Chapter 32
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
Vanessa blinked awake as soft daylight filtered into the room, and she quickly remembered where she was.
A familiar, earthy scent curled up her nose, warming her from the inside out. Jordan’s scent. She inhaled deeply and stifled the moan that followed. It smelled so good, like a leather belt wrapped around a pine tree, that she burrowed deeper under the blanket.
Fully ensconced in the delicious smell, everything from last night slowly tumbled back to the surface of her consciousness. The temptation to never come out was strong, so she stayed there until the enticing scent of coffee made her poke her head out from under the covers.
She was in Sean and Ivy’s guest room. Ivy had said that her grandmother stayed here when she visited, so the lace-trimmed curtains and pale-rose wallpaper didn’t surprise her. But the thought of Jordan sleeping in this room that was befit for English royalty was pretty funny.
What did his own place look like? She realized she’d never asked him where he lived when he wasn’t pet sitting Nigel and babysitting her. She knew it was across the river, closer to The Link, but she didn’t know which neighborhood.
At one point, she imagined him living in a dark, uninviting basement that matched his mood. But now that she’d gotten to know this other side of him, she was curious. Where did a man like Jordan Thompson hole up with all his secrets and ghosts? Maybe it wasn’t all skulls and chainsaws.
The scent of bacon joined the coffee, and her stomach growled loudly.
Kicking off the comforter, she swung her legs over the side of the bed. His oversized hoodie swallowed her, falling almost to her knees, but it was so comfortable and smelled so good she didn’t bother searching for anything to replace it with.
Padding to the door, she nudged it open an inch and listened for signs of life.
She could hear the faint sounds of sizzling and the low hum of music. She nudged the door all the way open and wandered down the hall.
Jordan stood at the stove, wearing gray sweats and a t-shirt, looking hotter than anyone had the right to look after the night they had.
The sweats hung low on his waist, his toned ass looking mighty appetizing covered in the soft material. Never mind the riveting bulge on his front side. She could see the faint outline of a very generous-looking package. Was he wearing anything underneath? She was going to guess no.
“Hungry?” he asked, and her gaze jerked back to his face in time to see his smirk unfurl.
Yes, but not for breakfast. Something had shifted between them, and considering everything that had happened in the last twelve hours, clinging to their so-called disdain seemed childish.
She held his gaze, heat rising in her chest. “Starving.”
His Adam’s apple bobbed as he watched her prop her hip against the counter and smile at him. Good, she affected him as much as he affected her.
“I guess it shouldn’t surprise me that you can cook.” He had all kinds of skills she hadn’t expected.
Turning back to flipping the bacon, he shrugged. “I’m no Michelin chef, but I can make a few basics.” Grabbing a coffeepot, he filled a mug, added milk, and stirred.
He knew how she liked her coffee…her heart melted at that.
A shadow passed over his eyes as he handed it to her. “My mom taught me how to cook. She said a man should know how to feed himself and not make it anyone else’s problem.”
“Sounds like a wise woman.” She sipped her coffee and let out a soft moan as the rich liquid exploded on her taste buds. It might not have come from her espresso machine, but it was pretty damn good.
“She raised me and Sean to take care of ourselves and others.” He flipped another piece of bacon, then stared at the pan. “I failed her for most of my life.” A few seconds passed with nothing but the sound of meat sizzling between them. “She died disappointed in me.”
The way he said it, as though it were a simple fact and not the most gut-wrenching thing she’d ever heard, made her heart ache for him.
“You don’t know that.” Her hand itched to reach for his, to comfort the man who’d spent so long in his own head, he’d come to believe he was some kind of monster.
“I do know it.” He transferred the bacon to a plate lined with paper towel, then picked up a mixing bowl and poured batter into the pan, creating three perfect circles in the grease.
“The doctors said there was nothing they could do. The disease was advanced. Our insurance sucked. She knew she was dying.”
Vanessa tried to imagine a scenario where one of her parents was critically ill and didn’t have access to medical care. It made her feel sick.
“For a while, Sean and I both worked to pay for the medicine she needed to keep her comfortable. Sean worked legitimate jobs and I—” He concentrated on the bubbles popping up in the batter. “I brought home the cash we needed.”
“Your mother was dying. You did whatever you had to do.”
The laugh that huffed out of him was a cold and empty sound. “Make no mistake, princess. They say stress kills, and no one caused her more stress than I did.”
“Jordan—” She shook her head. What could she say when her heart was bleeding out for him, and he stood there flipping pancakes like he was telling her the weather report?
He was opening up, confiding in her, and as much as she wanted to soothe him with a hug, she also didn’t want him to stop being vulnerable with her. So she watched him in silence.
“I know what I am, what I did. I know she lost faith in me, and worse, lost trust.” He transferred the pancakes to a plate.
“I know I don’t get an automatic pass because I’ve been a good boy for a couple years.
Absolution isn’t that easy. The kind of penance I have to do will take decades, but none of that is going to stop me from asking you for something you’re not going to want to give me. ”
Her heart pounded in her chest, so loud she swore she could hear it over the sizzle of the pan. When he turned to her, his gaze was blistering, scorching her with the heat of a thousand suns.
He was already wrong, because in that moment he could’ve asked her for anything, and she would’ve laid it at his feet. “What is it?”
“I need you to trust me. No questions, no arguments, no storming off or giving me a death glare like you always do when I ask you to do something. Just…trust me, this once.”
“I don’t give you a dea—”
“Vanessa,” he bit out, his eyes hard, unwavering. “I’m serious. This is serious. Will you trust me?”
She bit her lower lip, because he was being serious. But so was she. There was only one answer. She nodded.
“We’re going to eat, and then we’re leaving.”
Sounded too good to be true. “Oh-kay,” she said slowly. “To where?”
“I’m not telling you.” He maintained eye contact, watching her closely. It was both unnerving and admirable that he could stay so cool and in control when her entire nervous system whirled like it had been run through an electric mixer.
“For how long?” Her voice barely wavered, and she gave herself a mental pat on the back.
“A few days. Maybe more.”
A few days? “I have the fashion show in New York next week. I have to be there at least the day before for final fittings.”
“We’ll talk about that when we need to. Right now, the priority is getting out of here.”
It was a funny thing, but the calmer he sounded, the more panicked she became. “Is he—” She couldn’t even say it. Think it. “Do you think he wants to hurt me?”
“I think he’s a crazy motherfucker who broke into your home, stole your underwear, and photographed you while you were naked. He’s already hurt you, and I’m not taking any chances that he’ll try again.”
She inhaled deeply through her nose, trying to remember the breathing techniques she’d learned he’d taught her recently. Nothing came to her mind. It had been wiped blank under Jordan’s penetrating stare and the terrifying reality of the situation.
“Okay.” She focused on the plate of bacon while she tried to make sense of everything he’d said. “Can I call my sister and my parents while we eat?”
“No.” He said it so coldly, she blinked up at him.
“They’ll be worried. They’ll want to know where I am.”
“They understand the gravity of the situation. They know you’re with me and that you’re safe. That’s all they care about right now.”
She must have looked as stunned as she felt because his expression softened the tiniest bit, and he said, “You can call them when I say it’s safe to do so.”
How had life shifted so dramatically in the span of a few hours? She felt like Sarah Connor being forced to live on the run in the Terminator movies. “And if I say no?”
Jordan exhaled, his massive chest rising and falling under the weight of his restraint.
“I’m really hoping you won’t. But if you do, then we stay here.
I lock this entire building down like it’s Fort Knox.
Gabe has agreed to close his bar, and Joel will reimburse him for his lost income.
And we’ll get security around the perimeter, so no one comes in and no one goes out.
” He gave her a pointed glare. “No one.”
Geez, sounds like fun.
“Can Nigel come?”
“No.”
She was starting to loathe his bluntness, but her annoyance was eclipsed by the desperation pressing on her chest. “But who will take care of him? He’s become dependent on me.”
Jordan rubbed the spot between his eyebrows like he was trying and failing to find patience. “Sean and Ivy come home in three days. Gabe can feed the rabbit until then.”
She let out a gasp of horror. “Gabe can’t take care of him! He doesn’t know how Nigel likes to be stroked between the ears, or that he needs to cuddle under your armpit before he falls asleep.”
Jordan stared at her, his mouth slightly parted, and slowly blinked.
“He has anxiety,” she whispered, lowering her gaze to the counter.
In the moment of silence that passed, she mentally prepared herself for the final no.
Mentally prepared herself for a trip to God knew where, for an indeterminate number of days, with a man that had her heart flying toward cardiac arrest, all without her support pet.
So, she was surprised when she heard the rough, “Fine, he can come.”
Her gaze flew to his. They stared at each other for several heated seconds, until she finally said, “Okay, I’ll trust you completely. This once.”
A slow breath released from his lips and the furrow between his eyes melted away…along with a corner of her heart. Luckily, the loud rumble from her stomach distracted them both.
“I hope you don’t expect me to travel on an empty stomach. I’ll take three pancakes, two pieces of bacon, and real maple syrup, please.”
An infinitesimal twitch popped on the corner of his mouth before he pivoted abruptly to plate her meal.
“Ineed to pack,” she said a few minutes later as she chewed her last bite of pancake.
They were fluffy and delicious, not bad for an ex-gang banger. Would he make them for her again, wherever they ended up?
“Will it be hot or cold? Do I need to pack a swimsuit? Sunscreen?”
“We’re not going to an all-inclusive resort, Your Highness.
And no, you don’t need to pack.” When she glared at him with a half-masticated pancake shoved to the corner of her cheek, he pointed to a small duffle bag that was propped against the door.
“Natalie collected a few things from your apartment while you were sleeping.”
She slid her narrowed gaze back to his, swallowed, and licked the remaining maple syrup off her lips, not missing how his eyes followed the movement. “While I was sleeping? Wasn’t she also sleeping?” It had been past two in the morning when he carried her to bed.
His brows pinched slightly. “She came this morning. It’s almost three in the afternoon.”
“What?” she shrieked, jumping up from her seat.
“You didn’t check the time?” An amused smile quirked his lips.
“No, I got out of bed and came out here.” She’d lost track of her phone. Had she even taken it to the bedroom with her?
“You were out like a log for over twelve hours. Nigel came hopping out about twenty minutes before you did, so I started breakfast.”
“Wow.” Her eyes widened. “I can’t remember the last time I slept that long.”
“You needed it.” The words he didn’t say were louder. Reminders of last night’s close call.
“I’ll wash the dishes and gather the last of what we need. If you want to shower or do anything else, now’s your chance. Natalie left a pair of jeans, a sweater, and a puffer coat for you on the couch, so you don’t have to travel in that.” He gestured to his oversized clothing hanging off her body.
Was that regret in his eyes? Did he like seeing her in his clothes? True to his typical self, his gaze shuttered, the mask back in place. She missed his vulnerability already. Maybe it would come out again when they reached their destination.
Where were they going? Would they be alone?
When she continued staring into space, he said, “You have fifteen minutes.”
She’d promised no questions, no pushback, only blind trust. So, without another word, she turned on her heel and headed to the shower.