Chapter Sixteen
Levi “Ice”
I pant against Viking’s back as I still inside of him. I had just taken him against the bathroom counter. I am completely addicted to this man.
“Are you guys done yet? Because I really have to pee,” Ana shouts from the bed.
“You could have used it,” Viking says with a small smile.
“Yeah, I think it’ll be a little weird to be peeing while you guys are having sex. I don’t know if I’ll ever get to that point in the relationship,” Ana says with a laugh.
Ana heads to the toilet while I pull out of Viking and begin cleaning him up. I don’t know why, but I like cleaning these two up after I have fucked them.
Ana had gotten over her shyness about her bladder since it seems she has to go all the time. When she’s done and washes her hands, I can’t help but put my arms around her.
She has a bump already and, whenever I’m near her, I can’t help but put my hands on it.
It’s just crazy to me that there is a little life growing inside of her right now.
“What time is your appointment?” I ask her.
“In an hour. Are you both coming?” she asks, sounding unsure.
“Of course, we are both going to be there, Button,” Viking says while pulling her into his arms.
“Good. I know you guys can’t be at every appointment, but it will be nice when you can make it,” she says softly.
“One of us will always be with you. That way, you will never have to go alone,” Viking says.
I nod my head in agreement.
We all get ready for her appointment. I know that this time they will be able to hear the baby’s heartbeat, so that’s pretty exciting.
I know Ana had said she was nervous, since this is something she has wanted for such a long time.
I have a feeling that everything is going to be just fine.
It doesn’t take us long to get ready and head to the doctor’s office.
We get looks while we are waiting for Ana’s name to be called, but we just ignore them.
Once we are in the room, we are all nervously looking around. It only takes a few minutes when the doctor makes an appearance.
“Oh, everyone is here today,” the Doctor says with a smile.
“They were both free today,” Ana says with a smile.
I look at her in surprise that she told her doctor that there were two fathers.
I still don’t know how to stop feeling so shocked when they show me how they feel.
I know I can’t be living like this; with one foot out the door.
“It’s time to hear the heartbeat. Are you guys ready?” the doctor asks.
Ana nods her head eagerly.
It takes a few minutes but, when that sound comes from the speaker, I feel my knees get weak.
It’s the greatest sound in the world.
“Wow, this is a surprise,” the doctor murmurs.
“What’s wrong?” Viking demands.
“Oh, nothing is wrong, but I’m picking up a second heartbeat,” the doctor says with a smile.
My mouth drops open, but I’m sure I’m not the only one in shock right now.
“Did you just say twins?” Viking whispers. I’m not sure if it is said in dread or excitement. It’s hard to tell.
“I did. It looks like you guys are having twins, which will mean more check ups for Ana,” the doctor replies.
I listen along to everything that the doctor tells us and, the next thing I know, we are walking out of there and I’m still completely speechless.
“Twins. This is crazy,” I whisper.
Ana steps in front of me and looks into my eyes.
“Are you okay? I know you were okay with one baby, but two babies will be a lot of work,” she says softly.
“I’m not going to leave because we have another addition to our family,” I tell her.
“Are you sure you are ready to be a family?” she asks, looking uncertain.
“Do you not want me to be part of the family?” I ask her. Now I’m feeling uncertain.
“Of course, I do. I just noticed you are holding back, and I don’t know why,” she says with tears forming in her eyes. Fuck. I don’t want to make her cry. Those tears are gutting me.
“I just want to be sure that this isn’t some experiment for you guys. That you guys won’t just up and decide you had your fun and have no need for me anymore. I was just trying to save myself the pain,” I explain.
I look at her, and then at Viking. They both look hurt by my words.
“Is that what you really think of us?” Ana whispers, sounding pained.
“If that’s how you really feel, brother, why are you bothering with us? We have told you and showed you repeatedly, yet you still can’t trust us that our feelings for you are genuine,” Viking snaps.
“I trust you. I just don’t want to get tossed aside,” I state.
Ana shakes her head sadly. “No, you don’t trust us. I thought a day would come where you would, but you won’t let us in.”
“I do,” I whisper with my voice cracking.
Viking scoffs, sounding like he’s getting angry. “You don’t fucking trust us. I told you a couple weeks ago to call me Maverick, yet I haven’t once heard it coming from your lips. We both know what I meant when I told you to call me that. You also haven’t let us call you by your birth name. You never had any trust in this, or us.”
Hurt laces through me at his words. I know he’s right. I knew the full meaning of those words when he told me to call him Maverick and, no matter how much I tried, I couldn’t bring myself to call him that.
“You need to think about if this is what you really want. Maverick and I have shown and told you time and time again. There’s only so much we can do to convince you. It’s like you are keeping the door closed to yourself, and we are on the other side just asking you to open it,” Ana says with tears streaming down her face. She is looking at me with the heartbreak that I swore I would never put there.
“I do want you guys,” I start.
Ana shakes her head and wipes the tears off her face. “You can’t be half way in when we have twins on the way. It’s not fair to us or fair to them. If this isn’t what you want, then you need to decide that before they come. I won’t have someone in their life that’s just going to walk out.”
I start to open my mouth, but Viking cuts me off. “You need to think about it. Take some time. You know where we are when you make your decision.”
I swallow hard and nod my head.
I take off on my bike to clear my head and ride around for awhile.
I think about everything Ana and Viking said. I’m crazy about them. I know that for a fact.
Am I just going to let fear take over and cost me two of the greatest people in my life?
They have never once made me feel like I was an outsider looking in.
Everything that I am afraid of is in my own head.
I can’t lose them. I need to take the risk.
I know they are worth it.
With my decision made, I turn back towards the house. I’m about twenty minutes away.
All I can think about is them, so I don’t see the truck until it’s too late.
The truck slams into me and I’m thrown from my bike.
I turn my head to the truck and see someone getting out, but then there are a bunch of shouts of people running over to me, which seems to have scared him away.
All I can remember about him is that he has a scar on his face.
I can’t seem to make my body get up or move as everything hurts. Eventually, I feel darkness take over.
All I can think about is that I will never get to tell Ana and Maverick how I feel.
I will never get to hear them call me Levi.
Maverick “Viking”
I hated watching Ana walk out of my life when I thought I’d lost her and ruined everything between us.
Watching Ice walk away is filling me with the same pain, anger, and panic. I don’t know if he will take that jump with us, which worries me the most.
Ana is right though. We can’t just live our life while Ice has one foot out the door. It would feel like we would be waiting for him to walk out, and that’s no way to live.
I take a crying Ana to the vehicle. Once we get inside, she lets out sobs. There’s a mix of words that sound like she is requesting food. I’m not a hundred percent sure, but you can’t go wrong getting a pregnant woman food.
I stop at a couple places and run in to grab the food while Ana waits in the car. I know she won’t want anyone to see her like this, so I try to be as quick as I can before making our way home.
Ice’s bike is already gone when we get back. Once I get Ana settled on the couch with the food surrounding her, I check our bedroom. It looks like Ice took some of his things.
I squeeze my eyes closed as the pain hits me. “Please don’t give up on us,” I whisper brokenly to the room.
I compose myself before heading back to Ana. She has a movie on, but I can tell she’s not really watching.
“What if he walks away? Did I push him too hard?” she asks when I sit down beside her and put an arm around her.
I let out a sigh. “I think we just found out we were having two babies, and everyone’s emotions were really high; but we were also both feeling the distance he was putting between us.
“I didn’t realize how hard I had fallen for him until I watched him walk away. He’s become such an important person to me,” she admits.
“I know, Button. Me too. I pictured the three of us here, raising our kids. Being happy,” I tell her.
“I just don’t want to go through that kind of pain again. When you got distant and seemed uncaring, I didn’t know why or what I did wrong. I questioned everything I did and said. I’d go through everything over and over in my mind, and worry every day if it was the day that you were going to finally leave for good,” she says softly.
“Button…” I start, but she cuts me off.
“No, I need to say this,” she says before taking a big breath. “The loneliness kicked in and I wondered if I could live my life like this; unhappy and alone. The decision to walk away was one of the hardest things for me to do. Sometimes I wonder if it will happen again, and I’ll feel that emptiness all over again.”
“I knew from the moment I saw you that you were the one. Just keeping that part of me a secret from you made me feel guilty and like shit because it felt like you didn’t know all of me, which was true. I’ll admit, I was a shitty husband for a long time. I’ve been doing everything I can think of to try and show you I won’t be that man again. It’s going to take time, and I understand that. I know the moment you will have let me in again will be the moment I hear those three little words coming from your sweet lips,” I say, looking into her eyes.
“I hope I can let you in again one day,” she whispers.
I pull her close and just breathe her in.
Things can spiral out of control so fast. Life can change in an instant.
One minute I was happy hearing my babies for the first time, and now it feels like my relationship with Ice and Ana is on the rocks.
I wish there was a way that I could fix it.
I can’t force Ice to stay and let us in. I can’t make Ana believe in me and tell me she loves me.
It feels like one wrong move, and I could be completely shattered by the people who mean the most to me.
I don’t know how long I sit with Ana while she eats and watches her movie, since a different one seems to be playing now. Ana is asleep with her head in my lap. I didn’t even realize she moved.
My phone rings. I grab it out of my pocket, trying not to move too much so that I don’t wake up my woman.
I see it’s my Prez on the screen.
“Yeah, Prez?” I ask.
“You and Ana need to get to the hospital right away,” he says with his voice sounding rough.
“What’s going on?” I ask before sitting up, which makes Ana rouse from sleep.
“Ice was in an accident,” he states.
Panic takes over as I listen to his words.
“What’s going on, Mav?” Ana says getting more alert.
“We need to go to the hospital. Ice got into an accident,” I tell her.
She rushes to get up, panic taking over her face.
“What happened? Is he okay?” she asks, sounding like she’s trying not to cry.
“I don’t know, Button. That’s all Prez said,” I tell her.
She nods her head, and we quickly leave the house and hope our man is okay.
Ana
I try to remain calm and not let the panic take over. I’m glad that Maverick is driving fast and makes it to the hospital in record time.
Most of the club is already there when we arrive.
“What happened?” Maverick asks as we walk up to Prez.
“He was run off the road. We don’t know who did it yet, but we will find out who is responsible. Some people driving at the same time saw this truck speed up to run him off the road before taking off. There must have been too many people around for him to make sure he finished the job,” Prez says angrily.
“How is he?” I ask with tears falling just thinking of someone trying to take my man away from me.
“We don’t know. As he had made me his emergency contact when he moved into town, they had just called me and told me what happened and said that he was going to have surgery,” he tells us.
I fall into a chair behind me as my knees feel weak.
Maverick sits beside me and puts his arm around my shoulder.
I block everyone out and don’t take my eyes off the door, willing the doctor to come and tell us something.
We wait hours before a doctor appears calling for Levi’s family.
“He has severe road rash. There will be scarring on his face, and there was a puncture to his lung that he needed to have surgery on. He lost a lot of blood, and we had to do some transfusions. We did notice some swelling in his brain, so we have put him in a medically induced coma until it goes down. We don’t know if there was any damage from that until he wakes up.”
A sob escapes me. I could have lost him. This is bad, but it could have been worse.
“When can we see him?” Maverick asks.
“He’s in recovery right now. I’ll send a nurse when he’s in his room,” the doctor says.
I ignore everyone when they try to talk to me. I stare off into space thinking of how close I came to losing him. He’s still going to be in a coma, and we don’t know if there is any damage to his brain.
I hate that everything is up in the air right now.
I just want to wake up and find out that this is all a bad dream.
“Baby, we can go to his room now,” Maverick whispers in my ear. Maverick’s voice jolts me out of my thoughts.
Maverick grabs my hand, and we follow the nurse to Ice’s room.
I am flooded with even more fear when I see him hooked up to machines, and the road rash on his face. I don’t care if he scars from that. He will always be good looking to me.
“Fuck,” Maverick hisses out after seeing our man.
I sit down in a chair close to Ice’s bed and grab his hand.
“I’m so sorry, please come back to me,” I whisper with my voice cracking. I drop my head to the bed.
At some point, Maverick picks me up and puts me on his lap, but I don’t let go of Ice’s hand the whole time.
I know I need to snap out of it; this isn’t good for the babies, but I can’t seem to make myself. Ice means more to me than I even realized.
“Button, you need to eat,” he says roughly in my ear.
“I’m not leaving him,” I mumble.
“You don’t need to leave him, but you need to eat. I’ll even help you,” he says, and I nod my head.
Dani pushes a brown paper bag towards us and helps us grab the food out.
She gives me a sad smile, but I don’t respond as I don’t want to waste one moment before turning my attention back to Ice.
Maverick “Viking”
Seeing my wife struggle is hard.
She barely takes her eyes off of Ice. I think the only reason I can get her to eat is because of the babies. She doesn’t want to leave his side.
Fuck, I don’t want to leave his side.
I just want him to wake up and look at us.
I knew we both wanted him to be a permanent part of our lives, but this just hits home at how much we want him to be.
Those hours waiting to hear about him were excruciating.
I do everything I can to make sure Ana has everything she needs. I arrange for another bed to be brought in. I already know we won’t be leaving, at least until he wakes up.
Everyone has been so great with making sure we don’t have to worry about anything as well.
We will get through this.
We have to.