CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
The instant Cameron walked into his house, he was turned and pressed hard against the wall, his mouth taken in a bruising kiss filled with lips, tongue, and teeth.
Asher leaned his full weight against him, connecting them from mouth to hips, holding him in place easily.
He seemed to have six hands, and those hands were everywhere at once, touching, caressing, groping, kneading, before finally settling on Cameron’s waist to jerk him even closer.
Lightheaded from a combination of desire and lack of oxygen, Cameron clutched at Asher’s shirt, giving himself over to the urgency.
Hard and aching, desperate for relief, he thrust his hips, rubbing his throbbing erection against Asher’s.
His head spun. His eyes rolled back in his head.
He couldn’t have stopped the ragged moan that spilled from his mouth if he’d tried.
Then, just as suddenly as it had started, Asher pulled away.
Fisting both hands in his hair, he paced the narrow strip of hardwood floor between the kitchen and the living room, muttering words under his breath.
Cameron couldn’t make out what he said, but he appeared to be arguing with himself.
His entire body radiated frustration, but also something darker, something directed inward .
Cameron approached cautiously, blocking Asher’s path so that he had no choice but to stop and look at him. “We don’t have to go any further. Whatever you nee—”
“Fuck it,” Asher interrupted. In a single stride, he closed the gap between them, cradling Cameron’s face in both hands as he took his mouth in a fevered kiss.
“Yes,” Cameron encouraged in a throaty whisper as he grabbed Asher’s hips to hold him there. “Don’t stop.”
Sliding his hands under Asher’s shirt, he moaned as he moved his palms over the rippled expanse of his abs, exploring every inch of warm skin he could reach. With a huffing grunt, Asher released his mouth to strip the fabric off over his head, giving Cameron full access.
“So fucking sexy.” With just his index fingers, he traced the twin indentions at Asher’s hips that formed a deep V leading into his waistband. “You have an amazing body.”
He’d seen Asher naked before, but he didn’t think he’d ever get used to it.
The sight of all those hard muscles encased in smooth, bronzed skin made his mouth water and his dick pulse with the pounding rhythm of his heart.
His body was a work of art, as if he’d been carved from stone in the most exquisite detail, then kissed by the sun before being dropped right into Cameron’s living room.
“So do you,” Asher said as he divested Cameron of his T-shirt as well.
His hands came to rest on Cameron’s waist, his fingers flexing against his skin.
A low rumble vibrated in his chest, and his eyes darkened with lust as he smoothed his palms up Cameron’s side and around to his chest. “Your skin is so fucking soft. So goddamn warm.”
His right hand slid up to rest lightly at Cameron’s throat, pressing a thumb under his jaw to urge his head back. With his other hand, he drew light, teasing circles around Cameron’s nipple with his index finger, then scraped his nail over the hardening nub.
“You take my breath away,” Asher whispered, strained, ragged.
Cameron was doing a whole lot of not breathing of his own, especially when Asher’s lips brushed the sensitive skin just behind his ear. “More.”
The single word spilled out before he could stop it, and he felt Asher’s lips curve against the side of his neck.
“What do you want, Cam? Tell me.”
“More. Jesus, Ash, I don’t care. Just do something .” He was burning up, completely consumed, and he’d do anything for one more taste, one more touch, one more of anything Asher would give him.
Asher made a choked sound in the back of his throat, then his mouth was on Cameron’s again, hungry and desperate.
One hand on his neck, the other tangled in his hair, Asher walked him backwards until his shoulders pressed against the wall.
Their tongues met and tangled, sliding together with heat and desire, want and need.
It wasn’t enough .
“More.”
~
The kiss seemed to go on forever, yet not long enough. Asher didn’t think it would ever be long enough with Cameron.
His jeans felt too tight, his dick straining the integrity of his zipper. His heart hammered, his stomach clenched, and every nerve ending ignited. His body was all in, completely engaged, but silencing the battle in his mind proved more difficult.
Not that he didn’t want this. Fuck, he’d never wanted anything or anyone more. He and Cameron had been dancing around each other for weeks, and at times, he’d been frustrated and impatient. Now that they were there, balancing on the edge, his conscience wouldn’t shut the hell up.
Cameron was gorgeous, intelligent, and incredibly sweet.
A little shy, a little unsure, qualities that had never appealed to him before, but with Cameron, he found them oddly endearing.
He had the biggest heart with all the best intentions, and Asher had never met anyone so unwaveringly kind, even to those who didn’t deserve it.
What the hell am I doing?
More importantly, what the hell was Cameron doing with someone like him ?
He’d never given a shit about who he stuck his dick in before. Maybe if he’d been more selective, he wouldn’t have ended up in this mess with Kyle. If he’d been more careful about who he took to his bed, his world wouldn’t be dissolving into chaos.
How the hell could he drag Cameron into his fucked-up life?
Cameron didn’t do casual. He wasn’t the fuck-’em-and-leave-’em kind of guy. Asher didn’t even know people could feel things as deeply as Cameron did, but maybe he was starting to understand, because what he felt for the guy went deep. Way. Fucking. Deep.
The unfairness of it all left him feeling frayed and raw.
He could take Cameron to bed and fuck him until neither of them could move, but what would happen the next day?
Or the day after that? This thing between them was too new to ask Cameron to stick around for the eventual fallout.
Besides, he deserved far better than a na?ve trick turned indiscriminate manwhore.
He must have been more lost inside his head than he realized, because gentle hands took his face, and Cameron looked up at him with those soul-deep eyes.
“Did I lose you again?” One hand left his cheek, and fingertips fluttered against his temple. “What’s going on in that head of yours?”
Again . He’d already tried to walk away once tonight, and he’d failed spectacularly. This time had to be different. He had to do better. As much as he wanted Cameron, he couldn’t be selfish, not with something—someone—so important.
He wanted to explain, to make Cameron understand. Instead, he opened his mouth and blurted, “I can’t do this.”
Dropping his hands to his sides, Cameron nodded and locked gazes with him, watching, searching, dissecting Asher piece by piece. He didn’t ask why. He didn’t try to convince him to change his mind.
He just stared at him and said, “Talk to me.”
Sucked under the spell of those hypnotic eyes, Asher spilled everything. He told him all his concerns, his doubts, even his fears. There might have even been a recipe for chocolate chip cookies in there, because by the time he’d finished, he felt drained…empty.
“So,” Cameron said when Asher ran out of words, “let me see if I understand this. You think you’re not good enough for me.
You’re worried about what will happen with Kyle, but more about dragging me into the middle of it all.
” As he spoke, he ticked each item off on his fingers.
“You’ve had a lot, and I do mean a lot , of meaningless sex, but this—” He waved a hand between them. “—means something. Is that about it?”
Asher inhaled, puffing out his cheeks, then let out the breath on a frustrated sigh. “It’s a little more complicated than that, but yeah. Sounds about right. ”
A smirk tilted one side of Cameron’s lips. “I think you care, Ash.”
“I care.”
“I think you care a lot.”
What were they, ten? “Yes, I care about you, and I want to be fair to you.”
“What about what I want?”
Placing both hands on the wall beside Cameron’s head, trapping him there, Asher tilted his head to one side. “What?”
“I’m not the type to run when things get hard. I also don’t give up when I see something I want.”
It was immature and a needy, but he had to ask. “What do you want?”
Cameron’s hands settled on his waist and pulled him closer for a slow, thoughtful kiss. “You, Asher Dare. From the moment we met, I wanted you. Just because a storm may or may not be blowing in, that hasn’t changed.”
“The storm is definitely coming, and it’s going to be big. Maybe you want me now, but what about when everyone finds out exactly who I am? What happens when you have to tell your friends and family you’re dating a whore?”
Cameron’s eyes flashed with anger, and he grabbed Asher’s face, forcing him to meet his stare.
“Listen close, because I’m only going to say this once.
” He waited, not letting Asher look away.
“I don’t give a fuck about your past. You were a kid, and it breaks my fucking heart that you had to go through it.
That is the only thing I feel about the situation. ”
“I wasn’t a kid when I took that blogger home from the club.”
“You like sex. Who the hell doesn’t? As long as both parties are willing and able, it’s not anyone else’s business, including mine.” His eyes darkened, and his hands tightened on Asher’s face. “I’m. Not. Leaving. So, I guess the question is, are you?”
Against all his better judgment, the answer was too easy to give. If Cameron wanted him to stay, he’d stay. “I’m not leaving.” His heart rate slowed, and a sudden, inexplicable calm settled over him. “How the hell do you do that?”
“Do what?”
“Always manage to say exactly what I need to hear.”