Chapter Fifty-One
I knew the role; I played the part. I’ve always given them what they want. On many occasions—far too many, in fact—this has been what has kept me alive. Even when it wasn’t the truth. Especially when it wasn’t the truth. Even when it felt like a part of me had to die to do so.
Now all of me has died. And I’m finally free.
This isn’t some fairy tale, and there’s no magical wand or benevolent prince coming to save me. I realized there would be no happy ending—unless I decided to write it.
I want more than mere survival.
I want to live. At long last, I’m going to make that happen.
Learn to swim. And then you’ll survive.
Walk fast before the snakes know you’re there.
All the ways I’ve been told to live. All the ways I’ve learned to survive.
The water rolls over me, around me, through me, washing me clean.
I release the gun, letting it plunge into the black water, and swim with all I have.
I move under the water, hidden by the pitch-dark night.
The ship grows smaller as all on board rush about.
I had them all hooting and hollering my name; now they are hollering my name for a very different reason.
Others are trying to restrain the madman on the deck as the engine pulls them too far away to see my receding figure, wrapped in night-black water, slipping away.
Find your light.
Now I move, quickly and quietly, before the light can find me.
I swim toward the shadowed shore, the opaque outline of Lady Liberty’s massive copper body rising up from her island perch.
My lungs burn, and so does every muscle in my body, but I know I have to hang on.
Learn to swim. And then you’ll survive. I pull myself forward through the water until I hear the blessed sound, faint, but coming closer.
Eventually the familiar voice mingles with the splashes of oars slapping the waves.
“That you, Ev?” Just where she said she’d be.
Meeting me just where I hoped I’d be, if the show went off as planned.
“Penny!” I gasp out, bobbing in the water, my breath ragged but strong. “Right on time.”
“That’s the thing about your lucky Penny,” she says. “I keep showing up.”