Chapter 16
Reshma
Reshma placed her napkin on her empty plate and let out a soft sigh of contentment.
If a week ago, someone had told her that she’d be looking over the beach with her husband, as the sun set while they had dinner at an Italian restaurant because he’d discovered that Italian food was her favourite, she’d have checked their temperature and asked them if they needed a doctor.
Yet, here she was.
With each inhale and exhale of ocean-scented air, Reshma felt another small piece of her tension from the past ten days wash away and a sense of peace take its place.
She couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt so …
relaxed and at ease. That wasn’t to say that every aspect of her life had fallen into perfect place.
It hadn’t, but things were certainly looking up and she felt happier than she had in a while.
Unfortunately, the situation with her father was more fraught than ever after Zafar’s confrontation with him, though she’d been on the receiving end of a few acknowledging nods from him whenever she’d seen him.
She didn’t have a great deal of hope that things would miraculously be perfect between them, she wasn’t that naive.
But she would have liked … Her sigh this time was tinged with sadness, some of her earlier happiness dimming.
Maybe she was naive after all. She didn’t expect him to start treating her like he did his other children, but some connection would have been nice, she supposed.
On the upside, however, things with Zafar were looking …
well, up. Reshma smiled at her own thoughts.
She felt giddy thinking about it even now, but today had been incredible.
It had been one surprise after another and she had loved each and every one of them.
Firstly, his idea to go to the animal sanctuary and then to include her cousins when he could have easily let it be just the two of them.
It would have given them a chance to spend some time with each other without anyone else around, but he’d involved her cousins knowing it would make her happy, and it had. Very much so.
Spending time with him, talking to him as though they were a regular married couple having a chat had been such a novel experience for her, too.
And to top it off, he’d booked a table at a nearby restaurant and this time, it was just the two of them.
The restaurant was on the beach and with their table on a deck under an awning, the soothing sound of the waves in the background, and sumptuous Italian food, Reshma had felt like she was dreaming.
Because that was what the day had felt like, something out of a dream.
They’d watched the sunset as they ate, conversation flowing easily from one topic to another.
They spoke about his work, her work, the trip so far and then the conversation moved onto family, except this time rather than discuss her family dynamics, they’d spoken of his.
They’d finished their meal and the waiter cleared their plates and took their order for tiramisu and coffee.
Zafar leaned back in his chair, looking relaxed and handsome as he watched the waves.
The setting sun cast a golden glow over him and he looked like he belonged on a magazine cover sitting there.
His hair looked lighter, as did his eyes.
The stark white of his linen shirt contrasted against his sun-kissed skin and Reshma watched him intently as he swallowed, his Adam’s apple moving with the motion, drawing her attention to it and the exposed skin beneath it at the top of his chest.
The waiter snapped her out of her intense focus on him as he placed their items on the table and left.
Zafar leaned forward, adding sugar to his coffee and stirring it gently.
She zeroed in on the movement, his wrist rotating the spoon rhythmically, almost hypnotically.
He pulled the spoon out of the coffee, set it in the saucer and then lifted the cup to his lips, Reshma following each and every movement of his as though she was under a spell.
The cup paused in its tilt as Zafar rested it against his lips and when she looked at his face, he was staring back at her, one eyebrow raised a fraction.
She immediately looked down and loaded her fork with a huge bite of tiramisu and put it into her mouth, eliciting a rumbling laugh from Zafar which warmed her in ways that were completely new to her and making her smile. Well, as much as she could with her mouth full.
‘I meant to ask you.’ She swallowed her mouthful and tried to get conversation back on track after her little moment . ‘When was the last time you were here in Mombasa? Or Kenya for that matter? Daadi said you holidayed here often as a child.’
‘We did. We used to come out here every couple of years, but once we were mostly teenagers, the frequency reduced. And the last time I was here was six years ago for my cousin Safiya’s wedding, though, sadly, it wasn’t a happy time for us, because soon after that, our family fell apart.’
Reshma knew of Zafar’s cousin Safiya, but no one ever spoke about her and she’d never braved asking anyone about her either. She could hear the sorrow and pain in Zafar’s voice crystal clear.
He stared at his cup, his mind seeming miles away, and Reshma placed her hand on his arm and gently squeezed it. ‘You don’t have to talk about it if it upsets you, Zafar. I wouldn’t want that.’
He smiled as he moved his arm and held her hand in his own, squeezing it before letting go. ‘I’d like to, if you’re up for it? I have to warn you though, it’s a long story and doesn’t make for pleasant listening.’
She answered his smile with one of her own. ‘I’m listening.’
He took a deep breath and then told her about their family dynamic when he’d been younger.
‘My grandfather was a traditionalist and had very firm ideas about what he considered to be right and wrong. The margin of grey between the two was very small. My mum was his choice of daughter-in-law so he considered her “right”. My aunt – his younger son’s wife, that is – was my uncle’s choice and so my grandfather never made a secret of his disapproval, though Daadi was more accepting.
Personally, I could never understand why he was against the match.
They seemed happy with each other. Anyway, my uncle’s son, Qais, was born a year before I was and while everyone was happy at his birth, it was nothing compared to the celebration when I was born.
In my grandfather’s eyes, his true heir had been born.
Not only was I a son, I was his eldest son and chosen daughter-in-law’s child.
And when my aunt then had a daughter while my mother gave birth to another four sons, you can imagine my grandfather’s different responses to them. ’
Reshma could imagine all too well, sadly. It didn’t seem to matter what century they lived in, some people would always celebrate the birth of a son more than that of a daughter and Zafar’s grandfather had been of that ilk.
‘Anyway, when we were kids, we didn’t realise anything was different as such.
We all got on with playing and going to school and just being children, but my grandfather always treated us differently.
He treated me really well, while he treated the others, especially Qais and Safiya, with less affection.
In his eyes, I was the heir, I could do no wrong and anyone who tried to say anything to me would face his wrath, which meant I got off scot-free on many an occasion. Everyone was scared of him.’
‘That’s dreadful.’ Her mind went to her own father and the difference in his approach to her and his other children.
‘I can’t understand how people can treat children so differently.
I know people have favourites, but to treat children like that is so …
unpleasant.’ She would have used stronger language, but she was mindful that they were speaking about his grandfather. The word abhorrent felt more apt.
‘You can say that again. To be fair, it was only him that did that. No one else was as divisive. As for me, I made sure I always did what he would want or expect me to do. Any praise from him made my day and when it came to him, I didn’t even listen to my parents.
For me, my grandfather’s word was the law.
I chose my subjects at school with him, any extra-curricular activities had his approval and if I wasn’t at school or with my brothers, I could be found with him.
‘As I got older though, I saw his divisive behaviour for what it was. I couldn’t understand why he didn’t give Qais the time of day as his eldest grandson and treated me as though I was the eldest. There was no question that I was his favourite.
Big clue in the name.’ He laughed, but the sound held no mirth.
Of course . He was named after his grandfather – Zafar Saeed II.
The things he was telling her had Reshma gaping in disbelief.
If someone else had told her this story about Zafar’s family, she wouldn’t have believed them in a million years.
Even now, she found it hard to believe. The fact that a man could behave like that and then actually get away with that behaviour.
But then she thought of her own father and the way he had behaved and decided that it was entirely possible.
As he spoke, Zafar sounded bitter and resentful, two emotions she would never have associated with him.
There was a coldness about him which she hadn’t encountered before and it was unsettling.
But she wouldn’t stop him, she could sense there was more he had to say.
Reshma wondered if Zafar had ever said these words out loud.
Probably not. Who would he have shared them with?
Later, she would wonder at the fact that he felt able to tell her.