47. epilogue
epilogue
. . .
crew
ONE MONTH LATER
“I’m still not convinced this is a smart idea,” Aspen said warily as she eyed the massive horse in front of her.
“C’mon, little phoenix. Rascal is an old softie, aren’t you buddy?” I cooed, scratching the patch of white between his eyes. He nickered lightly, nipping at my hand with his lips.
Aspen’s gaze narrowed on me. “This is the same horse you fell off that ultimately led to you becoming a drug addict. Forgive me if I don’t exactly trust him.”
“Well you’re going to have to start.”
“We should’ve gone riding before this,” she muttered. “I have no idea what I’m doing.”
“You know how to ride me, right?” I winked when she whirled on me. “The concept is the same. It’s all in the hips.”
“You filthy man.”
“You love me.”
“God knows why.”
“Quit stalling and get that fine ass up there,” I said, placing a hand on the small of her back, nudging her closer to the steps that would get her high enough to swing onto Rascal’s back without my help.
Even I was going to use them, something I hadn’t had to do since I was a kid. I wasn’t completely healed from my ordeal, and as a tradeoff for letting me out of the house today, I had to promise Aspen I’d take it easy where I could.
Plus, my shoulder wasn’t strong enough to hoist me into the saddle without some assistance.
Standing nearby to catch her if she fell or if Rascal got spooked—though I knew he wouldn’t; I was merely humoring her—I kept my hands on Aspen’s hips to steady her as she stuck her left boot into the stirrup, one hand on the pommel and the other on the cantle, exactly as I’d shown her. Momentarily, I was distracted by her ass, the light denim of her cut-off shorts stretched tight across the globes. Her hamstrings popped along the backs of her thighs, her calves tensed above the edges of her ankle-height Lucchese boots. Her arms were bare in her flowy black tank, the sides dipping low enough to tease the side of her boob and the edges of her new tattoo. She’d been working with my artist in Boise to cover her burn scars, and they were about halfway done.
That tantalizing peek got me hard.
My little city girl was going country, and I was as obsessed with her today as I had been the first time I saw her.
“Crew?” she prompted, and I blinked furiously, shaking my head.
With a count to three and a forceful push off her right foot, Aspen swung up and landed softly in the saddle.
Her excited grin was wide and infectious as she looked down at me. “I did it!”
“Of course you did, baby.”
“Your turn,” she said, scooting forward a bit to make room for me.
Getting onto Rascal was all muscle memory for me, even with those muscles screaming from a month of disuse. I groaned as I settled in behind Aspen, who looked over her shoulder at me, eyes bright with worry.
“You okay?”
I wrapped my arms around her to grab the reins, and her back relaxed into my chest.
“Better than,” I assured her. “I’m with you.”
“Charmer,” she teased, an oof leaving her as I kicked Rascal in the side, urging him forward into an easy trot.
Could we have taken the truck or an ATV to reach the spot I wanted to bring Aspen? Of course, and it would’ve been a lot easier on my body. But horseback was the best way to see the ranch, and it had been too long since I’d spent any quality time with Rascal, thanks to the uproar the last few months had caused in my life.
I wanted to feel the wind against my face and the sunshine on my skin. September was right around the corner, and though the days were still hot as hell, the nights had begun to cool considerably, allowing me and Aspen to sleep with the windows open.
A month had passed since the showdown with Kelly Saunders. A month in which I’d essentially been a captive in my own home save for the occasional trips to physical therapy, mental therapy, and the ranch. Aspen and I had settled into a bit of a routine while I convalesced, but I was more than excited to be cleared for work. Hopefully sometime in the next week or so.
With my and Parker’s statements, the Prom Night Arsonist case had officially closed, providing a sense of peace to all the victim’s families. It rankled a number of them that Kelly hadn’t lived to be served justice for her crimes, but I knew Aspen considered her death a fair trade.
In the past four weeks, she’d only left my side for a total of three days, long enough to fly to Denver, pack up her office and apartment, terminate her lease, and ship everything here .
My girl was finally putting down roots—with me.
I grinned remembering the day I asked her to stay.
“What’s this?” she asked.
“A key to my house. Well…our house,” I amended. I could feel my cheeks heating as I stared at her staring at the pristine silver key dangling from the ring looped around my finger.
“Crew…”
“Will you stay?” I asked, my tone borderline begging, which I wasn’t above doing. I’d get on my goddamn knees for this woman—and had, numerous times. “You can go off on your investigations as often as you want, as long as you always come back to me. As long as Dusk Valley is home.”
Aspen shook her head, though she climbed onto my lap to straddle me on the couch. Closing her tiny fist around my hand and the key, she brought them between us and kissed my knuckles.
“Home is you , Crew. Wherever you are, that’s where I want to be.”
Those were the sweetest words I’d ever heard.
After my ordeal, I also encouraged her to contact her parents, reminding her we never knew when our time was up, and how shitty she’d feel if she lost one of them without ever speaking to them again. The conversations were short and stilted at first, but she’d managed to open up to them in a way she hadn’t before, and I think it all went a long way toward repairing the damage done in the wake of Lola’s death.
Therapy had a lot to do with it. Once a week, we drove up to Boise to meet with our respective therapists. Personally, I’d been making incredible strides in dealing with some repressed feelings regarding my addiction, and Aspen had been able to come to terms with the fact that all the bad things that happened to her were not her fault. She’d also started writing a book detailing the case and our part in it all, which she was calling The Shadows of Dusk Valley .
We were healing together, which only made our relationship stronger .
I was about to make the damn thing permanent if she’d have me.
Oh yes, I had an ulterior motive for taking this ride today.
The sun dipped toward the horizon as we crested the final hill, which flattened into a grassy plateau that overlooked the valley. In the distance, town was visible, the water tower jutting up toward the sky. Aspen and I dismounted, and I led Rascal over to a stand of trees, draping his rein over a low-hanging branch and offering him an apple as a thank you for getting us up here safely.
Then I took the basket I’d hooked on the side of the saddle and led Aspen to the center of the field. The country grasses were tall enough to brush Aspen’s knees, mingling and twining in the breeze with vibrant and numerous wildflowers. Setting down the basket, I shook out the blanket I’d tucked through its handles and placed it on the ground.
Aspen sat as I knelt and laid out the spread.
“Crew Lawless, did you have your mama make all this?” she teased once everything was unpacked.
I grinned sheepishly. We both knew I was a more than capable cook, but I wasn’t above asking Mama for help when the need arose. There were sandwiches, a tub of potato salad, crunchy homemade dill pickles kept safe in a jar, and thick slices of Mama’s cheesecake for dessert.
“Maybe.”
Aspen unwrapped the wax paper from one of Mama’s turkey clubs and sniffed, sighing happily before taking a big bite. Around the mouthful of food, she said, “I ain’t mad.”
All I could do was chuckle and shake my head as I settled next to her with my own sandwich. We chatted idly about nothing while we ate, and when we were finished, I cleared up the garbage. Before we tucked into the cheesecake, I withdrew two individual sized bottles of sparkling white grape juice from the basket, handing one to her .
“Fancy,” she giggled.
“It was the best I could do under the circumstances.”
“What are we toasting?” she asked.
I took a moment to study her, to brand this moment into my memory for the rest of my life. I never wanted to forget the way the fading sunlight glowed on her skin, or how the sky behind her head was a gorgeous ombre from pale orange at the horizon to deep purple high above. How brightly her cinnamon eyes shone, glinting with what could only be described as pure happiness and love.
Love for me .
This woman was my entire fucking world.
The scene was something out of a dream, a fantasy miraculously and magically brought to life, which was the only thing that could explain Aspen McKay being here with me.
“We’re toasting to us, my love. We’ve been through hell and back to get here, but there isn’t anyone else I’d rather tackle all life throws at us with than you.”
Aspen grinned, leaning in for a kiss, and I greeted her hungrily.
In deference to my injuries, we also hadn’t had sex in nearly a month, and I was a man starved.
Her hands came up to my shirt, fisting the olive-colored material and dragging me closer as our tongues tangled, our lips sliding together and breaking apart, teasing and taunting, waiting to see which of us would break first.
I’d never get tired of the way she tasted, like love and light, safety and serenity. She was my soft place to land, my partner in crime, my best friend and the love of my life. There wasn’t a damn thing I wouldn’t do for her. Hell, I’d take a fucking bullet or walk headfirst into the flames for her if she asked, and I knew the feeling was mutual.
Reaching up to cup her chin, I pulled back, both of us gasping for breath .
Aspen whined, chasing after me, managing to steal another kiss before I leaned away.
“Why’d you stop?”
“Because I need to ask you something.”
“If the question is do I want to have sex right here, the answer is yes .”
I chuckled. “Different question, but hold onto that response.”
Shifting so I could reach into my front pocket of my jeans, my fingers closed around the tiny piece of jewelry.
“You’ve had that in there this whole time?” she gasped when I presented the ring.
“You’re too sneaky for me to get away with carrying a ring box around,” I grinned.
Aspen damn near knocked me over and she threw herself at me. I caught her around the waist, settling her so she straddled my lap.
“Ask me then!”
“Hold your horses.”
“Technically, that’s your horse,” she said, pointing over my shoulder at Rascal.
“Aspen…” I warned.
“Sorry,” she murmured, though her ear-to-ear grin said she was anything but.
“I’ve known there was something between us from the very first time I laid eyes on you in the fire station. While every day since hasn’t always been easy, they’ve been wonderful and thrilling and so full of joy and love because of you . I can’t imagine living the rest of my life without you by my side. And maybe people will say we’re moving faster than a normal relationship should, but nothing about us or the hell we’ve walked together is normal. And I don’t want it to be, because then it wouldn’t be ours. I love you with every fiber of my being. Everything I have and everything that I am is yours. Until my last breath, you own me. Will you continue to make me the luckiest man alive and marry me?”
The air whooshed out of me as I landed on my back, Aspen’s smiling face hovering above me as she peppered my face with kisses, punctuating each one with a single word.
“ Yes .”