Excerpt from Slip and Slide
Prologue
“I’m sorry, sir.
But you want us to do what?”
Thayne Wolfe’s voice rose just a tiny bit as he and his partner, Jarrett Evans, blinked at their boss, SAC Lloyd Stanger, the head of the ATF’s Los Angeles field office.
They were gathered around the large oval table in their conference room along with the four other members in their work group, Sarah Connor, also known as The Terminator, her partner, Tim Darcy, Jose Galvez, and his rookie partner, Craig Baldwin.
Craig was a former Marine like Evans and the two men had graduated their Special Agent Basic Training in Georgia together a few months before.
“I said, this weekend you and your partners will be teaming up with an outside group for a lesson in team building.
You will each be expected to complete a group task and then I will be judging the winner.”
Thayne glanced over at his partner.
Jarrett was wearing a nicely-tailored suit, the likes of which Thayne knew he hated even though he looked exceptionally trim and handsome in it.
Jarrett wasn’t really a suit-type individual.
He’d spent the majority of his career—prior to joining the ATF—lying on his belly and watching a target through a sniper scope while in the Marine Corps.
Thayne still found that image to be incredibly sexy.
After all, it wasn’t every man who could say he had a partner and lover as hot as Thayne had.
The man could certainly fill out a suit—as well as camouflage—in all the right places.
Jarrett seemed to be ignoring SAC Stanger at the moment, holding a rubber band stretched between his thumb and forefinger and snapping it with the fingers of his other hand every so often as he sprawled in his chair.
His right leg was also bouncing in a nearly frantic kinetic display, which was the only thing that gave away his need to be up and active.
Thayne knew his partner had an incredibly hard time sitting still, demonstrated in part by how he hated doing desk work.
Writing reports made the man nearly insane.
All of this just made it more difficult for Thayne to understand how Jarrett had been able to complete a twenty-year career as a Marine Corps sniper when he was required to sit still for up to seventy-two hours at a time, watching his target.
“Team building?”
Thayne asked, horrified.
He glanced around the other members of his work group.
“When did this become a thing?”
“That’s right,”
Tim Darcy drawled, “You’ve missed out on the team building exercises the last two years because you were undercover.”
“Lucky bastard,”
Jose grumbled.
“That will be quite enough bitching,”
SAC Stanger growled.
“You’ll complete your day of team building or you won’t be allowed back out in the field.”
Thayne watched Jarrett suddenly sit straight up, curling his fist around the rubber band.
“You mean like we’d have to do desk work forever?”
His deep voice rose in pitch.
“Forever and ever, Cinderella,”
Stanger groused.
“And yes, I know how much you like your field time, Evans.
I bet you think I’m unaware of how much desk work you try to pawn off on your long-suffering partner, but you won’t be getting out of this one so easy.”
“Dammit,”
Jarrett swore quietly behind his hand.
Jarrett glanced at Thayne and briefly narrowed his eyes before turning comically large puppy eyes on Stanger.
“I have no idea what you could mean.”
Sarah snorted from beside Tim who just rolled his eyes.
Jose started swearing under his breath in Spanish, and the fresh-faced Craig just grinned.
“So, tell me about this latest team-building exercise,”
Sarah said, expertly deflecting attention away from Jarrett for the moment.
“Bullshit,”
Jarrett coughed into his hand and Stanger opened his mouth to object.
In an effort to head off the boss’s next comment, Thayne spoke up quickly to keep Jarrett from being skewered again.
“So… this team building means I have to work with my partner to accomplish something and then you judge us to see which team did the best?”
Stanger frowned at him.
“That’s what I just said.
I am the boss so I decide who wins.
Are you all so very deaf?”
“No, sir,”
they all answered.
“Good.
Well then, one of the objectives in the team building exercise is to have you learn to work with partners other than your own.”
SAC Stanger turned to look directly at Thayne.
“For example, you, Wolfe.
Someday, your partner may decide to kill himself by jumping off a building, getting blown up, or rolling off a mountain on a Harley… so you will have to learn how to work with another teammate.”
He held up his hand as Jarrett opened his mouth to object, turning to glare at him.
“What did I say about I am the boss that you didn’t understand?”
“Nothing, sir,”
they said in unison.
“Good.
Then, I am pairing Wolfe with Darcy, Connor with Baldwin, and…”
he looked over at Jose.
“I’m sorry, but I’m partnering you with Evans.”
“Hey!”
Jarrett said, taking objection.
Thayne couldn’t help but chuckle at his partner’s clear indignation.
Jose came to Jarrett’s defense as he lifted his fist and bumped it with Evans’s.
“No sweat, man.
We’re gonna crush the rest of you.”
Thayne watched Jarrett smirk as he fist-bumped Jose right back.
His lover’s deep dimples were gorgeous and Thayne was momentarily stunned.
“I’m expecting that all of you will… crush it,”
Stanger said.
“Now, I want you to meet your helpers.”
“Helpers?”
Thayne asked.
“Yes.
I did mention that you and your partners will be working with an outside group to accomplish your goal.”
“What is our objective, sir?”
Craig Baldwin asked, sounding exactly like the Marine he was.
“You and your partner will be pairing with a troupe of Bluebirds and completing a team building project which will show your patriotism.
This project can be anything that exhibits the very best of our country.”
“You want us to work with blue birds?”
Jarrett asked.
He seemed to ponder the idea for a few moments and then began to nod.
He opened his mouth and closed it twice.
“Does chicken count as a bird because I love fried chicken.
It’s as American as apple pie.
You can’t get much more patriotic than fried chicken and frankly, I don’t know what there is to be blue about.”
SAC Stanger stared at Jarrett as if he had two heads and Sarah leaned forward, pitching her voice low.
“Evans, ‘Bluebirds’ are not depressed chickens.”
Thayne snorted.
“They’re like Girl Scouts but younger, Evans.”
“What?”
Jarrett shot out of his chair.
“That’s even worse.”
“Cool your jets, Evans, and sit the hell down,”
Stanger growled.
He stood up before anyone else could put their foot in their mouth, walking to the door and sticking his head out as Jarrett sat down and slumped.
“Carolyn!”
he bellowed at his secretary.
“Please send in the Bluebirds.”
“Yes, sir!”
“I don’t understand,”
Jarrett hissed quietly, leaning forward as he whispered to Thayne.
“Please don’t tell me you don’t know what a Girl Scout is,”
Thayne whispered back.
Jarrett frowned deeply at Thayne and snorted loudly.
“Of course I know what a…”
He was interrupted when six small girls marched into the room.
They were dressed in the most adorable royal blue pleated skirts with matching knee socks and sky-blue shirts.
On the top of their little heads they wore royal blue berets and draped across their chests were red sashes decorated with the badges they’d earned.
They looked to be no more than eight or nine years old.
“Young ladies, I know that your troupe leader has explained the nature of your task,”
Stanger said, speaking in a grandfatherly tone Thayne had never heard his boss use before.
“I’d like you to meet the Special Agents you’ll be helping today.
Is that okay with all of you?”
The six little girls nodded their heads.
One was chewing gum and she blew out an impressive bubble.
It popped all over her lips and nose.
Thayne had to cover his mouth with a hand to stop himself from bursting into laughter.
Stanger picked up a yellow pad from the conference room table and adjusted his reading glasses on his nose before glancing over at the little Bluebirds again.
“Ellie and Jenny?”
Two little girls stepped forward.
“There you are,”
Stanger said.
“You young ladies will be working with Sarah and Craig.”
He pointed at the agents and Sarah and Craig smiled.
Sarah waved them over and bent to speak to them.
“We’re so excited,”
Sarah said.
Jenny, a redhead with a ton of freckles on her nose, held up her closed fist to Craig.
He stared at it for a second and then he reached over and fist-bumped the Bluebird.
Jenny did the same to Sarah.
“Next,”
Stanger said, “I need Suzie and Melissa.”
Two more little girls stepped forward.
Stanger pointed right at Thayne.
“You young ladies will be working with Thayne and Tim.”
Thayne dropped into a squat as the two little girls walked over.
He held out a hand for them to shake.
“Nice to meet you.
We’re gonna win aren’t we?”
The little girl named Suzie giggled and shook his hand, nodding like a bobble-head.
Melissa stepped up and shook Thayne and Tim’s hands as well.
Thayne straightened to his full height, towering over the little girls.
“Finally, Tiffany and Joey, you’re going to work with Jarrett and Jose.”
The girls walked over and looked up at Jarrett.
“How old are you?”
one of them asked.
“My grandpa has white hair and he’s seventy.”
Thayne watched Jarrett’s smile drop away as he stared at the Bluebird who’d popped a bubble all over her face.
She was still chewing gum and staring at Jarrett.
Jarrett narrowed his eyes as he stared at the little girl.
“You must be Joey, right?”
“Yes,”
the bubble blower answered.
“So who gave you a boy’s name?”
he asked, deadpan.
Stanger loudly cleared his throat.
“Okay, I think it’s time to start your projects.
Please feel free to use my office, the conference room, and the bullpen to talk about what you want to do.
Remember, whatever team-building project you decide on has to reflect your patriotism and symbolize the best of America.
Please don’t tell the other teams what your team is going to do to win this contest.
Remember this is a contest and the project will be presented by the end of the day.
I will judge the winner.”
Stanger reached into his pocket and pulled out an envelope.
He opened it and pulled out three one-hundred dollar bills, handing one to each team.
“This money is to cover your expenses.
Lunch will be provided by the mess downstairs and will be brought to you.”
Sarah raised her hand.
“Sir, Craig and I have a question.”
“Go on.”
“Where are we supposed to build or display our project?”
“Anywhere in the building or parking lot.
If you choose the parking lot, one team will be assigned the back lot, one the front lot, and one a side lot so that you cannot see each other’s project until I come to judge.
Any other questions?”
“Can we use the garage?”
Jarrett asked.
Thayne narrowed his eyes at him.
What the hell is he planning?
“I suppose.
It’s a little dark down there but you are free to use the garage if you wish,”
Stanger replied.
Thayne watched Jarrett grin widely and lean over to whisper something in Jose’s ear.
Jose burst into laughter.
This is so not good.
“All right, you’re free to start your planning.”
Thayne grabbed Tim’s sleeve and pulled him aside.
“I have an idea.”
“Great.
Cause I sure don’t have a clue.”
Thayne squatted and put a hand on Suzie and Melissa’s shoulders as the other teams left the conference room.
“How do you feel about going into business and then giving the money to a charity?”
he whispered conspiratorially.
****
“This is amazing,”
SAC Stanger said, six hours later.
He was standing in front of a lemonade stand that Thayne, Tim, Suzie, and Melissa had built.
It was painted Bluebird royal blue but it had a large cup of pink lemonade painted on the front and the words “Fresh Lemonade 25 cents.
All proceeds to be donated to Wounded Warrior Project.”
on a board nailed to either side of the stand at the top.
Little Melissa and Suzie sat on chairs behind the stand that was located outside the front door of the building.
On the stand was a stack of plastic cups and a pitcher half-full of pink lemonade.
The Bluebirds were grinning.
“Would you like some lemonade?”
Suzie asked.
She was a pretty brunette with a smattering of freckles across the bridge of her nose.
Her hair was cut into a pixie and she had a bright red bow in her hair sticking out from under the beret which she had explained to Thayne was the only color of hair accessory the Bluebirds could wear.
“Why, yes.
Thank you,”
Stanger said.
Melissa poured Stanger a half cup of lemonade and handed it to him as Suzie held out her small hand, palm up.
Stanger set a quarter in it and Thayne watched as Suzie opened the square cigar box and threw it in.
It was full to the top with quarters.
Tim cocked an eyebrow and then smiled.
“How much have you raised?” he asked.
“Your quarter makes it $113.50 for the Wounded Warrior Project.”
Stanger’s eyebrows rose so high it was comical.
“That’s impressive.
Not only patriotic but All-American too.
I am incredibly impressed you managed to work as a team and helped out our vets at the same time.”
Thayne smiled.
“What have the others done?”
He glanced over at Tim who nodded, obviously just as interested.
“Yours is the first I’ve seen.
If you’d like to accompany me around to the back of the building, we can get a look at what Sarah and Craig’s team have been doing.
They’re working in the back parking lot.”
Thayne nodded and then leaned down so that he could speak to both little Bluebirds.
“Keep up the good work.
We’ll be back in a little while.”
He glanced over at the armed guard who stood outside the office and pointed at him.
“That policeman will make sure nothing happens to you, okay?”
“Yes, Special Agent Thayne,”
little Melissa said in her tiny voice.
She reached up and patted him on the cheek.
Pat. Pat. Pat.
Thayne reached out and returned the pat on her little head before walking off to catch up with Tim and Stanger.
He’d had a lot of fun with the girls today.
It hadn’t been a chore at all.
They walked around to the back parking lot and as soon as he rounded the corner, Thayne was surprised to see several people who’d stopped to form a semi-circle around whatever Sarah and Craig were doing.
They walked up and the crowd parted as soon as they recognized SAC Stanger.
What Thayne saw couldn’t really be put into words at first.
The crowd looked them over with smiles as they approached and as he caught sight of their project, Thayne heard a gasp from Tim who had come up to stand beside him.
“What in the hell…”
Stanger shushed him as he nodded to the little Bluebirds.
“Oh, sorry.
I mean, what in the heck is that?”
Thayne actually wanted to know the answer to that question himself.
One of Sarah and Craig’s Bluebirds stepped forward.
She was a pretty little girl with a wide face, chubby cheeks, and beautiful almond-shaped golden eyes.
When she smiled, she was missing her two front teeth.
“Hi, I’m Ellie,”
she said.
“Special Agent Sarah and Special Agent Craig helped Jenny and me build this depiction of the twin towers.”
Every time she pronounced a word with an ‘s’, she lisped through the gap in her teeth.
“I can… see that… I guess,”
Thayne remarked.
He cocked his head to the side and stared at the sculpture that stood approximately four feet tall.
It had a toothpick American flag sticking out of the top of each tower which were made out of…
“What the heck is it made of?”
Stanger asked.
Thayne thought he got a slight whiff of something meaty.
He looked over at Sarah and smirked at her.
“It’s made out of Spam, also known as Hawaiian steak, which comes from my home state of Hawaii,”
Ellie said.
“Um, actually, honey,”
Craig said, bending down to whisper in her ear.
“Spam doesn’t come from Hawaii.
It’s just eaten there a lot because it became a food staple during WWII when the US military began using it.”
Her large golden-brown eyes narrowed and her bottom lip jutted out.
“It is Hawaiian steak!”
She raised her little patent leather shoe and stomped on Craig’s foot.
He yelped and stepped back as Sarah burst into laughter.
The other Bluebird, Jenny, stepped forward and cleared her throat.
She was holding an index card and reading from it.
“In fact, the World Trade Center twin towers weren’t built with Spam.
They were built with… other stuff.”
She looked up with sparkling blue eyes and nodded her head as if that factoid that was important to pass on in case anyone missed it.
“But they’re not around anymore.
Someone knocked them down with planes in 2001,”
she concluded.
“Well, I must say I am… impressed with your ingenuity,”
SAC Stanger told the girls.
He glanced up at Sarah and Craig.
“Whose idea was it to use Spam as a medium?”
Thayne noticed that the Spam was stacked like meat bricks.
A gelatinous substance oozed from between the individual bricks, running down the side of the ‘building’ giving the whole sculpture a slightly sad effect.
In the summer heat, the building had begun to smell like weird barbecue.
“It was their idea,”
Sarah and Craig said in unison.
They pointed at Ellie and Jenny lightning quick.
SAC Stanger frowned at them but then he leaned down and patted the Bluebirds on top of their little berets.
“You did a very nice job and way to go with the patriotic theme of your team-building exercise.
Thank you for helping my two agents today.”
The girls both beamed up at Stanger.
Sarah walked up to Thayne and leaned in close.
“What did your team do?”
“They built a lemonade stand and sold lemonade.
In fact, they’re still out front doing it.
When we left them, they’d sold $113.50 which the girls are donating to the Wounded Warrior Project.”
“Awesome!”
Sarah said, slapping Thayne on the back.
“I’m dying to see what Jarrett and Jose are up to,”
Thayne said.
Sarah opened her mouth to respond when Stanger cut her off.
“Well, I suppose I can’t put it off anymore,”
Stanger said.
“Evans and Galvez are working in the building’s subterranean garage.
As much as I fear it, I suppose we should go make sure they haven’t found a way to undermine the building’s foundation.”
Thayne smiled as Sarah chuckled quietly from beside him.
They turned as a group, leaving Ellie and Jenny to pass out plates to the observers telling them that their twin towers were fully edible.
Thayne wasn’t surprised to see absolutely no one take a plate and some turn and scuttle away from the canned pork product edifice.
Thayne, Sarah, Tim, and Craig accompanied SAC Stanger into the building and then took the elevator down to the parking garage.
As soon as they walked out into the parking area, they heard the unmistakable sound of dueling banjos echoing off the cement walls.
Thayne couldn’t help but grin as he recognized Jarrett’s favorite type of music.
“What is that?”
Craig asked.
“It sounds like banjos,”
Sarah said.
“Banjos,”
Tim said, flatly.
“Evans’s favorite music,”
Sarah replied, shrugging.
“You’re kidding?”
Craig asked.
“Unfortunately not,”
Thayne replied.
“At least you didn’t have to listen to it all the way home from San Diego.”
He rolled his eyes as the others chuckled.
“Well, let’s see what trouble he’s gotten into,”
Stanger said.
“I doubt he could get into much trouble with Jose and the little Bluebirds keeping an eye on him,”
Craig said.
“Alas, you don’t know Evans well enough yet, Baldwin.
He could get into trouble anywhere and usually does,”
Sarah admitted with a smile.
“I’m beginning to get that impression,”
the young Marine replied.
They walked through the large subterranean garage following the sound of Bluegrass music until they came around the corner.
As soon as they did, they spied two lawn chairs propped up in front of Jarrett’s latest acquisition, a classic 1966 Chevy Nova, with its hood up.
Jarrett and Jose were sitting on the folding lawn chairs with their backs to them as the group walked up.
A transistor radio was blaring the music nearby.
As Thayne’s mouth dropped open, Jarrett raised his hand and gave directions to a small girl who was standing on a stepladder bent over the engine block.
She had her hands down in the car and Thayne was pretty sure he could see her twisting something as she blew a particularly large pink bubble.
“That’s it, Joe,”
Jarrett said.
“Just give it a little more torque.”
He blew a line of smoke into the air and Thayne realized Jarrett was holding a cigar.
“Okay, Jarrett,”
the tiny girl said, her voice just a little muffled as she spoke.
Thayne couldn’t believe his eyes and had to blink twice when he saw the other small girl squatting in front of Jarrett’s whitewall tires, scrubbing with a sponge.
She had her tongue between her lips and was putting all she could into the chore.
“Good job, mija,”
Jose said, “That’s the last one.
Looking good!”
He was obviously trying to encourage the little Bluebird to get the whitewall clean.
Sarah burst into laughter which made Jarrett and Jose shoot out of their chairs since they hadn’t seen them walk up.
They’d both shed their jackets and ties but other than that, they looked as relaxed and unruffled as they had when they’d walked into the office that morning.
As soon as they spotted Stanger, Jose broke out into a visible sweat.
“What in the hell is going on here?”
Stanger bellowed.
“Sir,”
Thayne said, leaning forward.
“The little girls…”
“Oh sorry, young ladies,”
he immediately apologized.
The two little girls looked over at the gathered agents.
The one bent over the engine block straightened on the stepladder.
She had black grease smudging her face and as she reached up to wipe away a trickle of sweat, Thayne noticed the silver socket wrench she held in her hand.
She wiped her forehead and more grease smeared across it.
Tiny wisps of hair were hanging in her eyes.
The other little girl stood tall but Thayne immediately spotted soap suds in her curls.
It trailed down both arms as she smoothed the red ribbon in her hair.
She was holding a large dripping sponge and her knee socks were drooping around her ankles.
Neither girls’ berets were anywhere in sight.
“Can you tell me what is going on here?”
Stanger shouted.
“And put out those cigars and turn off that blasted music right now!”
“Are those Cubans?”
Tim asked.
“Yes,”
Jarrett replied with a smirk.
He bent to turn off the radio and stub out his cigar on the garage floor.
“Boy did I get the wrong partner,”
Tim muttered.
“Darcy!”
Stanger was practically growling.
Thayne watched Tim raise both hands as he tried to calm Stanger down.
“That’s cold, Darcy,”
he protested.
“What? I love a good Cuban cigar.”
“Explain yourself, Evans.
I know this is your doing,”
Stanger grumbled as Thayne bit his lip to keep from grinning.
Jarrett dropped his hand to his side, still holding the stub of the cigar as he blinked innocently at his boss.
“I’m sure you’ve heard of a classic muscle car, SAC,”
he said, proudly.
“You can’t get any more all-American than a classic 1966 Chevy Nova and I just picked up this baby last week.
It needed a good waxing and a tune-up.”
“Yes, sir,”
Jose tried to explain, “And you can’t get any more supportive of women’s rights than teaching them how to tune up a classic automobile.”
“Starting them a little young, don’t you think?”
Stanger gritted out.
Thayne noticed how he glared at Galvez.
Jose nodded.
“Jarrett and I have been working all day to make sure that our Bluebirds are the best trained nine-year-old mechanics around.”
He moved to stand behind Tiffany, the girl with the sponge, placing his hands on both of her small shoulders and putting her between Stanger and himself.
Joey blew another bubble and it popped, covering her grease-smeared face.
Everyone watched her for a second and then turned back to SAC Stanger who held both hands at his sides.
Thayne noticed they were now clenched into fists.
“Well, I see what you mean,”
Stanger finally said.
Thayne figured it was for the sake of the Bluebirds.
“I know you young ladies were just following orders and you’ve done a fine job here.”
“No, this was a team building exercise,”
Tiffany squeaked in a tiny voice.
“Do you want to know the top speed for this baby?”
Sarah snorted from beside Thayne and he had to cover his mouth as he tried not to burst into laughter.
“No, but I’m quite certain you know, dear,”
Stanger said, “Now, since you agents have done such a fantastic job with your team building exercise, you get to join us up top so that we can have the judging.
I’ve decided that everyone gets ice cream.”
“Swell,”
Tiffany said, dropping her sponge in its bucket.
Joey climbed off the ladder and hooked her arm in her friend’s.
Thayne watched them march up to Jarrett and Jose and fist-bump them both.
Jarrett leaned down and patted them both on the head.
“Great job, girls.
I’m super proud of ya and even if you don’t win, just remember…”
“Semper Fi! Oorah, boys… Oorah!”
Jarrett grinned at the sound of their tiny voices and then glanced over at Thayne.
His dimples were deeply etched into his handsome face and Thayne couldn’t help but be utterly charmed by him.
He shook his head and smiled back as Jarrett walked up and gave him a silent glance.
His ice-blue eyes were dancing with barely concealed mirth and Thayne’s stomach did a little flip-flop.
Jarrett always managed to make him feel like this.
“You comin’?”
Jarrett asked, bending to pick up his discarded jacket and tie.
Thayne watched him tuck the cigar butt into a pocket of the suit jacket.
He suddenly had the inexplicable urge to take Jarrett’s hand, but he let the thought fade as Jarrett bumped his shoulder with his own.
“Come on, darlin’,”
he whispered.
It was barely audible in the dark garage but Thayne heard it.
“Okay, Jarrett.”
Thayne nodded as warmth spread through every inch of his body.
He shook his head, smiled a tiny smile, and followed his lover toward the elevators.