Chapter 30 Mo
Mo
I’m hiding in my room when Elias bursts through the door without knocking. Typical alpha behaviour.
“Get up, Blueberry! We’re going on an adventure.” His eyes have that mischievous light that usually means trouble.
I pull the blanket over my head. “Not interested.”
“Come on.” He yanks the blanket away. “You’ve been moping in here for two days.”
“I’m not moping. I’m contemplating the universe.”
“While staring at the ceiling and sighing dramatically?”
I glare at him. “I do not sigh dramatically.”
“You absolutely do.” He drops onto the edge of my bed, making the whole thing bounce. “Look, I know going into town was a lot, and it freaked you out—”
“I wasn’t freaked out.”
“Sure.”
He doesn’t believe me.
“But you can’t hide in here forever.”
I sit up, ready to tell him to fuck off, but it’s just Elias being Elias. Persistent and annoying and somehow impossible to stay mad at.
“Fine,” I groan. “What’s this adventure?”
His face lights up. “It’s a surprise.”
“I hate surprises.”
“You’ll like this one.” He’s already pulling me to my feet. “Come on, put your shoes on.”
Ten minutes later, we’re heading into the woods.
“This better not be some weird alpha bonding ritual,” I mutter, ducking under a low-hanging branch.
Elias laughs. “What would that even look like? Blood sacrifices? Howling at the moon? Comparing knot sizes?”
“Gross.” But I’m smiling.
He moves fast, holding my hand, and on the rough path, I have to jog to keep up. His energy is infectious.
“Would it kill you to slow down?”
“Where’s the fun in that? Besides, we’re almost there.”
“Almost where? The middle of nowhere?”
“Patience, little omega.”
“Call me that again, and I’ll show you exactly how patient I can be with my foot up your ass.”
He just grins wider. God, this male is gorgeous.
The trees begin to thin, and we step into a clearing. Elias stops, waiting for me to look up. I’m about to launch into another complaint when I see them. Hundreds of fireflies floating through the air, their tiny bodies blinking yellow-green against the darkness.
“Holy shit,” I say.
“Cat got your tongue, Blue?” Elias teases.
I try to recover. “Seen one firefly, you’ve seen them all.”
“Liar.” He steps closer, and I don’t back away. “You love it.”
I do. I fucking love it.
The fireflies dance around us, lighting and fading in their silent rhythm. Beautiful.
“Maybe,” I admit, sinking onto the grass.
Elias sits beside me. Close enough that I can feel his warmth.
“I found this place when I was a boy,” he says. “They come back every year, same spot.”
We sit in silence for a while, watching the light show. Peaceful in a way I didn’t know was possible around Elias. Usually, he’s all motion and noise and terrible jokes. But right now, he’s just present.
“I haven’t shown anyone this place before,” he says quietly, his eyes still on the fireflies. “Not even the guys.”
Something in his voice makes me turn to look at him. The usual cockiness is gone.
“Why me?”
He shrugs, plucking at the grass. “Because you belong here with us, and I want to show you that you can trust me.” His eyes find mine in the dim light. “Maybe you’re not ready to hear that, but it’s true. You do fit with us, Blue. You fit with me.”
I don’t know what to say, so I stay quiet, watching the tiny lights blink around us. It’s quiet for a few minutes; peaceful in the cool night air, sitting next to Elias.
“When the coup happened,” he finally says, “I was only eleven.”
My breath catches.
“Everyone talks about how brave Darius was, how he stepped up and saved what was left of the packs. And he did.” Elias’s voice drops lower. “But nobody talks about how I hid in a closet and pissed myself.”
I turn to face him. This isn’t the Elias I know—the one who jokes and flirts and never takes anything seriously.
“I was so scared,” he says, his eyes on the ground. “I could hear screaming from outside. My mom grabbed me and told me to hide in the closet. She told me not to come out, no matter what I heard. So I stayed hidden, even when I heard her begging for her life.”
His voice breaks on the last word, and my chest aches.
“Elias—”
“Darius found me hours later. He caught one of the traitors sneaking into our house, looking for survivors or loot. Who knows? I could hear him crashing around, knocking stuff over. I was terrified he would find me. And he would have eventually, if not for Darius.”
I glance over at Elias, but his eyes go distant.
“I watched through the crack in the closet door as Darius killed him, tore his throat out with his bare hands. When I finally came out, blood was everywhere.”
I can picture it. Teenage Darius, covered in blood, is fighting for his life and the lives of everyone left.
“He saved me,” Elias says. “And I just sat there. Frozen. Couldn’t even make a sound.”
I reach out and touch his hand. I don’t know why I do it, but it feels right. “You were a child.”
“Yeah. But after that, I decided I’d never be that scared again. I’d never be that… useless.” He gives a hollow laugh. “I never wanted anyone to feel that scared, so I became the funny one. The clown. The one who keeps everyone’s spirits up. Because that’s what I could do.”
His hand turns over beneath mine, our fingers intertwining.
“I know you think I’m just a shallow flirt who can’t take anything seriously,” he says. “And most of the time, that’s exactly what I want people to think. It’s easier. But with you…” He pauses. “With you, I’d like to be more than that.”
I’m about to answer when he jumps to his feet.
“Come on,” he says, holding out his hand. “Let’s catch some.”
I grab his hand, following him into the center of the clearing where the fireflies are thickest. We chase them like idiots, laughing when they escape our grasp, cursing when we trip over uneven terrain.
I can’t remember the last time I laughed like this.
Full and free, without having to watch my back.
“Got one!” I cup my hands around a firefly, feeling its tiny body bumping against my palms.
Elias leans in close, his face inches from mine. “Make a wish,” he says.
I close my eyes. What do I wish for? Safety? Freedom? More mashed potatoes?
When I open them, Elias is watching me with an intensity that makes my skin flush. “What did you wish for?” he asks.
I open my hands, releasing the firefly. It spirals up into the darkness, blinking as it goes. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”
His fingers brush against mine, and a jolt runs up my arm. “Maybe I would.”
His eyes drop to my lips for just a second.
I close the gap before my brain can overrule my body.
My hand finds the front of his shirt, fists the fabric, and pulls him down to me.
His lips meet mine and move with confidence, warm and sure and a little bit reckless, the way he does everything, and it feels so damn good.
I pull back first. Not because I want to, but because I need to breathe, and also because if I keep kissing him, I’m going to do something stupid like climb him in the middle of a firefly clearing.
His eyes are wide, and for once in his life, he doesn’t have a witty comeback ready. Lips parted, chest rising and falling fast, staring at me like I just told him the earth is flat and proved it.
“Don’t,” I say, pointing a finger at his face.
“Don’t what?”
“Don’t say anything. Don’t make it a thing. Don’t compose a sonnet. Don’t tell the others.”
His mouth twitches. “Can I at least breathe?”
“Debatable.”
He lets out a shaky laugh, running a hand through his curls. “Blueberry, you just kissed me.”
“I’m aware.”
“You kissed me.”
“I’m already regretting it.”
“No, you’re not.”
He’s right. I’m not. And it’s taking all of my willpower not to do it again.
“We should head back.”
He nods. “Yeah, probably should. Wouldn’t want the others to think I’ve stolen you away for good.”
I glance at him as we walk, and he catches me looking and smiles. Not his usual cocky grin, but something softer.
“What?” he asks.
“Nothing.” I look away to hide the blush rising in my cheeks. “Just making sure you don’t get us lost.”
“I never get lost.” He bumps his shoulder against mine. “I just take scenic detours.”
I roll my eyes, but I’m smiling again.
The smile fades almost as soon as I feel it.
I’m happy. For the first time in years, I’m genuinely happy.
And it absolutely terrifies me.
Happiness is dangerous. Happiness makes you soft. Happiness makes you forget to watch the shadows, to check the exits, to keep one hand on a weapon at all times.
Happiness gets you killed.
I think about my mother, who was happy until the new alpha arrived.
I think about Sophie, who smiled, laughed, and believed things would be okay. Right up until the moment they crushed her throat.
I think about sixteen-year-old Mo, who was happy for exactly one month before the world taught her that happiness is a lie that predators tell you right before they strike.
I slow my steps, and the warmth of the fireflies and Elias’s kiss drains out of me so fast it makes me sick.
No. Absolutely not. I am not doing this. I am not settling in. I am not letting a few pretty lights and one stupid kiss and a pack of overgrown alpha idiots trick me into forgetting what they are.
By the time we reach the cabin, the decision is already made.
I’m leaving.