Chapter 4
CHAPTER
FOUR
ATOMIC
The music is loud, it’s fucking blasting, and I smile at the sight of my club enjoying themselves, my men. Money is flowing, bitches are plentiful, and the drinks are ready for consumption. This is the life my father wanted for this club.
Sure, the club did okay financially when we were kids, even when I took over, but it never did this well, and I fucking love it.
My men love it, too.
King walks up to me, though he’s swaying already, and I have to laugh. A year ago, he would have probably still been pretty fucking sober. Now, he doesn’t drink like he used to. He spends his evenings with his woman instead of here with booze and whores.
“You look completely fucked up,” I state as he stands a few feet away from me, his body swaying from side to side. I’m sure he thinks he’s standing still, but he assuredly is not.
His lips curve up into a grin, but it’s Shawn at his side who speaks. “He’s trashed,” she announces.
“I’m celebrating,” King states.
“Celebrating?”
He leans forward, his eyes wide as he tries to focus on me. I almost ask him how many of me there are, but I decide against it. He’s so fucked. He’s not going to remember any of this by tomorrow afternoon when he finally wakes up from being passed out.
“It’s a boy,” Shawn cries.
Fuck, I feel like King just announced her pregnancy. Now she already knows what the fuck it is. My eyes widen, and I shift my attention from Shawn to King, then I smirk.
“No shit?”
King leans forward, placing his hand on the center of my chest. “No fuckin’ shit. A boy. Fucking unbelievable.”
Smiling, I wrap my fingers around the back of his neck and pull him forward slightly until our foreheads touch.
“It’s wonderful, brother. I’m happy as fuck for you.”
“A boy,” he rasps. “Fuck.”
Chuckling, I release my grasp on him and shift my attention down to Shawn, who is watching us with big eyes and a wide smile. “Happy as fuck for you, too, babe.”
She nods her head, then throws her arms around me. I can feel said baby bump against my stomach, and I don’t know why, but it makes me feel some kind of way. I’m not sure how, so I brush it off, pushing it back down to the pit of my stomach as she releases me.
“I’m sorry. I’m just excited and nervous at the same time,” she says as she wipes the wetness from her eyes.
“It’s all good,” I murmur.
They leave a few moments later and make their rounds to tell everyone the news. It’s great fuckin’ news, too. I am happy for them. We haven’t had any babies around the clubhouse since we were babies ourselves.
“You okay over here all by yourself?” Vixen purrs.
Reaching out for her, I wrap my arm around her waist and pull her against my chest. “I’m better now that you’re here. Let’s get fucking wasted,” I murmur.
And that’s what the fuck I do.
I get wasted with Vixen, and then we fuck. It’s sexy as fuck. It’s hot and dirty. It’s sweaty and real. I’ve been with her dozens of times. I like her because she’s low drama and a great time, open to anything and everything.
Except when we’re finished, I feel guilt climb up my throat and threaten to choke me. Rolling onto my side, I reach for my sleeping aids and take a few with half a highball of whiskey next to me.
Vixen is passed the fuck out, her bare tits on display, her arm slung over her eyes, and her legs open, showing me every fucking inch of her body. Even though I came less than an hour ago, the sight should make my cock twitch, but it doesn’t.
I can’t stop feeling disgusted with myself and sick to my stomach.
Everything in my life is going perfectly, it’s goddamn fantastic, and yet I hate myself.
I’ve let Ryan walk away again. I didn’t even try to stop her.
I told her that I wanted her to do something that I knew she wouldn’t, just to be a dick.
The sleeping pills start to take over, and my eyelids flutter closed. I hear a faint buzzing in the background, but I have no clue what it is, and even if I want to try and find it, my eyes are closing without my control, and I slip into sleep.
RYAN
There is a loud moaning sound in the background. I don’t know what it is, but it’s annoying as hell. As I try to open my eyes, the sound grows louder, and I realize it’s me who’s making the offending noise. My eyes don’t open, no matter how hard I try.
Letting out a breath, I listen intently for noises around me. I hear beeping, and when I relax my body, I can feel something cold sliding through my veins. I’m lying down, but past that, I don’t know much.
I must be in a hospital. I don’t know why I’m here, so instead of trying to open my eyes, I keep them closed as I replay the events that I do remember from last night in my head. I tucked Adam into bed, then I decided I was going to call Atomic and beg.
My breathing starts to come out in heavy pants as I remember my front door being kicked open and Golden Joker standing right there in front of me. I hear a woman’s voice in the background, but it sounds like an echo that is far away.
There is some commotion in the distance, but I can’t hear any details over the heavy panting coming from my mouth and the roaring in my ears. Then, as if a flip has been switched, I feel like I’m floating.
A few moments later, I finally hear someone’s voice.
I don’t recognize it at all, but it’s soothing.
“There, there. It’s all going to be okay, hon.
Just breathe and get some sleep.” There is a moment of silence before that same voice speaks again.
“She’s going to be okay. She’s just scared because she can’t open her eyes. It’s unsettling not to be able to see.”
Then there is nothingness because I drift off into sleep. Aided sleep, but sleep.
I’m not sure how long I’m out, but when my body jumps, I’m able to crack my eyes open. It’s bright in the room, so I close them again, and before I can call out to whoever could possibly be in the room, I hear a deep voice.
A roaring, deep voice.
“What the actual fuck is going on?” It roars. My heart starts racing again, and I’m given whatever it was that I had earlier.
Everything goes dark.
ATOMIC
Pushing myself up to a seated position, I try not to puke. I drank way too fucking much last night… this morning… whenever it was that I actually stopped.
My phone dances on the nightstand. I reach for it, but it takes me a moment for my eyes to adjust to the numbers on the screen. When I can focus, I don’t recognize the numbers at all. As my eyes make out the letters above the numbers, I frown as I read the word HOSPITAL at the end of said name.
The fuck?
I slide my thumb across the screen, my heart racing as I bring the phone to my ear.
“Hello?” My greeting is cautious. I’m not sure what the fuck is going on. Who could be at the hospital, any hospital?
“Hello, I’m looking for a Mr. Atomic?”
The voice on the other end of the line sounds like maybe it’s a lady in her seventies. Her words come out a bit shaky, but she also sounds kind. I get a grandmotherly vibe from her, although not my grandmother because she wasn’t like the ones you see in movies. She was hard and harsh.
“You got him,” I grunt, shaking away thoughts of my grandmother.
There is a moment of hesitation before I hear her let out a trembling breath, a sigh really, and I don’t feel any fucking better than I did when I slid my thumb across the phone after reading the word hospital flash across the screen.
In fact, my anxiety is through the goddamn roof right now, wondering what the fuck is going on.
“I’m here in Harmony Springs Hospital, and there’s been an accident.”
I rack my brain, trying to figure out who the fuck I know who lives in a place called Harmony Springs. I’ve never even heard of it before, and I wonder if it’s even in Texas and if this is some kind of spam scamming call.
Then I wonder if one of the guys went on a run and got in an accident somewhere.
There wasn’t supposed to be a load going anywhere last night, but fuck if I know what they do sometimes.
Maybe it’s just one of the guys. If that’s the case, I would be the person to call since I’m president of the club.
“What’s happened?” I demand when she hasn’t said anything else.
Again, there is a moment of silence before she speaks. “It’s Ryan Turner,” she says, her voice barely above a whisper. “You were on her list to call as an emergency contact.”
I’m silent this time.
She doesn’t know why I’m quiet, so she continues to speak. “She’s been admitted and is still unconscious.”
“I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
Ending the call, I start to head toward the closet to put some clothes on, but then decide I should probably shower, so I turn and head toward the bathroom. I’ve forgotten about the whore lying naked in the bed. I don’t give a fuck about her anyway. Ryan is in the hospital,
Unconscious.
What the actual fuck has happened?
I take the quickest shower in the history of showers and use the towel to dry off as much as I can as fast as I can. My hair and beard are still dripping wet when I walk out of the bathroom and into my bedroom.
Vixen is no longer naked and spread across my bed. She’s already dismissed herself, and I can’t help but wonder how much of that phone conversation she heard. I don’t know that it matters. She wasn’t around when Ryan was here.
She doesn’t know what that bitch did. Doesn’t know that she betrayed me.
But she also doesn’t know just how much I fucking wanted her.
And how much I fucking fell apart when she walked away.
Although, I can’t say that I was innocent of any of that.
I wasn’t. I fucked up, too, just not as badly as her.
Packing a small bag, I get dressed and head down to the bar area. There are a few people walking around, and I jerk my chin toward Gnaw. He does the same back to me, then frowns and moves in my direction.
When he’s standing in front of me, he opens his mouth, no doubt to ask me if I’m okay, but I don’t let him. I’m in too much of a hurry.
“Ryan is in the hospital. I’m her emergency contact, which I don’t fucking understand, but I’m leaving right now to find out what happened.”
Gnaw’s smile turns into a frown. “Want me to go with you?” he asks.
“No. I need to do this on my own. Let King know where I am if he asks. I’ll call when I get to wherever I’m going.”
Without another word, I walk past him and straight for my bike. After loading my small, packed bag of clothes into the saddlebag, I put Harmony Springs Hospital into the GPS, and I’m a bit taken aback by the location.
Arkansas.
She’s in a whole ass other state. Although it’ll only take about two and a half hours to get there, I plan on making it in less than two. Climbing on my bike, I start the engine and get the fuck out of there.