam!’ I only needed to see the shock of red hair to remember him from the last Halloween party. He kept me company through the night whilst everyone around us got a little too drunk, and he had been very punctual with texting me since. ‘How are you?’
I climbed out of the car to meet him, and I was grateful for the wide expanse of his rugby player shoulders as he shaded me from the beating sun.
‘Better, now I know you’re here and I’m not just stuck with all this lot.’ He pointed to his friends that had already started to wrestle in the thin layer of sand that covered the car park.
‘Honestly, I’ve been questioning why I agreed to this before I even got in the car,’ I said, shaking my head. I glanced back into the car for Jacob, but he must have climbed out the other side and had disappeared into the mass of testosterone.
‘Well, I, for one, am glad you did.’
I flushed. He’d been this flirty over text, but guys always seemed to have the confidence behind a screen but could never back it up in person. Adam, however, was seemingly an outlier, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little too flustered to reply.
‘Here, let me get those for you.’ Adam took my bag, towel, and shoes that I’d slipped off as soon as I had seen the sand. I thanked him softly, still struggling to find my voice.
‘Right everyone! Grab a bag, and let’s go,’ Will ordered the crowd as self-appointed leader, then scarpered down a dune and out of sight.
Jacob followed closely behind him, not noticing the hand that I raised to ask him to wait up.
Callum and Lizzie sauntered off with Alfie, as they always did.
I had no choice but to stick with Adam, and, in all honesty, I wasn’t complaining.
After a little trek through some fenced off dunes and an amble through some overgrown shrubbery, it began to make a little more sense as to why this beach was so secluded.
But with each incline and decline, Adam offered me his free hand – the other was still laden with all of my bags – and made his best effort not to let me fall.
We were the last to arrive at the camp, as conversations about his rugby team and my fashion projects took priority over our speed.
The barbecues were already lit by the time we reached the others.
Finding a spot next to Jacob, I sat down beside him, and Adam beside me, as our conversation didn’t even pause with the change of location.
‘I’d love to study in London, always have,’ Adam said.
‘You’re so lucky that it’s literally just your norm.
’ His face glistened with a coating of sweat, and he glowed delicately in the sun, the rays turning his red hair into strands of gold.
‘And it would be amazing to do a year or two aboard too. Somewhere in Europe, maybe.’
‘Ugh, yes,’ I promptly replied. ‘I’ve been looking at some courses in Italy, and the South of France. Imagine leaving your lessons and then you just get to cycle your way through the most beautiful cities on earth.’
‘Why would you want to spend all that money and travel so far for something when you could do just the same back here?’ Jacob butted into the conversation with his pessimism, and I was reminded of his attitude back in London.
I prickled. ‘The world is a far bigger place than this beach, or even London. If you actually let yourself try something new for once, you might realise how much is out there.’
‘Or, if you appreciated what you’ve actually got, you might not feel the need to want to run off every chance you get.’
I narrowed my eyes at him as the tension hardened between us.