Chapter Eight
It wasn’t hard to keep Ledger safe. The first few weeks of never leaving the house, Kash hadn’t really noticed.
They got their full workout every day using Ledger’s home gym.
Kash couldn’t keep his hands off Ledger, so he had no interest in being anywhere else.
It wasn’t until Kash really looked at things that he realized Ledger never did much of anything other than read, make videos and block disgusting people online.
He had always known Ledger to be an outgoing, active guy.
They used to do a lot of fun shit together.
Kash wasn’t complaining. If all he ever did again was enjoy Ledger’s company and body, he would die a happy man.
Kash wasn’t worried about himself. He couldn’t imagine this existence making Ledger happy in the long run.
Kash paused in the middle of working on a sketch. He glanced Ledger’s way. Ledger looked engrossed in his book. Kash considered leaving the subject alone, but he couldn’t.
“I’m surprised you don’t want to go shopping or to the library or something.”
Ledger glanced over in surprise. “Oh. I haven’t really gone out much since the threats started about eight months ago.
Things ramped up pretty hard shortly before you got here.
I started finding gifts on my car everywhere I went and notes taped to the front door.
It’s one thing for people to say shit online.
It’s a whole other when you feel like people are watching you every second of the day. ”
That irritated Kash more than just a little.
“Why didn’t you say anything when I got here?
I can keep you safe anywhere you want to go, but it’s helpful for you to tell me everything you’ve been going through.
” He didn’t mean to sound so accusatory, but fuck.
People were physically stalking him to the point of leaving shit on his car. That was need-to-know information.
Ledger shrugged. “Like I said, I don’t really go anywhere anymore, so I didn’t think about it.”
Kash stood and set his sketch on the coffee table before taking Ledger’s book and setting it next to the sketch. He lured Ledger to his feet. “We’re not doing this hiding shit. You’re not giving up your life over a few insane people. We’re going to the boardwalk and hitting the food trucks.”
Ledger chuckled as he let himself get dragged along. “Food poisoning be damned, eh?”
Kash couldn’t stop smiling. He didn’t give Ledger a chance to say no. Kash had his shoes on, waiting on Ledger to put his on too in under a minute.
Ledger wore a luminous smile and kept shaking his head as if Kash drove him crazy.
Kash had to look away to keep from jumping him.
Ledger was under his skin in every way. He never got enough.
The moment they were ready, he headed into the garage and straight to Ledger’s SUV.
They climbed inside and buckled their seatbelts.
Kash looked Ledger’s way to make sure he was good.
He found Ledger turned sideways with his head resting against the headrest, staring.
A smile exploded across Kash’s face. “What?”
“Nothing. I’m just admiring the view.”
Ledger really kept him smiling like an idiot. “I’m trying to get out of the house. Not in bed.”
Ledger laughed and sat properly.
Kash shook his head and hit the button to open the garage.
He slowly backed out and made sure the door closed firmly behind him before clicking the button on the key fob to set the alarm.
Once they were on their way, Kash automatically reached for Ledger’s hand.
When Ledger linked fingers with him, it hit Kash.
He had truly grown accustomed to being one half of a pair.
Without thinking, he always touched Ledger or shifted closer.
The moment Ledger had agreed to keep him, Kash had jumped straight into the role of a lifetime.
Holding hands was such a small thing. Kash couldn’t live without this again.
Thanks to traffic, it took nearly half an hour to reach their destination.
Another ten minutes to find a place to park and five minutes to walk the distance after they finally found something.
The scent of competing food smells wafted around them.
There was a long line for tacos while a few people watched candy bars being deep fried.
Another cart spun cotton candy. Kash forgot for a moment to check the crowd for anyone looking a little too hard in Ledger’s direction.
“I haven’t been here in years.”
Kash focused on Ledger at the statement.
“Me either. I used to hitchhike here when I was a kid. I’d walk by, smelling every stand, wishing I could afford anything at all.
Truthfully, every time I left, I couldn’t decide whether I felt better or worse.
I got to enjoy all the colors, sounds, and smells, but I also was reminded of how different and poor I was. ”
“It kills me how many stories you have like that.”
Kash’s gaze skimmed the crowd. “It’s all good. I can get whatever I want now.”
Ledger’s fingertips skimmed Kash’s arm, pulling his attention Ledger’s way.
“Tell me what you always wished for the hardest while you were here. All I ever did was lose way too many quarters in those machines that push out more quarters and prizes over the edge if you do it just right, except they're rigged of course. So let’s focus on you.”
Kash chuckled while keeping his eyes moving.
Being out in the open like this was a challenge, but Kash was up for anything if Ledger was happy.
“I know the machines you mean. When I walked past them, I would always feel around and see if anyone had left any quarters in the tray. Once I found two, and when I played them, I won a cigarette lighter.”
A loud, surprised-sounding laugh burst from Ledger. “You would’ve been better off keeping the coins.”
Kash realized he was smiling. “Nah. I made a lot of campfires with that lighter. That mattered a lot when Mom would bring home strange men, and I stayed away to keep safe.”
“You said that wearing a smile. Meanwhile, I’m thinking of getting your mom an urn with Burn in Hell engraved on it.”
Kash couldn’t help but laugh at Ledger’s outrage.
“Those were some of my best memories. I was free and under the stars. Just me and my notebooks and dreams of running away. It was probably the most peace I got back then.”
Ledger didn’t respond.
Kash realized Ledger was more pissed off than he wanted to show. Kash shifted slightly, moving closer. “The fried cream cookies with whipped cream and chocolate syrup on top. That’s what I always wished I could get.”
“Then that’s what we’ll do first.” Ledger pushed in that direction, dodging the crowd like a man on a mission.
Love swelled in Kash’s chest. Ledger was the only person Kash had truly shared his past with.
Throughout childhood, he had feared anyone knowing what his home life was like because foster care was a hell of a lot worse.
So he stayed quiet. Something about Ledger always made him crack himself open for inspection.
Kash watched Ledger’s back while he ordered. He kept one ear on the conversation so he could pay. Ledger was too quick for him. He swiped his card so fast, Kash couldn’t even get out his wallet.
“I’ll pay you back tonight.”
The look Ledger shot him would’ve frozen boiling water in an instant. “Don’t cheapen this moment.”
Kash laughed at the bossy tone. He really was in love.
The guy in the booth handed Ledger two paper bowls that looked like diabetes. They ate as they walked. Silently, they eyed the sights. Neither of them spoke for several minutes.
Ledger shoved a bite into his mouth. He spoke around the food. “You know, this is actually pretty fucking disgusting.”
Kash burst out laughing. “It really is, isn’t it?”
In unison, they turned toward the nearest trash can.
Kash had a thought. He stopped Ledger before he could throw his bowl away.
“Wait. I’m never doing this again, so we need a trophy.
” He pulled out his phone and opened the camera.
“Come here.” They put their heads together.
Ledger held up his bowl between them. They both laughed, and Kash snapped their picture.
He couldn’t stop smiling at the image.
Ledger took his bowl and threw them both away before sliding in close to check out the picture. “That turned out surprisingly good.”
Kash nodded. “We look happy.” He saved the image as his wallpaper on his phone. When he looked over, he found Ledger staring at him in a way he couldn’t decipher. “What?” Even Kash heard the nervous laughter in his voice. Ledger looked entirely too intense.
“Ledger?”
Kash went on full alert at the sound of Ledger’s name, forgetting all about the strange moment. He made himself look bigger, attempting to protect Ledger from every angle. If Ledger was about to get mobbed, Kash would keep him safe.
Ledger turned. His expression snapped completely closed. “Ry.”
Kash was stunned into forgetting his job.
If Ledger hadn’t said his name, Kash never would’ve recognized him.
Not only had Ry already been considerably older than Ledger, but the years had not been kind.
He looked as if he had spent every minute of his life in a tanning booth while simultaneously getting bad plastic surgery to stretch out the wrinkles on his face.
Kash had never experienced such a gut wrench desire to punch someone first and ask questions later.
Ry looked a little too excited to see Ledger. “Hey. How have you been?”
Ledger subtly shifted Kash’s way, telling Kash everything he needed to know about this encounter. “I’ve been great. How about you?”
Kash wasn’t one to act and play nice just because that was what society expected. His every molecule screamed they should just walk away.