Chapter 1 #2
When Gray had met Jack Storm in San Francisco two decades earlier, the lanky blond had had a boyfriend, so Gray had done the honorable thing and kept things friendly.
At the time, he was sure the thing between Jack Storm and Jaime Snow wouldn’t last long because to Gray, it was clear that Jack deserved way better than what Jaime gave him.
Unfortunately, he had been wrong in that assessment and the two had petered along for a decade.
After following Jack from San Francisco to Seattle and spending years on the sidelines, ten of those trying to help Jack heal from what he had always viewed as a toxic relationship, he was damned if he’d miss his shot.
If Jack was finally ready for a relationship, Gray would prove that he was the best man for the job.
***
“You are so controlling!”
If he weren’t thoroughly emotionally exhausted, Jack would have looked around to see if he knew anyone within earshot.
The tantrum taking place in front of him would have been embarrassing when he was first old enough to buy a drink.
Being part of this scene when he was over twice that age made him question his decision to wade back into the dating pool.
“Are you even listening to me?”
He pushed away his unfinished scotch—alcohol on an empty stomach wasn’t a good mixer with the already unpleasant evening—and scooted to the side to face Devon.
“I heard every word you said.” With the unnecessarily loud volume of his date’s ravings, there was no way for Jack to avoid hearing him.
Thankfully, the stools on both sides of them were empty.
He could only hope the ambient noise in the room and the high ceilings meant the sound wasn’t traveling farther than that.
“I wasn’t going to do anything with that guy. It was an innocent conversation.”
Maybe Devon hadn’t been trying to pick up the man he was chatting up when Jack arrived, but that didn't change how close they were standing or the way Devon was looking at him.
To Jack, that was how you interacted with your boyfriend, not a stranger.
He had a great career and incredible friends, and he had learned to be comfortable living alone.
If he was going to open his heart and his life to someone, it would be a guy who added value, not insecurity and a sense of worthlessness. Not again.
“Aren’t you going to say something?”
Asking how much longer the conversation would take would have been rude. Jack kept his mouth shut.
“We were meeting here for dinner, Jack. I’m not an idiot. Why would I try to get with somebody else knowing you’d catch me?”
That could be true or it could be a lie.
It didn’t matter either way, because Jack wasn’t interested in being with a man who wanted to sleep or flirt with other men while he was with him.
He wanted someone who would treat him and their relationship like something valuable, and it was clear that Devon wasn’t that person.
“Okay, fine, maybe I was flirting with him a little bit.”
On Jack’s gauge, it was more than a little, but again, he didn’t say anything because it no longer mattered. This was the last time he would see Devon.
“But we’ve never talked about being exclusive and you haven’t been taking us seriously.” He waved his hand back and forth between them.
“I guess that makes two of us.”
“I’ve been trying, Jack! You’re never available, you’re cold, and you refused to spend any time with me last weekend.”
“I work a lot and I had plans last weekend.” When he wasn’t working or with Gray, he had been at a New Year’s Eve party with his friends.
He could have brought Devon to the party, but he hadn’t wanted to spend that much time with him.
Or really any time. Maybe he had a point about Jack being cold, though he thought a better description of himself was broken.
“That’s why I had to flirt with that guy. I was doing it for you.”
That was surprising enough to get Jack’s attention. He furrowed his brow.
“You know the old trick. Make a guy jealous, show him you have other options, and then he’ll realize he can lose you.”
Was the next part of that trick watching the guy go home alone, change into his sweatpants, and curl up in bed with a book and a bag of potato chips?
Because that was exactly what Jack planned to do.
His friend Gray had brought him a bag of Lay’s Lime chips a few days earlier and Jack planned to dip them in crushed avocado.
Needing to expedite that inevitability, he said, “Devon, this isn’t going to work out. ”
“Are you kidding me?” The yelling had now transitioned to screeching with an added bonus of finger pointing. “Seriously, how are you this cold?”
“Settle down,” a familiar gravelly voice said from behind him. “I’ve only known you for one conversation, but I’m already exhausted by you.”
“Hi, Gray.” Jack rubbed his palms over his eyes. “How long have you been standing there?”
“Long enough.” Big hands curled over his shoulders and rubbed his tense muscles.
“Anyone else with you?” Jack quietly asked, too worried about that possibility to turn around and check for himself. Gray witnessing this humiliating scene was fine, but he didn’t want anyone else to see the level of pathetic that was his attempt at dating.
“No. Kev, Eric, and Thom are at a table.” Gray’s body skated across Jack’s back as he leaned forward. “Or were at a table. Looks like it’s being bussed now.”
“Okay.” Jack relaxed and reclined against Gray’s firm chest. “Thanks.”
“Who are you?” Devon demanded.
“I’m Jack’s,” Gray said.
“Jack’s what?”
“Have you eaten?” Gray whispered into his ear.
“No.” Jack shook his head and then tilted it back and met Gray’s green-eyed gaze.
“I haven’t either.” Gray slid his hands to Jack’s upper arms and gave him a squeeze. “Let’s get a table.”
“Excuse me,” Devon said, both hands in the air. “We are on a date.”
“Date’s over.” Gray curled one arm around Jack’s waist and helped him off the stool.
“Are you sure it's not too late to get a table?” He reached for Gray’s wrist and turned it so he could see his watch. “Huh. It’s only nine fifteen. Feels like I’ve been here for hours.”
Gray flicked his gaze to Devon and then back to Jack. “That makes sense.”
Holding back his laughter, he asked, “Is this a new old watch?” Gray was the only person he knew who wore wrist watches and he had a fondness for vintage ones.
“Yes.” He rubbed his thumb up and down Jack’s waist. “You always notice the little things.”
“So this guy can have his hands literally all over you, but I can’t talk to someone without you freaking out?”
He answered Devon but didn’t look away from Gray. The evening’s drama had him feeling fragile and Gray was his safe space. “It’s not the same thing.”
“Why not?”
“Because Gray’s my friend.”
“Really? That’s not how I touch my friends.”
With Gray pressed to him from thigh to shoulder and Gray’s hand on his nape, Jack could see Devon’s point, but he didn’t need to waste energy explaining his friendship to someone he wouldn’t go out with again anyway.
For months, Gray had come to his house in the middle of the night and wiped his tears and his nose while he held him.
He had cooked for him and made him eat when he couldn’t be bothered.
He had driven him to his therapy appointments, sat in the waiting room while Jack slayed himself open, and then taken him home and curled up on the sofa with him and watched movies late into the night.
Gray had taken every call, whether it was at three in the morning and he was asleep or at three in the afternoon and he was in a meeting.
He had reminded Jack about his desirable qualities when Jack had stopped believing they existed.
Other than his ex, Gray was his oldest friend, and Jack hadn’t exactly been able to count on Jaime to help him heal from the trauma of their relationship.
“Take care, Devon.” He and Gray started walking away from the bar in concert.
“Unbelievable,” Devon shouted.
Gray stopped and turned around. “Devon, is it?” he asked.
“Here’s a free piece of advice from my grandmother.
If you don't remember your manners, everybody else will. You’re in public.
Keep your voice down.” He took a step toward Devon.
“And here’s another freebie, this one from me, stay away from Jack. ”
Jaw dropping, Devon stared at Gray silently. After a few quiet seconds ticked by, Gray returned to Jack and put his hand on his lower back.
“You okay?” Gray asked.
“Yes. Thanks for your help. Sorry you had to see that.”
“Sorry you had to experience it.”
“It’s a good reminder of why I shouldn’t bother trying to meet someone. It’s easier being alone.”
“I hear you.” Gray smoothed his palm up and down Jack’s lower back, soothing him. “It’s rough out there. But don’t tap out just yet. Your man’s here.”
“Do you really think there’s someone out there for me?
” Jack turned his head and looked into Gray’s sparkling green eyes, hoping he really believed what he was saying.
The years of therapy had helped, and Jack no longer considered himself worthless.
He was satisfied with his life and he was fine alone.
But he still desperately longed to find his person in the world.
Someone who wanted to hear about his day and kiss him goodbye.
Someone who would light up when he walked into the room.
Someone who wouldn’t be able to keep his hands off him.
A soft smile on his caring face, Gray leaned forward and kissed Jack’s forehead. “I know there is.”