Chapter 14
FOURTEEN
Nicky
I was pissed and I had no right to be.
Noah not giving in, grated on my nerves.
Something changed in him. He’d clearly had enough, like he had said.
I wanted to call his bluff but when he left my hotel room after I fell asleep, he was obviously done.
With me. With us? I wasn’t sure but we had to sort this shit out before I left town.
No. Fuck that. I wasn’t leaving. I could do my job anywhere and I was going to plant my ass in his apartment and work from there.
Whether he liked it or not, Noah and I were going to be together. Forever.
When I arrived at the restaurant that Noah was at, I saw Veronica sitting at a table by herself. She was eating a salad and looking out the window every so often. When her eyes flicked to mine, a slow grin spread on her face. She placed her fork down and sat back, crossing her arms under her chest.
I glanced at the place setting across from her. It had been cleaned up, so it didn’t look like Noah had been here at all.
“Where is he?” I demanded, not caring in the least that it came off rude.
“He left.” She lifted her chin defiantly.
“I can see that.” My hands clenched into fists at my sides, a tremor of hot energy rushing down my spine. I needed to get it together. “Tell me where he is.”
“Why? So you can break his heart again?”
“I…” I shook my head. “I did no such thing.”
“No? Are you sure?”
“You think you know us. Trust me, baby girl, one night with us fucking every single one of your holes means shit.” A few gasps sounded around us, but I didn’t care. “No one knows Noah like I do. And he’s the only one who knows me.” I pointed at myself. “Only him.”
“Then you need to tell him that, Nicky.” She sat forward, clearly unaffected by my little outburst. “You need to tell him that you’re in love with him because you obviously are.”
“I tried that,” I said softly, my shoulders slumping with defeat.
“You tried telling him at the wrong time.” She pointed to the empty chair across from her. “Sit.”
“I need to find him,” I argued.
“I know, but you need to sit down and cool off first because if you go find him with how you’re feeling right now, it won’t be good for either of you.”
I opened my mouth to argue but thought better of it and sat across from her. Maybe she was right.
“Take a deep breath,” she ordered.
I raised an eyebrow, staring at her.
She sighed, rolling her eyes. “Just do it please.”
“Fine.” I did as she told me and breathed in deep, letting it out slowly.
“Again.”
I did it a few more times before she was satisfied.
“Better?”
The anger rushing through me was no longer there. I was still annoyed but not as bad as a few moments ago. “Surprisingly, yes.”
“Good.” Veronica went back to eating her salad. “My son has a temper thanks to his father, so whenever he gets overwhelmed with his emotions, I wrap him in my arms and tell him to breathe. Doesn’t work every time of course because it isn’t foolproof, but it does help settle him a bit.”
“I can see why. Although, you didn’t put your arms around me,” I pointed out.
She laughed. “Yeah, that’s true but I don’t think it’s my arms you need around you, Nicky.”
She was right. Again.
“Do I have permission to leave now?”
“You going to behave and not yell and scream at Noah before you get the answers you’re looking for?”
“I…” I was taken aback. “I would never scream at him. Yes, I’ve yelled before but that’s because he frustrates the fuck out of me.” And I wouldn’t want to change it at all.
“I could go on and tell you how much you’re in love with him, but I think you’re already realizing that on your own.” She waved her hand between us. “So, go. Find him and tell him how you feel.”
I jumped from the chair and went to rush out of the restaurant, but turned around instead. “Thank you. For everything.”
“You’re welcome.” Her smile widened. “Now go!”
Spinning on my heel, I all but ran out of the restaurant and nearly took someone out in the process. I didn’t know where Noah was, so I would try his bar first.
When I arrived at Coffee Beans & Love, I almost jumped out of my car before I put it into park. I was sure my parking job was shit but at the moment, I didn’t care.
I played out in my head what I would say to Noah and how I expected him to respond. Not that it helped. It actually made my racing heart pound inside my chest even more. By the time I was through the front doors of the bar, all I could hear was my heartbeat thumping in my ears.
“Nicky.” Presley waved a hand in front of my face. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
I shook my head, not even seeing him standing there at first. “Where’s Noah?”
“He’s in the back.” Presley frowned. “What’s going on with you? I’ve never seen you like this before.”
“I don’t have time to explain.” I went to walk past him when he caught my arm.
“I love you but please don’t hurt him.”
“I don’t intend on it.” Not again. Never. Again.
I tried keeping my cool but the closer I got to seeing Noah, the more I was ready to lose my damn mind.
I couldn’t control this sudden urge to have him in my arms and in my bed for the rest of my life.
Why? Why now and not before? Why did I lead him on and let him think I was fucking others when I wasn’t?
I was stupid as hell because if I let him go, there was no way I would ever find someone who came even remotely close to being like Noah.
When I reached the kitchen, a deep laugh made a tingle shoot right down the length of my dick. That laugh should have been because of me. His smiles, his laughs, his fucking world, should be mine.
As I stepped through the swinging door that led to the back of the bar, I bumped into one of the staff.
She muttered a sorry and rushed past me, but it didn’t stop me from knocking a metal bowl off the table to my left.
Noah’s head lifted, his eyes widening when he saw me standing there. “Nicky? What are you doing here?”
“We need to talk.” My eyes flicked to Brady, one of the other owners of this place. “Now.”
“I know that tone.” Brady clapped Noah’s shoulder. “Good luck.” He came up to me and pointed a finger in my face. “You be nice.”
If it wasn’t bad form, I would have grabbed his finger and broken it but I actually liked the guy, so I refrained.
“Nicky.” Noah went back to wiping down one of the coffee machines. It was something fancy that I could never get the hang of using. Just give me a regular old coffee machine and I was happy. “What are you doing here?” he asked me again.
“I need to talk to you.” I closed the distance between us, careful not to touch him because I knew that if I did, this wouldn’t end how I intended.
Sex was not on the table at this moment.
I had to get these words out now or I feared that I would never get them out.
I walked past him and headed to the door that led to the back alley behind the bar.
“I’m working, Nicky.” Something flashed in his eyes. He was curious.
“Yeah, I see that, but this is important.” I headed out the back door, praying with every single inch of me that he would follow. I had no idea what to say to him, but I needed to say something. Anything. He had to know how I felt, even though I didn’t really know what those feelings were.
Thankfully, Noah followed but he had a deep scowl on his face. “I don’t have time for this.”
“I’m in love with you,” I blurted. Okay, so we were just going to lay it all out in the open from the very beginning.
Noah’s eyes widened.
“I know you didn’t want to hear it before and that you thought I was just going to say those words because you did, but I promise that’s not the case.
I am so fucking in love with you, it scares the shit out of me.
” I ran a hand through my hair, trying to control the urge to go up to him and pull him into my arms.
“Why?”
I stared at him, unsure as to what he meant by that.
“Why after all of this time?” He took a step toward me, his eyes flicking back and forth over my face. “You never told me that you weren’t sleeping with anyone else. Why would you do that, Nicky? Why wouldn’t you tell me?”
“Because I was scared,” I confessed. “I’m still scared.
These feelings…” I rubbed the spot in the middle of my chest. “It’s heavy.
I can feel them sitting on me. I just…I’m sorry.
I truly am. I know I should have told you right away that I wasn’t fucking anyone else.
I do know that. I’ll never forgive myself for that shit. ”
“You broke my heart,” Noah said softly, his eyes flashing with anger. “I would have been better off thinking you were fucking other people.”
“How can I ever get you to forgive me?” That weight on my chest increased.
Noah crossed his arms in front of him. “I don’t know but you can’t tell me you love me, apologize, and then expect me to forget.
It may not be a big deal to others, but it is to me.
I didn’t want you to fuck anyone else. Ever.
But I also didn’t want to lose any chance I had at being with you. Even if it was just casual.”
“Noah.” My heart pounded in my ears. He was going to end this. For good. I had to do something. I had to earn his forgiveness, but I had no idea how the hell I could do that. Before I knew what I was doing, I dropped to my knees.