Chapter 18 #2
I tense, understanding the subtext. In wolf society, the alpha pair represents the pack’s future. If defeat seems inevitable, the Alpha Female would traditionally be evacuated to ensure the bloodline continues.
“I’m not leaving,” I say before Ryker can respond, drawing startled looks from around the table. “If the pack fights, I fight. If the pack falls, I fall with it.”
Through our bond, I feel Ryker’s warring emotions—pride versus protective instinct, approval alongside concern.
All will be well, I tell him silently.
I can’t risk you, he responds. I’m sorry, Kitara.
What? No!
“We’ll establish a guard for Kitara,” Ryker says, despite my silent protests. “If the worst comes, they will take her to the European packs. She should be safe there.”
“As you wish,” Lithia acknowledges after a moment, inclining her head.
I sit silently, seething as the council continues to discuss specific tactical decisions. I listen intently, occasionally offering insights based on what I’ve seen in my visions. The senior wolves consider my contributions seriously, integrating them into their planning without hesitation.
Their confidence makes Ryker’s decision even more infuriating.
By the time the meeting concludes, the hour is late. My head throbs with information, even if my heart is sick at Ryker’s lack of faith.
We have a plan. We have allies. We have a chance.
If only Ryker could trust in me.
As the council disperses, my mate keeps me at his side, his hand a warm presence at the small of my back. Zella approaches, bowing.
“Alpha Female,” she addresses me formally. “I’ve been assigned to your security detail during the preparations. If you’re willing, I’d like to begin training you in basic defense techniques.”
“I need a security detail?”
She grins. “Not when I’m done with you. But in the meantime, we’ll work together on how to protect yourself in human form,” she counters. “You don’t need claws to be dangerous.”
“When do we start?”
“Now, if you’re not too tired,” Zella suggests. “The training hall should be relatively empty at this hour.”
I can feel Ryker’s desire to keep me near, but my anger at him overrides any wish I have to be near him right now.
“Let’s do it.”
As Zella leads me through the corridors toward the training hall, I’m struck by how different I feel from the wolf I was just days ago. In Silvercrest, I would never have been included in war councils, never offered combat training, never treated as an equal.
“Something amusing?” Zella asks, noticing my smile.
“Just reflecting on how quickly life can change,” I reply honestly.
Her answering smile is warm. “For the better, I hope?”
“Definitely.” The certainty in my voice surprises even me. Even in my anger, I know that Ryker is only doing what he thinks is best.
I forgive you, I tell him.
It doesn’t feel like it, he responds, his tone wry.
Well, you’ve yet to apologize for being an ass.
His chuckle is warm in my mind. I won’t apologize for protecting you, Kitara. I love my pack, but I cannot live without you.
His response douses some of the heat from my anger.
Next time, speak to me before making decisions about my future. I might not convince you of a different path, but surely we can come to some kind of compromise?
That I can promise to do.
The tension between us eases, and I follow Zella into the training room with a lighter step.
“We’ll start with the basics,” she says, moving to the center of the floor. “Stance, balance, leverage. You don’t have a wolf’s strength, but you have other advantages.”
“Like what?” I ask skeptically.
“You’re smaller, potentially faster if trained properly. Your center of gravity is lower.” She circles me, assessing. “And your sight is an advantage, as Lithia and Dane can attest.”
I grin. My lessons in predicting their movements have come along in leaps and bounds, so much so Lithia hasn’t managed to land a hand on me in two days.
Zella takes a fighting stance. “Now, let’s see what you’re working with. Try to hit me.”
The next hour passes in a blur of instruction, correction, and repetition. Zella proves a patient but demanding teacher, showing me how to use an opponent’s size and strength against them, how to target vulnerable points, how to fall without injury when thrown.
To my surprise, I find myself enjoying the physical exertion after days of mental training. There’s something liberating about learning to defend myself actively rather than always relying on my visions.
“You’re a quick study,” Zella comments as we take a water break. “Most beginners struggle more with the basic forms.”
I wipe sweat from my brow, pleasantly exhausted. “I’ve spent a lifetime observing how wolves move. Maybe some of it rubbed off.”
Her head tilts thoughtfully. “Maybe.”
Before I can respond, the training hall door opens to admit a group of younger wolves—perhaps only six or seven years old by the look of them, led by an older male I recognize from the council meeting.
“Alpha Female,” they greet me with varying degrees of awkwardness and respect.
The instructor inclines his head. “We didn’t mean to interrupt your training.”
“We were just finishing,” Zella assures him, then turns to me with a smile. “Same time tomorrow?”
I nod, grateful for both the session and her friendship. As we leave the training hall, I notice the young wolves watching me with undisguised curiosity.
On impulse, I cross to them, smiling at their instructor. “May I be introduced?”
For the next few minutes, the bubbly pups surround me, asking questions and chatting about their lessons. They’re enthusiastic and adorable bundles of arms and legs.
“They’ll be talking about this for days,” Zella comments as we walk toward the bathing chambers.
“About what?” I ask, still learning the intricacies of pack protocol.
“Meeting you. In most packs it’s unheard of for youngsters to meet an alpha. Wasn’t it like that in your pack?”
I shrug. “I wouldn’t know. I wasn’t exactly integrated into the pack hierarchy.”
Zella nods. “Well, let me tell you, it’s very unusual.”
“How long have you been with the pack?” I ask as we enter the bathing chamber, the mineral-rich pools steaming invitingly.
“Five years,” she answers, stripping efficiently and sliding into the water. “They took me in when no one else would.”
I follow her example, easing my sore muscles into the heated pool with a grateful sigh. “What happened?”
A shadow crosses her face. “My original pack was... traditional. Females were expected to know their place and to submit to the strongest males regardless of preference.” Her fingers trace patterns in the water’s surface.
“I refused a claiming. Fought back when forced. They cast me out—damaged goods, as they said.”
My heart aches for her. “I’m sorry.”
She shrugs, the gesture deliberately casual though pain lingers in her eyes.
“Ryker found me half dead from silver poisoning. Brought me back to the Shadowmist, healed me, offered me a place.” Her smile returns.
“Here, I’m valued for my tracking skills, not my breeding potential. It’s a nice change.”
It’s no wonder we’ve connected so quickly—our journeys, while different, share common threads of pain and a desire to belong.
“That’s why you’re so loyal to him,” I observe.
“To him. To the pack.” She meets my gaze directly. “And now to you.”
The simple declaration warms me. In Zella, I’ve found not just an instructor but a true friend—something I’ve never had in the Silvercrest Pack, where I was kept isolated and apart.
We finish our bath, dress in clean clothes, and part ways at the corridor junction that leads to the alpha’s chambers.
“Tomorrow,” Zella reminds me. “Don’t be late. I won’t go easy on you just because you’re sore.”
I laugh, enjoying her teasing. “I wouldn’t expect you to.”
When I reach our chambers, I find Ryker already there, studying maps spread across the table. He looks up at my entrance, his mismatched eyes taking in my damp hair and relaxed posture.
“Training went well?” he asks.
“Better than expected,” I admit, moving to examine the maps over his shoulder. “Zella’s a good teacher.”
“She’s one of our best.” His hand finds my waist, drawing me against his side. “How are you feeling after the council? Do I need to apologize in person?”
I consider his question. “Yes to apologizing. As for the rest, I’m overwhelmed. Nervous. But... ready, I think.”
“The senior wolves were impressed by your contributions. Even Lithia commented.”
“Really?” I can’t hide my surprise. Lithia’s respect feels like a significant achievement given her initial hostility.
Ryker’s thumb traces small circles at my waist, a casual intimacy that has lazy warmth spreading through me. “You’re proving yourself to them. Earning your place not just as my mate, but as a leader in your own right.”
The assessment makes me uncomfortable, though I’m not sure why. “I’m just trying to help.”
He lifts me, carrying me across to sit me on his desk before stepping between my legs. “That’s what makes you a true leader. Many in positions of power take, but true leaders serve. They don’t do this for power or influence—they accept this mantle because it’s the best way to serve our people.”
I think of the Silvercrest Pack, where Alpha Varick led through fear and dominance, taking whatever he wanted without consideration for his pack’s wellbeing. Ryker’s approach couldn’t be more different—his power tempered by responsibility, his strength used to shield rather than subjugate.
“Tomorrow we begin strategizing,” he says, changing the subject. “Combining your visions with tactical response.”
“More work in the East Chamber?” I ask, thinking of our previous sessions.
“No. The Vision Well.”
I tense, remembering the overwhelming intensity of my last experience there. “I see.”
“If you’re uncomfortable we don’t have to do it.”
“No, I want to. It’s just… different to anything I’ve experienced before.”
His hand comes up to cup my face. “I won’t push you beyond your limits. I’ll be there with you every time. And if you say you don’t want to, then that’s fine. We’ll find another way.”
“I know.” I press a kiss to his cheek. “But promise you’ll pull me out if it becomes too much.”
“Always.”
As we share a quiet dinner in our rooms, discussing strategy and training plans, I realize how quickly I’ve adapted to this new life. Now I’m contributing to war councils, being treated as a true Alpha Female.
The woman I was in the Silvercrest Pack wouldn’t recognize the woman I’m becoming here.
The thought pleases my wolf.
See? You are more here. A mate cannot harm.
Later, as darkness falls over the mountains and the pack settles into their night routines, Ryker pulls me close in our bed. His arms encircle me from behind, his chest a solid wall of heat against my back. The claiming bond hums between us, stronger and more defined with each passing day.
“Rest,” he murmurs against my hair. “Tomorrow will demand much from both of us.”
The gentle touch of desire whispers along my skin, but he’s right. I’m far too tired to give him my full attention. Instead, I nestle closer, drawing comfort from his presence.
In ten days, the new moon will rise. Thaddeus and his army will come. Blood will be spilled and fates decided.
But tonight, in the arms of the Shadowmist alpha, I’m safe.