21. What Am I Doing?
What Am I Doing?
Sheridan
Kissing Fly makes all the stress and worry fall away from my body.
As he leans back, I collapse into his arms.
What just happened?
A mind-blowing kiss.
That isn’t the part I meant, even though it’s true. “I’m sorry.”
“What?” He lifts my chin up to stare into his eyes.
“I made this all weird, and I’m sorry. It was just supposed to be fun.” Why did I do that? Why did I get all in my head trying to figure out who this man is?
“You know what happens after the princess kisses the fly.”
Wasn’t it the toad? “What?”
“She gets to know him. To figure out if he’s her prince or really just a bug in disguise.”
Is he saying what I think he is? “What if she isn’t a princess, but he’s really a prince?” And now we’re talking in metaphors about a story that isn’t even real.
My coat pocket vibrates as my phone starts to ring.
It’s a reprieve that doesn’t feel like one. “Excuse me for one second.” At this point, I don’t even care if it’s a scammer on the line. I’ll happily talk about the extended warranty on my twenty-year-old car rather than put my foot in my mouth anymore.
“Sheridan, where are you? We’ve been looking for you.” Dahlia asks.
Oops. I didn’t tell anyone when I let Fly drag me away…or I dragged him, depending on how you’re looking at it. “Sorry, I just wanted a few minutes of privacy.”
“You’re with him, aren’t you?” she whispers conspiratorially.
“Yes.” I glance over at Fly, who isn’t even pretending not to be watching my every move.
“EEEEEE. You need to tell me everything. I’ll distract Maverick until you’re done, but make it quick-ish…my guy gets antsy when he’s around people for too long.”
That isn’t surprising. Her guy doesn’t exactly give off people-person vibes. He’s more like, give me my woman and my house, then leave me alone, or I’ll hurt you, which is totally fair. Who wouldn’t want to spend their life in a pretty mansion with a woman like Dahlia?
What would Fly see in me past a few kisses and some fun?
Stop.
That’s Grammie talking, and you know it.
You’re just as valuable as anyone else in this world. Where you came from and how much money you have doesn’t determine your value…
But that doesn’t stop me from hearing Grammie say, ‘Who would want a valueless piece of trash like you? Why else would your father have dumped you on my doorstep like the filth you are?’
I turn away from him to hide the torment hiding in my brain in case Fly can read my mind, like it sometimes feels like he can.
Right now, I just need to get away from him…from everyone, and especially the voices echoing through my head.
What I wouldn’t give to just run for the next few hours.
But none of that’s possible at the moment, so my only option is to become a coward. “I’ll be there as soon as possible.” And out of this mess I made with Fly. I click off before she can tell me not to rush.
Though it feels wrong running away from him when things are this awkward. But maybe it’s for the best. This kissing game wasn’t ever meant to go any farther than a fun distraction during a short trip. I turn to Fly. “Sorry, that was my ride. We need to head back.”
“I can drive you home.”
What? No. “Um…I don’t think that’s a good idea. I’m staying in Urbium. It’s a fairly long drive home, and it’s late.”
He walks over to me. “I don’t mind the drive, but I think you need the space more than anything else.”
Honesty and understanding…wow. “You’re right.”
“I’ll give you that space, but I want to see you again.”
What do I say to that? “I’m going to be at the clubhouse setting up for all the wedding events.”
“No, I want to see you, not walk past you or sneak a kiss when we can. I want to take you on a date.”
“A date?”
“Yeah.” He reaches out and pulls me into his arms. “One where we talk, kiss, and do something fun together.”
When he says it like that, is there really any other option but to say, “Yes.”
“Give me your phone.”
Without thinking, I hold it out to him. Where did my survival instincts go? You don’t just hand a random stranger your phone.
He takes it, dials a number, then hands it back to me. “Now you have my number too.”
His number. I have Fly’s number permanently entered in my phone.
Wild.
***
“So tell me everything.” Dahlia turns around in her seat to stare at me as her husband starts driving us back to their mansion.
Can I just die of embarrassment instead?
If it wasn’t bad enough that he is sitting right there, Daria, who, it turns out, is his sister, is beside me.
Daria and I have been friends for almost as long as Dahlia and I have been, but we aren’t the gossip-about-guys type of friends…
Am I really that type of friend with anyone?
The idea of explaining something that doesn’t make sense to me seems impossible.
Daria lifts her communication device and starts typing, “Now might be a good time for us to talk about my upcoming trip.”
“Where are you going?” Dahlia smiles, trying to twist her body even more.
“She isn’t going anywhere but home.” Maverick does the grumpy dad thing well, even though Daria is almost my age.
“Knight is going on a book tour for the next month. Isn’t that so cool?” Daria acts like he didn’t say a word.
Wow. But then it’s not totally surprising. Knight is a big thing in the literary world. He writes books that make people think about the world in a different way, whereas I write about aliens flying around in funny ships, blowing each other up and discovering new life forms.
Which is cool in a geeky kind of way, but definitely not in a change-the-world kind of way.
“That’s amazing. I knew his recent book was going to be a bestseller. I cried all the way through it.” Dahlia’s eyes fill with tears just remembering it. “When are you two leaving?”
“They aren’t going anywhere. Daria isn’t wandering the world with that man.”
Uh-oh. Maverick’s voice alone would be enough to stop me from even considering going.
“Yes, I am. Knight asked me to go with him. It’s important that I support my friend.” Daria finger stabs the screen.
“Friend?” Maverick snaps. “You aren’t sharing a hotel room with that friend for a month. It’s not an option.”
“Maverick, they’re just friends.”
He shakes his head. “I don’t care. She’s not spending a month in his hotel room. I’ll kill him first.”
“Like we’re ones to judge.”
Wait, did Dahlia just infer what I think she did? I know the two of them eloped, but were they…
“It’s not the same. I was always respectful of you.”
Is respectful code for they didn’t do anything fun? Because it sure sounds like it.
“Knight would never be disrespectful. He’s my friend.” If that computer-generated voice on Daria’s machine could have an affronted voice, this would be the time to use it.
“I don’t trust him, which means you aren’t going. End of discussion.”
“You—” Daria’s hand hangs in the air for a long second, like she’s having a hard time figuring out whether to jump down Maverick’s throat or scream at him.
Either would be fair right about now. “You don’t trust him.
The man you trusted my life to a short time ago.
The man you literally trusted my life to. That’s the man you don’t trust?”
“It was only for a short time and extenuating circumstances.”
“What does time matter? If Knight needs me there for a day or a month, I’m going to be there to support him.” Daria’s nails tap on the screen, which she almost never does. “And we aren’t sharing a room. I’ll have my own the entire time. I told you we’re just friends.”
Maverick sucks in his breath through his teeth. They’re probably clenched so tight they might shatter. “That’s even worse. A single woman alone in a hotel room is a target.”
Daria shakes her head in frustration. “I won’t be alone. I’ll be with Knight.”
“You’ll be too far away. If you want to go with him, you’ve got to bring one of my guys with you for protection.”
Maverick, the scary businessman, has guys? Guys who can act as security guards.
“No. I’m not going to be walking around with one of your goons giving people angry faces everywhere I go. And none of them are sharing a hotel room with me for a month.” Daria has a point. How would that be any different than going with Knight?
“Fine, I’ll find you a female bodyguard.”
“No.” She practically slaps the keyboard. “I’m not a child, and this isn’t up for debate. This is me informing you that I will be gone for a month. Short of chaining me up and locking me in my bedroom, there is nothing that you can do to stop me.”
“That would be just fine with me,” Maverick mutters under his breath.
He wouldn’t really do that, would he?
Dahlia reaches out and places a hand on his arm. “Of course, we support any decision you make. It sounds like so much fun. Where are the tour stops?”
What would it have been like to have a family member care enough about me like that?