Chapter 4
FOUR
THORNE
When Lucy stepped in the back door at the shop at six o’clock I was losing my fucking mind. By 6:01, I was outside and on my bike with a bag of donuts, heading to the dental clinic. It was easy to find, one Google search and a couple miles and there she was.
Now I’ve got her in front of me, fitting her beautiful head with a helmet as she stands there letting me do it, and my balls are begging for release.
“Thank you.” She pulls her lips to the side as she volleys a weak protest. “But you don’t really have to take me anywhere. I’ll just walk to the bus stop—I can get the 7:20.” She raises her arm to point back toward the shop where the bus stop anchors the corner there.
I stifle a chuckle. No way, my little bird. If she thinks I’m letting her go anywhere without me, she’s the one who’s lost her mind. She’s never getting away, I know that for sure. Rational thought has left me and what’s in its place is pure instinct. Gut. Plain and simple.
And I always follow my gut. The times when I haven’t, that’s when my life’s gotten fucked up.
“Okay, tell me the truth. You want to get on the back of this bike with me? Or you want to take the bus?”
“I don’t even know you.” Her lips fight a grin and she juts one hip out.
I’m grinning because I can tell she only said what she thought she should say. Anyway, it wasn’t a ‘no,’ it was just a statement of fact. I can work with that.
She looks so fucking cute with the black helmet on, the tightness of the strap under her chin only accentuating the cherub roundness of her face. Her lips are as perfect as any fantasy I could have conjured. The dark waves of her hair splitting down the front and back of her shoulders as she clutches her purse to her ample chest.
I ponder her comment for another moment as I decide the steps I’m going to take to bring her to me in every way. She’s mine and nothing makes more sense than to convince her of that fact right now.
No time like the present.
Just as her chest rises on an inhale, I put my mouth on hers, sweeping my tongue across her bottom lip, tasting the first of what will be a lifetime of kisses. A desperate breath spills from her mouth and I suck it in deep, making her part of me in that moment.
My forehead bumps the top of the helmet as I slip a hand behind her neck, supporting the weight of her head and angling her into the heat of the kiss that is lighting up my darkest corners.
Our tongues meet and for a moment my heart stops. Her sigh fills my ears and directly connects to the tightening in my balls.
I withdraw. Not because I want to, oh no. I’d take her sweet, ripe ass right here on the street if I had my way.
It’s because for the first time in my life, I see the future. I’m a fucking felon, tattooed son-of-a-bitch that never once saw what I have just now seen the second our lips met.
What did I see? Goddamn picket fence, diaper changes, and college funds.
“Wow.” It’s like her glowing green eyes are lit from behind. There’s a fire in there that needs to be fanned and I’m just the guy to do it. “You know how to deliver donuts.”
I can’t help but laugh. “Like I said in there, you’re a VIP. And I’m at your service, so hop on. Where do you live? I’m taking you home to change clothes, then I’m taking you out.”
I give her a second to absorb that that’s without a doubt a statement, not a question, and she raises one eyebrow before tipping her head to the right and giving me the first of what will be a million of her smiles. The ones she’s saved her whole life just for me. Those smiles.
“Ferguson and Twenty-Second. But you have to tell me one thing first…”
The street names bring back memories. Something else we have in common. I used to live over in that same area It’s low rent, but decent.
“Anything,” I reply and the truth is I would tell her anything. Even the shit I don’t think she wants to know. I brace myself for whatever her question may be. And the consequences of my answer.
She gives me a dubious stare as she asks, “Are you expecting a tip?”
Having her arms around my waist feels like coming home. As though she needs me and I can’t even explain how that makes me feel.
A swell of protectiveness overtakes me. Keeping her safe means more to me than any business success or other lofty goal. I want to know what she ate for breakfast, if she slept well. I want to know when she’s sad or angry and be the confidant she chooses. Her arms around my waist mean more than just her holding on for this short ride.It means she needs me. Nothing more powerful has ever swept through me like that thought.
The late summer wind is cooling my face, and my little bird is hanging onto me as we make our way through the city streets. I’m so damn proud to have her on the back of my bike. I want to show her off to the world. Show them what I already know is mine.
I feel her press her head into my back and squeeze a bit tighter as I round a turn onto her street. Damn, it feels good. Then I see what’s up ahead.
In front of us, flashing yellow, blue and red lights in a blinding mass take me straight back to that day my world changed. I grit my teeth against the memory and shake it off. Slowing my bike toward the barricades at the corner, I think about my breathing for a moment. Center myself.
Cops and utility workers, fire trucks and people are swarming everywhere. I’ve made my peace with the cops in this town, but it’s a tenuous truce. Too much history there on both sides. I don’t expect special treatment but I’m no longer on their radar either.
As I get off the bike, CeeCee’s wide eyes take in the chaos. This is where she lives, but I have no idea if she’s going to be allowed into her place. Something big is going on. I help her off the bike, unhook her helmet. She needs someone to take care of her, now and for the next hundred or so years.
The look of fear and confusion in her eyes makes my heart ache. I want to scoop her up and hold her against me and make sure she never fears anything ever again. But I can’t, not yet. Instead, I lean down and give her a soft kiss. She lets me do it, and I stroke her hair for a moment until her lips soften under mine.
“Stay here,” I whisper, “and don’t worry. I’ll go ask what’s going on, okay?”
She nods, and I turn to see a tiny woman scurrying our way. It’s been years, but I immediately recognize Mrs. Takashima. I know this neighborhood well, and she’s an old friend, one of my many pseudo mothers from when I ran the streets as a young punk.
She used to feed me and lecture me like I was her own. Everyone knew my mother, or lack thereof, and some took pity on me as I tried to grow up out here. One of the few good things I had in my life. We keep in touch even now. I try to pry her away from her grocery at least once a month for lunch, but she loves her work almost as much as I love mine.
“Thorne? CeeCee? What?” Mrs. Takashima’s excitement shows in the increase in pitch with each word. CeeCee steps up as I look from one to the other. “CeeCee, you can’t go inside. There a gas leak, the whole block closed. The building closed.”
“What happened?” I ask, leaning over to set a hand on CeeCee’s shoulder as she crosses her arms and bites her lip.
Mrs. Takashima shrugs. “Don’t know. Gas line broken. They say two days. Maybe more. No one can go in.”
“You two know each other?” I look at both women and they nod at each other, then look back at me.
“Mrs. Takashima rents me a room above her grocery. She’s become my second mother.”
The irony is not lost on me nor Mrs. Takashima. I can tell she’s worked something out in her head, and that’s cool with me. She smiles at me with her signature broad—but rare—smile and I see she’s lost a couple more teeth over the last few years. “Thorne rented that same room from me. It was many moons ago, but seems something funny going on here.” She laughs and puts her hands on her cheeks.
CeeCee looks up at me and I shake my head before answering in a low voice. “Means some things are just meant to be.”
Mrs. Takashima reaches up and slaps my face a couple times with her tiny hand before pointing at my nose. “You good boy, Thorne. I knew you make something with yourself. But, your donut too expensive though.” Her pointed finger turns to a wagging one. “I not pay that much for donut.” She chides with a stern look then quickly looks at CeeCee. “You trust him, he take care of you, CeeCee. He good boy.” The old woman smiles and her eyes squint almost shut. She pats my chest. “You take care of her?”
“It’s my privilege.” I nod. Neither of them realize just what that means to me. Taking care of her isn’t just a moment, it’s a lifetime, and I intend to make sure she has everything she needs.
Without warning, a boom shakes the ground.
At first, I don’t react, like my brain is too busy trying to work it out than to actually do anything about it. It’s like everything is moving slowly. I see glass shards catching the light as they spray from some window down the street, emergency personnel dropping to the ground as their hands move to cover their heads.
CeeCee. Her name pops into my head and I turn, shouting something as I grab for her, covering her with my body and reaching out an open hand to claw at Mrs. Takashima’s clothing, but she’s already running the wrong way, towards the danger, not away from it, and I can’t get a grip.
She’s screaming something, but I don’t know if it’s words or just sound. All I can do is pull CeeCee down, shielding her from harm.
A fireball explodes into the sky down the street, and I turn my head away from it, feeling the heat on my cheek, my back. I’m familiar with the buildings here, and it’s not Mrs. Takashima’s, not the same room I used to rent where CeeCee now lives. But it’s damn close. Too close.
There’s no way she’s getting back in her place any time soon. My heart is pounding, thinking about the danger she was in, but my brain is racing and punching the air because it’s made a startling jump in logic. She can’t go back to her place and that means she needs somewhere else to stay.
Lucky me.
That’s it, I grab CeeCee, shove the helmet back on her head and before she can protest, I’ve got us back on the bike and we are flying in the opposite direction. The thought of her being hurt gives me tunnel vision and the only purpose in my life at this moment is to make sure she’s safe.
Her grip around my waist is tighter than ever as I scream the bike down the streets. I know exactly where I’m going now, it’s where I’ve wanted her from the moment I caught that first glimpse in the store. I only hope she’s ready because a beast is coming alive inside of me, and she’s the only beauty that can soothe his savage needs.
Ten minutes through town and I’m pulling into the underground garage of my building. Her hold on me hasn’t lessened; if anything it’s grown tighter, firmer, more confident. Need flames within me and I don’t pretend to understand it all, but this girl is mine and I may know nothing about her, but I feel it. In the marrow of my bones it solidifies like cement.
I kick the stand and help her down after dismounting myself. “You okay?”
The tears in her eyes says it all. Those tears hurt me more than any loss I’ve ever experienced. I hate them. I want to be the one that guards her for the rest of her life against anything that might bring tears to those beautiful eyes.
“Hey, you’re safe now.”
“Everything I own was in that room. It could all be gone.”
I stroke a hand over her cheek. “Look, I can’t be sure, but from what I saw, Mrs. Takashima’s building survived. I think your stuff will be okay, but even if it isn’t, things can be replaced. You are safe, that’s what matters. Look at me.” I use the pad of my thumb to scoop up the tears that squeeze out of her eyes. “You can’t be replaced. This is my place; I want you to think of it as your place too. At least for now. You heard Mrs. Takashima, right?”
CeeCee nods and takes a deep breath.
“Does that woman tell the truth even when you don’t want to hear it?”
The giggle that tumbles from her lips lights up my heart. “Oh yeah. She doesn’t mince words.”
“She told you to trust me. And you can trust me, CeeCee. I won’t hurt you. You’ll stay here with me, where I can keep you safe. You can stay as long as you need to. Then we can figure out what is next when you feel ready.”
She nods, taking a deep, calming breath. “Okay. Thank you.”
I reach down to take her hand and guide her to the private elevator that runs up to my two floors of loft space. I own the building as well. Bought it a couple years ago for a song. It was in terrible shape, but my private residence is here. I own two other places, one is a rustic cabin about a hundred and fifty miles up north on Lake Swanson. The other is just this little hut in Fiji which I bought two months ago on a whim and haven’t been back since.
Inside the elevator, I listen to her steady breathing, watch her eyes dart from wall to floor and never at me. I’m not sure what that means, but for my part I’m captivated. My own eyes never leave her.
The ding of the elevator announces our arrival at my place. I intend to rehab the other floors of the building eventually, but for now, I’m the only one that lives here. Something that’s never bothered me before clicks in the back of my mind. If she’s going to be staying here, I need to figure out some sort of security. Never worried about it until now.
The loft is all brick and industrial elements, with warm wood and splashes of color everywhere. The walls are covered in canvases. I’m a reformed thug who makes donuts and paints in his spare time. This is my church, and I’ve now found my muse.
“Wow. This is amazing.” She nods with a sideways grin on her pink lips. “Not what I expected.”
“What did you expect?”
“Uhhh, clothes on the floor. Empty pizza boxes, beer cans, the TV still on.” CeeCee spins in a slow circle. “Maybe a couple loose chickens running around. Something burning. You know, the usual bachelor stuff.”
“Disappointed?”
“Meh. Dunno yet.” Shrugging, she pokes a finger toward me as her lips twist into an impish grin and she wraps herself tighter around my heart.
I guide her with a hand in the small of her back into the main open space, then through to the gleaming kitchen. She puts her purse down on the counter and I move in front of her, unable to keep my hands from settling on her waist.
“On three, jump.” I raise my eyebrows and wait for her to acknowledge me with her eyes. “One, two, three…”
I lift and she giggles and jumps. I set her amazing ass on the counter, watching the way her tits bounce.
With her sweet ass settled on the counter, I lean over to slip a bottle of red from the wine cabinet. I’ve been saving this Bordeaux for a special occasion, and this certainly feels special. My mouth is watering but it’s not the thought of the wine, it’s the thought of her sweet flavor spreading over my tongue. The warmth of her slick opening as my tongue dives inside the first time, drinking in pure joy.
“Thorne, I’ve been thinking…I’m not sure I should stay here. I mean, this is a little crazy, right? You show up at my work, pretend to be my date for the evening, and now here I am. I barely know you. I’m really grateful, but I’m just not sure this is smart. Even with Mrs. Takashima’s endorsement…”
Her eyes are wide, sincere, and I can sense the struggle that’s going on inside her, so I nod. She needs to know that I’m not a danger, I get that.
“Do you have somewhere else safe I can take you?”
I turn and uncork the bottle with a soft pop, watching her face from the corner of my eye as she ponders my question. I can see the answer already though; it’s written in her features.
“Guess not.” With a shrug we put that to rest.
I notice her earrings are tiny donuts with pink icing and colored sprinkles.
“Love those earrings.” My pulse is racing being this close to her. She’s got me undone and it’s hard as fuck to keep my cool.
One of her hands goes to her sweet earlobe. “Yeah. The funny thing, I’ve had these for years. I just put them on today after not wearing them for probably two years. That’s weird huh? The donut earrings must have sent out some signal and then, poof, the Donut King delivered my donuts. If I’d known that, I would have put them on a long time ago. Saved me a shit ton in donut money.”
“Maybe. I see if I can hook you up with a discount card or something.”
“Ahh, mighty big of you.” Her sarcasm mixes with the twinkle in her eyes.
I finish pouring the wine and hand her the glass as we eye each other with playful smiles.
She takes the glass from me when it’s offered, and I step closer to her, feeling the tension grow between us as she sits on the counter like my own precious doll. Her eyes are deep set, a green that must be seen to be believed. They sparkle under the kitchen spotlights. Her skin is the smoothest, deepest olive, but there’s a hint of pink on her cheeks and it makes me hope I’m the one responsible for that blush.
I hold up my glass and her lips curl with a quizzical grin, but she follows my lead.
“Here’s to us.” I wait for her to raise her glass.
She adds, “And to donut destiny.”
Those golden flecks sparkle to life again, and I don’t miss how she presses her legs together and shifts a tiny bit in her seat on the counter. The wine glass touches her lips, but she doesn’t drink. Instead our eyes stay locked.
No one ever made me feel this way. No one. Not ever.