Chapter 14
Vera
V era’s excitement over her date with Isla was only slightly higher than her anxiety over what on earth she was going to wear. As per usual, she had stared blankly at the contents of her closet for nearly an hour before frantically calling Cameron to come over. Cameron had, thankfully, brought with her an assortment of dresses, tops, and pants for Vera to try on. However, she’d yet to find the perfect one.
“It has to be perfect,” she grumbled as she took off the paisley top and tossed it onto the pile on the floor. “This is my first real date with Isla. We’ve waited weeks for this and she’s got a sitter for Mason. So, I need it to be perfect.”
“It will be.”
Vera tossed up her hands and let them dramatically fall to her side. “How do you know?”
“Because you two are so hopelessly in love with each other that you might as well wear a wedding dress to dinner.”
“Stop it.” Rolling her eyes, Vera picked up another shirt from the pile Cameron had brought and put it on. “I like Isla, yes, but we are so not ready for marriage.”
“Mouth says no, but eyes say yes.”
“I’ve only known her for a couple of months.”
“Which is like two years in lesbian world.”
Vera rolled her eyes again. Over on the bed, Cameron sat up and swung her legs off the side.
“Look, I know this is all happening fast and that scares you because you’re Little Miss Always Needs A Detailed Plan.”
Vera started to protest, but knew Cameron had nailed her.
“You’ve worked your ass off at school and work and you're crushing your residency now. I know how much you want a family one day and all I’m saying is I think you’ve found it. I see the way your eyes light up when you talk about Isla and Mason. You’re in love, whether you want to admit that to yourself or not. And that top is the winner.”
Pursing her lips together, Vera studied herself in the full-length mirror. The simple gray sweater with black pants was indeed the winner. Vera turned toward Cameron with her hands on her hips.
“I really like her.”
“I know.”
“And I love Mason. She’s great. She's exactly the type of kid I’d want to have.”
“I know that, too.”
Vera bit her lip and lowered her gaze. “I can’t rush things with Isla. She’s been through so much with Blake. I don’t want to pressure her into a relationship before she’s ready, you know?”
“I do,” Cameron nodded. “I know I don’t know her, but I know what you’ve told me about her. And my gut is telling me that if Isla wasn’t ready for a relationship, she wouldn’t have asked you to be her girlfriend.”
Cameron was right, as per usual. If Isla wasn’t ready for them to date, she wouldn’t have asked Vera out. And if Vera ever got the impression that she was moving too fast for Isla, she knew she could and would slow down for her. Because Isla was worth waiting forever for. Vera knew that much without any doubt in her soul.
Just like she knew she was in love with Isla Mackenzie.
She could tiptoe around the reality all she wanted but at the end of the day, Vera knew the truth. Isla had taken a piece of her heart the first time they’d met. And ever since then, Vera had been giving her the rest of the pieces to hold. Her heart belonged to Isla, even if that scared her. Yes, things had moved quickly but Vera was certain she knew what she had with Isla was special.
And with any luck, she’d get to tell her all that tonight.
A knock at the door made Vera smile as she and Cameron hurried toward the front door. Vera motioned for Cameron to stay back as she opened the door for Isla. There was no need to startle Isla with Cameron’s presence right off the bat.
Opening the door, Vera’s breath caught in her throat at the sight of Isla. She was wearing a little black dress that Vera was already picturing taking off of her. The diagonal cut of the hem showed off more of her right leg than her left, and Vera had to stop herself from licking her lips at the sight. If Cameron wasn’t a mere ten feet away, Vera had no doubt she’d have pulled Isla inside and led her to the bedroom.
But, alas. That would have to wait.
“You look amazing.”
“So do you,” Isla blushed as she tucked her curly hair behind her ear. “Sorry I’m early. Maggie picked Mason up early, and I didn’t want to sit around the house anymore. I wanted to see you.”
“Never apologize for that.”
Pulling Isla toward her, Vera framed her face with her hands and kissed her. She no longer cared about Cameron’s presence; she had to kiss Isla. Vera felt Isla run her hand up her back, only to pause as she quickly took a step back from Vera.
“Oh, Cameron. Hi.”
“Hey,” Cameron waved, a smirk forming on her lips. “I promise I’m not a creep.”
“She was helping me get ready,” Vera quickly chimed in.
“Because Vera decided her entire closet was useless.”
“I had nothing to wear.”
“So, I took care of her.” Cameron nodded toward Vera. “I think I did good.”
“I’ll say you did.” Isla’s arched eyebrow and smile would undoubtedly be the death of Vera.
Gathering her bag off the small table by the front door, Isla and Vera waved goodbye to Cameron before making their way toward the driveway. Vera hoped Cameron knew to leave as soon as they left, but she made a mental note to make sure of her absence before they arrived back home. Her mind was running wild with thoughts of how the night might end when Isla slowly pushed her against the car and began kissing her.
Every fiber in Vera’s body screamed for more. More of Isla’s mouth on her body. More of Isla’s lips on hers. More of Isla, period.
And it was clear that Isla felt the same way.
After what could have been thirty seconds or thirty minutes, Isla took a step back from Vera. They were both breathless as they smiled at each other.
“Hi.”
“Hi.”
“That’s a preview of what’s after dinner.”
With a wink, Isla reached around Vera’s waist and opened the passenger side door for her. Vera caught another quick kiss before getting into the car. She watched Isla walk around the car and take a moment to catch her breath before getting inside.
The drive to the restaurant at the Moonflower Cove Inn was short, barely a few minutes. Vera had made the reservation for them and requested there be candles on the table for them. She hoped Isla liked it. As Isla parked the car, Vera put her hand on her arm.
“Wait.” Quickly getting out of the car, Vera nearly jogged around it to open the door for Isla. She held her hand out to her, helping her out of the vehicle. Isla’s smile was the brightest light in the night sky, and Vera was enamored by it. Hand in hand, they walked into the restaurant.
“Hello, we have a reservation for two. Forsyth.”
“Yes, of course.” The host looked disgruntled at the sight of them holding hands but they both held firm. Vera knew for things to change, people had to be willing to change them. “Right this way.”
They followed the semi-reluctant host to a table with a view of the mountains just beyond the window. Even with the sunlight below the horizon, the view was still beautiful. But not nearly as beautiful as the one in front of her.
“This is lovely,” Isla commented as she ran her hands over the soft petals of the rose in a vase on the table. “And so are you.”
“Right back at you.”
As they perused their menus, they held hands on the table the entire time. Normally, Vera wasn’t one for public displays of affection. But things were different with Isla; they were comfortable. Easy. She didn’t care who judged them; especially not the older couple a few tables away. Isla and Vera were happy and that was all that mattered.
Isla must have sensed her thoughts, as she squeezed Vera’s hand. “It won’t always be like this.”
They sat their menus down as they looked into each other’s eyes.
“What do you mean?”
“The stares. The silent judging. I know that one day, it’s not going to matter who you love. At least that’s my hope. That’s the world I want Mason to grow up in. One where people don’t judge you simply because you’re holding hands with the most beautiful woman in the world.”
Isla’s words matched the sentiment in Vera’s heart.
“I feel that way, too. But,” she felt the playfulness fill her eyes and smile, “you did get one thing wrong”
“Oh, really?” Isla arched an eyebrow at her. “What’s that?”
“It is I, my dear Isla, that is holding the hand of the most beautiful woman in the world.”
Isla lowered her gaze as she bit her lip, but she couldn’t hide her smile. When she looked back up at Vera, the truth was as plain as day on her face. She was in love, too.
Should I tell her now?
Vera had no time to contemplate as the server came over to take their order. Their conversations shifted to Mason and work and plans for Thanksgiving. The latter had Vera the most excited.
“We will have to celebrate together. We can make all the classic Thanksgiving dishes.”
“I’d love that.”
“Me, too. We can have our own little family dinner. Just the three of us.”
“What about Walker?”
“She’ll be with the Carlsons, as usual.” Vera took a bite of her cheese ravioli and chewed. “I usually volunteer to work the holidays, but I think I’ll make an exception this year. I want to spend it with you and Mason.”
“We would love that. We haven’t had a real Thanksgiving since before Blake…” Isla seemed to be choosing her words carefully, “left.”
Vera could almost feel the pain in Isla’s voice. Although they had talked about Blake before, Vera knew it was never going to be an easy thing for Isla. After all, how do you move from the fact your kid was taken? Forget it was by their dad; that was Isla’s baby. Vera couldn’t imagine that pain.
Pushing her plate aside, Vera reached out and placed a hand on Isla’s arm.
“I can’t possibly know what you are going through, and I know this is all moving quickly, but I meant what I said last night. I am here for you, every step of the way. When everything feels dark and missing Blake physically hurts, I want to be the shoulder you cry on and lean on.”
“Vera…” Isla’s voice quivered.
“I know these overwhelming moments of missing Blake are hard, but I don’t want you to have to go through them alone. And I need you to know it’s okay to find happiness in the darkness. It’s the only way to make it in this crazy world. It doesn’t diminish your love for Blake or your ache to have her back in your life, but it does allow you to feel happiness again. Because you deserve that, Isla. And Mason deserves to know that her mom is okay and happy, despite everything that has gone on in her life. Trust me, she needs that. I know what it’s like to have a mom that is not happy.”
“God, you’re so good with words.” Lifting her hand, Isla wiped a single tear from her eyes. “Thank you for saying all of that. I have been feeling guilty. Moving here, meeting you… it’s all been so wonderful but I can’t help but feel guilty being happy because Blake isn’t here.”
“I know that, sweetie, and if there was anything I could do to help, believe me I would.”
“I know. And thank you.”
Vera gave Isla a moment to feel her feelings before continuing.
“I don’t know about you, but I’m kind of a religious person. I’m not a churchgoer, but I believe there’s a God that loves me and wants the best for me, even if I think I know what that is. And I’ve been praying that one day down the road, you and Blake will be reunited. I pray she understands how hard you fought to keep her in your life and how much pain you experienced because of her absence. But more than anything, I hope and pray she knows how much her mother loves her.”
Isla lowered her gaze as she intertwined her fingers with Vera’s. “Thank you for saying all of that.”
“I mean it, Isla. All of it.” She nodded firmly. “I’m in. I’m all in.”
Isla nodded her head, smiling. “I am, too.”
“Good,” Vera said with a wink. “Because there’s no one else I’d want to split a cheesecake dessert with than you.”
“Thank you, Vera.”
“You don’t have to thank me. This is what girlfriends do.”
“Well, lucky for me, I have the best one.”
“No way. I do.”
Isla chuckled. “We’re really pathetic, aren’t we?”
“Nah,” Vera jokingly waved her off. “We’re in love.”
Everything around Vera seemed to stand still. Had she really just said that? Out loud? To Isla?
Oh, my God. What if it was too soon? What if she’s not feeling that yet? Oh, my God. I hope I didn’t mess this up…
“You got that right,” Isla responded with a wink. Picking up her glass of wine, Isla held it up for a toast. Vera did the same, keeping her glass a few inches away from Isla’s. “To many more nights like this.”
“Hear, hear,” Vera said as their glasses clinked together.