Chapter 24 Willow #2
“We’ve never claimed to be good people, Solnyshka,” Malice grunts, and it comes out sounding almost mocking. “You know we’ve killed people before. You saw what we did to Nikolai. Hell, you watched Victor kill your boss in your own fucking apartment. So why does it matter if we did it again?”
I have to swallow back the metallic taste of bile, thinking of when Victor killed Carl right there in my living room. I haven’t thought about that in a while, and dragging up those memories now doesn’t help anything.
“Stop it,” I snap. “Stop… twisting around the fucking question and just answer me. I want to know. Ransom told me no one was going to get hurt, and I believed him. I only did it because I didn’t think I was helping someone fucking die! So tell me the goddamned truth for once!”
My voice rings out in the entryway, and Malice’s eyebrows twitch, as if he’s surprised by the intensity of my reaction.
He looks away, his jaw still tight, his hands curled into fists. We’re just inches apart, and I can tell that he’s breathing harder. Part of me worries that his wound is hurting him, but I don’t let up.
“I’m not leaving until you tell me,” I say, folding my arms tightly, trying to make myself look as immovable as possible. “What was the job?”
“Jesus fucking Christ. Fine,” he mutters.
When he looks back up at me, his eyes are shadowed, like he’s trying to keep a handle on his feelings, to keep me from seeing them.
“It wasn’t supposed to go down like that, okay?
We put a device on Galvin, like X told us to.
It was just supposed to be a recording device, and we were supposed to follow him, to make sure the receiver stayed in range. That’s all we were fucking told.”
“Then what happened?” I ask. “How did he end up dead?”
“Well, it turns out the goddamned device was also some kind of explosive. It went off in his car, and he crashed. We were tailing him so close that when he flipped over, we slammed right into his car.”
My eyes flicker down to his side, where I know the wound is hidden beneath his shirt.
“That’s how you got hurt,” I murmur.
Malice nods. “Yeah. It seems like X fucking set us up. He didn’t give us the full info about the device or what it would do on purpose. Maybe because he wanted to get us killed along with Galvin.”
I stare at him as he finishes talking, reeling in shock.
I know that this mysterious man X has some control over the brothers, because he’s the one who got Malice out of prison and can send him back if they don’t do what he says, but this is…
Why would he also want them dead?
For a dizzying moment, fear rises up in me, mingling with the anger that’s slowly draining out and making me feel sick.
It’s fear for Malice and his brothers, sharp and intense.
Because this is a lot. Someone wants them dead, and as I grapple with that realization, I feel like I’m in over my head in a way I haven’t been since I first came to live with them all those weeks ago.
X is clearly a powerful man, with connections and resources. He holds power over the brothers, and he wants them dead, which means they’re in danger in a big way.
And they didn’t tell me.
Because of course they didn’t.
They never tell me anything until it’s too late.
They never clue me in on what’s going on. All they do is show up when they need my help or make decisions behind my back, cutting me out and leaving me in the dark.
The terrifying truth is, I’m getting attached to these men. They’re under my skin, just like Malice said, and I’m so terrified that I’ll fall for them completely, only to see them die. I’m terrified that they’re the wrong people to fall for.
They live dangerous lives. They’ve never made any secret of that, and there’s nothing I can do to keep them safe. Nothing I can do to stop them from getting hurt by enemies that I probably won’t even know about because they won’t fucking tell me.
Malice is still watching me, and for a moment, his shuttered expression drops away. His dark gray eyes narrow a little, as if he’s trying to work out what I’m thinking now that I know the truth. But then he closes down again, and his features harden as he throws his walls back up.
The harsh anger I’ve seen in him before bleeds back into his gaze, and he looks away again.
“Don’t act so fucking surprised. You’ve known from the beginning what kind of men we are,” he mutters angrily. “If you can’t handle that, fine. But we never lied to you about who we are. Unlike you, who’s been lying to yourself about who you are since the day I fucking met you.”
It’s like a slap in the face to hear that, and I take a step back, stung. I have enough trouble with the constant war going on in my head, caught between what I want and what I feel like I should want.
I remember Ransom telling me that I’m a bad girl, trying too hard to pretend to be good, and it feels more like a condemnation than a teasing comment now.
I swallow hard, my own hands curling into fists.
“You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about,” I say coldly. “But I’m done being lied to. Next time, just leave me out of this. If you can’t even be honest with me, then don’t come asking me for any more favors.”
With that, I turn on my heel, storming out before Malice can say anything else.
My emotions are a churning mess, and I practically throw myself into my car and drive home as fast as I can.
As if that will somehow help me leave it all behind.