Chapter 23
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
ZAVIER
M y best friend was drowning in his inner battle of finding Dante. I’d been with Slash most of the day, and he’d dropped me off at the Thieves’ compound on his way home so I could go with Ander.
If I could convince him to leave the damn computers, anyway.
“He skipped lunch,” Drake said under his breath once he’d let me in, making me cringe. He’d skipped breakfast on his way out the door too.
“I’ll make sure he eats at home. I take it you’ve had no luck?” I asked, and he shook his head.
“Nope. He’s losing it, dude. He almost charged out the door today after he thought he saw him on a camera. Barely even looked like Dante, but he was adamant it was him. He needs to get some decent sleep.”
We walked into the office, and I found Ander right where he’d been all damn week, searching through footage that we’d already gone over a thousand times.
He’d managed to hold off his freak-out this long, but he was obviously close to snapping for real. The situation with Blake was only making it worse.
Drake sat at his own computer and put a headset on, getting back to work on whatever thieving job he’d been supervising, leaving me to walk past the others towards Ander.
“Hey,” I murmured, but he barely acknowledged me. His finger stopped scrolling on the mouse for two seconds, then he got right back to it. “Lavaro.”
“I’m busy.”
I took no offense to him brushing me off. If I’d given a fuck about my brother, I probably would’ve reacted the same.
Except I was glad that mine was dead because my brother was a piece of shit.
I moved closer, needing to ground him in a way that he’d snap out of it. Touching him was risky, he could start swinging if he was really as bad as Drake thought, but I slid my fingers into his hair and massaged his scalp.
His scrolling halted again and his shoulders dropped a fraction, letting the exhaustion show. He was running on fumes and at least needed to eat something decent.
“You’re no good to him like this,” I said when he stayed quiet, continuing to move my fingers through his hair.
“I have to find him, Zav. He’s been gone too long without a word,” he said tightly, but there was no fight in his tone.
“If he was dead, Stefano definitely would’ve sent you proof to make you spiral,” Stone said as he appeared, crossing his arms. “I’m kicking you out for the rest of the night, man. Go home, eat a decent meal, sleep a full night, and you can come back freshly showered tomorrow after breakfast.”
Ander’s fist clenched on the desk, and I sighed. “Taking a swing at him will only get you kicked out indefinitely, dude. Not to mention Stone’s hit is as hard as yours. C’mon, we’ll head home and get a good sleep.”
“I don’t need?—”
“If you want to send yourself crazy and start chasing hallucinations, be my guest,” I replied, cutting him off. “But just so you know, you’re upsetting Raven. She asked me if I’d heard from you earlier because you’re ignoring her messages. She’s worried, and she knows you’re not sleeping properly.”
He pulled his eyes off the screen, glancing back at me and knocking my hand away from his hair. “She doesn’t need to worry.”
“Doesn’t she?”
He stared at me for a moment before sighing, glancing back at the screen one more time before closing out of the footage and pushing his chair back. “Fine.”
Stone rolled his eyes but gave me a nod, seeming thankful that I was getting Ander out of there, and I was surprised with how little convincing I had to do to get him to actually walk out the door.
He was on autopilot, his movements robotic and jerky as we headed outside towards his car.
“Are you okay to drive? You—” I barely finished my sentence before his keys hit my chest, falling to the ground at my feet. I’d driven his car before, but that was only because he’d been too damn drunk and I’d basically had to wrestle the keys away from him.
He really hated people driving his car.
I quickly grabbed the keys and moved towards the driver’s side, thankful when he silently climbed into the passenger seat without prompting.
We’d just pulled out onto the road when he spoke, his voice bitter. “She was always better off without me.”
“What nonsense are you saying now?” I grumbled, glancing at him as I drove.
“Raven. I should’ve just let her keep hating me.”
“What the hell has gotten into you? If this is you announcing you’re going to break up with her when we get to the house?—”
His eyes snapped to mine, and I was almost a little afraid that he’d shoot me. He really wasn’t acting like himself, his body and mind were too damn exhausted.
“I wouldn’t do that to her. I just mean if I hadn’t made her not hate me, she wouldn’t be stressing about me right now.”
“Maybe not, but I would be, which would stress her out anyway,” I said seriously.
“None of this would’ve happened without me. Reid wouldn’t have gotten hurt, Stefano wouldn’t be after any of you, and?—”
“You’re being dramatic,” I said bluntly, earning a glare. “Getting pissed off at yourself isn’t helping anything. Don’t be saying shit like that around Raven, understood? She’s already a little confused about her feelings about you and Blake, so don’t add to it by making her think you really are doubting your feelings.”
“I’m not fucking doubting them.”
“No? Then stop making it sound like you regret her,” I snapped, making him wince.
“I’m just tired and?—”
“I know, which is why you’re going to eat and sleep. Let Raven fuss over you too, it makes her feel better to know she’s helping.”
“Is she home?”
“She got home an hour ago, she’s been with Rory for most of the day,” I answered, driving into Ashburn Valley. “Focus your frustration onto those who deserve it. We’re going to find Dante, Ander. He’s not dead, Blake either.”
His jaw was clenched tight at the mention of Blake, his eyes shifting out the window. “They could’ve done anything to her by now, Lopez. You don’t get it.”
“I don’t get it?” I asked with a bitter laugh. “You mean me? Who grew up being passed around my father’s men like a nice little treat?”
I saw him flinch out of the corner of my eye, his voice dropping. “Sorry, I just?—”
“If anyone understands those things, it’s me,” I growled, my knuckles turning white on the steering wheel. “I hope like hell that they haven’t touched Blake, I really do, but don’t say I don’t get it, asshole. I probably get it more than you ever could.”
“Pull over.”
“No.”
“Pull the fuck over or I’ll make you crash my car right this second,” he barked, giving me a moment to decide. I considered ignoring him, but I pulled over and yanked the handbrake on, turning to glare at him.
“What?”
“I’m sorry,” he repeated, holding my gaze. “You never talk about it. I didn’t mean to trigger you.”
“Why the fuck would I talk about it? It’s the past, I can’t change it. They’re all dead and gone, dude. Am I supposed to be walking around, shaking like a leaf at every loud noise? Put a stamp on my forehead that says I’m fragile because my daddy let people molest me? It was years ago. It doesn’t visit me in my dreams or jump into my mind randomly throughout the day. I dealt with it, and then I moved on.”
“Why are you biting my head off then if it doesn’t bother you?” he deadpanned, and I forced myself to calm down.
“I’m just saying I get how serious the shit with Blake is. I want to find her in one piece too.”
Memories flickered to life in my head, and I could literally smell the scent of one Demon who really got his hooks in me. He was the worst, in my opinion. He didn’t hurt me, he mentally mind fucked me and made it feel good every damn time.
A sliver of shame hit me at knowing he was the reason I’d learned that a finger up the ass could give me intense orgasms. I tried to tell myself I did it because it proved he’d had no power over me, but the reality was it just fucking felt good.
I jerked back as someone touched me, my head smacking against the window.
“Hey,” Ander said carefully, his hand on my arm. “Where’d you go? You just zoned out hard.”
Sweat was forming across my skin as I realized I was breathing too fast, and I focused on calming myself back down.
I never had flashbacks.
When I didn’t reply, he unbuckled both our seat belts and silently got out of the car, walking around the front to open my door.
“C’mon, swap. I’m fine to drive now.”
“I—”
“You’re not.”
I didn’t bother explaining it to him, he knew everything from my past, and I hadn’t shied away from the details.
He’d actually discovered one of the Demon’s who’d hurt me had escaped with his life and hunted the fucker down on my behalf last year when I’d told him.
I climbed out, the fresh air cooling my skin.
“That was weird,” I mumbled, scrubbing a hand over my face.
“Trauma doesn’t go away, man. We just learn to bury it,” he replied, tilting his head. “I still get nightmares of Mom and Kimberly sometimes.”
“I never get flashbacks,” I said with a frown, glancing at my hands as they shook slightly. “I literally smelt him and felt his touch.”
He knew which him I was referring to.
“The best cure for that is letting someone else put their hands all over you,” he half-joked. “I love you, but not that much. Let’s get home so you can snuggle with Raven or something.”
I nodded, still glaring at my shaky hands as I walked around to the passenger seat and climbed in, the rest of the drive home being silent.
Logan
I was happily enjoying my snuggles with Raven on the couch when Hurricane Zavier appeared and stole her from my lap. I went to stand and demand he gave her back, but Ander shot me a serious look and shook his head.
Studying Zavier for a second, I realized he didn’t look right. His hands shook a fraction and he seemed pale, making me frown.
Raven had noticed too, but she didn’t draw attention to it as she took his hand in hers while cupping his cheek with the other, murmuring to him about missing him all day.
“What happened?” I asked under my breath, and Ander sighed.
“Flashbacks.”
“Of what?” The second it left my mouth, I knew. “Oh. He never gets those.”
“I know. I said something in the car that triggered it,” he answered quietly, eyeing our friend who was already looking better just from Raven’s touch.
His shoulders relaxed, his eyes brightened a fraction, and his voice calmed.
I knew what that was like, she chased the darkness away for me too whenever it got too close.
Reid joined us from where he’d been cleaning up in the kitchen, his eyebrow raising as Zavier tugged at Raven’s shirt.
They were still talking, so I had no idea if he was even aware he was doing it.
Raven let out a squeak of surprise as Zavier suddenly kissed the hell out of her, Reid turning to us with amusement. “What did I miss?”
The amusement fell from his face as I answered. “Flashbacks.”
“How?”
“Lavaro said something and it set him off,” I stated, glancing at Ander. “What did you say?”
Zavier had started dragging Raven toward the bedroom, but his kisses had softened and he was in control. She was breaking through his demons with ease, just like she did for all of us.
Ander explained the car ride home, what he could remember of it anyway. He didn’t seem okay either, the sleep deprivation obvious.
“I think we all need some sleep,” Reid yawned, his eyes sliding to the bedroom as Raven groaned. “Should we consider stopping that?”
“Nope. After the day I’ve had, I need some Bluebird on my cock too,” Ander said as he kicked off his shoes, leaving them in the middle of the floor as he headed to the bedroom.
“Should we leave them alone for a while?” Reid asked slowly, and I snorted as I tugged my shirt over my head and started following them.
“Absolutely not. C’mon, bro. Come rub balls with me. It’s healing.”
Now it was his turn to snort, but his footsteps sounded behind me as I entered the bedroom.
I halted in the doorway, Reid running into my back as I took in the goddess on the bed. Raven was completely naked, her blue hair fanned out on the pillows and her head thrown back as her hips lifted off the bed. My eyes shifted to Zavier, who was working hard at getting her off with his mouth and fingers already.
Then, my eyes caught on her forearm the same time Reid’s must have.
“Is that a tattoo?” he asked quietly.
“Looks like it.”
Her arm reached out to grab onto the blankets, giving us a better view of it and making me look over her face again for a sign that she’d been hurting earlier that I’d missed.
Had she gotten Josh’s name randomly, or had she planned it?
She hadn’t wanted to visit the remains of our house, and part of me wondered if we’d missed just how much it was affecting her.
Why hadn’t she mentioned wanting a tattoo?
“She’s okay,” Reid murmured, doing his own assessment. “We’ll make sure of it.”
A desperate whine left Raven that had me kicking my pants and boxers off, her hips lifting off the bed more as her body tried to fight the pleasure.
She was fucking stunning, and if she had demons to drown, I’d be more than happy to help her.
Her fingers grabbed Zavier’s hair tightly as she cried out, her thighs slamming shut around his head as she bucked, but he only worked her harder until she was begging him to stop.
I was glad she read him so easily as she managed to grab his arm to pull him up her body for a kiss, a shudder rolling through him as she anchored him by running her hands up and down his back.
I hadn’t really seen Zavier freak out from flashbacks, so I’d been a little hesitant that he could blackout and hurt her. Seeing this though? She was keeping him in the present just fine.
Ander stripped off and crawled across the bed to her, my dick jerking as his hand circled her throat to kiss her and she moaned, grinding up against Zavier.
I was so hard, and she hadn’t even looked at me, let alone touched me.
Zavier wasted no time sliding inside her, and Raven didn’t let him be in charge for long as she flipped them over the second Ander let go of her throat. Her hips rolled and his eyes fluttered closed, savoring the feel of her as Ander’s lips explored her neck and shoulder.
I almost considered leaving them alone like Reid had suggested, but then she was reaching a hand in our direction, and I gravitated towards her like she was a beacon.
A groan left me as she grabbed my throat and jerked me closer for a kiss, my hand dropping to her clit to tease her.
She was so wet, ready to take all of us, and I was sure my dick was going to snap off with how hard it got at that mental image.
“You want Logan to stretch that tight ass and fill it with cum, Bluebird?” Ander murmured in her ear, making her shiver as she nodded. “Good girl. Put on a show for me and Reid. We want to see you working for Logan and Zavier’s cum like you’ll die without it.”
“You’re going to make me bust, bro. Stop it,” I joked as Raven released her hold on me, blindly reaching for the lube that Ander had tossed beside me.
“You’d better not. That’s Raven’s prize,” he grinned, swatting Raven’s ass so hard she almost fell forward. From the way Zavier cursed, she must have tensed up so damn good.
Reid all but shoved me aside as he attacked Raven’s mouth with his, and I quickly lubed up my cock and fingers before moving behind her.
I loved how she pressed back against me as I pushed a finger inside her ass, Reid swallowing her little gasps as I tried to take my time. I didn’t want to hurt her, but I needed to be inside her right now before I made a fool out of myself and came without contact.
With her slowly rocking on Zavier, and Reid and Ander distracting her mouth and hands, I added a second finger. The little sex fiend pushed back more, silently begging me to fill her, and I had to remind myself to be fucking gentle.
I’d love nothing more than to slam inside her, but even with a good warm up, she was still new to all of this.
None of us were small either, so the risk of hurting her was higher if I wasn’t careful.
She mumbled something, and Reid let out a chuckle against her mouth as he obviously heard what she said.
“Stop playing with her and fuck her, dude,” he said with amusement as Ander stole her mouth from her other side, interpreting her mumbles for me. “She can take it.”
“You want my cock, Rae?” I asked, removing my fingers and grasping my dick, teasing her ass with the head as she nodded.
“Where are your manners? Say please,” Ander growled, and she yelped at something he did.
“Fuck, Lavaro. Stop making her clench like that,” Zavier groaned, the sound almost pained.
“Like this?” Ander asked, doing whatever he’d done again and making her jerk.
“Asshole,” Zavier gritted out through clenched teeth, fighting the urge to come.
She’d stopped rocking at this point, but I knew how good it felt when her pussy gripped me.
My free hand moved to her waist, giving her a gentle squeeze. “What do you say, baby?”
“Logan, please,” she whimpered, wriggling her ass a little to tempt me. “Please fuck me.”
“I love it when you talk dirty to me,” I answered as I pushed inside a little, her body trying to reject me. “Come on, dirty girl. You wanted me to fill this ass with cum, so let me in. Good, breathe for me.”
Her breath hitched and I could tell she was holding it with anticipation, my cock sinking inside her more.
Then Ander spanked her ass and she almost snapped my damn dick off with how tight she tensed.
“He said breathe, baby,” Ander warned, his palm soothing the sting as he gently rubbed it. I gave him a dirty look that he pretended he couldn’t feel burning into the side of his head, and I sank in more while she was distracted.
“Fuck,” she panted, rolling her hips a little to try and make me move faster.
“Reid, make her come for us,” I murmured, placing kisses across her shoulder once I was all the way in, giving her a moment to adjust.
If I moved now, I was going to lose control and fuck her into oblivion.
She clenched as he started working her clit, promising her filthy things that I tried to block out to avoid coming myself, and when she started mumbling a bunch of curses, Ander got to his feet and silenced her with his cock down her throat.
She gagged, her body tensing as she fought for air, and then she was screaming around him as her ass clamped around me as she came.
A panicked shriek left her as Zavier and I picked up the pace, Reid’s hand moving faster on her clit.
“Look at the mess you’re making,” Reid growled, her body shaking from the intensity of her climax as Ander gave her a second to breathe. I slowed my thrusts, sliding a hand between us to feel how wet her thighs were.
“Did you squirt all over Zav, baby?” I asked, my arm banding around her middle to keep her close. Her head dropped back on my shoulder and her body jolted when Reid went back to toying with her clit.
“Ride me,” Zavier encouraged, his hands going to her waist to pull her forward and back like he wanted, and I knew he was close from how tense his thighs were against mine.
It didn’t take long to get her off again, both Zavier and I finishing with her, and I was careful as I pulled out since I’d been a little rough.
I dropped down on the lower half of the bed, letting Reid and Ander look after her for a second as I cooled down. Zavier was spent, rolling out of the way with his eyes closed. I didn’t want him losing himself in his head again, so I shuffled up the bed more and patted his shoulder, causing him to open his eyes and look at me.
“You still with us?”
“Yeah, man,” he mumbled, his brow creasing. “Sorry, I just?—”
“Trust me. I get it,” I promised, taking his hand and giving it a squeeze.
When I went to pull away, he held on tighter, telling me he wasn’t completely okay yet. I didn’t exactly want to snuggle him naked, it was pushing the friendship a little, so I got comfortable on my side and kept hold of his hand.
He’d suffered so much alone, at least I’d had Raven, Josh, and Reid to run to.
I never wanted him to feel alone with his pain again.
He relaxed at my acceptance, closing his eyes again.
At least I had a good view of Raven from here while I silently comforted him.
Reid
Worry tugged at my chest as I was vaguely aware of Zavier withdrawing, but Logan moved closer to offer him comfort, giving me the ability to focus on Raven instead.
I encouraged her to lie on her back as she winced and stretched her leg, and I shuffled down the bed further to grab her calf in my hands.
“Cramping?” I asked, digging my fingers into the muscle as it spasmed. I’d half expected Ander to push ahead and rail her, but despite looking ready to, he laid beside her and trailed soft kisses across her throat and jaw.
She practically melted into the bed, and I pulled her leg to the side a little more so I could get a good view of her pussy. Cum coated it, leaking out of her and onto the bed below, and I fought the urge to reach out and push it back in with my finger.
Logic told me we weren’t ready for kids, but my dick liked the idea of keeping her stuffed with cum.
The thought almost jolted me. I was the responsible one, I couldn’t keep letting myself think of things like that.
I glanced up as she spread her legs wider, her eyes on me. “You going to pump me full of cum, baby?”
Being called baby shouldn’t have been a turn on, but from Raven’s mouth? She was lucky I didn’t flip her over and slam straight inside.
“You want me to fill you up too?” I asked in a low voice, releasing her calf and crawling up her body, taking her chin in my hand. “You think you can handle more?”
“Take what you want from me,” she replied as she held my gaze, and I was a goner.
“Give the girl what she wants, Barron,” Ander snickered, stroking himself as he watched her. “I’ll hold her down if she starts jumping around too much.”
Raven’s eyes flared with heat, and I didn’t give a fuck that Ander’s dick had been in her mouth as I leaned down to claim her, giving her no warning before pushing inside her cum-soaked pussy.
She gasped, one of her hands coming to the back of my head to keep me there. The thought of pushing Zavier’s cum deeper inside her was driving me wild, my common sense slipping away like it always did around her.
“Harder,” she begged as I leaned back a little, lifting both her legs over my shoulders and practically bending her in half before planting my hands on either side of her on the bed.
“Harder?” I asked, double checking I’d heard her right, and the second she nodded, I started slamming into her like a mad man.
Ander was calling her filthy names that made me want to punch him a little, but the way her pupils grew and her curses increased, I held off on my urges.
She was into it, writhing below me as I railed her, and I didn’t dare slow down as she started coming. My leg was already aching, but I wanted to make her squirt so badly that I didn’t give a fuck.
From the sounds coming from her mouth and her pussy, I was pretty sure I’d achieved my goal, especially when she started bucking wildly as she tried to get me to stop from the overstimulation.
“Scoot back a little, or you’ll be getting my ass in your face,” Ander warned, giving me no choice but to slow so he could straddle her chest. He fed her his cock, and I took the time to discreetly stretch my leg out a little while she couldn’t see me.
I winced as the discomfort turned to warm pain.
Yeah, I’d definitely overdone it again.
I looked over to find Logan assessing me, a knowing look in his eyes as he raised an eyebrow in question. He knew I was overdoing it too.
It felt worse than it had been for a while, being on my feet at the community center all week taking its toll.
My gaze jerked away from Logan as Raven let out a loud gag, her hands clawing at Ander’s back as he fucked her mouth.
Her pussy kept tightening around me with every gag, and the familiar tingle in my spine started as I rocked into her. With the ache starting to subside in my leg a little, I figured I’d better hurry it up and finish so I could ice it, and she moaned as I started rubbing her clit lightly with every thrust.
“You’re going to make him come, Bluebird. Your greedy pussy is going to milk him fucking dry,” Ander murmured, cupping her cheek as he kept rocking into her mouth. “Then, you’re going to be a good girl and bend over for me so I can come in you too.”
I was pretty sure she mumbled a please around him, the sound going straight to my damn dick as my climax appeared out of nowhere.
I cursed as I buried deep inside her, my fingers gripping the blanket to stop myself from bruising her instead.
I’d barely finished before Ander was off her and rolling her over to her knees, not giving a fuck about my cum dripping out of her as he slammed into her pussy from behind.
Her scream was raw, and it took her all of two seconds of his piercings rubbing on her G-spot before she was exploding loudly, burying her face in the pillows to try and muffle it.
He fisted her hair and yanked her back roughly, his voice sharp. “When you scream for me, don’t fucking hide it.”
She was cursing, sobbing, and begging all at once, and he didn’t slow down until he came, finally giving her a break as his thrusts turned gentle and shallow. He leaned down to kiss her shoulder, and I silently got to my feet to pull my boxers on and headed to the bathroom to find her a damp cloth.
I almost ran into Logan as I grabbed the cloth and turned to wet it in the sink, finding that he’d followed me.
“You need to get it looked at, bro. It’s getting worse.”
“It’s not worse, I’m just on my feet more now I’m working,” I grunted, giving him a dirty look as he took the cloth from me. “Dude?—”
“I’ve got her. Go ice it,” he ordered, making me grit my teeth.
“Don’t tell me what to do, asshole.”
“Payback’s a bitch,” he chuckled, shooing me. “Seriously, you’ll stress Rae out if she knows you’re not looking after it. And I mean it, get it looked at. We have the money coming in now.”
I wanted to argue, but I couldn’t. We could afford to spend a little on ourselves, and Raven would feel better if I got it looked at.
I sighed, hobbling from the room and towards the kitchen, pulling an ice pack out of the freezer. Once settled on the couch, I put the ice on it and blew out a breath, wondering if I could get back in to see the physiotherapist.
The one I was seeing was insanely expensive, but surely there was a cheaper one somewhere.
“They’re asleep,” Logan yawned as he wandered out in his boxers a few minutes later. “They must have been tired.”
“Lopez okay?”
He dropped down on the other end of the couch with a grimace. “Honestly? I don’t know. He fell asleep not long after you and Ander started playing with Raven, but I haven’t really seen him triggered like this before. I have no idea if he’ll have nightmares or not.”
“As long as he gets some sleep. All three of them are exhausted,” I replied, wincing as I sat up a little more. “I’m getting really worried about Lavaro.”
“What happens if we don’t find Blake or Dante?” Logan asked quietly, already knowing the answer.
If Ander didn’t find them, he was likely to start tearing people limb from limb until he did.