CHAPTER 29
I can’t seem to focus on the flower arrangement in front of me. The roses keep blurring as my mind drifts back to that night in Gavin’s kitchen. My cheeks flush at the memory of his hands, his lips… then the crushing wave of panic that followed. He’s been nothing but kind these past two days, giving me space while making sure Sophie and I have everything we need.
“Mama, look!” Sophie holds up her drawing, crayon marks creating a sunflower. She’s settled at the small table in the corner of the shop where Mary Beth keeps art supplies for visiting children.
“That’s beautiful, baby.” I force a smile, trying to ground myself in the present moment. The familiar scent of flowers usually calms me, but today my nerves feel raw, exposed.
The shop’s bell chimes and my heart lurches into my throat. The shears clatter from my trembling hands onto the wooden workbench.
“Bailey?” Mary Beth’s concerned voice carries from her office. I hear her chair scrape against the floor as she stands to check the front.
I grip the edge of the workbench, willing my breathing to slow. Sophie continues coloring, humming softly to herself, oblivious to my distress.
“Oh, Molly! What a lovely surprise.” Mary Beth’s warm greeting floods me with relief.
Just Molly.
“I come bearing caffeine!” Her cheerful voice grows closer. “I figured you guys could use an afternoon pick-me-up.”
I straighten up, wiping my sweaty palms on my apron as she rounds the corner into the workspace. Her copper hair is curled in loose waves and it sways with her every step. She’s juggling a drink carrier and what looks like a pastry bag.
“Hey y’all.” She sets everything down on a clear spot of the workbench. “I brought you a Honey Lavender Latte. Beau said you liked it the other day when you came in.”
“Oh, thank you. You didn’t have to do that.” My voice comes out shakier than I’d like.
“Course I did. That’s what friends are for.” She pulls out a cup and hands it to me, then peers at my unfinished arrangement. “Though it looks like you might need something stronger than coffee. Everything okay?”
Before I can answer, Sophie spots her. “Miss Molly!” She abandons her drawing and runs over for a hug.
“There’s my favorite artist!” She says. “What masterpiece are you working on today?” As Sophie shows Molly her drawing, I take a long sip of coffee, letting its warmth settle my nerves. Mary Beth catches my eye from the doorway and gives me a sympathetic nod.
“So what brings you in today, Molly?” Mary Beth asks, moving to arrange some fresh stock.
“Oh! I need something for my dining room table. Will’s parents are coming for dinner tomorrow and I want it to look nice.” She says looking around the space. “Any suggestions?”
“What about these dahlias?” Mary Beth gestures to a bucket of vibrant blooms. “They’d make a lovely centerpiece.”
I try to focus on their conversation, but my hands won’t stop shaking. The coffee cup trembles slightly, and I set it down before I can spill it.
“Bailey?” Molly’s voice breaks through my haze. “You’re usually full of ideas. What do you think would work best?”
“I…” The words stick in my throat. How do I explain that I can barely string together a coherent thought, let alone design a centerpiece?
Mary Beth steps in smoothly. “Bailey’s been helping me with some special orders today. Why don’t I show you what we have in season?”
As they move toward the front of the shop, Sophie tugs on my apron. “Mama, can I have my juice?”
“Of course, sweetie.” I welcome the distraction, retrieving her cup from my bag. The simple task of unscrewing the cap helps steady my hands.
“Is Tommy coming too?” Sophie asks hopefully, taking her cup.
“Not today, honey. But maybe we can arrange a playdate soon?” Molly calls back.
I watch Sophie return to her coloring, her small face scrunched in concentration. She seems content, like the other night didn’t phase her, but I know. I know it did and she’s trying to put on a brave face. The contrast between her calm and my internal chaos makes my chest ache.
“These are perfect!” Molly’s exclamation draws my attention. She’s admiring a bunch of coral dahlias Mary Beth has pulled together.
The shears on the workbench catch my eye, their sharp edges glinting. For a moment, I’m back in our old kitchen, Matt advancing toward me with that glinting look in his eyes that meant pain was coming.
“Bailey?” Molly’s voice sounds far away. “You’ve gone white as a sheet.”
Mary Beth appears at my side. “Why don’t you take a break, dear?”
I shake my head. “I’m fine, I just…”
“Mama?” Sophie’s worried voice cuts through everything else. She’s standing now, her drawing forgotten.
“It’s okay, baby.” I force myself to breathe deeply. “Mama just needs a minute.”
“I can watch her if you want to step out,” Molly offers, concern etched across her face.
The thought of leaving Sophie, even for a moment, sends fresh panic coursing through me. “No, I… I’ll take her outside with me.”
Mary Beth gives me a small smile.
Sophie runs to take my hand, her small fingers wrapping around mine like an anchor. I let her lead me through the back door and into the early summer air, the afternoon sun warms my skin.
“Look, Mama!” Sophie points to a butterfly landing on a purple bloom in the grass behind the building. “It’s dancing!”
I sink onto a wooden bench, pulling her into my lap. The familiar weight of her grounds me as I breathe in the fresh air.
“Are you scared again?” Sophie’s question catches me off guard.
“A little bit,” I admit, pressing a kiss to her hair. “But you make me brave.”
She turns in my lap to face me, her ice-blue eyes serious. “Ms. Lucy says being scared is okay sometimes.”
A laugh bubbles up unexpectedly. “Well, she’s right about that.”
“And she says hugs help too.” She throws her arms around my neck, squeezing tight.
Over her shoulder, I see Molly step through the back door, hesitation clear in her stance. She doesn’t know about Matt, about why we’re really here. All she knows is her friend is struggling.
“Mind if I join you ladies?” she asks softly.
Sophie loosens her grip enough to look at Molly. “We’re having hugs.”
“Hugs are the best.” Molly sits beside us on the bench. “Your coffee’s getting cold inside. Want me to bring it out?”
I shake my head. “Maybe just… sit with us for a bit?”
She nods, she’s perceptive even without knowing the whole story. “As long as you need.”
We sit in comfortable silence, Sophie pointing out butterflies and bees while the grass and flowers sway in the breeze. Slowly, my heartbeat returns to normal, the panic ebbing away like a receding tide.
I finish up my last customer order of the day, carefully wrapping the bouquet of pink carnations and baby’s breath in kraft paper. As I hand it back to Mrs. Moore for her daughter’s piano recital, Mary Beth starts closing up the shop, humming a familiar tune while she works.
“Bailey,” she calls from the back room, “don’t forget to water the new shipment of orchids before you leave.”
“Already done,” I reply, proud of staying on top of things despite everything that’s been happening and my mini meltdown earlier.
My phone buzzes in my back pocket, I hesitate and then see it’s from Gavin.
“Just wrapping up at the clinic. Heading home to start dinner,” his text reads. “Making chicken alfredo tonight with a secret ingredient you won’t see coming. Hope you’re hungry.”
A small smile plays on my lips as I read his text, but it fades quickly as anxiety creeps back in. Everything with Gavin feels too good, too perfect. And in my experience, that’s never a good thing.
“ Sounds amazing. Leaving here soon, ” I type back, tucking my phone away.
“Mommy, look!” Sophie’s voice carries from the back room. She’s holding a child-sized broom Mary Beth got just for her, carefully sweeping fallen petals and stems into a pile
“Great job, baby.” I catch Mary Beth’s indulgent smile from across the room.
“Such a good helper.” Mary Beth walks over to us. “You’re going to be running this shop before we know it, Miss Sophie.”
She beams at the praise, continuing to sweep. I gather our things while she finishes up—my purse, Sophie’s backpack with her coloring books and crayons, the lunch containers from earlier.
“Y’all drive safe now.” Mary Beth walks us to my car.
“Thanks, Mary Beth. See you tomorrow.”
Once Sophie’s buckled into her car seat, I slide behind the wheel and instantly lock the doors, letting out a long breath. The setting sun casts long shadows across the dashboard as I pull onto Main Street. My mind wanders to earlier, to my urgent need to feel something other than fear with Gavin. The way his hand had curved around my waist, how his fingers sent an explosion of life back into me, if even for a brief moment. How Matt ruined the moment when he intruded on my thoughts.
“Mommy?” Sophie’s voice breaks through my thoughts.
“Yes, baby?” I glance at her in the rearview mirror. She’s hugging Mr. Hoppy.
“I’m hungry.”
“Well you’re in luck then. Gavin is at his house making us chicken alfredo for dinner with a surprise in it.”
“I hope it’s not broccoli.” Her nose scrunches.
“You liked his broccoli last time he made it,” I remind her, turning onto the road where towards Gavins house
“That’s ‘cause he put cheese on top.” She pauses. “Mommy, can Tommy come to your birthday party?”
My hands tighten on the steering wheel. I’d almost forgotten about my birthday this weekend. “What birthday party, sweetie?”
“The one Gavin and Ms. Lucy were talking about when you were in the bathroom. Oops!” She claps her hands over her mouth. “I wasn’t supposed to tell!”
Her little face falls, her eyes suddenly pooling with tears. “I wasn’t s’posedto tell,” she whispers again, looking absolutely crushed. “Gavin said it was a secret surprise.” Her bottom lip quivers as she stares down at her hands in her lap.
“Oh, sweetie,” I reach back to squeeze her knee as we come to a stop sign. “It’s okay. Sometimes surprises slip out. That happens to everyone.”
“Even you?” She sniffles, wiping her nose with the back of her hand.
“Even me,” I assure her with a smile. “Secrets are hard to keep when you’re excited.”
Her shoulders relax a little. “So you’re not mad?”
“Not even a tiny bit.” I smile at her through the rearview mirror. “And now I can be extra excited about whatever the surprise is. That’s actually better.”
Her smile slowly returns, relief washing over her features.
The last birthday I celebrated was four years ago, before Matt started isolating us from friends and family. Before the controlling behavior escalated to…
No. I won’t go there. Not now.
I pull into Gavin’s driveway, parking beside his truck. “Okay, let’s go see what surprise Gavin put into dinner tonight.”
The house smells amazing when we walk in. Chicken, garlic, butter, something else I can’t quite place. Gavin’s in the kitchen, sleeves rolled up to his elbows as he stirs something on the stove. He looks up as we enter.
“Hey there, you two.” Gavin’s face lights up when he sees us. He’s wearing a dark blue apron with ‘Kiss the Chef’ written across it in faded letters. “Perfect timing.”
Sophie rushes toward him, her little legs carrying her across the kitchen floor with impressive speed. “Mommy said you’re making chicken with a surprise!”
Gavin chuckles, setting his wooden spoon down to give Sophie a high-five. “That’s right, and it’s almost ready. Just about three more minutes.” He glances up at me, and something in his gaze makes my stomach flutter. “You two should go wash up, and then we can eat.”
“Come on, Mommy!” Sophie tugs at my hand, pulling me toward the hallway bathroom.
I hesitate, caught in Gavin’s warm gaze. He smiles at me—not just any smile, but one that reaches his eyes. It’s the kind of smile that feels like a conversation all its own, telling me that we’re okay.
My cheeks warm under his attention, and for a brief moment, I forget about everything else, about Matt, about running, about the constant fear.
“I’ll be right there, Soph,” I call, my eyes still locked with Gavin’s.
She disappears down the hallway, and Gavin takes a half step toward me, then stops himself. “Go on,” he says softly. “I’ve got everything under control here.”
I nod, finally breaking eye contact. As I follow Sophie to the bathroom, I can still feel the warmth of his smile on my back.