Chapter 31
Lana
Holland dragged me to a new bar downtown on Thursday night.
I didn’t argue, because she had been talking about the place for days, and I figured a night out would be good for both of us.
The bar was packed but not overwhelming.
The live music was nice, and the overall atmosphere made this place feel like one I’d come back to.
I danced with Holland and a few of our college friends and just let myself enjoy the night.
But the whole time, there was this strange pressure sitting in my chest. It wasn’t really that intense, but it was bothering me somehow.
I hadn’t done anything wrong, hadn’t forgotten to turn something in, and I hadn’t said anything that could start drama.
There was no reason for me to feel uneasy, yet I did.
Even after my second drink, that feeling stayed. It didn’t grow, but it didn’t fade either. I did my best to ignore it, especially when Holland grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the bar to get something to eat. Food usually made everything better.
We squeezed between two guys and leaned across the counter. Holland ordered cheeseburgers and fries for us, and the guy behind the bar handed the plates over a couple of minutes later.
“Here you go, ladies. One normal cheeseburger and one with vegan cheese,” he said. He gave us a broad grin. “You having fun?”
“Oh, totally,” Holland said. “This place is great. We’ll definitely be coming back.”
He looked pleased, and I offered him a small smile before picking up my burger. I took a bite, letting the greasy goodness settle in my stomach.
“Vegan cheese but no vegan burger meat?” he asked. His tone wasn’t teasing. He looked genuinely confused.
I finished chewing and swallowed before answering. “I’m allergic to cow’s milk. So no regular cheese for me.”
“Ah. That’s unfortunate,” he said.
“It’s fine. There are enough alternatives nowadays,” I told him with a small shrug. I grabbed a fry and looked around as the guy moved his attention to someone else at the bar.
The food helped more than I expected. The tight feeling in my chest eased a little with every bite, and I started to think I could get through the night without letting my nerves get the best of me. I focused on what was making me happy.
But right when I thought I could relax, I spotted two faces I didn’t want to deal with. Karlee and Kira were standing in the middle of the dance floor. They looked around the room with those same uninterested, irritated expressions they always had.
“Great,” I muttered, turning my back to them and facing the bar again.
“What?” Holland leaned in closer, trying to read my face. “Oh no. Who is here? Who do I have to fight?”
“Nobody,” I said, letting out a long sigh. “It’s just two of the actresses Callan works with all the time.”
Holland twisted around to look, scanning the room until she spotted the two blondes. She made a face right away. “Ah. I see them. Did they do something to you?”
I hesitated. It was hard to explain, because they had never done anything dramatic. Just small comments. Small looks. Enough to make me feel small. “They have not exactly been nice to me,” I said quietly.
Holland let out a disgusted sound. Her shoulders pulled back, and her whole body stiffened like she was ready to stand up and march over there. “So I really do need to fight them.”
“No.” I reached for her arm and held on before she could actually move. “It’s fine, Holls. Seriously. I just didn’t expect to see them here. I’m not letting them ruin anything. I’m having a great time tonight.”
She looked at me for a moment, trying to judge if I was being honest or if I was just trying to avoid making a scene. Her eyes narrowed a little. “Fine. But if they do or say anything to you tonight, I’m going into protect-mode.”
I laughed and squeezed her arm once before reaching for another fry. “Thanks, Holls. You’re the best.”
I pushed open the door to the women’s bathroom with Holland at my side a little later that night. My hair was stuck to my neck, and I just wanted to freshen up a bit, fix my makeup, and go back to enjoying the night.
Holland was still talking about some guy who tried to buy her a drink when the door swung open again.
I didn’t even have to turn around to know who it was, because I recognized their perfume.
It was the same scent that had lingered on the bed in the filming room, and though it was a good, expensive scent, it wasn’t so nice with my knowledge of who wore that perfume.
Karlee and Kira walked in like they owned the room. They moved in short, restricted steps because their dresses were so tight that even walking looked like hard work. They stopped behind us, their eyes locked on me first, then flicked to Holland, then back to me through the mirror.
We both turned around, and I felt Holland tense beside me. I reached out and lightly touched her arm, silently telling her not to jump in or start anything. We were classier than that.
“Oh,” Kira said, her mouth curling into a mean smirk. “Look who it is.”
Karlee stepped closer, wearing that same fake-sweet smile she always used when she was about to say something awful. “We were wondering when we’d run into you.”
I tried to keep my voice steady. “I’m trying to have a good night. So if you don’t mind, I’d like to keep it that way.”
Karlee laughed under her breath. “Right. A good night. Must be hard when you’ve been…exposed.”
My stomach dropped. I didn’t understand at first. Exposed? What did that even mean? I looked at her face, at the way her eyes gleamed like she was excited to hurt me.
Kira pulled out her phone.
“What are you doing?” Holland took a protective step forward, sticking to her promise to stand up for me in case they wanted to mess with me.
Karlee rolled her eyes at her. “We’re not talking to you, slut.”
“You’re calling me a slut?” Holland asked, her words laced with amusement. “How ironic.”
“Holls,” I pleaded, not wanting her to start a fight with someone like Karlee.
My eyes flicked back to Kira who was swiping and tapping on her screen, then she turned the phone and lifted it higher so we could both see.
As much as I didn’t want to look, my eyes still landed on the screen.
A video was playing, and it only took half a second for my brain to process what I was seeing. Callan and I on the couch, fucking, with my face visible and recognizable.
My heart slammed against my ribs so hard it hurt, and I stopped breathing.
Holland gasped. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
Karlee shrugged like she’d been waiting for this moment. “It’s all over one of the porn sites,” she said. “Trending, actually. Callan’s fans are going insane. Thought you should know.”
My legs went weak. I grabbed the edge of the sink to steady myself, but the room was spinning too fast. That day on the couch with Callan, when Karlee walked in on us…
it all started to connect now. There were no cameras in the living room, and he would’ve never filmed something like that without asking.
This was Karlee. She did this. She filmed us that day.
My voice shook. “Delete it.”
Kira tilted her head. “We didn’t upload it.”
“You’re lying!” I cried.
Kira was still unfazed. She rolled her eyes at me. “Calm down. Everyone saw it already anyway. It won’t make a difference if it gets taken down.”
Everyone.
Everyone saw it.
That made my stomach twist, and I felt like throwing up.
Holland stepped forward with a fire I’d never seen in her. She had been protective since the beginning of our friendship, but this was different. “Delete it. Right now.”
Kira made a disgusted sound as she grimaced. “Ew, get away from me, you weirdo.”
Holland wasn’t having any of that though. She took another step closer until she was right in Kira’s face. “I said, delete the video. Right now.”
“We’re just doing her a favor here,” Karlee said, stepping between them. “Besides…this could kickstart her own porn star career. Wouldn’t that be nice, Lana?”
She looked at me now, and my cheeks burned with shame. I never belittled them for what they chose to become in life, never once diminished their work or thought they were worth less because of it. But this wasn’t what I wanted to be. I was never meant to be in front of a camera, only behind it.
But they had ruined my reputation with one vile decision.
“Turn it off,” I whispered, unable to get my voice to rise. I wanted it to stop. I couldn’t listen to it any longer.
Before Kira even had the chance to think about turning the video off, Holland snatched the phone out of her hand so fast that Kira let out a shocked noise.
“Hey!” Kira snapped, reaching for it.
Holland stepped back and held the phone out of her reach. “You think you can show her something like this and walk away without consequences?”
Karlee scoffed. “It’s already out there anyway. Turning it off won’t change anything. Don’t you understand that?”
Holland’s jaw tightened. “You filmed her without her consent. You’re sick.”
Karlee didn’t blink. “Please. She knew what she was doing. She’s been trying to get close to Callan for months. Besides…he didn’t mind the video.”
He knew about it?
Didn’t he stop them from uploading it?
My chest tightened so hard that my lungs felt like they were collapsing. I felt exposed in a way I never had before. And I hated the feeling. It was hurting and numbing all at once.
Holland looked at me. She must have seen the panic on my face because the decision snapped through her fast.
Without a second thought, she smashed the phone against the wall.
The sound echoed through the bathroom. A sharp crack, glass breaking. Pieces hit the tiles, and the video finally cut off.
Kira screamed. “Are you insane?”
Holland didn’t flinch. “Get another one. And stay the hell away from her. We’ll be taking legal action.”
Karlee stepped forward like she wanted to fight, but the look in Holland’s eyes stopped her. Holland wasn’t just angry. She was ready to throw them through the mirror if they tried anything.
Holland snapped. “Get. Out.”
Karlee smirked, not bothered even the slightest that this could have serious consequences for them. “Enjoy the rest of your night, ladies.”
She picked up her broken phone, then they left the bathroom without a second glance. They just turned their backs and stepped out the door as if what they’d shown me meant nothing. As if they hadn’t just ripped through my privacy and dignity in a way I could never take back.
When the door shut behind them, all the strength left my body. My knees buckled and I broke down to the floor. Holland rushed to me and grabbed my hands.
“Lana, hey. Breathe. Just breathe.”
I tried, but the air wouldn’t come. My chest tightened with every breath I tried to take, and my vision blurred. The panic was so sharp it felt like it was cutting me open from the inside.
“They saw me,” I choked out. “People saw me. Everyone saw me.”
“Hey, no, stop.” She cupped my face in her hands. “We’re going to handle this. You’re not alone. We’ll figure out how to get it taken down, and then we’ll punish them. We’ll fix it. I promise.”
I nodded, but I didn’t believe anything could be fixed.
Not right now. All I could feel was the humiliation and fear, and the sense of violation.
I didn’t know who to be angry at. The girls for showing me?
At myself for being so careless in my most intimate moment?
Callan, who knew about this and still let it be uploaded?
I pressed my hands to my face, trying to think, but everything was too loud inside my head.
Holland pulled me into a hug, and I held on because it was the only thing keeping me somewhat steady.
“We’re leaving,” she said firmly. “Now. Come on.”
I nodded again and let her help me back on my feet. I couldn’t feel the ground, and my legs were still shaking, but with her steadying me, we managed to get out of the bar and into an Uber.
On the drive home, all I could think about was the video.
My face on that screen.
Callan.
What this would do to me, because he was already in that world.
I feared that nothing would ever be the same after tonight, and all I wanted to do in that moment was kick and scream.