Chapter 20 #2
“Yes. I’m not even sure what she did or how she did it, but she spoke to lawyers and then came and spoke to me. She didn’t
feel it was right that he’d left you with no support, and nor did she want to hold on to a hotel that she would associate
with his infidelity. She wanted a fresh start. And she warned me that the hotel was something of a poisoned chalice because
it wasn’t doing well, but I didn’t care about that. I knew I could turn it around.”
Abby was silent for a moment, absorbing that new piece of information.
“I can’t believe she did that—”
“It was unbelievably generous. She was generous. She had every right to punish me and turn away, but she didn’t. She gave me a helping hand, and I never forgot
that.”
Abby swallowed the lump in her throat. “Did you stay in touch?”
“No.” Her mother gave a humourless laugh. “She didn’t want the reminders. And I wouldn’t have wanted them, either.”
“Did she have children herself?”
“No. They’d decided together that they didn’t want children, which also explained why he panicked. Anyway, last thing I heard—which
was many years ago—she’d moved to Australia. I hope she built a good life for herself. She deserved that.”
Abby sat for a moment, absorbing this information.
As a child, she’d occasionally imagined wistfully how it might have been to have her father in her life, but the scenarios she’d conjured in her young brain all had a fairy-tale quality to them.
Her father teaching her to ride a bike. Her father cheering her on in a swimming competition or listening intently as she played the piano.
It was funny how when you yearned for something, you assumed you’d get the best possible version. Be careful what you wish for.
Abby was silent for a moment, digesting the enormity of it and trying to put herself in her mother’s shoes. “Who was with
you when I was born?”
“I was alone, but I had a kind midwife.”
Picturing it, Abby felt her eyes sting. She thought she knew something about loneliness but her experience paled into insignificance
compared with her mother’s. Her heart ached for her, but at the same time she felt a flicker of awe and admiration.
“I can’t bear to think about you dealing with all that by yourself. It breaks my heart.”
Her mother smiled. “I wasn’t by myself. I had you, and you were everything. I didn’t need anyone else. I’d learned by then
that I was better on my own. Life was more stable. Both the men in my life had proved unreliable. I knew I had to learn to
rely on myself. For my sake, but also for yours. I was the only person I trusted to build a life for the two of us. In those
early days I learned to be my own best friend. No one knew me better than I did. No one knew what I needed better than I did.
And yes, those early years were hard because I was trying to care for you and turn the hotel around, but they were also surprisingly
happy—again, mostly because of you.”
“But I must have been an extra burden for you at a time when you were trying to make the hotel work.”
Her mother let go of her hand and shifted so that she could look at her.
“You were a joy. Right from the moment you were born. You gave me purpose, but more than that you made me happy. And it reminded me of the early years of my own childhood, and it made me determined that you would never, ever feel the same rejection I’d felt. That drove everything I did.”
And it had driven the way she’d chosen to parent her only child. Abby saw it clearly now. Her mother’s seemingly impossibly
high expectations had come from a fierce desire to do her best for her daughter. To give her the tools to deal with adversity.
To prepare her for the world. And her reluctance to talk about the past, which had frustrated Abby on many occasions, had
also come from a desire to shield her daughter.
Abby felt a warmth spread through her. Her mother, who had been hurt badly herself, had been determined to protect her. “You’re
a wonderful mother. I’m lucky.”
“In some ways you are lucky, and in other ways you’re not. But that’s true of life in general, I suppose.”
“How did you do it?” She blurted out the words. “Through all that loneliness, hurt and disappointment. How did you keep going?”
“Because the alternative to keeping going is giving up, and I’m not the giving up type. Also, I had you.” Her mother lifted
her hand and stroked Abby’s cheek. “I love you very much. I don’t tell you often enough, but I hope you know.”
She’d never seen her mother this way before. She’d never guessed how much was going on beneath the surface. How much she’d
had to deal with. How had she managed it all? How had she built the life she’d built from the rubble of her past?
Abby’s eyes filled and tears spilled down her cheeks. “I love you, too. And I’m pleased you’re here now, and that you’ve told
me everything.”
Her mother let her hand drop.
“Not quite everything. In one of your phone calls you asked me about Edward. You noticed that the dates of his employment were wrong.”
“You know each other.” It confirmed what she already suspected. “I saw that the moment he walked into the room and dealt with
the weasel.”
“The weasel?”
“That’s what Evie calls him.”
Her mother smiled. “Evie is remarkably perceptive. It’s a perfect description.”
“Edward was protective.” She trod carefully. She didn’t want her mother to talk about anything she didn’t want to talk about,
but at the same time she was enjoying this new connection. For the first time she had a glimpse of the person, and not just
the successful businesswoman.
“Yes. We were friends. The hotel had been mine for two years when Edward applied for the role of concierge. He’d lost his
wife and had a newborn. He needed someone to give him a break, and I was able to do that. He brought the baby to work when
he needed to and your nanny cared for both of you. It helped him get back on his feet.”
“The baby?” Abby frowned. “You mean Evie?”
“Yes, Evie. You’ve known her longer than you think. You treated her like a little sister. You missed her when we moved to
Boston. It took a while for you to forget. I felt guilty about that.”
Evie.
“That day in the boardroom, when you were staring at one page of the report. I couldn’t work out what had caught your attention.
Was it Edward?” Things fell into place. Things that hadn’t made sense, now made sense.
“Yes. It gave me a jolt to see his name there after all these years. I stayed away, you see. I thought it was easier that
way.”
Easier? Abby was increasingly convinced that they’d had a relationship. She was dying to ask but it didn’t feel appropriate. No doubt her mother would tell her if and when she wanted to.
“You never did intend to sell the place, did you?”
“No. This place saved me. I would never sell it.”
Abby was confused. “So why did you send me here? I never really understood that.”
There was a long silence.
“You were the only person I could send.” Her mother turned to look back across the ocean. “I didn’t want to come here myself, and I didn’t trust Jack—he’s gone
by the way—so you were the obvious person. You’ve always had a gift for getting straight to the heart of what is wrong with
a hotel, and what it needs. Your reports were helpful. Astute. It has been interesting reading them.”
“I was a little overenthusiastic in the most recent ones. You prefer facts, I know.”
“Your reports were illuminating.” There was a pause. “You seem to have enjoyed yourself.”
“They’re wonderful people.” Abby stopped herself. “I mean, they’re good at their jobs and they create a warm and welcoming
guest experience that—”
“Abby—” Her mother stopped her. “I agree they’re wonderful people.”
“Right. Good. But you should also know that Evie is a brilliant manager. She has all the right qualities to be running the
hotel. I don’t know what is happening with Gerald, but we should consider making her position permanent.”
Her mother looked at her. “I was thinking that—”
“I mean it, Mom.” The words rushed out of her. “I feel it really strongly. I know she’s young and not hugely experienced,
but she’s brilliant. An asset to the hotel and to the business.”
“I think that maybe—”
“She was the one who appointed Luca, and he has transformed the dining experience. Then there’s—”
“Abby!” Her mother’s voice held a note of frustration and Abby immediately stopped talking.
But then she saw that her mother was smiling.
Her mother never smiled in conversations about the business.
“Sorry.”
“If you give me time to speak, I’m trying to tell you that I agree with everything you’re saying. Evie is excellent, and I’ve
made a point in my life never to waste talent. I will be talking to her.”
“Oh. Good.” Abby frowned as her mother’s words caught up with her. “Wait—did you say Jack had gone? You fired him?”
“I didn’t need to. Fortunately, he made the decision himself. I suspect he’ll be moving to Scotland. Either way that chapter
is closed.”
Abby wasn’t sorry to hear it.
But the position would need to be filled, and she thought about that for a moment. “We need someone good to take over,” she
said. “Someone who can genuinely offer support where it’s needed.”
“I agree.” Her mother paused. “Perhaps it’s something we can talk about in more detail at some point. I value your opinion.
You’re an excellent judge of people.”
Her mother praised sparingly, but that made it all the more precious when it happened.
Abby hugged the feeling close. “So what happens now?” She looked at her mother. “How long will you stay?”
“As long as I feel it’s necessary to be here.”
Abby wondered what that meant for her.
She’d expected to be here for the whole summer. Her brief had been to learn what she could about the hotel while under-cover and she’d done that. Her job was done, wasn’t it? So now what? She hadn’t anticipated leaving this place so soon.
She thought of her evenings spent with Evie. Running along the coast path. Eating supper in her pretty garden. The laughs
she shared with her colleagues. Playing the piano in the pub. And she thought about Tristan—
There was a hollow feeling inside her. A strange ache she couldn’t quite identify.
She wanted to say something to her mother, but what could she say?
Her mother’s focus was the business, and Abby was her successor. The next thing on their list was to replace Jack. Then there
would be something else, and something else—
“I love it here,” she said quietly, and her mother smiled.
“Even as a child, you used to love the beach. We used to build sandcastles together.”
“I wish I could remember that.” Abby pondered. “Did I ever go to a party with balloons? I had this weird flashback when we
were setting up for a party and I didn’t understand it, but now I’m wondering.”
“It could have been your fourth birthday party. The staff filled the place with balloons for you. It was a few weeks before
we moved to Boston.”
It was odd to think she had ties to the hotel that went right back to childhood. Were those ties the reason she was feeling
disappointment at the thought of going back to her old life?
No. She knew it was more complicated than that.
“I’m tired,” her mother said. “I hate admitting it, but I really am tired.”
“After all that stress and emotion it’s hardly surprising. You need to sleep.” Abby stood up. “I’ll take you back to the hotel.”
Her mother stood up, too. “You need to get back to work. You’re needed there and it isn’t fair on Evie that I’ve taken you away.”
“We can have dinner later? We can eat in the restaurant if you like.”
“Not tonight. I have paperwork to catch up on, and there’s something I need to do. I hope you’re not offended.”
“Of course not.” She hesitated. Normally at this point she would back off and respect her mother’s wish for privacy, but the
last few hours had changed everything. “I know you keep saying that you’re fine, but this is a lot to deal with. Telling me
must have been hard. I want you to know that you can talk to me, anytime. About anything.” She held her breath, nervous of
the reaction her words might elicit, but her mother’s expression softened.
“Thank you.”
“I’m serious. You’ve protected me all your life, but I’m an adult now. You don’t need to protect me anymore. These are such
deeply personal things there probably aren’t many people you can share your feelings with. I want you to know that you can
share them with me.” She saw her mother’s eyes glisten.
“I’ll remember that.” Her mother took her hand. “I’m not the only one who has had an emotional day. You have, too. Are you
sure you’re all right?”
Her mother rarely asked her that, but in the last few hours it felt as if their whole relationship had shifted.
“Yes, I am. I’m glad I know it all.” And she needed to process it. Was it wrong that she felt a little relieved that her mother
wanted to be by herself this evening? It would give Abby the space she needed to think through everything that had happened.
A chance to get her head around the fact she’d be leaving Cornwall soon.
Instead of returning to the harbour, they took the footpath that led across the fields to the hotel.
Abby glanced at her mother. There was something softer about her. Something different.
“Are you sure you’ll be okay this evening?”
“Definitely.” They’d reached the hotel and she surprised Abby by stepping forward and giving her a hug. In public.
Abby hugged her back, her throat thickening. “I love you, Mom.”
“I love you, too. You’ve been the most important thing in my life since the moment you were born. Anyway, that’s more than
enough sentiment for one day. It’s emotionally exhausting and I’m out of practice.” Her mother stepped back but there was
a sparkle in her eyes. “If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to take a proper look at my first hotel. It has been a while.”
“Of course. Call if you need me.”
Abby watched as her mother walked away from her and was surprised again when she turned and gave a small wave.
It had been an emotional day, that was true, but it was worth it to feel this new level of connection with her mother.