Chapter Two
The trip from the concert venue to Ledger’s home was one of the most heartbreaking rides Kash had ever taken.
The silence tried to crush his ears. Ledger stared out the window.
Occasionally, he would swipe his eyes, but he never once looked Kash’s way.
Kash shouldn’t be here. While he would never hate himself for setting in motion pushing Valon to the top, he hadn’t considered how much Ledger had lost in his absence.
To be fair, no way in hell had Kash predicted Valon would turn into that asshole he had just seen.
They pulled into the driveway of a house Kash would never have pictured Ledger living.
It was massive for one person. He was willing to bet the place was a good eight thousand square feet.
Fuck. He couldn’t see Ledger milling around a house this big alone.
That sounded miserable. Ledger was too down to earth for this.
The space probably made his life feel empty as hell.
At least, Kash hoped that was the case. Maybe Ledger had remarried or had a boyfriend living with him.
For all he knew, Ledger might have step kids.
All the confusion he had experienced before leaving town was rushing back.
Ledger straightened from his slouch and cleared his throat.
“I guess this is where you’re living now.
When we get inside, I’ll show you around.
Just pick a room. It’s just me. Besides my bedroom, no one else uses any of the other rooms. Plus, Valon had every inch of the place furnished like I would be hosting overnight galas or something. Are you hungry?”
He really was alone in the world. Kash had to lock down his mind. “I was starving when I got off the plane. Now I’ve kind of lost my appetite.”
Ledger sniffed and met Kash’s stare. He looked…
empty. Kash didn’t know how to explain that.
“Sorry. I didn’t think of asking any questions.
Where are you coming from? I thought Steel Security was based here in California.
” He made a gesture as if wiping away the words. “Close by is what I should’ve said.”
He didn’t know how much he should say. Kash didn’t want to have to keep up with lies. “They actually have offices all over the country, but taking this job was a favor to my cousin. I’ve been living in Atlantic City for about a year, working odd jobs.”
“Your cousin?”
Kash nodded. “Steel.”
“Well.” Ledger climbed from the car and tipped the driver. He didn’t speak again until they headed inside. “That clears up one thing. Valon would know that.”
“Yeah.” Kash dragged out the word. “His claim of buying me for you is total BS, by the way. Not only do I not work for Steel full time, but he had someone else lined up to take this job and it fell through. I volunteered to come since he was a man short on live-in bodyguards.”
Ledger missed a step and spun. “You volunteered?”
A bright smile exploded across his face at Ledger’s open shock. “To be fair, I didn’t know it was you until I agreed to help.”
“And you still came.” It wasn’t a question.
Obviously, he came. Kash currently stood in Ledger’s mudroom.
Ledger looked right at him. He wouldn’t be a smart-ass and point that out, though.
Kash understood Ledger’s stance. The way he left town was something only a man with no plans of ever looking back would do.
A sad smile tugged at Kash’s lips as he stared into eyes that were a replica of the man Kash had thought he would spend the rest of his life with at one time in his life. “Of course I did. It’s you.”
For a moment, they simply held each other’s stare. Finally, Ledger cleared his throat. “Do you want to order something to eat? I’m starved.”
Kash fought the urge to rub his chest. Every second they were together felt wrong, but Kash wouldn’t back down. “Sounds great.”
With a dip of his chin, Ledger turned and led the way. “Would you like something to drink in the meantime?”
“Yeah. Point me in the right direction and I’ll help. I mean, what the hell, Ledger? This place is huge.” With every second that passed, the more the years fell away.
Ledger made his way into the kitchen. Kash wanted to look in every direction. He needed to make a security plan. Kash’s gaze wouldn’t budge from Ledger. Ledger flashed an embarrassed-looking smile. “Valon. I guess this is how he makes himself feel better about forgetting I exist.”
Kash hated that. “What’s Ry’s house look like?” He wasn’t being an asshole. Kash knew Valon. He had a very good idea of how Ledger would answer, but he knew saying the words out loud would brighten Ledger’s night.
Ledger snorted out a laugh. The sound made Kash smile.
Ledger snagged two glasses and a chilled bottle of wine.
“From my understanding, he’s living in an apartment at the back of his gym, which is a thing I didn’t know existed.
” Ledger poured two glasses, keeping his eyes locked on his task.
“I guess that’s how he got away with cheating for so long. ”
Kash hated Ry. He always had. The guy had always been a shady son of a bitch who treated Valon like shit. Apparently, Ledger hadn’t been getting loved properly either.
A hint of wickedness stoked inside Kash.
He wasn’t the sad fucker Valon had reduced him to being.
Kash had moved on and turned into a whore.
Self-proclaimed, of course. Kash grabbed a glass.
“It’s always been his loss. You’re still just as sexy as you’ve ever been, and you’ve always been hot as fuck.
” Kash wandered away to inspect the room.
He didn’t wait to see Ledger’s reaction.
Kash had questions he needed answered before settling in for the night.
If Ledger kept distracting him just by being himself, Kash would never learn why he was there.
Kash had to keep Ledger safe. No one else ever had.
Kash didn’t mind taking the job. Ledger deserved that much.
Through a quick tour and sharing dinner, Ledger couldn’t quiet his mind.
Kash was a grown man. Even in his teenage years, Kash had been an adult.
There had been many nights when they sat together and talked while Valon tried his best to juggle college and a budding music career.
Kash hadn’t been given the same advantages in life as Valon.
Neither Kash nor Ledger slept well. He supposed they had equally carried too much stress from being unwanted by the people who claimed to love them.
Kash had an alcoholic mom and a dad who had been long gone since childhood.
He had been the stable one. The man of the house who raised himself.
At seventeen, Kash’s mom finally drank herself to death.
As far as Ledger knew, Kash had never cried or mourned.
He simply used the money he had saved from working every gig he could and cremated her.
No one even noticed an underage boy living alone.
He just endured the years afterward. Then, Valon had started college, and the first signs of Valon leaving Kash behind had started.
Ledger had lost his husband. He supposed Kash had lost everything.
They never spoke about those things. Honestly, Ledger couldn’t even remember what they used to talk about.
While Kash had changed in looks, and he had obviously gained a ton of confidence along with bitterness, he felt the same to Ledger. He didn’t want to go to bed.
Kash didn’t bring up the reason he was needed until they sat on opposite sides of the couch, turned sideways to face each other. They nursed their wine and let their food settle. Ledger felt way too cozy for Kash to talk business, but it was inevitable.
“Tell me why you need a guard. I need all the details so I can protect you.”
Ledger had been vehemently opposed to this entire thing.
Now he felt kind of warm inside at the idea of someone wanting to keep him safe.
“Well.” Ledger leaned over and set his glass on the coffee table before getting settled again.
“After everyone disappeared into their lives, and Valon bought me this humongous house, I needed a distraction. Since Ry basically left with nothing but his clothes, all his books on nutrition and health coaching sat on the shelves. Don’t ask me why I moved those things here.
It just felt easier at the time. Then I got sick of looking at them, and pulled them off the shelf one day, intending to donate them.
But a tagline caught my eye, and I ended up reading every book instead. ”
“What was the tagline?” Kash sounded genuinely curious.
“Maybe you’re the problem.”
Kash’s eyebrows rose.
Ledger pushed on, hoping to zip through the embarrassing parts.
“Anyhow, I used what I learned to create a meal plan. Then I moved on to coming up with recipes that allowed me to eat enough to actually feel full. One night, I had a date, and I cooked. The meal turned out great even though the date didn’t.
However, while the guy ate, he said I should share my recipes.
They’d be a hit online.” Kash shrugged. “I’d never spent much time on social media, but I made some videos just for the hell of it.
Since I didn’t have many followers, I just did my thing as always.
I’d work out, shower, and then make a video while I cooked.
One night, I spilled hot marinara on my shirt.
It hurt like hell, so I quickly peeled off my shirt and tossed it away.
I was doing a live, so I didn’t think much about it.
It’s not like I could choose not to upload the video, so I just laughed off the whole thing. ”
“You blew up the moment they caught sight of that sexy body, didn’t you?”