Chapter 6
SIX
LUKAS
“Come on, Lukas. Please,” Asher whined as he followed me downstairs.
Asher, or Ash, as everyone called him, was the younger brother of a former adult film star.
He’d hero-worshipped his older brother, Leo, and when he’d found out about Leo’s career in the adult industry, he’d sought me out.
He’d been freshly eighteen at the time and heartbroken by his brother’s death.
That was two years ago now, and I thought if I stalled long enough, if I made him enough deals, gave him enough distractions, that he’d eventually change his mind about wanting to film adult content.
Was there anything wrong with adult content? Of course not. But Ash had been barely eighteen and mourning his brother. Leo had simply gone to bed one night and never woke up. He’d had a massive aneurysm in his sleep, never even known what hit him.
And for the two years since, Ash had been on my ass to put him to work.
I’d refused at first, then he said he’d find a different studio, any studio, and I’d caved.
But I told him he had to wait until I thought he was ready.
I’d hoped that if I put him off long enough, he’d lose interest. Instead it had only made him more determined, and it kept him around a lot more. He was practically a brother to me now.
“You promised, Lukas.” Ash followed me down to the basement where we were going to set up to shoot later. “You said I could when I was ready, and I am ready. I’ve been ready.”
When I didn’t say anything, he flopped down on the bed. The worst part of it all was that Ash had potential. He was a good-looking guy, and he already had a decent online presence on his OnlyFans account.
“Lukas, you’re not being fair.” Ash shoved his dark hair out of his face and rolled onto his stomach. “Come on, Lukas. Look at this ass. Don’t let it go to waste.”
Looking over at him, I couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled out of me. He must have seen it for the weakness that it was because he went in for the kill. Ruthless little shit.
“I’ll walk, Lukas. I’ll find the seediest, grossest, worst studio, and I’ll film with them. Don’t think I won’t. And I won’t read the contract before I sign. You wouldn’t want that for me, would you?” He batted his eyelashes. “Please, Lukey.”
I knew he was trying his best to look seductive, and it would probably have worked on someone who was capable of being seduced, or someone who didn’t look at Ash and see a kid brother, but I could also tell he was dead serious. It truly was now or never.
“Fine. It won’t be right away because of shit I already have scheduled, but I’ll find a good scene partner for you, and the three of us will sit down and have a meeting about it.”
Ash sprang up off the bed and flung himself at me. The weight of him hitting me made me stumble back a bit, but I recovered and wrapped my arms around him and gave him a squeeze.
“You understand why I made you wait so long, didn’t you?”
He laughed. “I get it. And, like, I probably wasn’t ready then. But I’ve had two years to sit on it, Lukas.” Ash pulled back and looked up at me. At five-foot-six, he was a pocket-sized version of Leo, who’d been just over six feet tall. “I’m ready now. I promise.”
Lifting my hand, I dropped it on the top of his head and ruffled his hair. “I know. And I want you to know that you can pull the plug at any time.”
Ash rolled his eyes and batted my hand away from his hair. Stepping out of reach, he fussed with it, combing the strands back into place with his fingers. “I know that. You were good to Leo. You’ll be good to me too.”
“How do you even know I was good to Leo?” I hadn’t met Ash until after Leo’s death. Leo and I had been fairly close, but he’d always kept his younger brother far away from anyone in the industry.
Ash rolled his eyes. “Oh, please. You’re good to everyone.
All the guys say the nicest shit about you when you’re not around.
Plus, you’ve had two years to mistreat me and exploit my grief, and you didn’t.
Like, it would have been super easy, and kind of shitty, and I’m lowkey glad you made me wait so long.
But, dude, if you don’t put me in a shoot soon, I will curse you. ”
“Save your curses. Like I said, it won’t happen right away, but soon. Let me talk to a few people.” I dug into the closet and pulled out a different set of bedding and tossed it at him. “Did you want to top or bottom?”
I knew the answer before I asked, but part of me hoped he’d want to top. I had a few big, burly guys who’d love to be on the receiving end, but Ash did his signature eye roll.
“Really? Do I look like a top to you?”
“Hey, no stereotypes. I’ve been topped by guys your size. Being short and cute doesn’t make you a bottom.”
“No, that’s true. But liking dick in my ass does. I want to bottom. We can even do one of those innocent virgin type shoots. Who should pop my cherry? Ooh, maybe like a step-brother? Those are still hot, right?”
My stomach did a funny twist at that thought. “We’ll see. I’m not ruling it out. But if you want to play the part of the innocent virgin, I won’t say no. It’s always popular.”
Ash made quick work of changing out the bedding for a different color scheme while I swapped out some of the background props.
Sometimes we rented hotel rooms or grabbed condos on Airbnb, but to keep costs down, we often shot in the basement, or sometimes one of the guys had a sweet setup and we’d shoot there.
But the next few were scheduled to be shot here.
“You know,” Ash paused and looked at me from the corner of his eye. “You could always come out of retirement and do the shoot with me.”
His statement came out of nowhere, surprising me to the point that I almost dropped the pictures I’d been swapping out.
I worried for a moment that Ash might be harboring some sort of massive crush on me, but when I turned and looked at him, he just grinned, looking as casual and carefree as he always did.
“You should have seen your face, Lukey.” He laughed. “Dude, relax.”
“Why are you like this? I’m too old for you to scare me like that.”
Ash let out an amused snort. “You’re what, thirty-four?”
“I was thirty-four when we met two years ago. I’m thirty-six now. Aka too old for you.”
“Maybe I have daddy issues.” He frowned. “Actually, I know I have daddy issues.”
He stuffed the pillows into fresh pillowcases and fluffed them up a few times. He cast a glance at me, his expression a little more serious now. “Who did you have in mind for me? Or can I, like, request someone?”
“Tell you what. I’ll make a list of people I think would be a good match.
And you can make a list of people you’d like to scene with, and then we can compare notes and see if there are any matches.
I can’t guarantee anyone we settle on will say yes, but it will give us a starting point.
” And it would give me time to think it over a bit more.
I’d always hoped that maybe Ash would find something else he was interested in doing.
I knew Leo didn’t want this for him. Leo had talked about his little brother and the fact that Asher worshipped the ground he walked on.
According to him, Ash had found out about Leo’s career some months before he died.
Leo had been mortified, and it had only been made worse by the fact that Asher had thought it was a great idea.
Leo had never loved what we did. He’d done it for the paycheck. He’d done it to put together a college fund for Asher, whom he’d bragged about all the time. Asher had been some sort of teenage science wiz, and Leo had hoped that Ash would put his big, beautiful brain to work.
Ash and Leo had been born to parents who were fucked up when they had their first kid but had sorted their shit out by the time Ash came along as a surprise ten years later.
By then, Leo had already cemented his place in the family as the problem child, but he’d adored Ash and had done his best to make sure Ash had all the opportunities he never would.
Because, of course, their parents didn’t stay on the straight and narrow and Asher spent the final years of high school living with Leo fulltime.
And then he’d died. I’d offered to let Ash stay with me, but he wouldn’t leave the apartment they’d shared. Even though he’d been the one to find Leo.
“You promise you’re not going to back out on me?” Ash asked. He tucked his hands in his pockets and rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet. When he did that, he looked even younger than his twenty years.
“I won’t back out on you. A promise is a promise.”
“Yeah, but you’ve been stalling for like two years.”
“For good reason.” I hung the picture on the wall, an abstract print to replace the landscape I was taking down.
“Leo didn’t want you anywhere near this life, and I wasn’t about to shove a vulnerable eighteen-year-old in front of the camera mere months after his brother died. Sorry if that makes me an asshole.”
“See,” Ash whined. “This is why I knew I had to work with you. It can’t be anyone else.
No matter how much I threaten. I know Leo didn’t want this for me, but he also never wanted anything for himself.
Everything he did was for me so I could have the life I wanted.
And I want this.” Ash tipped his chin up and rolled his shoulders back, giving him an extra half inch of height.
“I’ll have a list for you next week, okay? We’ll have a sit down after the shoot with Jax. Put it on my schedule.”
Ash’s face lit up, and he nearly fumbled his phone as he pulled it from his pocket. To keep Asher around so I could keep an eye on him, I’d hired him as my personal assistant after Leo’s death. He now took care of all my scheduling arrangements.
“Don’t forget you’re meeting with that writer tomorrow,” Ash informed me as he tucked his phone away. “How’s that going, anyway?”
Asher had also offered to write my memoir with me, but I’d declined his offer. It wasn’t that I didn’t think he could do it, but I didn’t feel comfortable discussing my past with him. In a lot of ways, it had been easier to talk to Sawyer about my life. Even if we’d barely started.
“I get to look at the intro tomorrow, and then we’re talking about the first chapter. So things are moving along nicely.”
“What’s he like?” Ash plopped down on the freshly-made bed and watched me fiddle with the background props some more.
“Quiet. Reserved. He’s nice, though. Easy to talk to. And Lara likes him.”
“Lara likes everyone.”
It was true, but it was still a selling point that Sawyer liked her and hadn’t complained about the massive amount of dog hair left on his clothes by the time we were finished. I absolutely used my dog as a character test for people, and Sawyer had passed with flying colors.