12. Grace
12
GRACE
Tonight has been hell. Not only did we run into Andrew and Sloane again, but Roman was with them, too. Roman was the last person I pleaded with to have Andrew call me after he ghosted me. It was embarrassing as hell to see him again. It also hurts seeing the three of them laughing and having fun. I don’t know why I feel that way. It’s not like I’m still harboring feelings for Andrew. If anything, I don’t even respect him anymore. I don’t want in his life. I guess just seeing the three of them so happy together is like another sign that Andrew and Roman felt I wasn’t good enough all along.
Still, I managed to get through the game and I’m still standing. Ford is trying to convince me to stay the night. I’ve already spoken with Asher and he’s happy. They’re keeping him tonight—not that Ford knew that in advance. Honestly, I’d rather go straight home, but I’m drained and emotionally exhausted. I also know that going home to an empty house won’t be healthy for me right now. So, I know I’m going to agree—despite only being ninety minutes from my house. I’m praying that I sleep and get an early enough start that Andrew and Sloane will be nowhere around tomorrow. Then I’ll go home and break it off with Ford.
I wish things could be different, because I really like Ford. I love spending time with him. Tonight, he held my hand, pulled out my seat and made sure I had something to drink. The man was completely attentive, plus his eyes never wandered— not once. There were women looking at him, too. One kept trying to rub against him at the table while Sloane was rolling the dice. All he did was scoot closer to me, while kissing me on the cheek and putting his arm around me. I’ve never had that. I find I want more—even if it is one night.
“If we stay, I’m going to need a separate bedroom,” I tell him. I may secretly want more, but it’s never going to happen.
“How about we go over and see if we can book a two-bedroom suite, then I’ll order room service, and we can talk over dinner?” he suggests.
I frown. “Ford, that sounds really expensive and I?—”
“You do not worry about money. I am not exactly poor, but with the five g’s that I won thanks to Vector’s old lady at the craps table, we’ll let them pay for the room and the meal. What do you say?”
I sigh. I don’t want to leave. I can be honest and admit that. I enjoy being around him. Plus, I’d like to talk more with him—even knowing I’m going to break things off when we return back to real life. “If you’re sure,” I cautiously agree.
“I’m more than positive,” he says with a big smile. He doesn’t want tonight to end, either. Something about that warms me from the inside out. He puts his hand against my lower back, leading me to the lobby. Before we get there, I hear my name.
“Grace!”
My body stiffens when I hear Andrew. Ford looks down at me with questions in his eyes. It’s the same look that I saw in the elevator earlier. He hasn’t asked how I know Andrew, but I know it’s coming. I turn around slowly and face the man who disappeared from my life when I needed him, but now keeps showing up all the time.
“Andrew,” I respond, forcing a polite mask on my face. It doesn’t escape my attention that Ford’s hand slides from my back to my hip, then his fingers spread over my stomach as his hold on me tightens. There’s something about that move. It seems possessive and I feel a thrill move through me.
Seriously, what the hell is wrong with me?
“Hey, Grace. Hey, Ford.”
“Vector. Where’s your old lady?”
“Sloane? She was beat. She worked and then we drove down here. I think her lucky streak in the casino wore her out.”
“She definitely did good,” Ford responds. “We better go. Grace and I were just about to get settled and order some room service for the night.”
Andrew looks from Ford to me. He scratches behind his ear, his face scrunching up as if he’s trying to figure something out. Then he just sighs. “Grace, I know you don’t owe me a damn thing, but I was wondering if the two of us could talk privately for a minute.”
“Andrew, what was between us was years ago. I don’t really think there’s anything left for us to say.”
“Please?”
“Vector, I don’t think Grace?—”
I put my hand against Ford’s chest. He’s moved so that he’s putting part of his body between me and Andrew. It feels like he’s trying to protect me, and that’s just another thing that makes me really like him. Maybe what I’m feeling about him is different because he’s different. Could there really be a man in my life who wouldn’t look to hurt me the first chance he got?
“It’s okay, I’ll talk to him,” I whisper.
“You sure, sweetheart?” he asks. Maybe it’s my imagination, but I think he’s worried about me. That warmth I feel whenever Ford does something sweet fills me again.
I nod. “Go get us that room. I’ll just be over there by the coffee lounge.”
Ford studies my face. I don’t know what he’s searching for, but he shocks the heck out of me when he leans down and places a kiss on my forehead. “I’ll come get you in a bit.”
I have the strangest urge to cry. I can’t remember anyone ever kissing me like that, making me feel like I’m special to him. Am I being stupid?
“We won’t be long, Ford,” Andrew responds. Something unspoken moves between the two men as they stare at one another. Ford seems reluctant, but finally nods. He kisses the top of my head this time, walking away after winking at me.
I smile, watching as Ford’s lips stretch out to match mine. It could be possible that this man is insane. I shake my head, forcing my attention back to Andrew. I’d rather have my teeth pulled than talk to him. I’m sure he can tell that. I start walking to the table over in the corner of the coffee bar. It’s up to Andrew if he follows or not.
Once I sit down, he takes a seat across from me. “You look good, Grace,” he says, wincing with his words.
I roll my eyes, but I do it while looking down at the table. I don’t want to fight or make him feel sorry for me. I just want this conversation done so I can walk away. He doesn’t have a place in my life anymore. From watching him tonight, I’m not sure I ever had a place in his. I wouldn’t have fit in. Maybe Andrew always knew that and that’s why he kept me away from his club. Of course, he never really gave me a chance to fit either. Ford is the president of an MC, and he doesn’t seem to have qualms about being with me—and he probably should.
“Thanks, Andrew. I’m not sure what you wanted to speak about. I don’t think there’s anything for us to say to one another—not after all this time.”
“I wanted to apologize to you. I was an asshole, and you truly didn’t deserve that.”
“You’re right, I didn’t,” I exhale. I let my gaze move over the man that I once thought I was completely in love with. He has more lines on his face now. You can tell he’s spent hours in the sun and lived hard and fast. I guess you could say the same about me—except for the sun. It is his eyes that are the most different, however. They don’t hold that sparkle of mischief that I always loved. They look older now, wiser. They did sparkle at the table when he was with Sloane. She makes him happy. I know Andrew enough to recognize that instantly.
“Grace—”
On instinct, I reach out to place my hand over his. “Whatever it is you think you owe me, please stop. I’m fine. What we shared was a lifetime ago. I’m divorced with a son. I have my own life, and you are just a memory of my past. Honestly, that’s all we are to one another—the past . I wouldn’t change that, because if I did, I wouldn’t have my son, and he’s my entire world.”
“A son? Fuck, Grace, did you, did I?—”
I feel a chuckle bubble up before I can stop it. “Please, get that terrified look off your face. You’re not my baby daddy.”
For the first time, the surrounding mood lightens. “You deserved better. I shouldn’t have shut you out. I was just … I was a mess, Grace. My head was messed up. I was in pain and fighting to?—”
“There’s a reason they say war is hell, Andrew. You did survive and you seem … happy.”
“I am getting there,” he says. “I have good people around me and Sloane …”
“I’m happy for you,” I reply, wincing because I’m overusing that word happy. I can’t help it. I just want this entire conversation to end so I can leave. He is clueless. The man doesn’t even realize how much he’s hurting me by making it clear that he didn’t want me to be one of those good people around him while he healed. If I needed a clearer picture of exactly how little Andrew thought of me, I have it now.
“You’re being nicer to me than I deserve after refusing to accept your letters or your calls, Grace.”
“I won’t say you didn’t hurt me. At the time, I felt like my world was ending. I was desperate to find out if you were okay. I wanted to be by your side. After speaking with your father,” I shrug. “It was clear I didn’t really fit into your world, Andrew.”
“Shit,” he hisses.
“I think we can agree your father is a piece of work.”
“He was a fucking asshole,” Andrew grumbles.
“Yeah, I picked up on that.” I frown, looking around me as a chill slithers down my back.
“You, okay?”
“Yeah, it’s just, um, do you ever get a feeling like you’re being watched?” I ask, looking around behind me. When you live the life I have, you have a sixth sense about someone watching you or danger. That’s exactly what I’m feeling. I continue looking around, but I don’t see anything out of the ordinary. Maybe seeing Andrew after all this time is leaving me even more unsettled than I thought.
“It’s probably Ford,” Andrew laughs, motioning over at the man in question who is heading our way. I didn’t even look toward the lobby, which I should have. It stands to reason Ford was looking for me. In the short time I’ve known him, it’s clear that he can be very intense and possessive. Oddly enough, those traits seem to put me at ease, maybe because he doesn’t back them up with anger, but only gentleness.
“I guess it could be.”
“For what it’s worth, Ford’s a good guy. You can trust him. He’s a straight shooter. It’s kind of funny, actually. I’ve known him for a while. I’ve never seen him with a woman.”
“Grace isn’t just any woman,” Ford responds for me, coming up behind me, placing his hands possessively on my shoulders.
“You don’t have to tell me that. I’ve known that a long time. Tonight just cemented that fact. I’m going to go join Roman and Cowboy. You two have a good night. Grace, if you ever need anything, I hope you know that you just have to ask,” Andrew adds.
“If she needs anything, she has me,” Ford rumbles and for the first time since I met him, he sounds pissed.
“Fair enough,” Andrew responds, not bothering to hide his smile.
“You ready to go up to our room, sweetheart?” Ford asks me.
“If that offer includes the room service you promised, then absolutely.”
“Already ordered.”
I raise an eyebrow. “I didn’t tell you what I wanted.”
“Nope, but you’ll like what I got,” he quips, and I snort. Ford doesn’t lack having an ego. That much is for damn sure.
“Goodnight, you two.”
“See ya’ around, Vector.”
“Bye,” I murmur, letting Ford lead me upstairs, praying I never see Andrew again.