Chapter 4
Murray was quickly coming to the conclusion that weddings were very stressful things indeed.
Even though he hadn’t been entirely sure about the whole thing when he’d accepted Philip’s request to be best man, he’d comforted himself with one thought – how hard could it be?
As it turned out? Very! Of course, Josh wasn’t helping matters one little bit.
Murray had tied his boat up at the wharf next to the shabby old craft owned by the council that that was rarely ever used, and then practically jogged to the hotel. By the time he arrived at the Dolphin and Anchor, the best-man-wannabe had already managed to reduce one of the flower-girls to tears. He’d also upset the catering staff so much that Murray would bet anything Josh’s sorbet would have a high concentration of added spit by the time it was served.
Murray had barely had the chance to greet the groom before Philip sent him in search of Josh - with orders to make sure he didn’t cause any more drama before the ceremony. He’d only just managed to track him down, and by the look of things, Josh was in serious danger of having his eyes gouged out by the purple-haired whirlwind who’d turned up to deliver the flowers.
Judging by the pure venom pouring from the trainee florist’s eyes, Murray was pretty sure she was more than capable of tearing Josh limb from limb… and enjoy the experience while she was at it. If it wasn’t for the fact that he had a bit of an ulterior motive, he’d have left the idiot to his fate. This was too good an opportunity to waste, though.
‘Josh, you’re needed inside,’ he said.
Josh didn’t even turn around, he was too busy ranting with his face pressed right up against the van window.
Murray let out an exasperated sigh. Striding forwards, he grabbed Josh by the scruff of the neck and dragged him away from the van.
‘What the…?’ Josh was practically frothing at the mouth, looking slightly unhinged.
‘Philip’s looking for you!’ said Murray, quickly inventing an excuse to get the idiot as far away from the irate girl inside the van as possible.
The magic words worked a treat, and Josh disappeared in a swish of self-importance, his ridiculous top hat tucked under one arm.
‘Cheers for that,’ breathed the girl. Her venomous scowl turned into a grateful grin as she wound the window down to talk to him. ‘I was just wondering whether headbutting him would count as unprofessional conduct. Might have still been worth it anyway!’
Murray grinned at her.
‘You’re not going to have a go at me for stopping here at the front instead of trying to get into the carpark too, are you?’ she added.
‘No chance!’ said Murray, holding his hands up in a gesture of surrender. ‘For one thing, I don’t want you to headbuttme, and for another - you’d never get into the carpark even if you wanted to.’
‘That’s what I told shorty arsy grumpface,’ she muttered. ‘Then he turned rabid and…’ she paused. ‘Sorry… he’s probably a friend of yours.’
‘Nope,’ said Murray mildly. ‘Definitely no friend of mine.’
‘Who asks an idiot like that to be their best man anyway?’ she said, looking perplexed.
‘No one in their right mind,’ chuckled Murray. ‘Who told you he’s best man?’
‘He did,’ huffed the girl. ‘About eleventy-billion times. Talk about a tiny man on a power trip. Anyway – I’d better get going.’
‘Two secs,’ said Murray quickly, ‘is Milly not coming?’
Damn… did he really have to sound quite so desperate?!
‘She’s here,’ said the girl, watching him closely, as though she sensed gossip in the air. ‘She decided to walk down. Didn’t want to get her dress messed up. I saw her go around the back of the hotel a few minutes before that git turned up. Why? Who’re you?’
Murray glanced towards the entrance of the carpark and a flutter of nerves ran through him. ‘Me?’ he said distractedly. ‘I’m no one. The… erm… the bride… was asking for Milly,’ he added, the fib escaping before he could stop it.
He really had to stop doing that! Still, it was worth it – Milly was here!
‘Okay Mr No One,’ said the girl. ‘Do you want me to text Milly and let her know?’
Murray widened his eyes in horror. ‘No… no need!’ he spluttered. ‘I’ll… erm… I’ll deal with it!’
‘Okay, cool!’ she said, shooting him a cheeky grin. ‘Right, I’d better dash. People to see! Flowers to deliver!’
Before Murray could say another word, he found himself staring at the back of the little pink van as it lurched away across the cobbles.
Well… she was a character!
As he watched the van disappear off towards the City Gates, Murray took a deep breath and willed his nerves to calm down. He had a feeling the sudden fluttering in his chest had nothing to do with his impending best man duties – and everything to do with the fact that at some point in the next few hours, he was finally going to officially meet Milly. If he didn’t wimp out, of course.
But first… he’d better go and save Philip from Josh’s less-than-tender ministrations… and perhaps find a convenient broom cupboard to lock the idiot in until after the ceremony.
Stealing himself, Murray let out a long sigh before heading back into the bar of the hotel. All he really wanted to do was join the rest of the guests. He’d love to grab a glass of bubbly, wander around admiring everyone’s ridiculous headwear, and work on summoning up a bit of courage before chatting up the woman who’d plagued his dreams for a full year and a half. Instead, he had to make sure there weren’t any further Josh-shaped disasters brewing.
‘Murray… got a sec?’
Kendra collared him just as he was heading through the bar.
‘Everything okay?’ he asked with a decided sinking sensation.
Kendra nodded and shrugged at the same time. The young barmaid was dressed in smart black trousers and a white blouse. She’d clearly been roped in as an extra waitress for the reception.
‘Yeah,’ she said hesitantly. ‘Chef just asked me to check with someone… are they really only giving the guests ten minutes to eat each course?’
Murray smirked and nodded. ‘That’s right.’
‘Weird!’ she whispered.
‘I know!’ Murray whispered back.
‘I’ll let Chef know. He’s going to be maaaad!’ she said, with a quick smile. ‘Thanks, Murray.’ She turned and disappeared off towards the kitchen again.
Murray shook his head. He couldn’t blame the chef for double-checking. This wedding was shaping up to be weird through and through.
For starters, the happy couple didn’t want the ceremony to drag on for too long… or the speeches… or anything, for that matter. It was all about romance against the clock.
The entire day was on a tight timetable just so that the new Mr and Mrs Williams could make the most of the discounted flights they’d got their hands on for the honeymoon. Not that there was anything wrong with that… but it seemed a shame to sprint through what was meant to be the most romantic day of their lives just for the sake of saving twenty-quid!
Frankly, Murray couldn’t quite fathom their logic… but then he wasn’t the one getting married. He was just the guy who’d been put in charge of a stopwatch and told to make sure the entire thing was timed with military precision.
‘Okay,’ said Elizabeth, dropping her new husband’s hand the moment they were out of sight of the cooing crowd. ‘That’s got that bit out of the way!’
Murray bit his tongue to stop himself from letting out a snort of surprised laughter. That had to go down as one of the least romantic sentences ever to be uttered by a newlywed - in the history of forever.
The bride turned to him with narrowed eyes, and he flinched.
‘We’ve got five minutes to throw these!’ she hissed, thrusting her massive bouquet under his nose. ‘Get everyone out there pronto. As soon as that’s done, I need them all in their seats and ready to eat in under ten minutes. GO! GO! GO!’
Murray sprang away from her and shot Philip a look of pure pity – only to find him gazing at his bride in total adoration. The man was either mad… or drugged? Either way, he was going to get out of there before Bridezilla could say anything else.
He started to usher a couple of befuddled-looking guests towards the back of the hotel. If he was lucky, maybe he’d bump into Milly out there. He’d love to say hello before the meal kicked off. If his mounting nerves were anything to go by, there was a good chance he might make a bit of a prat out of himself - and he’d prefer to get it over and done with outside, where people were less likely to overhear him placing his foot firmly in his mouth.
Murray had nearly caused chaos during the ceremony as it was. Just as he’d reached out to hand over Philip’s wedding band for the “with this ring, I thee wed” part of proceedings, he’d caught sight of Milly in the crowd. He’d promptly fumbled with the ring on its ridiculously slippery satin pillow - and disaster had only been averted when the celebrant had miraculously caught the glinting golden band in mid-flight.
After narrowly avoiding the embarrassing prospect of asking the entire congregation to get down on their hands and knees to search for a missing wedding ring, Murray had kept his back turned on them for the rest of the ceremony. He couldn’t afford to risk catching sight of Milly’s smile again. Heavens only knew what he’d do next!
As he stepped through the doors into the busy carpark, Murray took a deep breath of fresh air. Good. There were enough people out there already that he clearly wasn’t needed for a few seconds. He’d find a convenient spot to gather his wits - maybe somewhere over near the horse and carriage.
Murray skirted around the edge of the gathering crowd, making his way towards the shady patch where the horse stood with its eyes half-closed, ignoring the goings on around it with an air of admirable boredom.
Murray came to a halt just beyond a cluster of eager-looking women who were busy rolling up their sleeves – making sure their elbows were at the ready. He scanned their faces, searching for one in particular. Milly wasn’t amongst them… but then, considering she’d made the bouquet, he couldn’t imagine she’d want to take it home with her at the end of the day.
Where was she, though…?
Maybe it would be a better idea to focus on the task at hand, rather than ramping his nerves up even further. It wasn’t too long before he’d have to make his speech – and he’d been ordered to keep it under three minutes! He’d managed to cut it down to just two jokes, and a toast to the happy couple. If only he could remember the punchline to the second joke, he should be fine.
The problem was… it kept slipping his mind! It had something to do with a penguin… and a dragon? Or was it an armadillo…?
Damnit, he was going to have to check his notes again!
Murray fumbled in his pocket, and his fingers had just found the soft edges of his dog-eared speech when the gentle mutterings around him rose in volume.
Glancing up, he spotted Elizabeth yanking impatiently at the skirts of her big, white dress so that she could take up her position with her back to the group of waiting women – who were now screeching with excitement.
Murray watched as she raised the huge bunch of flowers in the air… and they started to fly. Distracted by the cheers from the rest of the crowd, his eyes swept over them, searching for Milly once again.
Suddenly, the sun went in and he shivered. Typical timing for it to cloud over! He glanced up at the sky in irritation - only to spot something huge heading straight for him.
That certainly wasn’t a cloud.
It was a bunch of bright sunflowers, roses and gerberas – large enough to obscure the sun.
Murray didn’t even think about ducking – there simply wasn’t time. He had just started to wonder exactly how much this was going to hurt… when everything went black.