Chapter 20 #2
“I’m on yours. I’ve always been on yours. I’ll always be on yours.” He shifted to better see me. “But I wonder if your loyalties have shifted. You seemed awfully close to your sister’s fiancé.”
I scowled. “He’s not her fiancé.”
“He was a few days ago. Almost walked her down the aisle.”
“Until her secret boyfriend announced their pregnancy,” I reminded him.
Brett’s mouth settled into a grim line. “I’m not sure about that one. He seems a bit...dull.”
“Well, dull or not, he’s the father of her baby so he’s family now.”
Brett grunted. “Maybe.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not sure threats will work on that one.”
“Money might.”
“Maybe,” I repeated uncertainly.
Our car turned into the main entrance of the airport. Instead of driving to the terminal, the driver made a series of turns and passed through four gates with a flash of paperwork. We arrived at a private air hangar, and the car slowed to a stop.
“We’re stopping in Paris to refuel and then on to Dallas,” Brett said before stepping out of the car. “Sit tight. I’ll help you get out.”
Not wanting to feel the pull on my stitches, I waited dutifully.
When he opened the door and extended his hands, I took hold and let him cautiously guide me into a standing position.
He supported my shoulders as I took small steps toward the hangar.
We entered the small makeshift waiting area and found most of my family sitting in the ochre leather chairs.
My mother didn’t bother getting up from her seat. Legs crossed, she sat stiffly, her navy wrap dress primly arranged about her knees. Every bit the ice queen, she looked ready to freeze every last one of us with a simple blink of her judgmental eyes.
“You’re walking.” She raked her gaze over me. “I guess they were overexaggerating that stab wound.”
Beside me, Brett exhaled in anger. Dafina winced, and Dusan seemed taken aback. Not in the mood for my mother’s cutting remarks, I patted the thick bottom half of my B-belly and airily replied, “I got saved by my FUPA.”
My mother sucked in a sharp and disgusted breath. Dafina tried to hold it together, but she lost it, laughing like a lunatic as our mother sputtered. “You’re so nasty, Elona. I can’t believe you came from my genes or your father’s.”
“Did I?” The question came out rudely, but I couldn’t help it. I couldn’t stop thinking about the possibility that my brother and sister weren’t fully my brother and sister. “Did all of us come from our father? Or just some of us?”
“What are you insinuating?” she asked coldly.
“You know what I’m asking,” I insisted, no longer willing to back down. “Is it true? The rumors? That you had an affair? That some of us aren’t actually Dushkus at all?” I glanced at my sister. “Is that what you meant when you said our dad didn’t find out?”
Dafina swallowed nervously. “I wasn’t accusing. I just—I heard the rumors when I was visiting Luka. I overheard Drita telling someone that we looked like Mom’s boyfriend. When I said it at the house that day, I was just being a jerk.”
Our mother shot to her feet, clutching her phone. “I don’t have to sit here and take this.”
“You’re right, Ana,” Brett interjected calmly. “I can have the girls tested when they get home. We’ll see if they have the same father. It won’t be difficult for me to get a hold of some of your father-in-law's DNA either.”
“Good luck with that.” My mother laughed. “I had him cremated.”
“Why?” Dafina stood and crossed her arms. “Why would you do that?”
“Why wouldn’t I? I’m not spending one penny more than necessary to get rid of him. He's lucky I didn't throw him under a bridge to rot! He didn’t have any friends who would have come to a funeral anyway.”
“That’s not the—.”
“Don’t stand there and defend that monster!
” our mother sharply interrupted. “He was a disgusting old man. He was evil. He abused your father. He beat your grandmother right up until the week that she died from cancer. He hated you kids. All three of you. Even Skender.” Her voice grew shriller and shriller with each word.
“Your grandfather was the one who started the rumor about paternity.”
She shook her head and practically panted as she tried to get control of herself.
“Yes, I did have an affair. After Skender was born. Enver died in the war, defending your father. That’s all I’m going to say about it.
” She stormed toward the door of the hangar.
“If you want to get paternity tests, go ahead. You’ve already made up your mind about me.
I’ll be with your brother in Athens when you’re ready to apologize. ”
We didn’t stop her from leaving. I felt a little bad about it but only a little.
“See?” Dafina turned toward Dusan who sat ramrod straight in the too small chair. “I told you my family is crazy.” She glanced back at me and held up her hands in a placating manner. “No offense.”
“None taken.” She wasn’t saying anything I hadn’t thought a million times.
"Poor Skender," my sister said sadly. "Recovering from all that surgery and not being able to escape our mother?" She shuddered dramatically. "I'd be begging for sedatives from the nurses."
Skender had been flown my medical helicopter to Athens as soon as Brett had arrived in Tirana.
He'd wanted our brother to have better care than was available in the capital.
The surgeon there, a famous plastic specialist, had given strict orders that Skender not fly by plane for at least three months. For now, he was stuck there with her.
"I've hired people to look after him," Brett assured us. "When he’s healthy enough to fly, I’ll bring him over to Dallas.”
“Dallas?” Dafina repeated with surprise. “Not Houston?”
“I asked him, and he was very clear that he wanted no part of Houston,” Brett said. “I’m going to put him up at the house or out at the ranch. We’ll figure out what he’s going to do about school once he’s recovered.”
“So you two are talking now?” Dafina asked with obvious surprise.
“I know I made a mistake not fighting harder for him.” His expression darkened. “The biggest regret of my life was not fighting your mother to get custody of all three of you when we divorced. I should have paid her whatever she wanted. Maybe I could have kept Skender in the US where he belonged.”
“No, you couldn’t,” Dusan finally spoke, his voice deep and steady. “As soon as the old man stopped paying the tithe, the clock was ticking. It wasn’t a problem outside money could fix. It was a promise made that had to be kept.”
Brett regarded Dusan for a moment. “Be that as it may, I should have tried.” He glanced at Dafina. “I should have done more for you.”
“You paid for my private school, for both of my degrees, my cars, my allowance,” she listed all the things our stepdad had provided.
“And it wasn’t nearly enough,” he argued. “I knew what your mother was. What she is,” he amended. “It was wrong of me to leave you alone with that.”
“Well,” Dafina squirmed uncomfortably, “your apology is accepted. We’re fine.”
Brett looked like he was anything but fine. He seemed truly saddened by his mistakes and deeply troubled by his regrets. “Okay, but I’m paying for the real wedding.”
Dafina smiled at Dusan. “See? I told you he wouldn’t be upset about the whole baby before the wedding thing.”
“I didn’t say that,” Brett grumbled. Flicking his fingers at Dusan, he said, “Son, why don’t you walk with me to the plane. We need to chat.”
Dusan hefted himself out of the chair, gave Dafina a nervous glance and then lumbered after Brett who was headed for the doorway to the tarmac.
“That went better than I expected.” Dafina looped her arm through mine. “You need some help?”
“A little if you don’t mind,” I admitted, feeling tired and a little unsteady.
“That was hilarious about the FUPA by the way.”
I snorted. “It was gross. I shouldn’t have said it.”
“She deserved it. We should make a habit of telling her off from now on,” Dafina decided.
“I doubt I’m going to cross paths with her much at all after this.”
“Because you’re moving to China?” she asked, holding the door open for me.
“Mostly,” I agreed, “but I’m also done answering her summons. I’m done with Houston, too.”
“I get it.” She didn’t need me to spell out all the reasons why I never wanted to go back there.
Feeling vulnerable, I confessed, “Kristo knew about what happened when I was fourteen. He brought it up on the boat, used it against me. He told Luka.”
“How did Luka react?”
“I don’t remember.” I could see the disbelief on her face.
“No, really. So much of what happened there is a blur. It’s bits and pieces.
It’s all fuzzy around the edges. I had a knife buried in my gut, and I was already exhausted and terrified.
I thought Skender was dying. I knew Luka was because he’d been shot twice. ”
“Well, it’s not as if you’ll ever have to see him again,” she reasoned helpfully. “Right?”
“Yeah,” I said, faking a smile even as my heart shattered. “That’s true. I’ll never see him again.”
I managed to hold it together as we slowly took the stairs up into the plane and got seated. I pretended to be tired and asked for a pillow and blanket that I used to cocoon myself in my seat, hiding away from my family.
My eyes burned, and my throat ached as emotion welled up inside me, threating to erupt. I let the tears come silently, refusing to sob, refusing to let anyone else know that I was dying inside.
I’ll never see him again.
That one night was all I would ever have of him. Like a fever dream of lust and need and desire, it would shimmer away, fade into nothing. It would be like it had never happened.
As much as it hurt, I had to acknowledge the ugly truth. Luka was never meant for me. He was never going to be mine. Our one night together hadn’t changed any of that.
He would heal and recover and eventually find love with someone who fit into his complicated life.
And me? I’d go to Shanghai, work hard, build something for myself and learn to be content in my role as aunt to Dafina’s baby. That’s all there was for me. That’s all there ever could be for me.
The sooner I learned to accept that, the better.